Cultural Differences and Dealing with Baby's Health Issues

Coming from a Latin family myself; I know it's frustrating to get two different sets of advice. I agree with the doctor, a runny nose does need medicine for now. Since it's viral, you have to wait for it go away on its own. Since Luna just started day care, it's common that she will be sick (many times) between now and then; her immune system will get stronger though and it'll get better, trust me. You just have to ride the wave for now, it's easier said than done, I know.

Well I am not Latin but I am married to a man who was not born and raised in America, so I do understand cultural differences.

However, I do not see this as a cultural problem. The fact is that decongestants, cough suppressents/expectorants, anti-diarrheals, can be dangerous and life threatening in children under 6.

Over the counter cold remedies for babies and toddlers have been taken off the shelves recently because of misuse from parents. Parents were not giving the correct doses and babies died. The American Academy of Pediatrics states that cold remedies are useless in young children anyway, so don't even bother to put them at risk.

If you are looking for prescription meds to be given to your child, well I am afraid that you just are not going to get any for a simple virus. Viruses need to run their course.

They are miserable, frustrating and sometimes dangerous seeing as though one put my baby in the ICU when he was 2 months old, but that is just a fact in the life of a baby/toddler.

Large daycare settings are notorious for illness and germs. There really isn't much you can do about it except to leave. The larger the daycare the stronger and more prevalent the germs. Try and find a smaller daycare or a private babysitter. And if she caught this while travelling - well that is to be expected. It is almost a 100% guarantee that kids will catch something while travelling. They are exposed to more people, more germs, their schedule is off creating stress which weakens the immune system. Diets are not always the healthiest causing immune to weaken. Kids get sick when they travel.

In the meantime, when your baby is sick there are many things you can do at home to help alleviate the risk and discomfort.

1. Use a cool mist humidifier at night. I do this along with a vick's vapor strip. Wonderful!

2. Vick's vapor rub on chest. Some say feet for a cough, but that didn't work for me.

3. For diarrhea, keep her hydrated by any means possible. Dehaydration from diarrhea is life threatening. Popsicles, canned fruit syrup, pedialyte, whatever she will drink let her. I also give my kids acidopholus for diarrhea but I don't know that you daughter would be old enough to chew a tablet.

4. If she has a fever or in any pain, tylenol is great. Just make sure you give her the proper dose.

5. Saline nose drops will help dry out the drippy runny nose as well as loosen the mucus enough so you can suck it out with a nose syringe.

6. Get her plenty of sleep. Sleep helps build the immune system. She needs to sleep for an average of 12 hours at nights plus 1-2 naps in the day.

7. Healthy food. Fruits and veggies and healthy proteins & carbs help the body's immune system as well. Make sure she takes a multivitamin if she is a picky eater. Your ped. can prescribe a good one.

Colds/viruses/stomach bugs are all a part of childhood. Albeit an unpleasant one, but important in building up her immune system. Believe it or not, but each cold/virus that her body fights only makes her that much stronger.

I trust American doctors and the American Academy of Pediatrics. Heed their advice. Your in-laws mean well but they are not the experts. Trust your gut, do your own research. Don't jeopardize your precious daughter's well being because of their opinions.

My best to you and your family.
A.

Hi. I'm not Latin, and don't understand the cultural differences. However, you have to let a virus run it's course. Just like a cold. Although I wouldn't let her be sick for more then two days with diarrhea. For that there is medication a doctor can give her. She could have the ROTO virus which can turn serious quickly. Diarrhea can be very serious if let go for too long. Make sure she's getting plenty of fluids. As for the colds from daycare, I have read it is normal to have 8 colds per year. Sounds excessive, but I guess it isn't. Especially in daycare.

Well...
People need to understand the difference between virus and bacteria...
Generally all you can do with a virus is take tylenol and wait for it to run it's course...
And when you are just getting over one, you are not strong and will be a great host for hte next one.
She is catching an awful lot in a row....but will have a great imuunity system once she is healthy.
So...
YOu are doing fine...
If they feel an antiviral will help shorten the life of a virus to keep her from being too run down...You may have to go with it but children are far more capable of handling fevers than adults....most doctors will let her ride it out.

C.:

I am latina and the best thing I can tell is that we all think differently. Follow your instinct and do things that make sense to you also listen to your dr even though dr can make mistakes. Not giving medicine to a baby when is needed is negligent but giving medicine that she doesn't need is not good either. When my daughter was 2 mo I took her to PR and stayed there for 2 months, during our stay she got sick and I inmediately took her to the dr, the pediatric ER as we had no dr there she had a very bad chest congestion, they tested her for RSV, which was fine by me, but when it came back negative, they precribed proventil (something to open up her brochial tubes) this didn't make sense to me so I didn't give it to her. I thought this medicine was pretty strong and she is too young for it. Next day I found a pediatric pneumologist and he checked her her lungs were clear and her congestion was in the upper chest no need to give her anything he said to just ride out, just use a vaporizer. My instinct guided me right, when I came back I took her to regular ped again and he said the exact same thing so my instinct guided me correctly. If you see she is sick take her to the dr and ask, ask, and ask questions until you understand and whatever it is makes sense to you if your gut tells you something is wrong keep looking. My mom always yells at me to take her to the dr and get prescription medicine, my mother in law is always telling me not to give medicine b/c it is bad. I do what I want and what I feel is right for my daughter you know her better than anybody and you know your dr and trust him, so do what you feel is right.

O.

Hi C.,

My name is C. & I'm a 43 yo mother of a 2 yr old who has been in daycare since 4 months of age. His father is latino but what I can offer you is as I have found not at all against any latina cultural beliefs or practices. My son too has had frequent colds & revisited viruses & bugs. He at one point had bronchial asthma too a year ago but has been free of it since then. Part of it as you probably know is to be expected w/ the daycare experience and is also a part of the development of their immune system - when they get these "bugs" their bodies/ immune system responds & develops as a normal part of growth - but a bit more expedited because they of the exposure in daycare.
They would get it anyway if they were at home too and had siblings in school, bringing it home to them. I was upset also when my child was getting them a lot. All the doctors I brought him too were conservative and not so fast to give him medicine - letting it run its course. Even when he did have medicine prescribed (antibiotics for a couple ear infections) I found it wasn't so helpful in keeping the infections or colds from returning and then you have the added problem of giving too many antibiotics! It was frustrating.
I have tried to steer away from the cold medicines especially when he was so young - and still do as many/most have not been studied (but were still approved anyway) by the FDA for giving to them. At anyrate, my mother is a nurse & I work in healthcare and I was raised in a more "natural" household- home remedies. So I really looked to the more natural methods.
I have been giving him Probiotics & yogurt on a more frequent basis in the winter time. They are food sources and safe, helathy ways to keep the immune system strong especially in the winter months. The cool mist humidifier up high on a table was extremely helpful for him to keep breathing & stopped him from coughing while sleeping at night. (The symptoms are always worse at night, I learned, not only from laying down but also because the sinuses tend to close up at night and so the congestion & mucous is not held there as much as in the daytime). I also had his head propped up slightly which helped to drain the mucous on an infant's prop pillow/ a wedge that they have at babies r us or bye bye baby.

So I did a lot of different things. Including a little cod liver oil 1/2 teaspoon which he liked.(They have some in the health food stores for babies too)- to help w/ the vitamin D & omega oils that they can miss in the winter months but help to keep the immune system strong.

The last thing was a little dab of vicks vapor rub on his chest (and the bottom of his feet) - they make some for babies too - a more gentle formula if you'd prefer.

It seems like a lot, but all combined little steps really helped to minimize his symptoms when they came on. Which are inevitable that they will have their introductions to colds & viruses.
A last thing I noticed was that when I gave him formula (I wasdn't able to pump at work) that all formula's made it worse w/ the exception of Alimentum by Similac. It is more costly but was so worth it. The others had additives and increased vitamins/minerals that babies just cannot process as well as proteins that are not digested and cause GERD which can make them more susceptible ti colds/viruses. Much of the colds & viruses are brought on by allergies / food allergies and weakened or immature immune systems - as little ones have.
One friend used homeopathic medicine w/ success w/ her little daughter, on the advice of her chiropractor.
You may want to check out a healthcare website that I have subscribed to for healthcare newsletters and they have he has great columns & writeups on healthcare & natural treatments. Dr. Mercola at mercola.com
None of the above can be harmful even if they are not helpful whereas cough & cold medicines run risks especially for babies & children.
Good Luck, C.

Hi C.,

You've gotten good advice from other posters & your are doing the right thing.
In regard to your mother-in-law and husband. I think that some people feel really helpless when they cannot help a little one who is ill. Feeling helpless can be frightening to some (especially men!). Also many people from older generations and other cultures feel that there is always something that can be prescribed to help someone who is ill (anitbiotics, herbs, pain killers etc). Even when I was a kid, you never left the doctors office without a prescription in hand if you were sick. Good Doctors now understand that sometimes it is best to just let the body's natural immune system do it's thing.
I'm not sure if this is the case with your husband, but I know that my brother-in-law, who is Mexican, often respects information more if he hears it directly from a male doctor than from my sister. It might put your husband more at ease if he takes your daughter to the doctor himself. Just make sure that he chooses a reputable doctor.

I wish you all the best,

B.

First I want to say I understand all the frustration and need to make the baby all better. I have an 11yr old and a 2 yr old. My 11yr old was always sick with something for about a yr when he was 5 months. Then I changed his diet and he did so much better. I do know that whenever he got a virus the doctor would say there really isn't anything you can give medicine wise for viruses. They have to run
there course. Akso I have had a child in daycare and Now I run one myself and colds are just something that happen. Some children have less colds than others but seemingly constant colds and runny noses are part of being in daycare. The thing is children from 2 to 5 get more colds because they are building their immune systems up. Even if they weren't in daycare they may get less colds but just going to the store puts them in "germs way". So hang in there the colds will stop eventually. :) You can also help your child boost their immune system by making sure they eat the right foods. Also cow's milk makes mucus and that doesn't help at all. My 2 yr old drinks rice milk and she get runny noses but they are never as bad as the other kids in my daycare that drink milk.

Well I hope I helped out.

Hi C., I guess I can relate to the cultural differences you are talking about and also from the medical point of view.
The thing is that for some unknown to me reasons, little children in the States are either not treated at all (if you exclude Tylenol which is not really a treatment) or treated very heavily (read antibiotics or hospitalization). So it's kind of like "let it be, watch what's happening, humidifier, Tylenol) and if it doesn't improve after 10 days antibiotics.
Well, this is not how it works in the rest of the world, ok, I can't speak about Africa and Asia, but it's not like this in South America and Europe. There are lots of medicines, usually plant based, APPROVED FOR USE IN CHILDREN by local equivalent of FDA, both OTC and prescription, that you buy in the pharmacy, that are being given to children to relief the symptoms, to prevent dehydration etc. My friends overseas do not end up taking their children to the hospital, unless they are very seriously ill, here many of them ended up going to the hospital because of dehadration (due to persisten diarrhea and/or vomiting). Another thing is that in other countries doctors make house calls, which especially with the young child is very important. You really don't want to drag your sick and miserable child anywhere, and it's also important to have the doctor see your child often when she is sick.
When my children get sick, I don't even bother anymore to call doctor here, because they are not going to tell me anything that I wouldn't know already. I find it difficult to accept, and all my expat friends find it very annoying.
I do bring lots of medicines for children from Europe every time I go, or have my parents and friends sent them to me, and this is what I keep giving to my children.

It would probably be a good idea if you could find a good pediatrician in Colombia, that you could call (they would usually give you their cell phone number.......) and describe the symptoms when your child is sick,to get his/her opinion. If you feel what he says sounds insane - you don't have to do it. But I would say that having a second opinion would not hurt. And really - all these treatments are really safe, and have been often used for ages (literally!).
Anyway - I can definitely see where your mother in law is coming from.

All the best in New Year and good luck with all the cultural differences :-)!

Hi C.,
I am a Latina mom and there is a world of difference between old school latina moms and your mother in law sounds like shes from the old school. My mom was the same way. She always thought there had to be a medicine for every illness one of the kids had. Unfortunately not all illnesses are treatable by meds, especially viruses. I would have to explain to my mom each time my daughter ran a fever, it wasn't necessarily something an antibiotic would fix. It's all about explaining to them what the illness is and why it can be treated with meds and why it can't, so they understand. Also, when the kids start day care, school, pre-k, constant viruses are inevitable. I sympathize with you as my daughter is the same way. She is always the one to catch a bug back to back. If anything, check with your pediatrician to see if you can give her vitamin C or echinacea to boost her immune system. Perhaps he can reccommend something if these 2 shouldn't be given to her. Vitamins that are age appropriate perhaps. You can also see a nutritionist to see what you can do to boost her immune system naturally.

Hi
forget the cultural difference in opinions.
Your little one is getting cold as all daycare kids do the first 3 years of life and she may still be teething and may have slight allergies.
Medicines are not the answer unless there is fever or infection involved.
Your pediatrician will advise if this needs to be further investigated ( ie allergies)
If she is very stuffy or uncomfortable because of the runny nose, no fevers look into an antihistimine.
Dimetapp didn't work for my little girl so we used triaminic cold/allergy........ask your doctor.
Also make sure that where she sleeps in babysitting is not dusty and check out her linens and blankets as well as any pets around.
Check her room to make sure it is not dusty and change her pillow case daily.
It will be resolved but take it easy so early in life with alot of meds.
Good Luck.
A. (age 41 with 4 year old and pain in the neck husband and italian mom)

First off, if it's viral there is no medication or drug that you can give to make her better. It's viral and needs to run it's course. Kids that are in daycare get sick, ALOT. That's the rules of the game. One kid gets sick and their parents take them to daycare anyway and then everyone else gets it. Giving her medications that she doesn't need will just build an immunity to a drug that she may actually need to fight something in the long run. Keep doing what your doing.

There is a company "HERBS FOR KIDS" I love.
They sell Echinacea and that stuff for strengthening the immune system.
Hyland's also have Vitamin C and other homeopathic stuff for kids' colds.

This can all be found on-line (at Vitacost.com) or in any health food store or Whole Foods.

Staying away from sugar is also best.

Good luck

I can't help you with the cultural difference but I can tell you that you don't want to give the baby antibiotics too often. Doctors find that if you do they don't work as well when they really need them. If its not strep or an ear infection no need to treat anything but the symptoms. I'm sure your dr. knows better then your mother in law. Congratulations on becoming a Mom I love the name you picked for her.

i really can't help about culteral differences in health issues, the ONLY thing that i can say is to go with her pediatricians advice (until you take her to the dr of your husband's choice) ALSO...as far as the diahrea goes.....from what i know, no matter what the heritage the B.R.A.T.(Y.) diet ALMOST ALWAYS works! bananas, rice, apples (applesauce), toast, and sometimes yogurt (i guess the yogurt part all depends on whether there's a dairy issue with the child/person or not. my daughter had diahrea for almost 3 weeks and we tried everything (1st going through what the dr's said, NO milk, and ONLY rice and toast...but i spoke to a family friend who happens to be a nurse and she said BRAT(Y) diets ALL THE WAY...w/in 3 days on this diet she was fine. also, plenty of water, juice and milk tend to make the diahrrea worse, but you can't eliminate milk all together when it's an infant, they NEED it, SO TRY to water it down and see if they'll drink it that way (my daughter does). good luck, and i hope that this helps, at least until you get another dr. to take a look at her and make some other kind of decision. best of luck, i hope your daughter feels better, and remember, any and every child in daycare that gets sick spreads it to EVERY and any other child that is there also.