Here's my thought.
Are you going to take the kids to child care so you can single handedly turn the new house into a home and not a dump? How will you afford that? Or is hubby going to take off a year or so and get this new home up to living standards?
WHO IS GOING TO DO THE WORK IF YOU ARE TAKING CARE OF KIDS AND HE'S OUT LOOKING FOR WORK?
No one, that's who. You will be living in the home you buy until your kids are in school and you start doing it yourself.
Get a different financing on your current loan. Get a job, get child care assistance to help pay for your child care bill, find ways to limit your spending so you can help your family, consider all the things you can do.
My friends have all moved away in the past year or so due to job transfers and such. They all took huge loses on their homes. One was paid off and they paid something like $50K when they bought it years ago, their home they added on a family room and an extra bedroom sold for $65K. Pennies on the dollar of what it was worth a few years ago. Houses are not selling for what they are worth. They are selling for pennies on the dollar.
If you have a Realtor come in and value your home then you can see if it's worth it to sell it.
My sister just sold her home they had lived in for about 10 years, their house payment was about $1000 per month. They lived in this home, painted it, put in new carpet after the Realtor told them it had to be done, they completely redid a bathroom too.
Their home was on the market for a couple of months and sold for about $5000 more than they paid for it. They basically paid rent over a 10 year period. The value of their home had decreased so much that they only made $5000.
The new home they bought has 4 bedrooms, 2 living areas, a closed in sun room, a dining room, 3 car garage, is in an exclusive neighborhood in OKC, and it has a gorgeous inground pool with a slide and diving board. It has a storm shelter and a nice set apart garden area.
They only paid $190K for it.
I think until you talk to a Realtor and see what they say about the value of your home, what you'd have to fix, how much they would charge, and all that....then you can decide if it's worth it.
I'd rather not go through all the hassle of moving and living in someone else's run down home for God knows how long than give up a home that is comfortable and nicely redone.
You also know the Realtor is going to quote high to you right? They are going to say you can get $XXXXXXX.00 out of your home just to get you to list it with them. Then they wear you down with people who want to see it, then no one makes any offers that you'll take. She gets paid no matter what when it sells for less than what she tells you she can sell it for.
Then you've put all the money into it to get it updated, repainted, and repaired. So you actually out money in the long run.
So think it through. I wouldn't put a home on the market right now, if it was anything I like then I would hold on to it until the price of homes went back up a LOT.
Another option is to get another home and rent this one out. If you can find someone that will pay what your mortgage is and a bit more.
Also since you're so handy why not make the basement a separate living area and rent it out. Lots of people are doing that with their basements now. If you can give up all that space to sell it why not just make it a separate apartment and rent it out.