Depression - Malden,MA

Hi S.,
I don't know if this will help but I have two children ages 3 and 6 months. My son was two weeks late, I never had a contraction, and as he was approaching 10 lbs, I had a c-section. My daughter was a scheduled c-section because of the dangers of v-back after c, plus I had gestational diabetes and pre-eclampsia. However at 37 weeks, and two days before the scheduled section (early because of the conditions I mentioned) my water broke (no contractions) and then I had another c-section. All I can think of is what women would have done a hundred years ago to have a procedure like a c-section available. Chances are their lives and those of their children would have been gravely in danger. I'm just thankful that medicine has given me the opportunity to be a mom to two incredible kids even though my body didn't want to cooperate. I hope that maybe this different perspective might allay your feelings of self-hatred and know that being able to be a great mother now is the best outcome of all.

Hi S.,

I went through the exact same thing!! Even the jealousy issues! I just had to go see a psychologist! because I thought it was post partem depression! Which of course it wasn't! I just had to tell everyone what I was feeling and everyone did what they could to make me feel better! Not everyone has a perfect delivery and we shouldn't put ourselves through that expectation!! Just think of it like this if you had had a natural delivery she may not have survived the delivery!1 THat is how I looked at it because my son had his chord wrapped around himself and his neck acouple of times!!! Anyway I hope I was of some help and if you need to talk to me just send me a message!! I hope you start feeling better!
Becca

you sound like a classic ppd case! Call your dr and talk to him.. having a c section doesn't make you any less of a mom.. you have battle scars now to PROVE you are a mom! It doesn't mean you are a bad mom, it just means your baby got here safe, and sound without complication and you should just enjoy your baby.. I know it is disappointing when things don't go the way you wanted ( I was a bfeeding drop out!), but the important thing is, your baby got here safely... Try not to be jealous , who knows, maybe next time you can have that vbac and you'll feel better, but it really isn't important HOW the baby got here, just that they got here. good luck

My daughter also came late (almost 2.5 weeks!) and so I was induced also. I didn't end up having a C-section, but pretty much everything that I had hoped for with regards to delivery was thrown out the window. I also felt like there was something wrong with me and felt like I missed out, never having the contractions on my own and never getting to tell my husband that "I think its time." I definately felt some grief over the loss of my expectations and maybe some jealousy that other womens' bodies didn't let them down in the way I felt mine did. I try not to worry about it anymore. Hopefully the next time I have a baby it will go differently, but if not I will still have a beautiful healthy baby (and thats what really matters, right?). :)