A couple of months ago my husband and I decided to switch our kids to another daycare. We have been feeling that the level of education at our current place had been going downhill for about a year. We kept giving chance after chance and finally decided to go for it. We had been hearing from an old teacher that the director was doing some shady things and spying on old employees etc. so to avoid the questions and confrontation we told them that I was being laid off of work. The Monday that we started the new daycare we were being told by one of our new teachers (she used to work at our old center) that she was getting text messages from the old place asking if our kids were there. She ignored them even though she was being texted daily, then yesterday the director of the old place called me at work (OK, yeah, I got busted) and harrassed me about lieing to her and asking me if we were persuaded to go elsewhere and that she knew my kids were at a new center. This to me is creepy! And this may be a total coincidence but my husbands vehicle was covered in silly string this morning! It would be one thing if some kids were out being crazy and got every car on the block but our car was the only one. What do I do?? It is none of their business and I don't know if I should just wait and see now if things stop. They got the info they needed and got it out of their system?? This is something I never expected to have to deal with, any advice would be helpfull. Thank you.
You're being stalked by the previous daycare provider! Along with the past employees getting stalked and being asked to aid!
This IS illegal. Report it. Texts and phone calls can certainly be evidence.
All righty then. I'm surprised that you didn't just tell them when you left exactly why you were leaving, but I get it... you're non-confrontational. But I'm the sort of person who believes that lies only cause problems and and just plain old make you look bad.
Don't contact them back or respond to them in any way. No e-mail, no returned calls, nothing in writing. Ignore them. What they're doing now is harassment and if you engage them they'll escalate. And what they're doing is illegal and you can call the police. It doesn't matter that you were caught lying for your reasons on leaving the old daycare. You had every right to leave and not tell them. File a police report about being harassed at work and report the silly string on your husband's car as well. That stuff can be damaging to the car's paint job and if you notice any damage and police can trace it back to the crazy lady, then she'll be on the hook for the cost.
The new daycare person or whoever it is that's getting all of those daily texts? Yeah, she needs to keep every single text, not reply to any of them, and call the police as well and show them the texts and any other messages they're leaving on voicemail. If they're calling and she answers she needs to document the phone calls.
I would take a picture of it, and document what is currently happening. I would be FURIOUS! It is really none of the old centers business what you do with your children. It's poor business practice!
No offense either, but by law, aren't they supposed to keep the list of children in their care CONFIDENTIAL??? Your current daycare shouldn't have released that information, and I would be ticked at them for doing that. It's a safety issue, and it's wrong.
Ask your current provider to respect privacy. keep track of the chain of events. If the old daycare persists you need to report them.
If I were you I would be extremely careful with these people, and keep communication professional, but minimal.
You do not owe them any explanations about your decision-making process or what is going on with your family.
I would not do anything to antagonize them for fear they would "report" you for something ridiculous. But I also would not give them any extra information.
It is scary that your children were in the care of someone (even if only in a supervisory role) who would behave this way.
JMO.
You do not have to explain yourself, and by doing to, you are telling them they have that power over you. This behavior is extremely unprofessional, inappropriate and CREEPY! I would be very firm that you expect all phone calls to stop, including those to your chilren's current care giver. If it doesn't send a certified letter lining out the behavior and telling them it is an official demand to stop, and that especially them checking where your kids are now is harrasing and stalking behavior. Tell them that you will contact whatever appropriate authorities if it does not stop immediately, and DO!
I would start w/ filing a complaint w/ your state's family services, which should be the agency that regulates child care centers.
We had the same initial problem, but I was very clear why we were leaving, and they would have had hell to pay if they stalked be afterwards!
Dear B.,
1. I would be grateful not to be in the old place.
2.If this person is in charge of your children's education, you made the right decision. I would move on and not interact with this person. It is your right to change places.
3. As for the current person, I would just tell her once not to pass information about you to other people. Period. It is no one's business. After that, just leave it. If she mentions it, you can ask her to respect your privacy and am sure that is a value she upholds as well.
GL. HTH. Jilly
You need to report them to the state. They are breaking privacy laws and harassing you. Even if you had a contract stipulating that you had to give them notice, they have no right to know where you took your kids, and no right to harass that other day care provider.
I think I would be calling the old provider and giving her a piece of my mine. It is none of her business as to why you left or where your children are now. That is really childish of her to be acting this way and I would let others know how she is acting. As far as the new techer receiving the text messages I would be calling the police to see if I could get them to stop. Send text after text can be harassment and needs to stop. You did nothing wrong and it was the right thing for the new provider to ignore the messages.
I agree with everyone else - this is crazy inappropriate & I am glad your kids are not at that center any more! I would also not respond directly to Crazy Director in any way. You'll just get pulled in to the crazy & clearly she is capable of lying outright & turning it around on you. However, in addition to contacting the police & the agency that regulates child care in your state, if the center is part of a "chain," I would contact the parent company as well.
If she calls again, lay down the law.
"What I do with my children is my business. Do not call or contact me again." Then hang up. Chances are she got all of the crazy out of her system and is done now.
if it continues go get a restraining order-doesnt matter why,when,or how you left-you left-they have no right to cross boundaries and invade your privacey.is there someone over her head you can call??..i had an old boss do that to me-it was insane and real creepy-i ended up calling her big bosses..really makes you wonder what kind of hell your kids went thru in this place huh??..creepy...good luck
