Hi there...I'm looking for some advice as to how I can handle very different Christmas traditions between my husband's family's & mine. I always grew up where Santa came overnight and we'd wake up Christmas morning & open gifts in our PJ's. One side of my husband's family (parents are divorced) celebrates more on Christmas Eve...all afternoon/evening they play up Santa with adults taking turns ringing sleigh bells outside the house's windows; saying, "HoHoHo" as they did so; saying from inside the house while looking out the window, "I just saw Santa's sleigh fly by...did you see it?" to the kids, etc. I mean really hyping it all up. Then they'd eat dinner. Afterwards the kids & some adults would go out for a drive to see the Christmas lights, while singing carols. While they were gone, Santa would come & as they pulled back in to the driveway they'd see him walking off yelling, "HoHoHo!" They'd be so excited they'd run straight inside to find all their presents set out for them to open. This tradition started with my husband's grandparents doing this for their kids (my husband's father) because the dad worked on Christmas Day, so they made this "adjustment" to fit their family's needs at the time. It's carried over now to my husband's generation & his cousin's kids. We spend some Christmas' with these family members...and I'm at a loss as to how to handle this...because other years, when we're not with them, we'll celebrate with Santa coming overnight.
Any suggestions how I can "explain" this my kids -- why Santa comes right after dinner at this relative's house (who happens to only live 5 minutes from our house), but other times he comes overnight to our house, or the other grandma's, etc (wherever we happen to be the other years)??? With this relative's house so close to ours, I can't imagine playing it off as "Santa just arrives here earlier than at our house" since we live so close together.
I know I can explain to those family members that we'll be celebrating that Santa comes overnight for us & hopefully they'll respect that. But, I still don't know how to handle the fact that Santa came right after dinner while we're there with our kids...but then he'll come overnight at our house later that night? I hope I'm making sense here & would just really appreciate input as to how to I can try to handle this.
Thank you & happy holidays!
Thank you to everyone for your wonderful responses & suggestions! I saw several that I hadn't thought of & are good suggestions. I am so analytical that I hadn't even thought about how the kids won't really understand or know the difference until they are probably old enough to know he's not real...so just making up something to go along with the "magic" that is Santa will do just fine! =) Thank you again & happy holidays to all!
My parents would always tell us that Santa just knows where you are going to be and when. You can always say you wrote a letter to Santa telling him where you would be and where the present should be sent. Good luck and happy holidays!!
I think that's a fun tradition...but my suggestion would be to just go home after looking at lights instead of coming back to the grandparents house.
Well what I was kind of thinking was combine both traditions, that Santa comes right after dinner but then they can't open their presents until the morning when they wake up. That means they will go to bed fast, so they can wake up early. We did something like that with my family for a while. We all went to church, but when we came home, just after midnight, Santa would have already come, but we could not open anything until we woke up in the morning.
The way to explain it to them, is maybe say something like what my dad had told me when I was younger (He had a special phone, that could call Santa, when ever my dad wanted to), and tell them that you call Santa and tell them the best arrangement for the year. ...Something like that may work. :)
Good luck!
And happy holidays to you too!!
I don't think you have to be so logical about when Santa comes. Kids aren't going to see through the myth just because he comes at different times on different years! You could play it up both years, saying, "I wonder if Santa get here before or after you go to bed this time?" When it gets to bed time, explain that Santa must have started on the other side of the world this year, so it's time to go to bed and when she wakes up, she'll find gifts under the tree.
I think it sounds fun for you to share both traditions. Think of all the fun memories your kids will have!
I have three kids and the nice thing that I've learned, is when they're 2, you learn a lot and they don't remember a lot. So I would do both and come next year, she probably won't remember one way or another and by then you'll have an idea what works better for your family. Hope you find a wonderful tradition for your family!
W. Nichols-Dewey, CD(DONA)
www.birthfirstdoula.com
Hello,
You might tell your kids that their daddys family a long long time ago asked santa if he could make a special trip to their house early on Christmas eve. The reason for this is, when their daddy was little, his daddy had to work alot including Christmas day & he really wanted to be able to enjoy seeing the excitement on his kids faces whenever they opened up their gifts from Santa. And since Santa is such a nice man, he did that for them & still does to this day.
And that there are alot of families that have that same type of situation today. So, Santa go to those families houses first, and then he delivers to all the other families in the world. That is why he doesn't show up to our house until after they are sound asleep.
You might include that Santa is not playing favorites, he just likes to make everyone happy, as long as they have been good all year.
I hope this works, if you should decide to use it.
Let me know.
Good luck, & have a Happy Thanksgiving & a Very Merry Christmas,
C.
I'd just tell them Santa has a long night ahead of him and so he has to stop by some houses earlier.
When I was growing up we celebrated Christmas Eve at my Grandparents, who lived 5 houses up the street and around the corner from us. A neighbor always came to the door after dinner, playing Santa, and gave each of us 1 special gift, and then (as we perceived it) still came to our house over night, eating cookies and milk, giving the reindeer the reindeer food that we had left and leaving presents. I don't know that we ever questioned it, it was just a really cool thing that St Nick made a personal appearance at my Grandparents. If we did wonder about it, it didn't change the fun of our unique family tradition.
Hi T.,
A girlfriend of mine had this problem while growing up but it was actually with her siblings. She was the oldest and her parents celebrated Christmas Eve. When her mom remarried,they celebrated Christmas Day except for my friend.
they explained it this way. He father's family originally came from Germany and because of the time difference, and family tradition Santa comes earlier for kids whose families come from Europe. Santa is very smart and magical so Santa can accomadate traditons for all families everywhere. I hope this helps
We had a similar situation with my parents when we were little. Santa came to grandma's Christmas eve, but to our house Christmas day.
Here's they way they explained it:
"Santa calls us and asks when he should arrive, and if he needs any special entry method. Like grandma doesn't have a chiminy, so she leaves a key under the mat. That way he doesn't bump into any kids by mistake, or leave gifts for someone who's away on holiday."
To my kid brain, it made perfect sense. After all, my mom was on the phone scheduling doctors visits, piano lessons, and everything else. Why not Santa's visit? This also helped for times we were not home for Christmas, as mom explained that she had arranged that with Santa in advance.
Too funny now, but it was simple and made sense to me then. Might be a good way to do things for your family.
You might want to ask your husband or in-laws how they explained it -- I'm sure they had neighbor friends who had Santa come overnight. The whole idea of Santa is very magical for kids anyway, so just make something up that fits in with the "magic" of it.
By chance do you have a chiminey and the relatives do not? Then say that Santa has to visit the non-chimney places first so someone can open the door and let him in. If that doesn't work, just say that the way Santa's magic schedule works (the schedule that lets him visit all the kids all over the world in one night) is that he has to visit the relative's house right after dinner. By the time your kids are old enough to figure out that isn't logical they will be old enough to figure out that Santa isn't real.
One thing I know is kids kind of fall for anything. I learned from my first boy that until he learned that there was no Santa he believed anything I told him about how Santa works. That being said, We had different traditions at each family and we just brushed it off as Santa is magical and celebrates each house for whatever works for that family. You can give her the whole story about how her grandpa worked Christmas day when her dad was growing up so Santa came early. In other words, Santa just stuck with that tradition at their house. The good news is, she is only 2 and you probably won't have to explain too much for several years.
Sounds like a pretty fun way to celebrate Santa anyways, very creative. You might find as she gets older, she might prefer the after dinner thing. How exciting that you might actually get to see him. = )
In short, don't make too much of it. Both of your traditions are equally important so enjoy them for what they are and don't try to undo them.
Happy Holidays!
Do you do this at different places? You could make it geographical issue.
T.,
what an amazing holiday tradition challenge!! How did your husband's parents handle it with relation to "other people"?
I don't envy your struggle here. And I've got no answers for you either!! I sure wish I did though!!
Good luck!!
V.
I think you should just let it go. Your daughter is only 2 and that is such a fun tradition your husband's family has started. If down the road your daughter questions you you could tell her that they wrote to Santa and asked him to come to their house early while she was there so that they could watch her open up her gifts from Santa and that he will go to her house on his normal stop. My kids get Santa gifts from my parents and us, my son is almost 6 and he is so excited that Santa thought he was such a good boy that he deserved presents from him at his house and his Nana and Papa's house.
how about a story about how great grandpa was a friend of Santa and so he would try to drop by early before the rest of his rounds? or ask your daughter, why do you think Santa comes so early here? she might come up with the best idea of a story for you!! :)
tell her that you signed up for the list of deliveries for while you are sleeping, and the relatives must be on the other list that comes earlier in the night.
just a couple of ideas.
we are trying to figure out how to maintain as much of our traditions as we can while being with my mom this year--we open most of our gifts christmas eve and just have santa presents on christmas morning, they open everything in the morning.
we do our big dinner christmas eve, they do it on christmas day. little things but somehow we make it work. :)
