Do I Have PPD

B.:

You have really had a tough year! No, I do not believe you have PPD however, you do have some (situational/adjustment disorder) depression going on. It actually sound like your husband is experiencing depression, from the guilt of the accident. You have had a lot on your plate, and you are trying to hold it together for everyone else in the family. I think you should see a councelor to help you cope better, and deal with all the feelings that you are experiencing.

A. L

Dear B.:
I'm suprised that you even have time to sit down at the computer, with all that you have going on! What I would do if I were in your place is get in to see my doctor as soon as possible, because only a professional can diagnose depression. It certainly sounds like you have more than enough on your plate to be depressed and stressed. From your description of your husband's behavior, I'm wondering if he isn't suffering from some kind of reaction to the accident, like post-traumatic stress. Would he be willing to see a doctor about it? Our family has dealt with issues like a house fire, a son's brain cancer, occasional loss of health insurance, my husband's frequent unemployment (construction work), etc., over 28 years, and what always helped me was getting counseling for myself. (My husband would never see a counselor). I think it's really neccessary for we mothers to take care of ourselves first, because that's the only way that we can be a good support to our families. Right now it sounds like you're taking care of everybody and nobody is taking care of you. I don't know what part of the city you live in, but I have gotten good help over the last year at the Wyandotte Center out at 78th and State in Kansas City, Kansas.###-###-####. They have counselors and they also have physicians who can prescribe medication if you need it. Their fees are based on your income, so it's a lot more affordable than seeing a private physician.
Good Luck,
J. H.

See if your employer offers an Employee Assisted Counseling Program. Some employers offer this a free service but limits the amount of times you go.

I know things will get better as you are only handed as much as you can handle. I bet with the weather getting warmer and you can go outside, maybe you can things as a family outside (park, walk, just playing with the kids.

Hang in there! It will all work out in the end! :)

Wow. That's a lot to handle. First, I would say take a deep breath, hold it, then release. Sometimes stopping to take a breathe can help to put stuff in focus. I would say it's a great deal of stress(obviously). I doubt the PPD. Life can be so hard and stressful, believe me I've had my share. I have four kids under 6, full time student, single parent, the whole shebang. Stress sometimes seems to be life than a current state.
But the biggest thing I think to myself is that God never gives us more than we can handle. Even when everything seems horrible, as it does sound, it's nothing we can't handle. Granted much of it is sad and you have my deepest sympathy.
Do you think you could talk to your husband? Let him know no one blames him for the accident. It's something that happened and no one could control it. If he's in a state of self blame there's so much he's missing by letting the guilt overwhelm him. Reassure him, everyone is safe. It didn't turn out bad. The car is wrecked but a car can be replaced. The 3 things that matter made it out fine. Let him know you love him very much and the children do too.
If you can, try to make time for yourself to do something for YOURSELF. It's the biggest stress relief I've found. After the kids and school, I watch a movie and relax, play a game on msn, you can read, take a bubble bath, whatever relax's you. Do it for even 15 mins and see how much it soothes your psyche. A big help for the down feelings is exercise. I love how I feel after popping in a video for 30mins and after awhile you see results so you begin to feel great at how you look.(Something wonderful for having my 5month old son)
Take care of yourself. You can take better care of your children that way and it will help to lighten the burden stress puts upon you. And can help with your marriage, as stress can create a lot of tension too.

You are really going through alot right now. I'm very sorry that you're having these problems. IMO, it seems like there has been several things that have triggered depression, rather than PPD. Personally, I would see a dr. There are so many meds out there that can help, plus sometimes just getting it out helps and a dr. can probably suggest something really good for you. Have you had a heart-to-heart with your husband since Sat? You should talk to him and see if that eleviates any of your stress. Good luck hon!

B.,
Wow! It sounds like you have been through a lot lately. All this chaotic stuff happening would make anyone feel frustrated, stressed, wigged-out, you name it. I would suggest that you dont have PPD or Depression and the reason I say that is that through it all you still try to connect with your husband. this is good. Most likely your stress levels are at an all time high (mine would be). It might be good to talk to someone that could be a sounding board. Some schools give free counseling to students (just a suggestion, as I am a Marriage and Family Therapy soon to be grad.) If possible you might trying talking to your husband about your concerns and brainstorm ideas together about what the other needs.

I hope this helps.

I think you are just stressed by too much going on. Some of it you can't control, but change what you can: QUIT YOUR JOB AND DO NOT GO BACK TO SCHOOL. What are you thinking? That is going to be way too much with a little baby, especially with no sleep. They sleep better when they aren't sick all the time, and they don't get sick as much if they stay home with you.

I'm going to tell you exactly what our preacher told us in church on Sunday. Take a nap. He said that so many moms come to him, exhausted and stressed out, and think they're just the worst mothers on the face of the earth. He tells them that they need to take a nap and become refreshed. Once you've gotten some sleep, the things that are stressing you out, will become more manageable. You said that your kids have been sick, and in my opinion, croup is the worst. You stay up with them all night just to make sure they're breathing. It's the scariest thing my kids have had and my oldest is eleven.
I have three children age 11, 7, and 3. When my 3 year old was 2, I thought I had PPD myself. I'm not sure how late it can show up, but I'd call my OB/GYN to check into it.
You have an awful lot on your plate right now and it sounds like you are just at the end of your rope is all. Regular depression is something else that could have kicked in at this point and is only exacerbated by no sleep. If your OB/GYN doesn't think it's PPD, then talk to your regular doctor. Don't let it get ahead of you. I have so many friends, including myself, that have suffered from depression at one point or time in our lives. Especially after having children. I had to take anti-depressants for 3 months until my chemical imbalance got straightened out and I haven't had to take them since. Sometimes that's all it takes. :o)
As for your husband......you can't make him happy. If all this started after the accident and he hasn't come out of it yet, he needs to go see his doctor or a counselor. If you go to church, he could go speak with your pastor. He needs some help because it sounds like he's depressed as well. That accident may have made him realize how out of control of situations we all are. Just know that he's the only one who can make him happy, not you. Focus on you right now and get you and that baby girl well.
I will pray for your grandpa and your dad. The medical world is so advanced right now, so try not to worry about this until you need to. I know.......easier said than done. :o) I will also pray for you and your children. You have got a lot of responsibility resting on your shoulders right now and I know there are certain things you can't quit doing, but if there is anything in your life that you can put on hold for now, do it. Take a rest. Take a nap. :o)

B.,
I think you've done yourself a great service already by just recognizing that you're at the end of your rope and are asking for help. I definitely think you have a right to vent and feel overwhelmed. You have so much going on in your life right now! When it rains it pours, right? I've been through a similar time in my life when things just went wrong one after the other. I lost 5 family members (grandparents and aunts) within a 10 month period of each other, my parents separated after 23 years of marriage, and I was diagnosed with melanoma my sophomore year of college! Believe me, I thought a time or two what the heck was going on? Did someone switch me bodies with another person who has terrible luck? I felt like I had done something wrong to deserve all of it and I even doubted my commitment to God! But you know, in the end He pulled me through it. I had a few dear friends that I really relied on to talk to and get things off my chest. I think you've done good for yourself just by getting on here and verbalizing your problems. Sometimes doing just that can really make a big difference in your perspective of the problems. I know you've got so many things going on, none of which are insignificant. I think it might help you to talk with a professional about your situation and seek guidance, a doctor or counselor. I don't know where you live but my church (First Baptist of Raytown) offers counseling services for free, and my old church up north (Antioch Bible Baptist) has many great counselors there too. Good luck, and please email me if you want to talk or vent again--I'm a good listener :) ____@____.com

When it rains it pours huh? I feel badly for you, it seems like the junk hit the fan all at once. There are 2 basic types of depression: clinical and situational. Clinical is when you have a chamical imbalance and you need to take meds to "make you right" for lack of a better term. Situational is pretty self-explanatory... situations in your life make you depressed. Talk to somebody. Go see a doctor. No matter what they will probably put you on meds. If it's situational it will be temporary. There are other things you can do to help without taking medications, like changing your diet and stuff. Make sure you at least talk to a counselor. They can give you tools to help you. It sounds like your husband needs one as well and it might be good for both fo you to see somebody together. Don't fret! You might be bale to find one person for all of it. If not then you might just need to find 2 counselors, 1 for you and 1 for your husband.
I've been through depression and it sucks. But with work and hope I've gotten through it. You and your children deserve to be happy. Talk to somebody... it'll probably be one of the best things you can do.

You could have PPD, but I think you're just reacting naturally to a really really difficult few months. I think your husband really should get some therapy, it sounds like he's having some real problems b/c of the accident. Maybe you should see a therapist too, since you have so much to deal with right now. And maybe it's the right thing to do, but it seems like going back to school right now is adding another huge thing to an already way-overloaded schedule/life. You need to take care of yourself. I wish for the best for you- keep us posted!
-A.

Oh my gosh! Sweetie, with everything going on in your life no wonder you're stressed out! And your husband isn't helping matters, but the truth is that he's probably stressed out too and doesn't know how to deal with it. I don't know what kind of relationship you have, but you might try talking to him honestly about how you're feeling--not fighting with him, but just telling him you need to talk and just let him know how overwhelmed you are with everything going on in your life. Tell him you need to see a doctor, and be honest about everything you're going through emotionally. Between the two of you, hopefully you can find a way to work through all of these hurdles together. I know it seems like everything just keeps piling on, and it does seem to happen like that a lot, but this too shall pass. It really will, even though it doesn't seem like it now. Try to focus on the positives in your life instead of everything that's going wrong. I hope everything works out for you. Keep your chin up.

B., If I were you I would definately go see your doctor. Yes you are under a lot of stress from the sounds of things and this stress can trigger PPD as well as regular depression. Trust me, niether are fun and both should be taken seriously. Once you let your doctor know what is going on he or she can inform you of different ways to deal with your feelings. For instance, seeing a counselor, medication, or both. Let me tell you my story. I was pregnant when I was diagnosed with PPD, yes you can get it even before the baby is born, I ended up in a stage where all I wanted to do was sleep and not have to deal with anything. I started eating less, giving my other two children less attention, crying, and could not even get up to take a shower. Finally, I realised what was going on and told my doctor. He quickly got me into counseling and started me on medication. Even though the problems causing my depression were still there, I soon got better. With the help of talking to someone and the medication I was soon able to be happy and spend time with my family and friends.

I feel for you!!! I can't tell you if you have PPD but sounds like you need a lot of support that you are lacking and some boosters. Have you tried talking to any of your family about it? (Even with your family with health issues.) Talk to your friends too. I don't know if you're religious or not but I pray sometimes and it helps me. I don't go to church or read the bible even but praying does help. Sounds like you don't have a lot of time like me but exercise really halps with your mood. Also, you could see a couselor for a short period of time until everything smoothes out.
Hope I helped at least a little bit.
-H.

B.,

I really feel for you. It sounds like you've been taking a beating by life, and it won't let up. It seems to me like it might be a combination of all the things. Not necesarily PPD, but your hormons trying to get back to "normal" does take a toll on your mood, and with everything else that has happened, your emotions over health issues in your family, your recent loss, the accident...it's just everything snowballing. I would suggest you talk to your husband and let him know that your don't blame him for the accident, as he may be distant because he is is blaming himself, and playing the "what if" game in his mind about all the things that could have happened. Reassure him that you love him, and that everything will be alright. Then, let him know that you need reassured. That this is a hard time in your life with everything that is going on, and that you need to work together as a team, and that you will get through this together. I will be keeping you in my prayers. Take care of yourself, and God bless. Send me a message if you like, I am more than happy to be a listening ear if you ever need someone to talk to.