My husband has worked in the construction business for more than 12 years. That arena of work is very unpredictable because we NEVER know what his schedule will be like the next day, or when he will be getting off work today. It's hard to cope or even plan anything for more than 24 hours ahead of time, and even then, I'm always telling people, "It depends on when my husband gets home from work". In the summer months, he works many times, from 4 am til 10pm Mon-Sat. It's like he has a 2nd job and we NEVER see him, but appreciate the times we do get to spend time with him, like rain-days or Sundays. Over the years, I have learned to become a single parent in the summer months and come October/November, he's ready to call it quits and we begin to get on each others nerves, but we make it through every year, as long as we know what to expect and that those months are hard for us...as we've both reached the end of our rope with frustration. I get sick of doing EVERYTHING around the house and he gets sick or working NON-STOP. I guarantee that he hates it as much as you do so don't be too hard on him, he's doing it for the love of his family. I've learned a few tricks to cope while he's working alot.
- Hire a sitter (even family) once in a week, even for an hour to get out of the house on your own, even if it's for running an errand. It's amazing how that time by yourself makes you feel normal again and you can look forward to it everyday, especially on those hard days.
- Have your older kids help with some of the chores, like the trash and putting away the dishes. etc.
- Appreciate the freedom you get with raising your kids the way YOU want...it's all YOUR calendar...because, in a small way, you've just become a single parent, at least temporarily. This temporary mind-set will help you cope with taking everything in the house on yourself.
- Get a small pool for your yard...this will take up some time for the kids this summer when it's HOT. They'll be busy playing in the pool, while you can mow the yard or do some yard care, and still keep your eyes on the kids.
- While the kids are playing outside...ejoy that time outside yourself. Put a little sunscreen on and layback and read a magazine. You don't have to spend 100% of the time tending to your children if they are busy entertaining themselves. Take the 10-15 minutes when you can and close your eyes in the sun. :)
- Preplan your meals for the week, and always include a leftover night and a pizza night. That will take your mind off of cooking at least twice and that is a fun treat. I do Pizza night on Fridays (and most often, it's frozen or we make it at home) and I look forward not having to think about what to make.
- I've also declared Friday night, 'Movie Night, so children are occupied for at least 1 hour for me to read a magazine, do bills, or take a bath.
- Keep your kids on a schedule during the week to give you the much needed peace time at night everyday. That's important.
Good luck with these tips...I hope some of them work for ya. And,...don't look down on the fact that your hubby is working alot...there are possitives to the situation...so concentrate on those instead. :) The added money is always a benefit.