Daughter Going off to College in the Fall...

My friends son said he was "home sick" from college when he came home for Christmas break. How quickly they adjust😉. I think it is a bigger adjustment for the parents. It is easier to be the one going off than the ones left behind.

Our daughter was over 2000 miles away for college.She said she was surprised that you do not have to go to class every day. No one chases after you, You just have to be motivated,

She was shocked that there is no such thing as a "snow day" up there.

I learned that I could survive without a phone call at least once a day from her.. I was able to go a few days at a time and then a week at a time.
I was super surprised, how much money we saved without our daughter home. She had a small amount sent to her each month and actually saved money each school year, because she did not spend it all.

We were able to put down a substantial down payment for a brand new car, the first summer after she had been at college!

Your child is going to do great and have a good experience.

My daughter heads out this fall. She's excited, I'm excited for her.

She's only going to be about 1/2 hr away. I got tickled when she broke the news that she won't be coming home every weekend!!

I hope she has a fantastic time at college. We have bets on how soon shell come back to her bed, her shower, her space. It's going to be tough going from having an entire upstairs at appx 2000 sf to yourself to an 8 x 12 bedroom and sharing bathroom and living area with 2 other girls!!

Thank goodness the girls are all good friends from high school.

I look forward to updates on this post in the fall!!

ETA: @ Laurie... I am doing better with heading to bed when she's out, etc. I know once she moves my daily interaction will lesson and I dread that... At the same time... I am so happy she'll finally be able to make her own decisions and control her schedule! Thanks for yor input!!

Daughter #2 takes off for college 5-1/2 hours away this fall. The biggest lesson for her will be realizing just exactly how inconvenient that distance is from home...not exactly easy to drive home anytime she wants for a visit. She's very excited though so I'm excited for her.

With daughter #1 (as it will be also for #2) biggest lesson (but not necessarily a hard one) was learning to make decisions for herself and actually think like an adult.

Congrats on the milestone of moving a child onto college!

My son is a sophomore and my daughter will be a freshman. She leaves Monday.
Biggest lesson - they finally seem to understand all those things we were trying to teach them. In other words, Mama was right. :)
2nd biggest lesson - some parents just can't let go. We dropped our son at VMI, got him settled, saw him march off with his company, and headed for the car. Many of the other parents headed towards barracks to see their kids start the tradition that is the Rat Line. There were parents climbing the gate. How incredibly embarrassing for those kids! Please... You have trained them, nurtured them, and coddled them long enough. Now it is time for them to experience this extraordinary opportunity they have chosen for themselves.
3rd lesson - after a while, they do call home more frequently and they will ask for advice AND they will thoughtfully consider what you have to say.
4th lesson - they still love to come home. They will consider passing up a trip to Hawaii to come home. Don't let them. They need to take advantage of every opportunity! Home will always be here, but a free trip to Hawaii, NY, FL, or New Orleans only comes around once in a lifetime! Oh and when they come home, they don't come home alone. :)
5th lesson - they learn that laundry is forever.
6th lesson - they know how to do laundry, but they all promptly forget how once they walk through the front door. :)

My son leaned that the time management he mastered in high school was an extremely valuable skill. He learned where to study, where to get help, and that it is okay to have tutors. With a tutor comes an A in Calculus.

He learned that kids do stupid things and he had to decide if he would participate or not. He has a lot to lose - so the burden is heavy. So far he has decided to not be stupid.

He has learned that his is capable of many things he never thought he would be able to do. He was never an athlete, but he can keep up with his classmates. He can do a gazillion push-ups and not break a sweat. He can live in a room with 5 other people. He can take a shower in 5 min. or less. He can be ready for parade in 3 minutes even if he has to change clothes.

He has learned that his VMI friends will have his back forever. And that is the best lesson of all. He has great friends. He has great memories.

I'm ready for my daughter to head out on Monday. I look forward to the emails, the stories, and the many extra kids walking through my front door.

I learned I did a good job in parenting him by having rules and standards. I learned that it doesn't matter how good a job I did, he made mistakes.

He learned that his parents are pretty cool, that a lot of other kids are spoiled by their parents - they think the laundry does itself, the trash and recycling take themselves out, and that no one cleans the bathroom if parents aren't there.

They learn - through observation and often through bad experiences, that they can't handle alcohol and that drunk people aren't pretty. They learn that the workload is huge, that everyone there is roughly the same caliber student that they are, and that even the straight A students in high school don't get straight As in college. They learn that if they stay up too late, they skip class, the professor doesn't take attendance, and there are no repercussions. Until the mid-term when they are completely unprepared. They learn that Mom doesn't write an absence note if they can't get up for class because they are too tired or too hungover. They learn that professors have seen and heard it all, and they aren't impressed.

They learn to manage their time and stay on top of the work, or they pay the price.

They are often blown away by the fact that they have to pay for textbooks.

They learn what it's like to live in a small room without a fully applianced kitchen, a family room, a basement hangout, and a laundry room with a parent in it.

They learn that fraternities are very tempting in some schools, but that partying is a painful lifestyle.

They learn to interact with kids from all countries and religions - that's awesome.

Parents learn that they have no say and no control, except for the finances. The college will not call you when your kid is failing, skipping class, picked up for being drunk, or in the infirmary.

They learn to live on a budget.

Everybody learns to let go, and to appreciate the other one.

My daughter just finished her second year at college and is taking online classes and continuing to work this summer. She has had fun, pretty uneventful because I let her make decisions and test things out when she was much younger. Fun times for sure!!

I have two college graduates, one with an MBA. They both did surprising things their first year at college - one converted from Unitarianism to Islam and finished his undergrad degree in Saudi Arabia, and the other paid for her entire first two years of school + living expenses by working as an exotic dancer 3 nights a week for 8 months. Obviously neither of those choices was made at our encouragement.

But, they are now both married with lovely children of their own and fine lives. So, whatever your daughter may choose, take a deep breath and let her live her life. That was the lesson I learned.

Well talking for myself when I went away to college in a different State across the ocean:
I was surprised, at the amount of partying.... the kids did.
And the degree, to which they did this.
And the promiscuity.
I know, you probably don't want to know that, but that is what was going on when I was a Freshmen.
And it was, shocking.
Even if I did not grow up in a bubble.
Kids, of all types. From all backgrounds.