Okay so my son has always been the type that would entertain himself and I would get myself involved with playing with him. Well now he is 2 and for about the last 3-4 weeks he has been so clingy. I mean we come home from daycare (he started "big boy" daycare on 8/25 and he loves it) and he says "hold me, hold me" until I pick him up. I always try to spend at least 10-15 minutes with him when we first walk in the door, before I start whatever needs to be done, picking up and such. But he will not play by himself, i mean even if i am not doing anything and we are sitting on the floor playing, that does not satisfy him he needs me to be right there. He will not go into another room unless I go with him, he just got a wooden train table on Sunday and will not play with it on his own, he want to go in his room and play but will not go unless daddy or mommy are with him. It is getting irritating! I try to encourage him to go on his own or will play for 10 minutes then get up (to check on dinner usually) and he comes right out behind me pulling on me again!! So, my question is... is this normal behavior and will he every go back to the independent playing he used to do? Sorry this is so long.
I hope this doesn't sound too harsh. It sounds like he just misses Mommy.
R. B.
Hi K., even iam experiencing the same thing. Mostly boys r like that in this age.My boy is now 2yrs and seven months and he picked a habit of holding onto my hair while sleep immdly after i stopped breadfeeding at 2yrs. This habit is keeping on increasing day by day , he even kisses and plays with my hair wildly. He plays with my hair as if it is his toy/friend.I sometimes get irritated to the core. But if i dont give my hair to him he gets scared or gets angry and cries. My parents suggest that these r normal behavioural changes. Maybe he wants to stay close with his mother. Both my kids , i have a elderly daughter to my son and she is 4yrs now, do not go to a room without light in it or want me/somebody to accompany them in their play room. Even i feel that maybe they r a little scared, and that they r not used to such things and that it all takes time to adjust. When boys cling to us more it means that they need a sense of security from us.Thats it.. it will all change as they grow. Dont worry!
I have to agree with Regina. He wants more of you.
This is so developmentally normal. He is becoming more independent, and yet he still needs mom.
He is going through a big adjustment having just started school. He probably misses you, and the kind of schedule/routine he had before.
He needs independent time, but reassure him you are there. I would suggest for a little while you might try having him engage in independent activities a little closer to you (instead of in a room where he can't see you); if you are in visual range he will feel calmer. If you need to step away, tell him "I'll be right back", and leave for a couple of minutes at a time, gradually extending the length of time. If he cries reassure him, and do what you need to do. He may follow, but don't stop what you are doing, just repeat "I'll be right back". He will soon learn that you will be back. Just make sure to come back, and tell him "I'm back." When you are in another room, call out periodically and let him know you are around. Gradually extend the amount of time you are away. If you have chores to do, like make dinner, have some special toys he really likes that come out only when you are doing chores.
I don't know how drop off is for you, but drop off can also be a traumatic time at this age. If you are having difficulty with separation, a very, very important thing during this milestone is to make your goodbyes quick, and FINAL. Do NOT do the "just one more hug, one more kiss" routine. Make departures quick, and final. Stay calm. He will read and mimic your cues. Assure him the caregiver will take good care of him, and say "I'll be back." Please, don't go back to "check on him". If he sees you (and he probably will) you are only delaying the inevitable. It's unfair to him, you, and the caregiver (and any other children there.) I can almost positively assure you he is just fine a few minutes after you leave (if not sooner). When you return, make a big deal of it. "Hi, I came back. I'm so glad to see you. I can see you had a great time." etc. etc.
Also, be aware, that he may think he is supposed to cry and act out when you leave. Especially if you react by making a big deal out of the crying.
Finally, do be sure to continue spending quality time with him every day. Especially during this time of adjusting to big-boy-school, where he doesn't get the one-on-one, crying can also be a result of simply not enough time with mom.
This will pass. You can find milestones of development all over the web. Google it, and look for your child's age.
Good luck.
Completely normal. However, completely irratating I hear you. My soon to be 2 year old in a matter of days does the same thing- hold me, hold me. I have another one that is 3 1/2, I do remember her doing this too, and it seemed like it lasted forever, but honestly probably only a month or two and then they go on to something new. Right now, my 2er is throwing tantrums because she can't put on her slippers, when I help her put them on, she throws a tantrum because she wants them off. Ah, the irony. I wish you luck and patience (and some bestoyed on me too).
