Child Not Sleeping

The book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Wiessbluth was a huge help for me...My 2year old has always had sleep issues and I refer back to this book quite often...Hope it Helps you too! I don't function well with no sleep!

I recommend getting a book (or 2), like the one another poster suggested... there are many theories out there on good sleep habits. My personal opinion, though, is to go with one of those that seems "harsh" and go ahead and get it over with while she's young. A friend of mine never could bring herself to let her daughter fall alseep on her own (she would lay with her or let her sleep with her brother) and as the months turned into years, she kept thinking and saying well, she's young- she'll outgrow it... She is in 3rd grade and still has sleep issues where she comes into her parents' room in the middle of the night. These problems don't often just work themselves out and I recommend you nip it now-- it will be harder to break the older she gets

Hey R.,

You're definately not alone in this problem!! My son did the exact same thing so once he turned a year I (and my husband) couldn't take it anymore! I researched sleep experts until I found Dana Obleman at www.sleepsense.net Her program worked wonders and within 3 nights my toddler was sleeping through the night! You order her program online so you can begin immediately. AND she's not entirely about "crying it out" which is a method my husband and I previously tried - it didn't work for us or our child and it made us feel uncomfortable. If you visit the site you can get a free sleep evaluation for your child's specific needs. I mean, I could tell you step by step what I did but your child is different and will require different bedtime routines/soothers, etc. Let me know if you'd like more info.... I know how frustrating it is though!! And FYI: I had asked my pediatrician several times for help and nothing they suggested ever worked - only Dana's program worked for us.

Its hard to say without knowing how long this has been going on - is it a new thing? If shes almost 2 has she just developed this or has she been sleeping with you and this is the transition phase? If it is the transition, I would definately agree with the first post - your doing a great job and consistency is the key. It may be really, really trying, but you also need to cut down your stay time with her, go into the room after shes cried a little longer, and leave a little sooner each time, cutting down the time you spend in there with her. It worked for me. Soon he would wake up crying then just get real quite and fall back asleep on his own - Good luck!!

here is what I do, I also have a 2 yr old and a 7 yr old, so I have been thru this before. You cannot comfort them back to sleep. That is the biggest mistake we make. children need to learn how to fall to sleep and back to sleep on their own, and what I think is happening is once your child wakes up she doesnt know how to fall back to sleep on her own. i wen thru this recently with my 2 yr old when we took her off of the pacifier which is another way children soothe themselves to fall asleep alone. What I did was when I went in her room, do not pick her up, just give her a hug, tell her she is okay and keep it short in there..you comforting her back to sleep is why she keeps looking for you again when she wakes up..How to solve your child's sleep problems by Dr. Steven Ferber is a great book too! Try that tonight! Good Luck! PS) I am also the wife of police officer!

Hi R..

I learned with my son that if you cater to their cries in the night, they will depend on you to comfort them. Teaching them to be independent cannot begin too soon. I, of course, don't mean not to check on them. Perhaps you could try letting her pick out a stuffed animal at the store. That may bring her comfort in the middle of the night. I am guessing that you know the absence of sugar before bed is a necessity. If they are having anything (including a little koolaid or juice) with sugar, they are bound to wake up repeatedly.

Good luck,
C.

I have gone through this very same scenario with both my 4 year old at that age and now my 2 year old. The good thing is that you are making the right decisions. The key is to buckle down and stay consistent. Dont give in until you have her sleeping consistently 6 - 8 hours a night without waking up so many times. I have my daughter down to only waking up once a night. However should she catch a cold and not feel to well she will wake up 2 - 3 times a night . I bring her to my bed only if she has fever so I can keep track of it .

You just have to be strong . It might take 1 week , 1 month or maybe even a couple of months . Every child has a different capacity to when they eventually get the point to where they say "ok this is where I have to sleep no matter what I do ". You are doing great . Just be patient and trust me it does get better. Keep doing what you are doing and this phase will be done with soon Im sure. It also helps to alternate turns with your husband in putting her back in bed. You will not feel as restless when its your turn to get up and tend to her.

And your child is not strage. I had two that have done the same thing so how could strange can your child be when another person has gone through the same thing twice . Good luck and keep me posted.

start watching super nanny. she has great tips and ideas. what i did with my twins were ignore them. at first i would go in and then i would wait a little longer each night. as long as they are fed, clean, and not hurt, a little crying is not a big deal. they know it works by crying because you come in and that is what they want. when she sees that mommy does not come running anymore and that she is not getting her way she will get bored and give up. i used ear plugs and let me say that they are a great thing at night. good luck.

this sounds straange but has she always been like this? maybe it's a food intolerance? I know that sounds odd, but I always like to rule out the 'medical' before assuming it's totally behavioral...

the most likely culprits would be milk proteins & soy proteins...these are in everything, it seems :(
you could try eliminating these things from her diet for a good 3 weeks and see if it makes any difference? Allergy testing wouldn't show an intolerance...

food for thought, as it were ;)
http://www.webmd.com/allergies/guide/problem-foods-allerg...

Hi R.,
I had this same problem with my son (now 4), who had never slept through the night on his own, ever! Same scenario with waking several times each night. I bought a great book called 'Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child' by Marc Weissbluth, and I learned a whole lot about children and sleep.
You can try what I did with my then 2 year old, and see if it works. This is what the author recommends for 2 year olds...
I am assuming that your daughter won't fall alseep on her own; you lay down with her or stay in her room until she's asleep? That's what needs to change in order to get her to fall back to sleep on her own when she wakes in the middle of the night. Here's the technique (it really works!)
Tell her that things are going to change a little bit when she goes to bed; let her know that she needs to sleep all night long and that you need to sleep all night long too!
After you go through your bedtime routine, give her that final kiss goodnight, tuck her in and then leave the room, while she's still awake. When she gets up and out of her bed, take her by the hand and put her right back in her bed. Here's the key point, DO NOT SAY A WORD WHEN YOU PUT HER BACK IN BED! Act very normally, (not mad or trying to comfort her) and put her quickly and silently in the bed. Keep repeating this as many times as you have until she stays in the bed and DO NOT TALK while you are doing it. She will cry and fuss (and if she's talking, lots of reasons why she has to stay up)but she will eventually wear herself out and will stay in bed.
The first night I tried this, my son got out of bed at least 30 times! I positioned myself out of sight but close to his bedroom so that I could return him quickly to his bed. He eventually stayed in the bed and only woke once that night. When he woke, I used the same technique.
The second night, he got out of bed twice, and then slept through the night! It got much easier after that.
If you say anything when she gets up, it just reinforces the behavior, either if it's to comfort her or you reprimand her.
If you work, best to start on a Friday night; by Sunday she will be sleeping much better!
Good luck!

If you're desperate you may consider making her a little bed next to yours, and when she wakes up she'll know you're right there and she's likely to just go right back to sleep. It's difficult choice, you'll get more sleep, but she's not likely to want to move out to her own bed for a few years.

Good luck.