M.F.
I think as long as she is watching educational shows it is okay. You say you are giving her interaction. Are there any activities besides tv that she can do unattended? A great video series is signing time
My daughter is 14 months old and I have her watch TV for many hours each day because I work from home and I can't spend too much time with her when I'm busy working all day. She watches educational shows, it's still a TV. I do take breaks and read to her and play with her whenever I can, but I know that she watches TV way too much and I feel so guilty all the time.
I do love being at home with her even though I'm always busy working, I do feel bad that I rely on TV too much and use it as a baby-sitter.
I've read many different opinions about it, but I still want to know what you guys think about it and I want to know if there are any others moms who are in the same situation as I am.
Thank you.
First of all, I want to thank everyone for sharing your stories, thoughts, and ideas. I was so glad that I decided to ask you guys about this and was so surprised to see how many moms replied. For past 2 days, she only watched TV for 1 hour when I was really busy with work, but the rest of the day, the TV was turned off! I also made a commitment to myself that I will not be that workaholic mom that I am, and spend more time with my daughter and stop working so hard and much when I'm not even supposed to be so that I can try to be a perfect employee.
I still feel so guilty about the fact that she did watch TV a lot in the past, but I promised myself that I will try harder to make play time more fun for her without so much TV. It's been so hard working all the time and raising an active baby at the same time, but it's definitely worth having her at home with me after what she went through at the daycare she was in before. My job has been also extra stressful and hectic, which made me neglect her more, but I need to realize what's more important, which is my daughter. When I get so busy and have so much going on with work, I seem to get sucked in to this warp that I cannot get out off and can't do anything with my daughter. I feel so sad every time I think of that.
Once again, I thank you all again for your great messages and it really meant so much to me and can't thank you enough. I know that my daughter also thank you for changes that we are making for her!
Jin
I think as long as she is watching educational shows it is okay. You say you are giving her interaction. Are there any activities besides tv that she can do unattended? A great video series is signing time
I know how you feel. I too work from home and my little one does spend some time in front of the TV. I feel guilty about it, but like you--I try and do things with her on a break or read to her. On the days I feel extra guilty, I just say to myself that she's home, with me...in a safe environment...she's being cared for and she's loved. I hate to think of a stranger watching her on a daily basis and knowing that I'm the one here with her, makes it all worth it. It helps me get through it!
Hang in there!
T.
Frederick, MD
Hi Jin!
I think too much television is not good. The American Academy of Pediatrics reccommends no more than about 2 hours a day for children between the ages of 1-4. It also depends on what she's watching. The Baby Einstein tapes,Teletubbies, Kipper all may seem like mindless dribble to us, but for a child of her age- they are very educational.
I would suggest that perhaps you should look into finding a family childcare home and enrolling her part time so she can have the interaction with other children- instead of being put in front of the tv most of the day.
It's good your taking breaks from the tv with her, but at this age she really needs the stimulation of other children and being outdoors and doing things with her hands and mind.
I would limit the amount of t.v. to 30 minute increments. After 30 minutes, have 1 hour without t.v. Set-up a room that is completely childproof for her to play in (if you can't give her an entire room, get a super yard to give her a large play area - and contain the mess). Make sure she is still within your line of sight though.
Another option would be, have a middle school or high school student come over when they get out of school. Even just 2-3 hours of that one on one stimulation, free of the t.v. would be great for your daughter, and for you.
I am a strong believer in having some outside play time also. Naturally if it is raining or extremely cold (or if the child is very sick) than the time should be skipped. As L. as the weather is not extreme, I try to take the baby out that I nanny for every day, even if its just for 10 minutes. Bundle her up, and take her out (or have a mother's helper take her out).
I am in the same situation as you, I work from home and even though my 4 year old goes to daycare, I have my 10 month old home with me all day. I have Baby Einstein videos playing when he's awake and he is very fascinated by them. He will play by himself in a large play pen area and watch the videos. Of course, I do take breaks and play with him and feed him. I personally feel that too much is put on television use and I really think it depends on the other things you are doing. If that's all the interaction you have with them, then its not good, but if you need a break and are letting them watch educational programs, I think it is fine, even help. Both my boys are very active, normal weight children and have actually learned alot from these shows and I spend plenty of quality time with them. I still would much rather have him home with me while I work, then at a daycare without me. Don't get me wrong, I do love daycare for my older son, but for the younger one, I feel he still needs to be with me. So I wouldn't worry about it, it sounds like you love your daughter and spend quality time with her even if she does watch TV. We do what we have to do and don't let anyone who is not in your situation make you feel bad for it!!
I am an online student and a writer so I'm at home with my baby too. She's 16 months old and we don't watch tv. The only time the tv is on in my house during the day is if it's tuned to the music channels. And not MTV either, the ones that just play music and no videos.
While I'm working she is playing with her toys or looking at her boooks by herself. We take breaks and read togther and play together so that she gets that as well. I don't think tv is bad but I don't think its a good idea to rely on it so heavily. A little bit a week is alright but every day for hours isn't good at all IMO.
Try having music playing during the day and provide a varity of toys for your baby. It will help her learn to play on her own and use her imagination.
Jin... Thank you for posting this question. I am as well struggling with my son watching too much television. These suggestions are so helpful. Last week I picked up some playdough, crayons, a couple of motor skills toys, jumbo coloring pad, and finger paints at Walmart for under $20. Everyday I set up stations in our living and dining room with all his toys. I try to switch it up and provide something new for him to discover. I turn on music and we dance. I sang to him as well. I am in school and have a 4 month old, so I have to divide my attention (normally that's where I would use the tv). I have created a schedule so that I can manage my interaction time with him, my daughter, my school work, and school schedule. Creating a schedule would be another idea so that you would be able to monitor tv watching, playtime, nap, storytime, and interaction time w/ your child. This maybe helpful!
Hi there. You have gotten some pretty good feedback so far. In addition to providing extra reasurrance that we all let our kids watch too much tv at times and to not beat yourself up over it.... I also wanted to add a couple more thing that I don't believe were mentioned. One of things that not watching tv does for our kids, is to make them more creative and learn how to entertain themselves. But, so far everyone has mentioned toys, coloring, playdoh, etc... And while my son definately has all of those things, I also have been into just letting him use normal everyday household things that people don't typically think to give their kids as toys. Such as an empty water bottle, an empty oatmeal container as a drum, a cardboard box made into a castle, old wrapping paper (sometimes it is good to just let them make a mess... it can be cleaned up later and it will keep them entertained and nourish their creative side) old dvd or cd cases, etc... Just to name a few things off the top of my head that have provided my son with hours of entertainment!! Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying to use those things in place of educational toys, but rather, in addition to them. It saves you money (all those toys add up), it buys you more time when your busy, it helps them with their creativity and imagination, etc... Just wanted to throw that out there. Another suggestion is books on tape. It has been mentioned and I'm sure that we all recognize the value of reading versus tv, but again, some days you are just swamped.... So giving them a book that is accompanied by an audio tape is great. Even if they are to young to obviously follow along correctly, the voice will remind them of when you read to them and they are likely to sit and flip through the book while listening. And even if they put the book down, the tape will often still catch their interest and they will listen to the story while playing with their toys! Hope these suggestions help some. Don't be so hard on yourself!! You are a busy mom and you do the best you can like all of us. Some days we do great and other days we do the bare minimum or "good enough" and that is ok! Keep up the good work! :)
Jin,
We all know, none of us need articles to tell us too much TV is bad. Bad, as in, the kids need be active, creative, played with, let them play etc.
I am sure that's not what you're asking about.
In reality, all of us let our kids watch tv without setting a timer to let us know TV has been on for 30 minutes. At least I do not have a timer. Here's a suggestion, pull one toy at a time for her. That way she doesn't have access to everything and that way she will not get bored too fast while you work.
So, pull out crayoons and print characters from noggin.com. give her one at a time. TV off st this time. When she is done with crayons, bring the playdough (all of this needs to be played with on a small her size table put somewhere you can see her). let her play with playdough. This two alone should easily make an hr of play. Then turn on the TV, or better yet if you have the option of stuff you can record, and then let her watch one show. In meantime you work. After the show is over, bring blocks for her to play and ask her to build you a very big big castle. Let her play. After she is done, then go sit with her and read her a book etc.
This way she will get to do a few things on her own, watch some TV and get some time with you.
Do not stress and do not feel guilty about how much TV time she is getting. All moms do their best, especially working moms, to try jugle every aspect of life.
One mom suggested you bring a bigger kid for an hour or so to play with her. Great idea!
Good luck
vlora
Hi Jin - I found this article...hope it helps answer your questions! Kind regards, G.
How Much TV Is Too Much For Your Toddler?
By Cassandra Germsheid
At least one third of households have their TV turned on all the time. This I can understand. But would you believe one in four children under the age of 2 have a TV in their bedroom?
Parents and pediatricians are now questioning how much TV is too much. Is it affecting toddlers' attention spans? Is it causing Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)? New studies are saying that it is a factor. The more TV your toddler watches, the greater their risk of developing attention difficulties. Too much of the tube is also a factor in childhood obesity.
Here's some more food for thought. If your toddler watches TV all day, when do they have a chance to use their own imagination? Where have the days gone when going outside to play was the solution for boredom?
When I was a kid, my grandmother would make me go outside and play. If it was cold outside, I would dress up really warm. You wouldn't dare tell her you were bored, or she would give you chores to do. So, I would stay outside for hours. I had to use my imagination and find ways to cure my boredom. I would make snow forts, slide down the hills on a sled and play with the animals.
Today, most parents are turning to TV to keep their kids entertained. And why wouldn't they? With shows like Barney, Arthur, and Boohbah, you could easily keep your child glued to the TV all day long.
Here's the kicker. An average 3-year old should be physically active for about an hour a day. But studies have shown that they are only active for 20 minutes. And we wonder why so many kids are becoming obese!
There are plenty of ways to reduce the amount of TV your kids watch. There are also lots of things to do instead of being a couch potato.
One reason your child might be watching more TV is because they like the music. Instead of turning on the TV for them, put on a CD.
Don't eat in front of the TV. Make mealtime a time for family to sit together and talk.
Try offering rewards to your toddler for not watching TV.
Distract your toddler with other things, like toys or puzzles. Don't leave the TV running in the background.
Go outside and let your child explore. Going for walks will introduce your toddler to new things, but letting them walk instead of staying in the stroller will also help increase their physical activity.
Reading books is a very important part of your toddler's life. It encourages and enhances their imagination. It's also fundamental for their language development.
Make sure you discuss your "TV rules" with family members and any other caregivers.
Here's another reason to turn off the TV. Not only will you have a more active toddler, you might improve your own relationship with your partner by interacting and communicating more. This is beneficial for both you and the kids by showing a good example.
You don't have to take your kid back to the stone ages, but keeping their day filled with a variety of activities is important for their growth and development. They will thank you when they're older.
About the Author:
Cassandra Germsheid is the owner of Baby Tips Online (http://www.babytipsonline.com) where parents can find information on pregnancy, babies and parenting.
Source: www.isnare.com
Hi Jin. Alot of moma are guilty of letting TV be a babysitter to get things done. I limit what my 3 yr watches. He also watches just the educations stuff (no Sponge Bob or Rugrats).
HOWEVER, my son also has PDD-NOS (autism spectrum disorder) and in recent studies along with ADD, ADHD, autism has been a blip on the radar of how bad tv is for babies/toddlers.
My boy watched alot more than I allow him now when he was youger before he was diagnosed.
I am not trying to scare you just inform you to engage your child.
I totally agree w/taking breaks, reading storied, playing music and setting up a room or super play yard so the child is safe and secure. Change her toy about every 20 minutes and give yourself a break too from work to read the child a story or take a walk.
N.
Hi Jin,
I was going to right my opinion about Tv watching...however, I have reconsidered. This is why. I think there is enough guilt and doubt in EVERY mother's life on how we are raising our children. We all WANT what is best for them and do our best to achieve that. Is it always right? Doubt it... Do we make mistakes? For sure... But the fact is there is only One who is perfect and everyone else is forgiven. My prayer is for all of us mother's to give ourselves the forgiveness and grace we receive from above!!!
How many hours a day do you think she watches TV?
Can you she play by herself? I know you said youwork from home, so have you thought about maybe setting up a little area in the room you are working and letting her have some play time without the TV? I would try playing some music while she plays as well.
I think that if you let her watch TV that is educational, as well as some play time withuot the TV and you takes breaks to play and read to her than I wouldnt worry so much. I would just make sure at night when you are done with work and on the days you dont work, maybe just dont watch TV at all.
I am looking into working from home, what work do you do if you dont mind me asking?
I understand the difficulty. I do some contract work from home occassionally. I've been having my grandmother and my father in law come over during that time for 2 to 3 hours a day so that someone is with my son. I try to do most of my work when my son naps or is down for the night. I limit his tv to two shows a day. Each 30 minutes long. It's hard, but I agree you cannot be that dependent on the tv. Maybe you could hire someone for a few hours a day to make sure she gets some social interaction. If you have a college or a high school near you try to call the admissions office or look online to see if you could find a student majoring in child development, or they could maybe post a job on a student job board. At least you are home too, so you don't have to worry too much about leaving your baby. Just some thoughts. I hope it helps.
My daughter is almost two and I, too, am guilty of leaving her in front of the TV to get stuff done. Even now she is in the other room watching DragonTales. I'm a SAHM. There is no way I would ever put my children in day care as long as I can afford to keep them with me. She does get some interaction with other kids as we go to church and she's in the nursery every Sunday. Once in a while during the week we visit with friends who have kids close to her age. This "limited" amount of interaction with other kids and "excessive" amount of TV has done nothing to stunt her growth in any way. In fact, she's way ahead of the majority of children I know her age and has been for months. I don't think your solution should be to put your child in day care like some suggested. Just keep doing what you're doing. Let her watch TV, but don't leave it on all day. Works fine for my daughter and she does have an imagination as well.
It would probably be better for baby for her to be in a day care center during that time, even for a few hours a day. It's not the TV itself that's bad, it's the too much TV. I mean, too much of anything is bad!
I don't think that it would be better for her to be playing with blocks. It's that she should have the social interaction.
But that doesn't mean you should be her entertainment committee. I mean, putting her in a Baby Bjorn while you did housework would be preferable to having her play with some so-called Baby Einstein toy.
On the other hand, I don't think there's anything wrong with a little TV.
But don't get me started on video games.
I've actually have watched some of the educational programs with my little cousin and there very educational. I think she got smarter because of those shows. They teach you stuff that even school can't teach them. Like being social for example. Teachers won't take the time to teach kids how to be social keep letting her watch them there good for her. Especially on nick and Disney.
Jin,
Unfortunatly I am in the same situation. My son just turned 2 and I have worked from home since he was 8mo. I do feel guilty about it alot too and I try to find other things for him to do. I will let him watch one show and then he has to play for a while before he can watch another one. And I try to get as much work done during nap time and when daddy gets home. As a plus though he can already identify several letters, numbers, shapes and colors. He can count to 7 and say almost half of the alphabet.
With all of that said there have been several times in the last year where the pros and being home have definatly out weighted a babysitter or daycare!
S. R
There is some research that suggest a link to hyperactivity and ADHD with kids that watch TV before 2 years old. But I have to say, I let my daughter watch TV before she turned 2. I picked a few educational shows here and there and her vocabulary soared. So I don't think TV can be all bad. I guess you just have to watch out and see how much is too much. I try to make sure she gets plenty of other activities as well throughout the day.
Good luck.
Y.
My personal opinion is that if you feel like your relying on it too much then you probably are. There are other options other than you entertaining her while you are getting chores done. I turn the tv off after one show and if I need to get something done I will take two minutes to get my daughter involved in an activity whether it's coloring or playing with her baby dolls and then I can do what I need to do.
Hope this helps:)
Jen
I personally just saw a link (I will try to send it to you tomorrow) that says how too many hours of TV leads to autism, cancer, and some other things for children under 5. I personally agree...just by the radiation that it gives off. I read somewhere that more than 2 hours per day is not good. My 3-yr. old (who is an only child) goes to her room to play with her dolls or My Little Pony or even pretends to read a book when I turn off the TV. I share your guilt...I hope you find some great solutions on here...
HI JIN IM NOT SURE WHAT YOUR FINANCIAL SITUATION IS BUT YOU MAY WANT TO TRY TO PUT HER IN A DAYCARE 2-3 DAYS A WEEK. SHE IS AT AN AGE WHERE SHE NEEDS CONTACT AND INTERACTION. SHE NEEDS SOMEONE TO PLAY WITH. ALSO IF YOUR MOM OR SOMEONE IN THE FAMILY CAN COME OVER AND SIT AND PLAY WITH HER. I KNOW YOU ENJOY HAVING HER HOME BUT IT REALLY ISNT GOOD FOR HER TO HAVE SO MUCH ALONE TIME OR TV TIME. SHE NEEDS TO INTERACT WITH FRIENDS HER AGE. I WISH YOU LUCK PLEASE LET US KNOW HOW IT WORKS OUT. STEPH