Dont Know What to Do - Middle River,MD

I am first time mom as well. You have to take him to a regular pediatrician. It can be nothing but it can be as well something serious..you do not want to miss it and than regret it. Do not underestimate it. It is better to deal with small thing than later with much bigger problem.There is not enough calls/visits to pediatricians !!! They are here for you !
When my son started to have crying for no reason we first thought he is having nightmares..we waited 2 weeks before we took him to a doc!well it turned out he had bad ear infection and he was given antibiotics. It was over in 5 days.

K., why don't you take him to his pediatrician. i wouldn't recommend ER, if he has a regular doctor. it could be anything anf it could be ear infection. if it is the latter you want to address it.
otherwise, at that age, babies cry a whole lot, but to put your mind at ease take him in
good luck
vlora

dont be to hard on yourself my son went through that stage until about 3 months old ,he cried alot mostly unconsolable . I just made sure he was fed ,clean diaper ,comfortable ,and if I thought he had gas I bicycled his little legs ,rubbed his belly and if all else failed I just held him and talked softly sometimes prayed while holding him .He soon stopped this stage . Friends of mine it lasted until 6 months .Good luck !

I would at least call the pediatrician to see if they have any suggestions or want to see him. It is possible that it is an ear infection, gas pains, reflux, even an allergy to the formula or breastmilk. It is also possible that it is nothing at all. Babies cry, its how they communicate and its the only way they know how at this point.

If it turns out to be just a crying "stage" that he is going through than just bear with it. Don't get too frustrated and definitely don't take it out on him. If you get irritated he will be able to sense that and things will only get worse. If you need to "escape" from the crying, put him in his crib or bassinet or somewhere else where he is safe, then walk away. It would be better for him to cry than for you to get stressed and do something you will end up regretting.

If you don't think it's an ear infection, take a look at when he is into these crying spells. If it's all the time then I would take him to let the dr. atleast check him out. If he's crying after eating it could be gas or reflux. Maybe his formula isn't agreeing with him or something in your breast milk is giving him an upset stomach. Maybe he's over stimulated. Does he get a pacifier? When my son would cry we were told to shoosh him semi loud right next to his ear and that would always settled him down. I think we read that in the happiest baby on the block book which you could probably find in the library. Has a couple of different ideas in it.

I am all for the crying it out process but I don't think it's appropriate at this early of an age. Your baby is still learning who you are and what role you have in his life. He needs to be comforted in my opinion not just left in his crib.

Good luck

This is the common age for the onset of colic. Dr Sears has good info on it: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/5/T051300.asp

It's best to hold and soothe as much as you can. They do get benefits from being held even when it doesn't stop the crying. But you also have to know when you've had enough and need to put them down for 5 minutes and go clear your head. I don't recommend a CIO routine but I do recommend keeping mama's sanity intact! http://www.mothering.com/articles/new_baby/bonding/connec... is a good article about that. :)

Hugs. This period is a hard, hard part. But try to enjoy every minute you can.

Not wanting to leave him in the crib to cry it out has nothing to do with being a first time mother. It's natural to feel that way. I always feel like it should be a last resort. I went through that with my daughter but she was much younger an it went away on its own. If it's nothing medical or physical (like temperature, itchy clothes, allergies, etc..) try white noise like the vacuum. If you have a carrier use it. Sometimes the motion helps. Or take him out for a walk, a change of environment also helps at times. I know it's hard and can drive you crazy. But hang in there. There will be times where there is nothing you can do but hold him and let him cry, especially if other distractions are not working.

Y.

My son began crying spells at about the same age. He wasn't colicky, but EVERY evening (even if he just woke up from a nap), he cried. The ONLY thing that helped him calm down (and I tried all suggestions...every child is an individual), is to lay his belly across my knees and rub his back, while "shooshing" to him.
Perhaps he had belly aches and the pressure helped??
As he got a little older he would occasionally cry like that when overstimulated (like when we had loud company). Then I would cradle him in my arms, take him to a dark and quiet room, swing him and shoosh.
He is now 7 months old, and no longer has crying spells! Hurray!!
Try to be patient and find what works best to soothe him, but definately get him checked out to make sure it's not anything serious.
Good luck!

Hi, K. :) Wow - I remember my little boy doing that! He's almost a year now, but when he was about three months old, he cried for 45 minutes non-stop one night and I had no clue why. Most people think I'm nuts, but I have never let him "cry it out". Whenever that happened, I would make sure all basic needs were met (fed, changed, yadda yadda yadda). I tried laying him down to see if he just wanted to be alone, but that wasn't it, either. Eventually, even though he wasn't hot, I unzipped his jammies and softly blew cool air up and down his little body....and voila! It worked! That worked more than once. I believe, that as mothers, we can cure without medicine. Just your touch might be all he needs :)

Hi Krystal,

When My first child, son, was born he was lactose intolerant, so he was gassy. You can ask about feeding at your appointment, and I hope it goes well. The best advice I discovered, at around 3 months of age for him, was that I was uptight when he was upset. I know, try not to be, right? Vaccuum noise may help, setting the baby carrier on the washing machine during the spin cycle could help if it's gas. Rubbing his back may ease the ache if it's gas, but if you are unsure his specific issue, just make sure you take a deep breath, to have the strength for the shushing and walking. Something WILL work, you just haven't come across it yet. Keep up the goos work, becuase remember you ARE trying. Yes, that does count for something!

K., you have some great advice here. I just wanted to chime in and tell you all four of my kids went through a stage around that age where they would cry for about 2-3 hours every night. It was so hard. But after a doctor's appt to rule out physical problems (it wasn't colic) I just came to accept this was their "destressing time." It lasted a few weeks and ended as quickly as it started.

Can you get in to see the doctor this week? I hope everything is ok with him.

You'll get through this, listen to what the other women here said about what to do if you feel really stressed out about it. And anything to distract him might help too. Some kids LIKE loud music, it calms them, my dd loved Mozart and Janis Joplin turned way up. Some kids want softer sounds. Try everything lol. One friend of mine used to run the shower over the baby bathtub, hold her ds in the sling, and the drumming sound would calm her son.

if its teething try "humphey's" they r great & taste like candy 2 kids.. also tylenol helps to sooth them 2 sleep but dont turn to tylenol very often... also i've found that holding them & rocking or walkin with them helps... when they feel u close to them it helps them build their bond & also soothes them... music is helpful..no matter how good or bad ur singing voice is it sounds heavenly to ur child.. just keep a soft tone.. i hope some of these help u at one point or another i'd love 2 hear from u to see how things r going...

Congrats & good luck

Take him to the doctor. Do you have a regular pediatrician? You should. ERs aren't geared toward anything but hemmorhaging. Follow up. Screaming means pain.

Also, do you have a Baby Bjorn or a sling? He could hate the labels in his outfit. A lot of baby clothes are soft on the outside and rough and icky on the inside. I gave up and started dressing my babies in sweat pants or little shorts and t-shirts with the labels cut out. I made sure the clothes were soft and paid attention to baby's reaction to the clothes.

Like everyone said, sometimes nothing helps and as long as the dr says he's ok, just leave him to cry and settle it for himself. At three months he is old enough to be taught to sleep through the night. I was told that by my ped when my son was 5 months and still getting me up 5 times a night. He was a crier. I had those moments where I could truly understand how a mom could just snap.........then you have to get away for your child's safety. I did and my son is still alive (lol)! He's almost 6 yrs. old now. I hear the book The Baby Whisperer or The Happiest Baby on the Block are helpful books to check out. Those weren't around when my son was that age.

Hi K. i would take him to the peditrician and have him checked out just to be on the safe side. I know that you may be stressed out but whatever it is it will pass. Just love him and be patient. Try to play soft music for him see if that works. I have 4 kids and have been babysitting for about 14 years so i know that you feel overwhelmed sometimes. If you need a break maybe you could ask his dad your mom a friend or family member to sit with him for an hour. Just remember it will pass. If yiu ever need someone to talk to please feel free to email me ____@____.com

Is it possible he's colicky (air build-up in the belly, it's painful, but it's just air...) My son was colicky at that age, a little less. The more crying, the more air he's taking in, the more likely he's making it worse-which means it's even more painful, the more crying.

It is excruciating. I remember all too well. There are little tricks--pushing both his feet up to his belly and sort of moving them around, rubbing his belly in a clock-wise position with just a bit of pressure (similar to what you may do for cramps, but not as deep)--in an effort to break the air bubbles up and hopefully cause him to pass gas to release the pressure. You may hear it moving around in there, sounds like a grumbling tummy.

Are you breastfeeding? For me, I had a great deal of stress and wasn't eating as well as I should, it affected my milk and the resulting colick took affect. Harder to get rid of than prevent.

The bottom line---you have to ride it out. Do what you can to decrease the gaseousness of the milk and in his belly, but ride it out.

Eventually it will pass.

First and foremost do not feel bad that you leave him crying in the crib. That allows him to learn to settle himself down and it allows you to gather yourself so that you can deal with the crying. Babies cry. Some for no reason, maybe the milk makes his stomach hurt, maybe he is colicky. If the doc says he is fine, then he might just be one of those babies that cry.

I am a single mom of a 9 year old and I remember praying to God sometimes that she would be quiet. I also remember clearly leaving her in the crib crying and walking away for fear I shook her to death. I needed to gather myself together so that I did not hurt her. Leaving her crying was nothing compared to what could have happened. Always give yourself that moment.

Hang in there.

Sorry you have to deal with the stress of a crying baby. It can be very upsetting and frustrating. A dr appt will rule out any illness. You may want to ask the dr about colic or GERD.
A 3 month old doesn't "cry for nothin". There IS something bothering him, and it is YOUR job to figure it out and meet his need. Are you breastfeeding or bottle feeding? If you are breastfeeding, there may be something in your diet giving him a belly ache. If he is on formula, maybe that is what gives him a tummy ache. Try a different formula (lactose free). Maybe he is going through a growth spurt and is hungrier than you know.
I hope you find a solution soon. If you need to take a break from his crying , that's ok. Constant crying is hard to deal with. Just remember, he is a new baby, and it is not his fault.
Good luck, HTH.