I am also dealing with this with my 9 year old. Our pediatrician just gave me this suggestions yesterday. 1) Try surgical steel, if the problem doesn't clear up within a couple days she may just be sensitive to everything, but you don't have to give up just yet! 2) Get earrings that are higher grade metals - titanium, 18k gold, sterling silver, and the surgical steel - then change her earrings every day rotating from one type of metal to another. Make sure her ears are getting cleaned every day and that earrings are always cleaned before use. She said that she used this process on her own daughter and it took at least 6 months before her daughter's ears were completely healed (no more redness or seeping), but she still can't wear the same pair of earrings for days at a time.
Also, on another note, I have extremely sensitive skin and neosporin is the worst product I could use. I was using it on a simple cut and the area around it turned red and inflamed, the cut started seeping this clear fluid, and it itched like mad! My doctor told me that there wasn't an infection, but that most people with sensitive skin can't handle antibiotic creams that have more than one antibiotic in them (like neosporin). The solution is to use something that bacitracin, or bactroban - anything that only has one antibiotic in it. For some reason the combined antibiotics can be to harsh and irritate the skin enough that it simulates infection. I just thought that information might be useful!
I'd love to hear what you find to actually work for your daughter!