I went through this with 2 babies and it is a one of the big contributers to why I don't really want a 3rd. It is exhausting and worries down the whole family but, I do have A LOT of great experience to help. First off, this is a great support group for you to use. There is alos one on Facebook called the fussy baby site and it is a special place for moms and dads who have extra trying babies for whatever reason and GERD is one of them. So, sage advice is:
1. Get a binky...mine would only use the latex gerber ones, the ones that look like the old fashioned ones. They are at Walmart and Target.
2. Switch Formula....it is more than likely a milk PROTIEN intolerance, it is NOT lactose. These are very different and you need special formula. I used Similac Alimentum, and severl other moms used Nutramingen. They are basically the same thing, but WIC paid for the Alimentum with a prescription from the doctor. This will also help with the constipation, it actually didn't go away with my daughter until we put her on this formula when she was 5 months...it took a long time to get to this point, my son went right on it with in a week of being born because I knew this time.
( I couldn't breastfeed because I didn't make enough milk so we had to supplement, but they were sensitive to what I ate that the milk made them scream. When I was pregnant I couldn't eat anything that the kids were allergic or sensitive to including: dairy, fresh veggies, salads, water, toast, chocolate, meat, juice, gatorade, etc..you wouldn't believe what I couldn't eat when I was pregnant!!)
3. Bottles: use a Playtex dropin nurser because you can get all the air out. Reflux and gas and air seem to go together really badly. Again, my kids only liked the latex nipples, I think they are softer and more like mom. The other bottles that are supposed to stop air don't stop running out and that can overwhelm the baby.
4. Buy and Sweet Peace Soother from Graco. This will do more than any reflux nap nanny in my opinion. It comes with a seat that goes on it, but it also takes the Snugride carseat and the snugride 32 so that when the baby sleeps in the car you can keep the motion going at home. Motion seems to be key here for sleeping, also the angle is ideal for babies with reflux. (I personally would give one of these to EVERY new mom and dad who has a fussy baby.) My kids slept in it every night until they reached the 25 pound weight limit.
5. Sleep needs to be done at 30 degrees mininmum! This is why she needs to sleep on a person, it keeps the acid down that hurts.
6. Hyland's Colic pills....just buy a big lot from online, its cheaper and you'll use them. Target and Fred Meyers are the other places to get them. I never used Gripe Water because these worked so well.
7. Sometimes being worn is too squishy and painful. Neither one of my kids wanted to be worn, but they did want to be held and bounced. I watched the entire Gilmore Girls Series with the first one....I got to pick out some other shows for myself with the second. I just want you to understand how much time you may need to spend holding, rocking and comforting you may be in store for.
8. Remember, this will be grown out of. The Zantac by itself wasn't enough, so we added Prevacid and that helped more. We finally were able to stop the meds about 10 months, and now only needs them occasionally. My daughter was never diagnosed with GERD so she didn't get any meds and it is SO much easier with them.
9. Be aware and look for some other things like torticollis....this can make the stomach more acidic for some reason. DD had a little bit, but DS had it severely and is almost done with physical therapy for it he will be 2 in April.
10. MOST importantly: This too shall pass!! It is not forever and she should outgrow it eventually.
Good luck and if you need more help or support please let us or me know. You are not alone!!!
Edited: One very major thing I forgot to mention is that you should feed less more often. We fed 2-4 oz every 45-90 minutes. The more over fed the tummy gets the more the baby spits up and hurts... Less more often is the best way to go. We also watered down the formula making it weaker than the recipe on the can. The frequent freedings is one of the reasons it takes so much parental time with a fussy newborn like this.