Desperate Help Needed!!! - Houston,TX

I agree with the others let him cry for a few mins.I had 5 including a set of twins.When they where babies one slept all night the other wanted to be picked up in the middle of the night and would only sleep if she slept on her dad's chest.I caught on and realized she needed sound.So I played the radio at nighht for her.It worked but now at 11 she's hooked

D... man have I been there.. I was told by a very good friend with lots of kids to go buy the cheapest, LOUDEST box fan that I could find. I did, and even on the lowest level, my son slept through the night. It drownds out my dogs, the A/C, cars driving by etc. I take this fan everywhere, including hotel rooms, and he sleeps like a "baby". He is now 2. With the fan on high setting he even slept through this years fireworks! WOW! Hope that this helps.. nothing to me like the white noise of a fan to keep that baby sleeping! Good luck!

Please consider reading this book "On Becoming Baby Wise". I know all the bookstores have it for about $10. I think the library should have it too. I've used it and was successful. It was referred to me by my girlfriends and they have used it and also worked for them. It is truly easy reading and the book is not so thick. I know the least you need is to stay up on your free time to read a book but it's so worth it. Good luck.

One thing that comes to mind is how you respond when he wakes up. If you pick him up then he might think it is play time. Change his diaper, turn him over and pat his back for a few min. The more interaction you have, the more he will be alert for more. Keep lights low, soft music, Offer water in a bottle for thirst. You may have to do without a daytime nap as well. If he takes 3 small naps a day, give him a good one in the am and a short one in the pm.
Develop a good bedtime routine that you learn to stick to. At 730 pm, give bath, then read story, snuggle time and then to bed. It may require you letting him cry it out for a few nights before he will be doing this like a champ.

Good luck, C.

I know it's really hard but maybe you should let him cry it out for a night or two. We had to do that with our youngest daughter who is now 18 mos. old and she now sleeps better than her sister who is two! If you're sure that he's not cutting teeth than I would give it a try....

DOes he take lots of naps in the day or a late nape in the evening? If so try keeping him awake and play with him alot ( you know try to wear him out). Hope this helps but if not you may want to speak to your DR. GOOD LUCK

My oldest STILL wakes up middle of the night (not every night) - she's 5, though now she just comes into my room crawls into my bed and is fast to sleep. By the looks of her bed in the morning, I think she gets cold.

Her baby sister (2 1/2) sleeps better than my first. I've made sure she's dressed warmly enough that when she kicks off the blanket she'll stay warm and that helps. This one had a phase from 1yr to about 2yr that she woke up every night. I do think they go thru phases.

A lot of people frown on it, but as a working mom, I had to do what I had to do to get the kids to sleep. If that meant sleeping in the recliner with them resting on my chest, that's what I did; however, I'm a believer in co-sharing the bed for sanity sake.

Parenthood is a crapshoot... good luck!

I would agree with one of the other posts that said it all depends on how you're handling the situation when he wakes up. I would let him cry for at least 5 minutes (10 if you can) to see if he can put himself back to sleep. If you go right in there, it may wake him up even more. And, as she also mentioned, if you do have to go into his room, keep the lights down and use a very hushed voice. Give him a pat on the back and tell him to go back to sleep (or night night or whatever phrase you use). You may have to let him cry for a few nights before he gets the idea, but I think at this age, one of the biggest reasons they still wake up is habit. They are used to the interaction at night, so they get up for it. If you remove that stimulation, he will learn to continue sleeping. Let me know if you want more specific info. My daughter's pediatrician when she was born (before we moved) was awesome and gave the best advice. I would be happy to share more with you.

Good luck! I promise, it won't hurt him to cry for a few minutes....it teaches him how to get back to bed on his own.

V.

Hi, I am mother of 3 girls 12, 9, and 2 and I also had a late sleep-through-the-night baby with my 2 year old. It took her up until about 8 months old to make it a few nights through, but it does happen. Being tired with a small infant is really bad because it can cause anger and frustration towards the child even though we all know it's not thier fault in any way what so ever. You have to get some sleep. First, I would ask what type of daycare do you have? If it's you then you can be making sure that your baby is getting 2 small naps a day and not sleeping through the day, if it's public care they have state rules about naps and I'm sure they are not letting the baby sleep all day, but if you have private care I would really suggest that your baby is sleeping too much in the day time. You can look for good advise about how much day sleep the baby needs at his age on babycenter.com I reaaly don't remember anymore. Also you can try a noise cancellation device like a box fan or air purifier, something that makes noise in the room the baby sleeps in. After that I would talk to your Dr. to make sure everything you are doing is what they recommend. good luck and don't forget even though your not sleeping now there is light at the end of the tunnel, all children sleep through the night at some point.

Where does your son sleep? What does he do when he wakes up(ie: cry, play..)? There are a few reasons why he wakes up, for example, if he sleeps in a crib there could be something bothering him. If he naps late in the day he may not be sleepy. does he sleep a great deal during the day? What time is he going to bed at night? You might want to play some soft classical music in his room while he is sleeping. When he wakes up, as long as he isn't crying leave him in his crib so that he will learn to comfort himself and eventually go back to sleep. If he has always done this then it could just be a habit that you will have to break. It will not be easy and will take patience but it will work. When he wakes up do not get him out of his bed, rub and pat his back while in a soothing voice tell him he is okay. do this about every 5 minutes initially. As the days progress lengthen the time lets say every 10 minutes and so on...until he learns to comfort himself. Make sure he not napping late in the evening.I know that it will be hard in the begining, my son used to do the same thing . Good Luck

Do you need to be a little more patient? Yep. Was I? No. 8 months seems to be the magic age of not sleeping well. I just had someone else say the same thing about their 8 month old. You could do what I did and just bring them to bed with you. Only do that if you are cool with it and have a King sized bed. Also, if you are prepared for them to sleep with you unitl they are 4. I personally loved it. My kids always started in their own beds but ended up with mommy and daddy. I decided it was better for me to get sleep then to stay up all night trying to get them back to sleep. I think with rest, I'm a better mom and wife. Sharing a bed was something that I thought was ridiculous before I had children.

HOWEVER, most people are not into bedsharing. Here's another tip that a friend of mine does. Your baby is dealing with seperation anxiety. During his awake time practice leaving the room while he's in something that he can't get out of. Talk as you slowly make you exit. Keep talking to him while you are out of sight. This let's him know that Mommy is still around even when he can't see you. Once you are completly out of vision tell him that you are going to go to the kitchen and will be right back. When you come back go in where he can see you. Little practices like these will eventually help to eliminate this fear. I wish I had known this technique when my babies were, well, babies. It will take time but eventually he'll start sleeping thru the night.

When you go into his room at night. Don't talk, don't change diapers or anything like that. Keep it strictly business. Just go in and pat his back for a bit and then begin your exit.

Also be REALLY careful with the whole crying it out bit. He could have an ear infection and when he lays down it hurts. Do you find that he sleeps better in a swing or sleeps fine in his car seat? If he's sleeping well when at an incline I would have his ears checked. I have a friend who was letting her baby cry it out. He had tubes in his ears so she knew that if there was an infection there would be drainage. Turns out the tubes had fallen out and she did not know. He poor baby was crying in pain at night and his mommy did not come to comfort him! Not because she was a bad mommy but because she was given poor advise. There were no signs of an ear infection during the day, only that he cried at night. Her poor baby has suffered some minor hearing loss causing delayed speech.
Another medical reason a baby may cry when reclined is because of reflux. (sorry this is so long) Sometimes a baby can have reflux but never with the visible spitup. When they are laying down at night the acid comes up and burns in their chest. Just some things to look into.

D. - great book called "BabyWise" and another called "Solving your child's sleep problems (at any age)". Did both and they worked. Don't let anyone tell you that all children sleep through the night at 8 months - that is not true. Every child is different. My son, now 2, didn't sleep through the night CONSISTENTLY until he was about 18 months. Best to you.

I have 7 month old twin boys who have been sleeping through the night since they were about 4 months old. This is when I started giving them a bottle with rice cereal at night before bed. At first they would wake once and I would again give them a bottle with rice cereal. Eventually, though, they stopped waking at all but wanted a bigger feeding before bed as their last feeding til morning. This has seemed to work for me along with limiting their long naps during the day. I lay them down in an open area where there is some noise so that they don't take extremely long naps during the day. My husband says they take "catnaps". This also seems to ensure that they have uninterrupted sound sleep in their crib through the night. And mommy gets sound sleep now too. I have always said that I can handle almost anything on a good night's sleep, but it's when I don't get sleep that twins and a 4 yr old can sometimes be a bit much to handle. Hope this helps...

After I would give my son a bath I would take him for a stroller ride in the evening or on my bicycle & for some un-known reason, the outside air tired him out ! you may want to try and evening walk ! & try the gas medicine too ! that always helped mine also.
Good Luck ! ~

We had a simailar issue with our now 5 year old daughter. I read and used almost religously a book called "Healthy Sleep Habbits, Happy Child (or Baby)" I would give you my copy but I gave it to my sister. It was very helpful. It has many methods, you find the one that works for you. We did the cry herself to sleep method after trying many others, and after a week or so of a lot of crying from her and me, she started sleeping through the night, taking better naps and just being a much happier, easy going baby. It was really hard but I would do it again.
Best of Luck!

I disagree with the tactic of letting them cry it out.

I'm sorry, but I am the kind that wants to make sure they know I am there. Kids cry for a reason, and wanting to feel you close is a good one.

when my kids cried, I held them close to my heart.. and just made shhhh shh sounds.. or sang a very low tone song.. something that can calm them..

Notice doing something different every night, and see what works.. but sometimes it's just that they miss having mommy near by.

Ifyou think it's the food, don't feed them acidic things at least 4 to 5 hours before bed time. and if you think it might be the gas, try not to give him milk, or dairy products before bedtime, etc. Try giving him water, and letting sit up most of the time.

When my kids cried.. Most of the times, ended up sleeping with me, and that was the best thing for me. As a mother, I felt good that they calmed down, and eventually they grow out of it.

Good luck, and do what your heart tells you,

C.

I used the advice pediatrician Dr. Weissbluth gave in his book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child", and it worked to get my son to sleep through the night. His basic idea: get the kid to bed early, and soon "sleep will beget sleep." In other words, our kids are over-tired because they go to bed too late. Try putting him down earlier (I used to put my son down at 6-6:30pm at 8 months), and he will soon be sleeping through the night. It might be a fight at first, but he'll get the hang of it.

D.,

I would suggest that you maybe play some classical music for him. This is another form of noise some of the other moms were talking about, but it also helps your mind to become more open to learning.

I have a 16 mo old and he is now learning to go to sleep without being rocked. It is VERY difficult to hear your precious child cry, but a tired mommy doesn't usually make a good mommy.

I too used to think that to let my son sit in his room and cry was horrible, but now I am realizing that this is a childs way of controlling their environment. As a mother you should be able to tell whether your child is crying due to needing something or just because everyone else is asleep and they are not.

The first time he wakes up, try changing his diaper....don't say anything to him.....kiss him on the cheek, maybe rock him for a min and then place him back in his crib. If this continues throughout the night do the same thing but take away the rocking part after the diaper change. Each time take something out, and by the final time, don't even go in there.

There are some nights when my son wakes up and I go and change his diaper and he just wants to play.....I have to turn the monitor down in my room and I let him cry himself back to sleep. I turn the monitor on once he is back asleep.

Just remember, it is all personal preference. And also, no child has ever died from crying....I have seen this saying in many places, including my dr's office!

Good luck!

Hi D..
Just be patient. I have a 15 month old daughter and she wakes up thru out the night also. I thought she should be sleeping thru the night too. Then i thought it was beside of her size. (she weights 18 pounds) but I learned that all kids are different. some nights are better when she sleep all night but with her she have the feel you close and be under you. So just be patient. It gets better.

From all of the Super Nannies and caregiver and from my own experience, if he's crying for you to come in to get him, LET HIM CRY.
This sounds harsh, but he will grow out of it.
I believe the first time, you go in and console him to let him know you are there, pick him up, hug and love on him, but place him back into his bed.(He will probably cry again).
Wait awhile before going back in, this time only hug him - do not take him out of the bed, lay him back down to sleep. Leave the room. (He will probably throw a fit, but do not go back).
For the last go around...if he crys again, go to the door of the room, but do not go in. You may speak to him, but do not console him in any other way. Go back to your room.
As the week progresses, back off the number of times you go to his room. This process may have to be repeated several times before your son realizes that he'll be okay w/o you coming into the room. He will eventually stay asleep.

I am sorry to hear you are having problems, but I COMPLETELY understand. I have a 3 year old that just started sleeping through the night about a year ago and an 18 month old that still doesn't. He wakes up several times a night. He doesn't just cry... he screams. The boys sleep with Dad and I in our king size bed so it isn't separation anxiety. We can't just let him cry it out either. He still cries for a bottle in the night. He WILL NOT give it up. He takes sippy cups in the daytime, but he has to have the bottle in the night. It is like he is starving to death when I know he isn't. He weighs 26 pounds. Some nights when it is particularly bad I go sleep on the couch with him on my chest and he goes straight to sleep and doesn't wake up. I am sure that he is just spoiled but it is hard to break him at this point. Good luck!!