Doctor Fear

Updated on August 26, 2009
T.R. asks from Telford, PA
9 answers

my 15 month old is terrifyed at the doctors office, she completely freaks out at the sight of the exam table or the nurse and doctor. To the point where they sometimes skip less important parts of the exam (like measuring her head) because she is sooo upset and defiant to letting them examine her. I know this is a normal fear, but was hoping that maybe someone else had this same experience and knew some tricks to make her more comfortable at the doctors.

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So What Happened?

Thank you for all the advice and reassurance. I guess i just have to chalk it up to a phase because she already sits on my laps and get goldfish while we are at the doctors and STILL flips out like the world is ending. I guess just have a very strong willed child, as the nurse nicely put it. Hopefully she will outgrow this soon, since i think its harder on me than her. thanks again

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I agree that this is the perfect situation to ply her with ANY kind of goodie/treat she likes and let her have at it!

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K.B.

answers from Harrisburg on

My triplets got their treat when they went in, lolipops. If the staff gives them then maybe she'd be bribed more easily. Mine would throw such a fit and the staff would want to skip stuff and I said, heck no! Mine were born premature so I wanted all the stats to properly track them. So I'd pin them down to do it and sweet talk them, bribe them with more treats. After a while they calmed down and it was fine. I always talked how exciting the doc was, how great they were and all that. Sometimes they'd check me first so show it was fine.

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

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T.S.

answers from Pittsburgh on

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D.S.

answers from Allentown on

Hi T.,

I am surprised that the Doc and Nurse haven't discovered a way to do the exam without your child being so fearful.

I would look for another Pedicatrician for a second opinion.

Have you talked to the Doc to tell him your concerns? See how he/she responds and ask him to give you another Doc's name. That will help him understand that you are frantic about your child's fear.

Hope this helps. D.

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K.W.

answers from Philadelphia on

My daughter did the same thing at that age. She's now almost three & still gets into the exam room & says "I want to leave"! However, it's gotten much better. I think just that she's older helps (it's partly development). I also started talking to her about how nice her Dr. is, & what he does. On the days we go, I tell her right when she gets up & remind her how he has nice toys inthe waiting room, & what a nice guy he is. I got a book or two from the library to read. There's also an "Elmo goes to the Dr." game on PBSkids.org, that helps explain it, too.
She hated the Dr. because she had fluid in her ears for a long time when she was between 9Months & 2years, and the ear part of the exam bothered her. We also talked about that, & that's gotten better too. Maybe there's a part of the exam that she doesn't like or hurts her. Try explaining what that part of the exam is for. You could also bring along a lovey or any stuffed toy & I bet the Dr. will do a little "exam" on it before he exams her.
I read some of the posts that said to look for another Dr., and I completely disagree. This is a developmental issue that alot of kids go thru. Skipping the head measurement when all the other indicators are normal is NOT a big deal. The Drs. know that, and they also know that some kids react poorly to some parts of the exam. All kids are different. I know that my Dr. is FABULOUS, and skipped measuring the head sometimes when my daughter was having a hard time, because everything else was normal. When he needed to look in her ears - that when she was the most irrate - he had a technique to do it because it was important. My daughter also had to see a Pediatric Opthamologist & hated that the first time, too. It's a developmental thing & she'll outgrow it with your help.
Good Luck! It does get better!

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D.W.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hold your child in your lap. It seemed to work a lot better for my son when they examine him. he does not mind as much when he sits on my lap. he lets them listen to his breathing,look at his ear. the only thing he does not like is if they try to look in his mouth. it is also a lot better for shots if they sit in your lap. i think putting them on the exam table and holding them down freaks them out. I think when they are sitting with you they feel more secure.

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M.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

I think most kids go through this to some degree at some point, but it sounds like it could be interfering with your daughter's care. I would try to get some books and videos about going to the doctor - I think there may be an Elmo video and I'm sure there are others and definitely there are books available. Mix them into your usual reading/viewing randomly, not just right before a doctor's visit.

Also, if you don't have a play doctor's kit, pick one up and let her play with it, giving you and her dolls/stuffed animals checkups.

Also, at our ped's office, they generally have you hold the child on your lap while they examine him/her, and that seems to keep them a little more at ease. There are some things they may still need to use the exam table for, but ask if you can hold your daughter for as much as possible.

Good luck!

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N.K.

answers from Allentown on

I don't have any good tricks to tell you about only that I went through the same thing with my little girl EVERY SINGLE TIME!! It didn't matter if it was the same office or a different one when we were on vacation she just went crazy. They once just gave her antibiotics because they thought she had strep throat but couldn't even get her to open her mouth or anything. BUT...she just turned 2 last week and we had to go to the doctor she walked in stood on the scale and saw the doctor, got a strep culture and all and never cried once!! So the good new is it will get better!! I have no idea what brought on the change. The whole doctors office was in awe. Hang in there and know you are not alone :)

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N.O.

answers from Philadelphia on

My daughter did the same thing when she was around that age. I really think it was mostly because of the shots that she was antisiapting(sp). What I did was hold her thru as much of the exam as possible, and I also would bring her doggie (still her favorite toy at 7) for her to hold during the exam. Her doc would 'exam' her doggie first, and then move on to her. He even would let her help with the exam of her doggie.

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