Crawling Out of Crib

I would keep up with the bed. You will have to do it sooner or later. I agree with the super nanny approach, putting her back in bed without talking, but stating that it is naptime/bedtime. After 2 weeks, my son finally got the point. I also installed a babygate at his door. I could close the door etc, but then if he got out of his bed, I would at least know that he wasn't going to be roaming the house, and getting into trouble, that way I could finish my shower, workout, whatever. I use a tension gate with a door that you can open and close. You can get them everywhere. I think IKEA even has some.

With you just putting her back in bed she dosent understand. Perhaps even thinking its a game. I would tell her she needs to stay in bed. Once she got out again I would firmly tell her to stay in bed. Watch her and as soon as she acts like she is getting out very firmly tell her stay in bed! Also telling her she is not to get up till you come and get her. My advice is to let her know whats going on.

I used the crib tent for my boy's and it was worth every penny aside from the getting stuff done aspect the kids need to sleep or at least have down time at that age i paid about 80 dollars good luck J.

Hi E.,

You've received some great advice! Like many others, I would not suggest the tent. Given time and watching you open and close it she'll learn just as quickly how to open it.

All of mine (6) learned how to get out of their cribs. It just happens. With my first one, and this worked well for all of them, we established a bedtime ritual. Once upgraded to the toddler bed, we had a talk about being a big girl/boy and what it meant for her/him. So our bedtime ritual went a little something like this: Her bath always came right before bed to relax and calm her a bit from the days events. I would take her into her room, let her pick out her pj's (made her feel like a big girl :) & a bedtime story, (I can still recite the Animals On The Farm), dim the lights (small lamp or night light if it gives off enough light to read), tuck her into her bed with all the essentials (animal, blanket, or any other must haves @ bedtime, so there wouldn't be any reason for her to get up), read the story to her (sometimes 2 or 3 times to relieve any anxiety she may feel about this new step), we'd share our special kisses and I'd again praise her for sleeping in her big girl bed. I'd reassure her and tell her what I was going to do next (i.e.-I'm going into the living room with daddy or the kitchen to do dishes) so she'd know where I was IN the house and also let her know that I'd come back in a few minutes to check on her. This really helped! She was always so proud when I came back and she was still in her bed. I wouldn't say anything, but I'd give a thumbs up & a smile, so she'd see how proud I was of her for her "big girl" behavior. After about 2 weeks, she'd be asleep before the story was over.

Don't get me wrong, she'd get up sometimes, but I think it was a matter of self reassurance that I was indeed where I said I would be. I would either direct or escort her back to bed & gently remind her that it was night night time and mommy would be going night night in her big girl bed soon too. Then she'd tell me, "I'm a big girl like you, Mommy. I have a big girl bed, too!" It made her feel proud!

I, personally, never used gates or punishment for her getting out of bed as I feel the more relaxed and calm they are (and myself) the less it took to get them back in bed. Tears and an upset mom would only make the process take longer. As many have said, kids will take negative attention if it means their getting attention. Personally, I just never wanted them to feel like naptime or bedtime was a punishment. It is another stepping stone in their lives to move out of the crib.

Someone else mentioned, staying where you can be seen. I did this with one, because she wasn't quite as confident. I'd take a chair into the hall outside her door where she could see me and read my own book. We didn't talk, but it gave her the extra sense of security she needed to adjust.

Best of luck!

J. F.
Helping Moms Work From Home
http://www.4MeAndMom.com

I used a crib tent for my kids when they were infants to keep the cat out of the crib but both kids figured out how to open the tent before they were a year old so I don't think that would be a wise thing to get at this point. This is just one of those transitions that you have to do sooner or later. Yes it can be inconvenient but it has to be done. It sounds like you are on the right track of just putting her back to bed with no emotion. She will learn but it will take some time.

Give up on the crib, once they get to the point where they get out on their own it becomes a danger instead of a good thing. And she's two, you can't keep her in bed with a crib tent, she's a big girl now. You're going to have to try different things, like putting here back in bed (the first time telling her it's bedtime) and then doing it over and over until she gets the hint.

Last but not least, you're going to have to pare down what YOU get to do until you figure this situation out. Working out and showers tend to be optional for moms.

You don't want to go back to a crib now - that would send a mixed message and confuse her. I think your only option is that she stay in her room and be quiet- you can get a doorknob guard and of course, totally child proof the room and have a monitor on her - when she's tired she will fall asleep and then you can put her in bed if she isn't there.

I disagree with many people who suggested the tent! She is two years old, I can't imagine the need to put her in a cage. My 7 year old was 18 months when he switched to a bed and the younger was 14 months. Neither of mine had yet learned to climb out of the crib yet. I would imagine that is a neon sign that they are too old to be in a crib. One mother wrote about all the wonderful things your daughter could be doing with you, I agree. By that age she can help with the dishes, laundry, etc.. She can work out with you or dance to the music while you work out. She can play with toys in child-proofed room while you shower. Use a gate if need be. I also agree that it takes a while (maybe 50 times) of putting the child back to the bed (over and over and over again). They do eventually get tired and learn. Invest in educating your child to entertain herself, and control her own behavior. The goal is not to make it impossible for her to do things, but rather teach her to choose the right things to do. Sorry if this sounds harsh, I was just a little shocked and slightly sickened by some of the postings that encouraged keeping kids confined in a crib when they were way past the age to confine like that (in my opinion). Good luck.

Our son went through this as well. He started climbing out before he turned two. I was afraid that he would hurt himself so we brought in a bed. He would get out and try to come into the family room. We ended up sitting in the hall by his room but he was not able to see us. He would start getting out and all we had to do is say "get back in that bed" and he would. We generally sat there for about 15 minutes. This went on for a while but finally he coped a clue. He is now 16 and I can't get him OUT of bed!

I feel like I'm the only mom who doesn't see this as a big deal. When kids switch from cribs to toddler beds (which is a must once they are able to climb out of the crib for safety reasons), kids will naturally want to explore their new freedom. We put a gate on my son's door and explained to him that it was bedtime/naptime and he had to stay in his room until we came to get him. He would inevitably get out of bed & play quietly, and then crawl back into bed usually within 30 minutes, cover himself up, and go to sleep with no problem. We could easily peek in to be sure he was okay, and we had made sure there was nothing in his room within reach that could be a danger to him. Within a few weeks, he stopped getting out of bed so much. I noticed that when my MIL would constantly try to put him back in bed, he would fight it & keep getting back out just so she would come back in there. (We lived with my in-laws at the time and she felt she also had to mother my son too, which is a whole different story)

One thing that helped a lot with him was actually putting a twin bed in there for him because he was so big, he was uncomfortable in his crib that converted to a toddler bed. He started sleeping just fine after that, whereas before, we'd find him curled in a ball in the corner of the toddler bed or sleeping on the floor and then wake up cranky. He was just over a year old at the time.

Our twins cribs were in our bedroom & when they started climbing out of their crib. we purchased toddler beds & moved them into their own room & put up two gates at their doorway one above the other to keep them in their room.
That's the only solution we could come up with. we even took down the cribs & tried putting them in playpens but they climbed out of those also. We put a baby monitor in their room out of their reach to monitor them during the night & at nap time. It took them a couple of weeks. but they finally realized that's where they were going to be (in their own room) & finally adjusted but we kept those gates up for a long time to keep them from getting up & rambling through the house at night & from trying to get in our bed after we fell asleep. Good luck!

Managing behavior isn't something you do TO your child but something you teach your child to do.

Give her limits, when she crosses them, she gets natural consequences. She's testing you. Focus on her for a few days and train her to stay in her bed. Then you'll have your time back to yourself.

Don't invest in a gadget that controls your child. Teach your child how to control herself. Save your money. Invest in your child.

Put a gate in her doorway. Clean out anything from her room that could choke her. Put her down and tell her it is nap time. That worked with mine long enough to get him to lay down (usually on the floor where he fell asleep.) Go check on her (sneak) ever so often.

teach her to stay in bed now, it will only get harder as she gets older! you may have to stand by the door and put her back in bed 50 times, but she will eventually get tired and fall asleep. my girls were 18 mo. and 14 mo. when they started climbing out of the crib. that can be very dangerous, so I immediately put them in toddler beds. I had to turn the doorknob around so the lock was on the outside and lock it after I put her in bed. I would then stand there and every time she came to the door, I'd give her a minute or 2 and if she didn't get back in bed, I'd open the door, tell her "no, it's bedtime/naptime, you have to stay in bed", and that's it. no extra hugs or kisses, no sitting there with her, just say it, put her in bed, and walk out. sometimes she would immediately get back up and I'd have to turn right around and do it again. it was extremely frustrating to stand there, sometimes for an hour, and listen to her scream. but in the end, it only took a couple weeks and then she was staying in bed the first time and going right to sleep. it's well worth it in the end!
also, make sure you aren't trying to make her sleep too much. 12-14 hrs is plenty at 2 yrs old. and make sure she is getting plenty of exercise, too, so she is tired enough to fall right asleep.
and she is plenty old enough to "help" you or get involved in everyday chores! she can unload plastic containers or other small unbreakable things out of the dishwasher, or sort silverware. she can hand you laundry to wash and pour in the soap. you can hand her wet clothes to put in the dryer. she can fold washclothes or match socks. you can give her a washcloth wet with water to clean the table or bathtub. you can buy her a kid's vacuum and broom so she can vacuum and sweep alongside you. she will love helping and being a big girl and will learn skills in the meantime! it might take a little extra time for you to get things done, but this way you don't have to wait until she is occupied or sleeping, and then once she is in bed at night, you can put your feet up!
just remember, be consistent and she will learn quickly =) good luck!

I would not get a "Tent". My 2 year old has stopped taking a nap every day. What I do instead is enforce "quiet time". This has helped change my point of view...which believe me...was hard. Now he will sleep sometimes, sometimes play. At night, we just keep walking back in and putting him back in bed. We did the same thing with our now 4 year old. One good thing--it's a phase. It will be over before you know it. I know what you mean about the getting things done statement. You have to pick your battles and sometimes showers every day lose out. I shower at the gym more than at home. Oh- I have noticed that both of my boys sleep/nap well only after a physical activity.

I was in the hospital on bedrest with my last baby when my husband called to tell me my julia then 20 months had not only climbed out of her crib but clipped the edge of her dresser. I wasn't even released to drive when I went out and bought the crib tent.
I will tell you it not only gave me peace of mind but it worked. (she did learn how to unzip it) so I put a little clip that was easy for me but hard for her to keep that zipper on.
I only had to use it a couple of weeks because it helped her understand she was supposed to stay in.
Even after I took it off she stopped climbing out.
I was able to find one another mother was selling after she no longer needed it for a good price. I think they run around $60 or so new, but do the craigslist or something simiiar. I would give you mine, if I didn't know I have a second climber (15 mos) on my hands.
Good luck and I hope this helped.

My son was the same way at 14 months. I had to do the same as another mom--putting two gates at his doorway, one above the other. It is a bit of a pain at first but it's really good to be able to get those things done (shower, workout, etc.). He was able to climb back into his crib by 16 months so we left it as a crib because he still moved around too much while sleeping to convert to the toddler bed but if she can't get back in bed on her own, leave it a toddler bed so she can get back easily. Be sure to explain to her that it is time to close her eyes and rest/sleep and that she can get back up and play after her nap. I know my mother in law gave each of my nephews a piece of chocolate after their naps if they went down without a big fight but they may have been a little bit older. Good luck and I wish you a good night's sleep!

One other thing that I just remembered is that if she can potentially get outside you might consider putting your telephone number in her pjs. I made labels for my son but before I got them I just wrote it on masking tape and put it on my son's back where he could not see it. It came in very handy one night we had a sitter. I got a call just after we finished dinner from a neighbor. Their is really nothing scarier than an escape artist child.

Its not safe to put her back in a crib. She will climb out again. The tent isn't safe either, she will try to get out of it, and could scare her too. She is most definitely old enough to be in a toddler bed. I have almost 2 year old twins. They have been in toddler beds for about 6 months. You just need to make sure her room is safe. Get a video monitor if that makes you feel better. Can she not be in the bathroom with you playing while you shower? (by the way both of my girls are very active & climbers)

When my daughter started climbing out of the crib, I repositioned so it was no longer up against the wall. She couldn't climb out of it unless she could use her feet to help shimmie up the wall as she pulled herself up on the rails. Admittedly, it looked odd in the room, but it stopped the climbing cold.

Also, pediatricians say that most children do not understand imaginary boundaries ("stay in bed") until they are closer to age 3. You will be setting yourself up for a constant battle if you try to teach/discipline something that she has not developed the cognitive milestone for yet.

Post-Script:
In case this in helpful....

http://www.babycenter.com/404_how-and-when-should-i-move-...
"...Some toddlers simply aren't ready for a bed. It takes a certain amount of cognitive development for your child to understand that a bed has imaginary boundaries that he must stay within..."

The tent is a very good investment. We have used it since my daughter was 9 months because she was already trying to crawl out of the crib then. She is now almost 2 1/2 and is still in the tent. I tried to take it off at one point and she was immediately out of it every 5 seconds. My hope is that she will soon be able to be reasoned with and will understand that she needs to stay in bed so we can convert to a toddler bed, but for now, it has saved her sleep habits. We also have the tent for the pack n play when we travel. If you buy the tent and you think it doesn't fit your crib, buy some velcro and make the velcro tabs longer. We had to do that with our crib.

We had to attach a hook to the crib to attach zipper string to when she figured out how to unzip it. No problems since.

If she got out of the crib, she will get out of the tent. If she is climbing out of the crib, it is no longer safe as a crib either. She is 2 years old and old enough for time outs. (a min/year of age) This is a discipline issue. That is how it should be treated. Make sure you have a good routine so she knows what to expect and then if she gets up, she gets a time out. It will take a while, but be consistant. childproof her room and babygate her in or get a screen door that will latch for heer room to keep her in for safety reasons.

Hi E.,

We used the "crib tent" for two of our children. We made it fun..like they were going camping :) It was presented in a positive way and it made them feel secure while keeping them safe and giving me peace of mind. We DID need to tie the string into a bow to keep our youngest from unzipping the tent.

Another idea is to place a roll type gate at the doorway of your child's room, although mine quickly learned how to hurdle the gate.....

-D.

E.,
why don't you ask your husband when hes home were are the nuts and bolts and that your going to try to do it yourself to convert it back to a crib. He'll see you making an effort and if hes a man w/ a heart he'll pitch in to help you.But you make the first move and ask for the parts he disassembled.

I didn't know what Karen mentioned, about the imaginary boundaries, so we started my oldest in her "big girl bed" last summer, at a little over two years. I will say that she is a rule-challenger, and even using spankings and the Supernanny approach, she didn't reliably stay in bed until pretty recently. It took her probably six months to get the idea, and it was a battle much of the time. Maybe I should have started her earlier (some of my friends who started earlier seemed to have less trouble), but maybe not. And since you and I don't have the luxury of going back in time, maybe you can use the crib tent idea. Or just tough it out, stay consistent, and hope it doesn't take six months! :) GoD bless you in whatever you decide to do!

Hi E.,

I'm not sure about a crib tent. It sounds like making a crib into a cage. If a child is awake, why does she have to be in a crib? Maybe have her play next to you while you workout, or take her to the daycare area of the gym? Or take her to a mother's day out while you take care of other business?
Good Luck!
D.

My son started climbing out of the crib at around the same time. I was not ready for that! I lowered the mattress as low as it would possibly go and that helped a bit. I peeked in on him occasionally (b/c he would usually do it right after going down for naptime and eventually fall asleep) and found that he was actually quite skilled at it and I was not worried about him hurting himself! Maybe it is a second child thing for me! Anyway, we persisted in keeping him in the crib until he was actually about 3 1/2 (old I know) but he eventually learned just to call for me when he was ready to get up. Even when we switched him to a big bed he would stay in his bed and call to me for a long time before he realized he could get out of bed on his own. Oh, and we have a one-story so I wasn't as worried about him getting out of his room--although if I had stairs I would have a gate at the top of the stairs. I know this probably helped me feel more comfortable.

Good luck!

Turn it back into a crib. Work on the discipline issue, too. Was the mattress at its lowest position in the crib? Good luck!

I was in the exact same spot a few months ago. I just kept putting her back w/o talking. ( The first time, I would explain, but after that, any form of communication just seemed to reward her.) Sometimes it would take 20 something times, but eventually she gave up. I would just keep at it if I were you. Also, there is a nightlight that helped me. It is called the Good night light i think. It is a moon while they are supposed to sleep and turns into a sun when they can wake up. You have to order it online. Good luck!

If she can climb out of her crib, she is done with it. Now it can be dangerous, cause she can really injure herself and you would not know till the morning, if it was tragic.

This is why we put our daughter in a bed at 1 years old. She had been walking already for 6 months and could scale that crib so quickly and we did not want her to begin climbing any other furniture when we were not awake. She also knew that we "never climb on any furniture, unless it is the chair and sofa and then we only sit on our bottoms".. It just starts bad habits to allow them to climb on any furniture.

You can start her on a mattress on the floor, and work up to the bed.. She can learn that it is time to sleep and that she should stay on this bed. Place it against the wall. Yes, it will take work and constant reminders, at this point, but this is the safest solution and worth it in the long run.