Do You REALLY Do Everything the Pediatrician Says?

Nope, I don't. My sons pediatrician prescribed a deadly dose of insulin for my son when he was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes, or Diabetes M1 as it's now referred to. Thankfully, my husband and I were familiar with insulin dosing due to my husband and daughter having Diabetes M1, that we knew not to give it to him.

But, like Molly S. said, doctors are people too. I made my doctor aware of the problem and he appreciated the fact that I didn't just blindly follow his advice.

And I agree that in Rachel D's case, the peds office would ALWAYS say to take him to the ER to avoid liability, not always just because they consider it an emergency.

I am very lucky to have a pediatrician who respects the "mom instinct" - he is an older guy who has always listened to me and never ever steered me wrong. As a young mom this was a little disconcerting to me, as I felt I had NONE of the answers! But over time, I came to realize that no one knows my children like I do, and that gave me a great deal of confidence in my parenting skills. He has always been deferential to my opinion on things, and taught me to follow my instincts. He is in a solo practice, so I never had the issue of conflicting opinions from a group of doctors. I have appreciated that degree of consistency over the years. He is definitely one in a million!

THANK YOU.

If I am on the fence about something, I will call the pediatrician. If, like you said, they HAVE to recommend taking the child to the ER or bring him to the office, then I will weigh my options again.

Obviously, the case with my son, he was NOT in any kind of life threatening situation. Had that been the case, OF COURSE we would have been in the ER, not at the computer.

I am a former EMT, plus, my mommy gut feeling has NEVER steered me (or my babies) wrong. I have a great head on my shoulders... sometimes asking for a second opinion just helps confirm my initial suspicions... like the other day.

I really appreciate you asking this!! I can't imagine, from some of the responses I had gotten, how many people rush their kids to the ER for every bump, scrap, and splinter, and take up badly needed beds that could be used to critical care patients. I think some people need to re-evaluate their own mommy gut feelings :)

S., I do think that many ped's offices routinely say to take a kid to the ER without knowing enough to really make that assessment. That's the problem with not seeing the regular doc. It's very expensive to visit the ER just because the regular doctor isn't open. I have taken my kids to the ER when I knew they needed stitches, but they've never been sick enough for me to take them other than an injury.

But I always called - I never tried to figure it out by myself because I didn't want to be wrong. I gave lots of description, and my docs asked lots of questions before deciding that we could wait til the morning. I've had some really good peds, S.. And my peds usually told me pros and cons of issues we're talking about and then I make an informed decision. I'm teaching my sons to do that with their general practicioner now.

I do think that having a relationship with a doctor in advance of a child getting sick is a very important thing. Well visits may not be important to some, but if a doctor has never seen your child and you find out you need an advocate for your child all of a sudden, having a doctor who knows you and your child can be extremely valuable. And sometimes at well visits, a doctor can find a symptomless problem that can head off a serious problem down the line or even save a child's life. I wouldn't trade that for all the tea in China, regardless of whether or not I liked doctors.

The best thing we can do as mothers is to not walk blindly into caring for our children, but also not think that we know EVERYTHING and thumb our nose at the medical community.

Added after all your unwanted private messagesto me and your public edit, Momof3girls: We ALL know of your vast medical knowledge because you mention it in almost every post you answer that has to do with anything medical. Since you PM'd me over and over to make fun of me for being afraid I would die in childbirth because I had a birth that is different from what you practice as a midwife, I do think you thumb your nose at what you don't consider part of your medical beliefs. If you are going to tell everyone you don't take your kids to the doctor, you will have some people believing you think you know more than the medical establishment.

Dawn

Hi S.,

Most of the time I do take my pediatrician's advice. His staff is awesome and honest as well as realistic. There have been times when I called with symptoms and his nurse said "Well it sounds like you can wait a few days and see what happens, but if you really feel more comfortable seeing the doctor I will certainly schedule you!" They are always willing to tell me when I don't need to worry.

Ultimately, though, my gut instinct is usually right. When I think it's time to go to the doc, I do, and I'm usually right on that something is wrong. When I think it's ok to wait it out, I do, and I'm usually right on. I don't feel the need to call the doc for every little thing.

I agree with you S., people sometimes can't or won't think for themselves and yes, they were really harsh on Rachel and I didn't agree with that. At the end of the day, we Moms need to be able to be level-headed, assess situations, and make the right decisions for our kids. The pedi has tons of patients to deal with so we can't rely on him all the time!

I don't ignore what my pediatrician recommends. I discuss my reservations with him and we make an educated decision. I take my son for well visits so I know that his hearing is checked regularly, that his eyes are checked, that a congenital or acquired heart anomaly will be detected before clinical signs that a mom can detect occur and so that when I call with a question, I have a solid doctor patient relationship. Oh, and I like to have my son pumped full of the vaccines that have prevented innumerable deaths due to measles, pertussis, polio and other diseases that because of vaccination, we only read about now in Little Women, rather than the local obituary column.

Doctors are people. They make mistakes all the time. If I don't agree with my pedi or I feel it goes against my instinct as a mama, then of course I am NOT going to follow their advice. But part of my picking my pedi is that we mesh really well, he understands our family and he isn't pushy. he gives options instead of just telling me what we are going to do. Its my job as a parent to dicern what is the right course of action for my child regardless of what the doctors say.

M

I do what I feel is best usually! Sometimes I'll take them in when they tell me to even if I feel like they'd be fine but normally I go with my gut.
I'm really lucky to have an AWESOME pediatrician who accepts emails from patients so if one of my kids has a cut like that I could email him a pic realy quick and see what he thinks. (he also does the stiches in his office so I wouldn't have to go to the ER unless it was after hours anyway) I've emailed him with all sorts of questions and he's AWESOME at responding very quickly!
Sometimes Mommys DO know best and MOST of the time dr's offices ARE just covering their booties so you can't sue them! :o)

There is a reason I drive 45 minutes to our pediatrician they will come in early and stay late if you need to be seen, they will come in on Sunday's and holidays if you need them so yes if I call and my pediatrician says go to the er we go.

Besides if you call it's noted in your child's file and if you don't follow the drs instructions and something happens to your child you'll have DSS knocking at your door for neglect.

I always get a second opinion with a specialist. For example, they diagnosed my premature baby girl with reflux, I went to see the pediatricgastroenterologist. or when she grew she got a cold and it wasnt going away with the medication the pediatrician gave me, I took her to a pediatric pulmonologist. Some times you just need another doctor to give you a different opinion. About emergency visits. the pediatrician will tell you to go to the ER. but it depends how serious it is follow your ABC's airway breathing circulation, if they can't eat or swallow, due to phlem and there is apossibility of dehydration you need to get fluids right away. You are the mom not the pediatrician. you spend more time with your kids , so you pretty much know whats an emergency and whats not.
hope this helps.

Ok, with my sons's first pediatritian... yes, I listened to EVERYTHING he had to say, if it contradicted what I thought or was feeling I would share it with him and we would go from there. He listened to the PARENTS and changed his reccomendation based on listening to them. With my son's current pedi I am working on building that same relationship (it's still new) but if I am suggested to do something that does not seem possible I will tell him. So, yes I do what he says but I also discuss it with him if that uneasy feeling comes along. I would like to think that if you are with a pedi or any doctor it is because you intend to follow thier instructions and advice.

Yep, I sure do! I did a lot of research prior to selecting my child's pediatrician. I trust them, their years of education, their years of residency and specialty, and their years of experience treating other patients.

What I like best is that I can ask my child's pediatrician *anything*. If I need clarification, if I challenge him, whatever - he will explain things in a way that helps convince me that what we are doing for my child is the right decision.

I'm really confused though...if someone is an EMT and is trained in how to handle emergency situations and ascertain whether or not something constitutes an emergency then why would they be at a loss as to whether they should take their kid to the ER?

Not always. But my kids are very healthy. i am not worried that she loves mashed potatoes or that we eat regular white rice (or Mexican rice) instead of brown. She gets lots of green veggies. My son has a blood disorder and there are a ton of things that are a big no-no according to his specialist. But I let him when he takes precautions. Seriously, he loves loves loves dodge ball. As long as the other kids are not being overly aggressive (which some can be in middle school), we get his meds in and he plays. I am not going to make him sit out. At my daughter's appt, the doc was not too happy she could not peddle her bike really well. Winter does not exactly give the opportunity and I work. Plus her seat was too low. Once I raised that seat, she was off. However, my doc is very open to spacing out vaccines so she does not end up with 4 shots at once so I am happy there.

definitely do not do everything that the dr. says. i have 4 dr's in my ped's office. and every one of them say something different. if it's "off" i take them to the er and see what they say. or get a second opinion.

Without knowing what happened yesterday or reading other answers...NO. All Dr.'s are still humans, they don't know everything and can't possibly know our children like we do. If I am unsure about something I will ask their advice but if I feel differently I have found to follow my gut. My ds has been through lots of Dr's, hospitals etc since he was born and over and over again I find that "Mommy Gut" is usually right. A good doctor will agree with you :)

To simply answer your question...of course not.
My ped. only gets a tiny glimpse of my children and myself. I take her advice w/ a grain of salt. That is to say, I rely heavily on my mama instinct. ;)

I didn't see what happened to Rachel's little boy, but chances are I would have not gone to the ER either. It would have to be pretty serious for me to do that...

Now I gotta go find out what happened!

Absolutely not. I only take my children to the doctor when they are sick and not improving quickly. I think well child visits are actually a mask for "lets pump your kid full of vaccines" visit. So, I don't do well child visits. I have 3 children. My one year old was born at home, was checked out by my midwife for the first six weeks and has never seen a doctor. My 6 year old has not been to the doctor in 4 years and I took my 15 year old a couple of years ago to get some menstrual issues checked out.

Actually Dawn I do not "thumb my nose" at the medical community. I am part of the medical community and I am educated enough in medicine to know when I would need to seek medical care for my children.

I do not do everything the pediatrician says. At all.

I very much appreciate the height/weight percentiles, and I like to know that my kids are hitting their developmental milestones.When they are sick, for the most part, we don't take them in as the doctor will say, "Well, this is going around right now. Take some antibiotics." But many times, the antibiotics are not warranted.

So no. We do not do everything the pediatrician recommends. But it is really nice to know that they are available when you need them.

Well, the medical community already knows the answer to this question....I believe the stats are that 50% of the people don't follow about 50% of the advice given at a doctors office.