I have 3 year old twins, from the time that they came home, they have slept with me. I was a single mom up until 8 months ago. I re-married. My husband has not had a problem with the twins sleeping with us, but I think that we need to get our bed back for just the two of us. I know that them sleeping in their own room may be harder on me than on them, but I am looking for suggestions on how to get them in their own room. Thanks for any suggestions!
Can you get a full sized bed and a twin bed into their room (or even two full sized beds)? Then they can still sleep together comfortably, but without you. That might help ease the transitions. I think that a lot of twins like to sleep together until they don't fit anymore.
I would sit them down and have a talk with them about how they are big girls now and they get to have their own bed, isn't that exciting?! Dont make it sound like you are kicking them out of yours. Make the bed as exciting as possible, with princess sheets and a canopy, or whatever works for them. Also, I would seriously consider letting them share one bed. They are used to it, they are twins, and it will make for an easier transition. Why would they want to sleep alone all of a sudden? If you have 2 rooms for them, make one the playroom and one the bedroom with a larger bed.
I just recently got my son to start sleeping in his own bed again. He is 27 mos. He used to put himself to sleep from about 15 mos- 21 mos, but then stopped when my husband's job took him out of town. For about 6 months we battled with sleep. I tried getting him his own bed, but that didn't help anything. I had to lay down with him til he fell asleep for nap and bedtime (for up to an hour!) and then every night he'd end up coming in my room. Finally I tried this:
I would do our nighttime routine of read a book, etc, turn out the light, give him some kisses, and then I told him I was going to go in the other room, but that I would set the timer on microwave for 5 minutes and I would come back to check on him and give him more kisses. I just told him he needed to stay tucked in and I'd be right back and to listen for the beep. I make sure I go back in AS SOON as it beeps and give him kisses, then I tell him the same thing over about coming back. I praise him for staying in bed and just keep reassuring him that I will be right back. I actually set the time for longer than 5 minutes if he seems fairly calm and sleepy when I go back the first time, so that after that I am usually setting it for 7 or 8 minutes. If he calls out for any reason that is real, I go back in before my 5 minutes is up- like if he needs a tissue (he has a cold). If he gets up (which he has only done a couple times, I just put him back in bed, tell him the little speech, kiss and restart the timer. He falls asleep pretty quickly on his own now instead of the half hour or more that it used to take, and he seems to sleep through the night in his own bed if he falls asleep on his own. It has worked every single time, with very little fuss. I think if you talk to the girls and explain what it going to happen, it will help. Good luck!
Hi,
I have my 5 year old sleep with me from time to time and I love it. He is so sweet and they grow up so fast and one day they will not want to sleep in your bed. If you are happy with them there just go to another room when you and your husband want to fool around. Kids are so lovely and they will not be yours forever. When they are grown you will wonder where the time went. If others are saying that they should be in their own room just ignore them. What happens in your house is your business. As long as everything is working don't change it.
On one of those morning news shows the other day... they addressed this issue.
So the "expert" says... put them on the floor on a futon. Then gradually... put the futon mattress farther and farther away from your room/bed... and then closer and closer to their own room/bed. Then one day the floor futon will be IN their room. AND then you get them in their room.
Sounds like a LONG drawn out thing to me. Again, this is what an "expert" said. LOL
Us, we have a floor futon IN our room... for times when our kids need to be "with" us (like if they are sick or scared) they can be in our room & not in our bed... and they can sleep there. We think its no big deal. My kids do sleep in their room... but sometimes, they are in ours, on the FLOOR futon. Its a happy medium for us. And we have not had any "battles" about it. It works for us.
Your kids are 3 now... so maybe get some flashlights for them to keep in bed WITH them, and lots of cozy stuffed toys for comfort etc. Night light too.
Its a process.... so it won't happen over night. They main thing is that they are trying "their best"... they may not be perfect about it, yet... but main thing it not be a "battle". Sleep and their bed/room should be a happy place to go to.... so they can sleep well. AND have a ROUTINE about it every night. The same routine.
Good luck,
Susan
If they are 3, each time they go into your room to sleep, you walk them back to their room and put them back in their beds. EVERYTIME.
Tell them they need to sleep in their own beds. You just have to do this over and over so they know you are serious.
Maybe get a sound machine, and a night light for them.
I think you should have them pick out their own bedding so they will be excited to be in there. But the biggest thing is to not let your guilt keep you from following thru with it. This process will not be easy.
When my son was little and would wake up it was easier to let him come into our bed then to put him back in his. After a while we decided he couldn't sleep with us anymore. We told him he couldn't sleep in our bed and we would go put him back in his bed. He would come back and lay down on the floor at the foot of our bed without us knowing till morning. After a couple more days of that we told him he couldn't come into our room. We found him in the doorway of our room! It was heart wrentching! But we stuck to our guns. He finally stayed in his bed after about a week or two.
Just don't start any new habits that you will want to break later like laying down in their bed with them. It just creates another situation you will soon want to stop.
We have a cd player in the rooms and night lights.
If you have a cd recorder you can make cd's out of your own voice readign stories. In the morning give them a treat when they make it through the night. NOt candy but lots of love and maybe a smoothie.
Tell them that now that they are big boys they need to have a bed and room of their own. Put them in there for their naps and bedtime, you can leave a light on and tell them that mom and dad will hear them if they are needed. Better late than never...
You might want to get them a double bed to sleep in together. I don't have twins, but my kids love to pile in one bed together and I worry less about someone falling out in a full sized bed.
One of the best things to try is start them in their room, but if they need to snuggle in the middle of the night, allow them in. This will build their confidence in knowing they can always come to you. If starting them there doesn't work, do the reverse--start them in your bed and when you come to bed move them. Most mornings mine wouldn't mind waking up in their own rooms.
Enjoy it while you can!
Susan gave you good advice.
We sleep with a 2 year old in our room in his own bed...
Lots of changes in your girls' lives right now. Congratulations to you and your new family unit. How great that you have found a partner to parent with.
I would just like to add that there are no absolutes. Do what is easiest on you and your girls. I would make this transition a process.
Yes, involve them in picking out big girl beds and special sheets (we found sock monkey sheets that my ds loved). Make their bed a special, peaceful place.
They may willingly go to their own beds. How about letting them co-sleep with each other? We all like a warm secure body next to us.
Good luck, follow your instinct and enjoy your new life together,
W.
Try letting them sleep in your room on sleeping bags, like it's an "adventure" or "fun". Then slowly moving them to their own room. Possibly moving the sleeping bags in their room and you sleeping in their one night and then, try a reward (maybe going to the park) for sleeping in their room all night by themselves. Good luck!
Try these 2 posts for ideas on your sleeping issue with the twins.
http://blogs.goddardsystems.com/Cedar-Park-TX/2010/01/09/...
http://blogs.goddardsystems.com/Cedar-Park-TX/2009/10/30/...
Good luck!
Start by getting toddler beds and putting them right next to yours if possible so you can still reach out your arm at night and it's still really familiar. Then in 2-3 months you can make a really exciting move to a new bedroom, get their imput on bedding and decorations, and start cuddling and putting them to sleep in their beds in their room. That's what we did with ours after co-sleeping and it worked great. She still wants to come in if she has a bad dream or something early in the morning but I see no problem with that.
Our daughter slept with us 'til she was almost 4. Around age 2, we tried putting a bed in our room but she would just crawl into our's in the middle of the night. When she turned 3, I started telling her that when she turned 4, she would start sleeping in her own room. Eventually, I got a calendar to count down the days she had left to sleep with us. We really hyped it up so that she would think it was a great idea and not a demotion or punishment of any kind. About 2 months before her birthday, she started sleeping in our guest bedroom on her own. Then we got her an awesome castle bunk bed off of craigslist and that was that. Craigslist has great used beds--for my twin boys, we got ones shaped like a train and vw bug. Don't underestimate the power of somewhere neat to sleep!
