Crib Training 10 Month Old

Updated on February 19, 2010
Z.A. asks from Pomona, CA
10 answers

Hi mommies
Need your input/advice please. My 10 month old baby is only taking his naps in our bed. He takes 1 2-3hr nap but I have to lay with him the whole time, since he is in our bed and I am afraid he will fall of the bed. I would like for him to take his nap in his crib so I can at least get dress for the day. He was taking his naps in his crib but that was after screaming n crying. I hate putting him through that since we go through screaming and crying at bed time too. Any suggestions?

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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

HI there,
I have a wonderful on-line book that I can send you. It's called "Sleep Sense Program". I was having a horible time getting my baby to fall asleep without me, and this book taught me how to do it. There are a few different suggestions if you are not a fan of the Cry it out method. I used the CIO method for my daughter, and now she sleeps through the night...in her bed. It was a painful process to go through, but as long as you are consistant and repetative, then it WILL work. This book opened my eyes to the fact that all of my daughters problems were actually my fault. Once I changed my habits, my daughter followed right along. Yes, there was a lot of crying, but, I new she was ok, I also knew she only wanted me to be there to help her fall asleep. That was my problem, I never taught my daughter to fall asleep on her own. Once I did that, life got so much easier, and every one slept better.
Shoot me an email (and anyone else who might want it) and I will forward this book to you. ____@____.com
I hope to hear from you soon!
M.

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M.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

By 10 months, my daughter wasn't sleeping in her crib AT ALL. I talked to her pediatrician about it, and she said that for some babies, the bars of the crib make them feel frightened. Out of control. Like if something happened, they would be trapped. We switched her to a twin matress on the floor and we haven't looked back since. It was like having a different baby! She was obviously MUCH more secure.

Why not put pillows around him when he's in your bed to form a barrier? We do this with our daughter all the time when we stay at hotels. I stick her in the middle of the bed and surround the edges of the bed with pillows (NOT up against her, at the edges of the bed) to form a barrier. She snoozes like that just fine.

If he's screaming and crying at sleep time, he's definitely trying to tell you something. That's how they communicate. Maybe try working with him to see what's causing the discomfort.

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

Good morning, Sleep training starts from day one, not at 10 months old, by this time and even younger you have allowed a bad habit to take place, that you now have to break at the exspence of your child. Cribs were created for a purpose, safety for number one, helps guide them into an age of independence and security. I had 3 children and I rocked them all to sleep for naps and bed time in their own rooms and them once a sleep placed them in their own cribs, as newborns I placed them in a bassenet next to our bed NEVER in our bed. They all slept through the night from 6 weeks on. J. L.

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A.M.

answers from Eugene on

My older son almost always slept in our bed. I did lower it so a fall wouldn't be as bad, and I put pillows around him when he slept. I also taught him how to get down on his own--he could definitely do it on his own safely by the time he was walking at 11 months. If the bed is low enough (we have the box spring and mattress), you show them that they can turn and put their feet over the edge, while on their belly of course, and slide down.
I did have him napping in a crib for a couple of months, mostly b/c I wanted to be able to clean in our room while he slept. And the other bedroom was upstairs, I didn't want him getting up by himself and coming down the stairs. He'd nurse to sleep, dead to the world asleep, then i'd pat his back and slowly lay him down and continue patting his back.
You could also get a small futon and put it on the floor, lay with him there until he's asleep then get up--can't do any harm rolling off that!
Oh, and both my boys scooted out of the bed 1 or 2x each. I'm much more worried about a kid climbing over the edge of a crib.

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N.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'm definately not a fan of CIO, so I wanted to share a compromise we came to. For the first week or 2, nap times, at bed time and at least once in the night, I would hold and rock her until she was calm, then put her in her crib and rub her back until she falls asleep. Yes, she gets mad because she wants to sleep with us, but we had a very near miss recently and a trip to the ER, so there will be no more sleeping in our bed :) I guess I'm ok with her being fussy for a bit, I just dont ever want her to be scared or feel like she is alone, so the staying with her while she falls asleep in her crib was my middle ground. We are still working it out, because as soon as we get a rhythm going, something changes - we travel or she is sick or teething, and we have to start all over again. I think she is old enough now to recognize a pattern, so before bed and at naps now we sit and have a bottle and read a book before going in the crib - I miss breast feeding at times like these, that always knocked her out :)

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J.R.

answers from San Diego on

Put your mattress on the floor in the corner so that 2 sides are protected by the wall and put a railing on the other side and your little one will be safe. That is what we have done and my lo has not fallen off the bed since.

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A.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

The words, "Sleep training" really aggravate me. We don't "train" our kids to eat, we don't "train" our kids to walk, we don't "train" our kids! I would suggest you get your baby to sleep however he needs to be - rocked, nursed, held, whatever.

I can completely understand your concern that he may fall off the bed and for that reason I suggest you either get bed rails or wait until he is FULLY ASLEEP in your arms and try to gently lay him down. If he cries pick him up and reassure him you are here for him. It will be a process, but you WILL get there and when you do, you'll be thankful you never made your baby just cry and cry and cry until he gave up on the fact that he was going to be soothed by his mommy.

CIO should never be an option - that's just so mean. I can't imagine letting my babies cry to the point where they are so exhausted they just give up on me. Sad.

I highly recommend you read The Baby Book by Dr. Sears or The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley.

Best of luck to you!

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M.P.

answers from Chicago on

You don't need to use a crib in order for your baby to not fall out of bed. You can build a wall of pillows or put up a bed rail. My kids sleep in our bed and I think have maybe fallen out of bed once or twice total. A lot less than the kids I know who jump out of cribs. Put a monitor on so you can be there the minute he wakes up so that he's not left unsupervised while awake. Or just try moving him when he's sound asleep. Pretty soon he'll be able to get out of bed safely too. Can you lay his crib mattress on the floor so he can still be comforted by you to go to sleep but is on the ground so he's very safe? THere are so many ways to safely bed share with your baby. Just google safe bed sharing.

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D.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

This is the age for sleep training. There will be some pain -- on both sides -- whichever method you choose (ie, crying it out, gradual extinction, etc.)
First make sure that you know his sleeping schedule.
You may consider putting his crib next to your bed and lying next to that. You may have to give him your hand to reassure him you are there, if he's upset that he's not in bed with you.
Week 1 - do that throughout his entire nap, so he is reassured that you are near him, even if he doesn't share a bed with you. Week 2 (or whatever time frame you are comfortable with) - lie with him until he falls asleep, then leave. Week 3 - lie for an amount of time (like 30 min), but *before* he falls asleep. This is usually the hardest step. You may want to come in to soothe him at 5-minute, 10-minute, 15-minute, intervals. But my experience with my 2 boys has been that it just prolongs the agony. Just remember that at first it's hard, so hard, but when you come to dread bedtimes then the whole family is under stress. Good luck.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Many babies don't like cribs.
Or some put baby to nap in a pack n' play.
Or put a mattress on the floor.
Or, put padding/pillows all around the bed, so if he does fall off, he won't get hurt.
Or, use a kiddie play tent, to put him in for nap. Here is a link:
http://www.walmart.com/search/search-ng.do?search_constra...

My kids, used to sleep in our bed, and I have co-slept too. I put pillows around the entire bed on the floor to pad it, in case they fell off. Both my kids have fallen off the bed, though. And not always on the pillows I had put around the bed.
At 10 months old, they are mobile or course. And they can try and get off the bed themselves, anyway, or despite what you have around the bed.

So, I have put a futon on the floor for my kids. Where they can sleep. If not in their cribs. It is a happy medium. And I can co-sleep with them there if need be, then once they fall asleep, I can leave, and not worry if they "fall off" of a bed.

All the best,
Susan

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