You are a 2009 graduate of xxxx with a degree in xxxxx.
Second paragraph
I would start that paragraph stating you have a passion for teaching (leave out the word students) and that you deeply care for... Could you then say that in addition to teaching all core subject matter you incorporate science and technology into your reading and math lessons by doing xxxx?
I would leave out the number of students you teach (16) unless you think they really need to know that. Just say I instruct my students in...
I would say that you ... co-plan and co-teach a weekly science module. It does not matter that it is with your mentor and colleague.
last paragraph..Say I believe I would be an asset to the district because xxx. Do you know what the districts core beliefs and values are? If so state them and say that "I too share the belief that xyz.
reword the sentence about small town atmosphere, student success and use of technology. They seem like different thoughts to me.
Instead of saying please give me a call...say I am available to discuss my qualifications further at your convenience.
Good luck! Also, just want you to know I thought your letter was great the first time I read through it. Then per your request I went through and picked it apart. I seriously doubt the SD will be a critical as I was:)
You sound like a great teacher that would be an asset to any district!