Do you require your child to check in with you. If child is at dads do you require they call you once a day at some point to check in? How about if child goes away with one parent or friends? Do you require they call and check in? If Yes how young and why. If No Why not.
A parent should be in contact with her child at least once a day. No matter what. It's not overprotectiveness, it's constructing a sense of family and belonging and obligation. It's important, even if it's only a "hi" and "bye"...
In my opinion, anyways...
I was more of a "you can call me if you get a chance" type of mom. I never liked having to "check in", it's suffocating and then if you forget to you have to get all nervous and feel bad and such. It can ruin a fun time to have to do the check in thing, not a burden I put on anybody. The only call I've ever asked for is when my kids or parents have to drive a LONG way to get home, I ask them to give me a call when they make it and I do the same for them.
Yes!! I require my kiddos to check in! If they are going somewhere, I want to know they got there...and if running late, I expect a call to let me know HOW late.
Even the 'olders' who no longer live at home will call 'on the way' here...or call when they have gotten back to school/duty station.
Best luck!
michele/cat
Yep. My guys like to go ATV riding for a weekend. I ask that they call me before they head out and at night so that I know they survived, and I can say good night.
My 10y is getting ready to go on his first Grandparents trip in a few days for a week. I will ask that he call every night to check in. They have been taking my 8y nephew on trips for years since age 4 and every night around 9p they call his mom.
I wouldn't call it checking in per say. It is just nice to know how your child's day is going and what they are up to. I think it creates a good relationship with the parents if the children speak with them every day even if it is only for a few min.
I tell my kids to check in once in a while if they're going to be outside riding bikes through the neighborhood all day. I don't give them a set time, but if you haven't seen my face in a few hours, you probably ought to swing by for a minute. The only instance where they've been away from me (aside from last week at camp where no phone calls were allowed) was to go to Florida with my parents & sister a couple of years ago. I didn't need to ask them to call me as they wanted to each night to tell me about that day's adventures. They're 10 & 12 now so when they were away they were 7 & 8. Little enough that they definitely wanted to talk to me every night!
My 11 year old has a cell phone for emergencies...and to keep in contact with me..
If he is at a friend's house - he needs to let me know what's going on - if they leave the house, etc.
i let my boys go over to the pool and the park by themselves...they have to call and they are NOT ALLOWED to separate...
I tell my kids to check in by such and such time. Not when they are visiting with their father because that is his time to parent and be responsible for them. If they are on your face book page you can see where they are, what they are doing and even talk to them while away at dads. I started doing that and I love it! They are both teenagers.
Yes
Yes
and Yes
I provide my son with a cell phone - it's main function is for me to contact him and vice versa. He was on vacation last week with his father and I told him I expected, at least, a text per day...didn't have to be long, just a "Hi" and a check in.
He is 15. I trust him. He is old enough to communicate his needs - the check in was more for my peace of mind. He understood that and was pretty good about maintaining contact.
Mind you my daughter is only 4.5, but no, when she's with dad or grandparents I don't have her check in. She's so attached to me, I thought it better she just be in the moment with them. That said, she only ever does over-nights and VERY rarely. I'm thinking about doing a weekend away and may call her because I miss her, but at this age, I'd text first to see if its a good time to interrupt her play. If anything is amiss, I'd receive a call or text. I want her to feel confident in and supported by dad and grandparents. If I had her check in, I wonder if she'd get the impression (or confirmation) that I really should be there.
Later on, with friends, I would DEFINITELY have her call! :-)
It's certainly not an unheard-of or outrageous thing. Back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, and I was a kid roaming my neighborhood, cell phones were big things fixed to people's kitchen walls instead, and I was required to call my mama and let her know where I was and with whom I was playing. Then she would say something loving and kind, like, "Be home before five and don't be late!"
Not only for safety reasons but also for learning-courtesy-toward-others reasons is checking in a good thing to do. And it's very friendly to punch the buttons and say, "Hi, Mom - I'm having a great time. We're at Gina's house but we're going to the beach in thirty minutes. See ya."
