Child Care for a 12 Year-Old

This child's mother knows her well enough to know whether or not she needs assistance and apparently she does.

Unfortunately, she is asking for someone's time whether it be a college student, SAHM, YMCA, or child care facility, so they should be paid. Otherwise, she is asking a favor of someone. Since that is the case, is there a friend that goes to the same school who's parents can assist? Can she have a parent assist with mornings and use the after school program at the school or YMCA? Yes, she will have to wake that child up earlier than needed, but, well, basically, too bad.

Child care facilities are a good option too, although she will have to still get between the child care and the school. Some have buses or vans to transport the children and some have a person to walk them to the school. Most of them offer an income based sliding scale.

My daughter used to get herself to and from school in 6th grade (whatever age that is) and I also caught her J-walking across a major street a few times. Sahara for those of you in the area. So while we think they are responsible, they are still kids.

I would empower her to to be at home alone. Have her take a babysitting course and/or a walk to school course/home alone course, and ask a friend or neighbour to be an emergency contact for her.

No offense, but your friend needs to teach her child, not continue to handicap her developmentally.

My boys are 10 and 11, and have been getting themselves to and from the bus stop with all their gear for 2 years now. They've NEVER missed the bus. They go to different schools at different times, so they are leaving and arriving alone. They each wear a watch.

A 12 year old should be perfectly capable of coming and going on her own. She can call mom right before she leaves the house in the morning, and right when she arrives home in the afternoon to check in. When she arrives home, she stays indoors with the doors locked, makes a snack, does homework and can watch TV or play in her room.

The rules in our house when kids are alone are: Stay inside, no cooking on the stove, nobody comes inside.

Since the boys have been alone a while now, they have been allowed to microwave a snack, but no cooking on the stove. They have been taught to use the EMS (9-1-1) properly, and when and how to use a fire extinguisher (there are three in our home). They call me at work as soon as they are home and are home alone after school for about an hour and a half.

I would say college student, neighbor, or friend from school. Another option is to see if there is a nanny in your neighborhood for another kid who might be happy and willing to start her day early.

How about a neighbor? She can leave for work and the child can walk next door when she's ready or before mom leaves for work.

The 12 year old should be able to do this herself...maybe in the morning mom could just call to make sure kid is up and ready and then after school have the kid call mom to check in.

Check if there is an in home child care in her area. They may do it.

In Oklahoma a 12 year old child can actually work in the classroom as a teachers helper. Since most child care centers just don't take kids that old they have some other options. This way the child does not feel like they are with the little kids and they learn valuable skills for later in life.

http://www.okdhs.org/NR/rdonlyres/C###-###-####-C005-45D1...

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"Teen aide" means a 13- to 15-year-old who works under the direct supervision of a master teacher and is not considered in the staff-child ratio as a staff or as a child".
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If she just can't find one that has a program like this where the cost is very minimal she is going to have to poll her neighbors who have kids the same age. Then she'll have to drop her child off on her way to work then pick them up after she gets off.

I had a friend who had to be at work by 5:30am or 6am most days of the week. She dropped her daughter off about 15 minutes before work, her daughter could be at school by 7:45 to eat breakfast. She got off at 3 or 4 and she picked her daughter up about 20 minutes after she got off work.

She paid me the same as if I were a child care center. Especially since I was transporting her child and providing an after school snack for her. She paid me $12 per day. This covered about 3-4 hours.

If she left her the whole day during the week when the kids were on break she paid me a bit more but she worked in a hotel cleaning rooms and didn't make a lot. So I didn't charge her a lot. The $12 per day was primarily to cover the cost of the gasoline taking her child to school and to feed her the one snack per day.

If your friend looks around she should be able to find someone who'll do the same for her. She needs to call the local child care centers though just to see which ones have school kid programs. These centers will have kids close to your friends child's age and she'll enjoy it more.

I would ask at the school to see if they know of any moms who do in-home daycare. My daughter goes home twice a week with a girl in her class. Also, I would try care.com. Does the school have some sort of day care set up? Most schools have some sort of childcare in place for working moms.

A 12 yr old should be pretty self sufficient to take care of this herself.

Get to/from bus stop?? Morning and afternoon?

Many children around that she are already babysitting.

Is this child special needs?

Our now 18 yr old was getting herself up and ready for school by age 10. Granted, I was SAHM/WAHM so I had contact and she had a phone.

Maybe this 12 yr old needs to learning independence!

Mom could pay the 12 yr old for making sure she holds down the fort at home independently... Win Win situation!

Your best bet for before school care is to find a mom in your area that could use a few extra $$ a week. You can ask around, the school office, parents you know, etc.

After school care would be easier. Yes, I think a college or high school (senior) would be an excellent choice.

Our school is affiliated with a before/after school care program where they bring the kids to school and pick them up. She might want to call the school and see if they have one.

Barring that, does she have a schoolmate nearby who's mom might be amenable to this situation?

I suppose since she is not yet mature/responsible enough to handle herself you could ask if one of her friends' parents would be willing to take her in the morning and get her to school. In the afternoon couldn't she take the bus to a safe public place, like the library? That's what a lot of kids do around here.

My high school cousins do not do this alone. If they did, they would NEVER get to school, let alone come with a lunch. Their parents help them.
12 is young!

If the mother qualifies for a subsidy, she can use a daycare center. They take up to age 12, and have before and after. It's a good, wholesome environment. Many open at 6am.

Our Adventure Day Camps on Lake Grapevine are for ages 4-13 and we are there Spring Break and 12 weeks in the summer. Our hours are 7am-6pm, but I can work with special requests....have even had campers dropped at my house before I leave, etc. we are going on our 10th year, and would love to have your daughter join us!!!