Changing 14 Month Olds Bedtime Routine.

I highly recommend the book: "Healthy sleep habits, happy child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. You will walk away with many great suggestions and tips that really work just by reading a couple of chapters.

Every child is different, so take all advice as that.....advice.

But, my son had to use the cry it out method (he is very active and didn't easily slow down enough to sleep). We would have bedtime routine. Get ready for bed. Read a book or two. Get a drink of water. Then we would race to bed and I would sing a couple of songs to him. I sat in the livingroom and cried too. I hated it, but it did do the trick for me. It took about a month and he finally figured out that was bedtime.

My first daughter was a lot easier. She took to the bedtime routine right away. No questions.

My second daughter just wanted to be like her older siblings. So, she would get to go up and say goodnight to them, then it was her turn and mom and dad would do the same for her. She loved it. It made her feel like one of the big kids.

A.
Work at home mom of 3

We have a 14 month old little boy and I thought I'd share our bed time routine in case it helps. We eat supper at 5:30, play all together for a while, then when it gets about 7:00 we tell him it's time for "night-night" and he voluntarily walks over to the stairs to head up to get ready for bed. We bathe him every other night, then we give him vitamins, brush his teeth, put on lotion, and read a Bible story. Then daddy takes him and they walk around upstairs saying "night-night" to everything. He brings him into his bed room and I'll rock and snuggle with him for maybe 5 minutes and then I'll lie him down in his crib (most of the time he's still awake but pretty drowsy). I wave to him and blow him a kiss and he usually falls asleep without any fussing at all usually by around 7:30/7:45. He usually wakes up about 7 or 7:30 and still takes two hour to hour and half naps during the day.
It hasn't always been this easy. I find that when we have a lot going on and we get out of routine or keep him up late then he has a harder time falling asleep and sleeping through out the night. Personally it sounds like you're putting your little one to bed to late. Maybe try for a few weeks switching up your routine and putting the younger child to bed first and see how it goes. There's always an adjustment period, but stick with it and it will pay off. Another piece of advice is maybe rock/snuggle with her in her bedroom.. not the living room. THere might be too many distractions or maybe she isn't associating that area with sleep as she gets older. Good luck finding what works best for you guys, just thought I'd share in case you were hearing what another mama of a 14 month old does :)

sounds like you definitely need to change some things. The good thing is that you can still have some snuggling time with your child. Read a book and snuggle for a while, but then put her down at her bedtime! Its ok to let her cry, lay down the rules, that she can have a book read and a lullaby sung, but then she needs to lay in her bed by herself. Hope it helps!

S.,
I have a 13 month old. After his bottle, my husband takes him to his nursery to put him to bed. We have a rocking chair in there, and my husband rocks him, in the dark, and says prayers with him. He used to stay there until he fell asleep rocking, and then would put him in his crib, however, over time he gradually rocked him for less and less time, so that now, he is in there for maybe 5 minutes, and then he puts our son down and he's still awake. Sometimes he will fuss, but he usually doesn't, and he'll fall asleep on his own, which is great because he does need to learn this. I would suggest that you figure out what routine will be hers, and then just shorten the rocking/cuddling time by a few minutes each night, until you might get to the point where she starts learning to soothe herself to sleep. I have never had to let him "cry it out." If there is a particular night where he seems to be having a rough time of it and is crying a lot, we'll go back in and comfort him either picking him up again and rocking a little longer, or just patting him and letting him know its okay, go back to sleep, etc. Some crying is bound to be involved, and when my husband at first started putting him down before he was fully asleep and he would cry a bit, I used to get a little irritated thinking "you didn't hardly cuddle with him at all!" but now that he can fall asleep on his own, I have realized it was a good thing. If its too hard for you to hear her cry, maybe your husband is better at doing the night routine and you can go somewhere in the house to not hear the crying as much.

hi S.,
i think it's great that you have cuddle time before bed. i would try an earlier bedtime with your daughter. i highly recommend the book "the no cry sleep solution: gentle ways to get your child to sleep through the night" it is a wonderful book and gives advice that keeps the child's best interest at heart.

our night time routine looks like this:
dinner @5:30
playtime with daddy
bath around 6:45
jammies on
sit in bed with water and a bit of toast while reading our good night butterfly book
nurse
then singing and cuddles until she falls asleep usually around 7:30.

i try to keep it calm with dim lights once we begin bath time to help her unwind. choose a new routine and stick to it. she will slowly adjust and night time should become much easier. i wouldn't let her cry (firmly against it) and you don't have to give up your time together. my dd is 17 months old and having a set routine that begins earlier in the evening and is consistent has made a world of difference. good luck!

Aren't kids great? As soon as you establish a routine, they go and change it on you! Have you tried rocking her for a certain amount of time and then putting her in her crib if she doesn't fall asleep? She may not cry at all. Some kids adapt a lot better to change than others. I also rock my daughter at night. We have milk at 8 and we rock until 8:50. At that time, she brushes her teeth. I give her big hugs and kisses and daddy tucks her into bed. She has a music box and we play that for her every night. She's usually asleep by the time the music stops playing. Of course, now that I've said that she'll go and change it on me tonight! I'm definitely not a fan of cry it out for infants, but toddlers are a different story. At this point they know that crying gets you stuff. Whatever you do, make sure you tell her what you're doing and why. People say that toddler can't understand and I think that's BS! My little girl understood stuff very early on. She may not have understood everything, but she got the idea. When you put her in her bed, be excited! Hooray! You're going to fall asleep ALL BY YOURSELF tonight! WOW! What a big girl! and so on. Don't be afraid to put her blanket in with her or even a stuffed animal or two. She may just play till she falls asleep. Let me know how it turns out!!!!

Great job for keeping the crib in your room! That's where she belongs! And I really encourage you to get Elisabeth Pantley's "No Cry Sleep Solution". Wonderful easy to read book with tons of options for adjusting the routine without traumatizing them! It worked wonders for me! Good luck! And kudos for not wanting to let her cry. People will tell you to do that and it is never, ever, ever, the right thing to do.

I would hold her and read her a book then lay her in her crib, rub her back, sing a few soft songs, put some soft music on and leave the room. She may fuss a little or cry at first but if you refuse to get her back up and just go in and rub her back and sing her another song in a couple of weeks she should be all right. Then go in and go to bed at your regular time. She is old enough to cut back on napping and you might do that to help her go to bed earlier at night as well.

my 3 kids have been on a bed schedule since they were born and it works wonders.. they are now 10 9 and 6. first i would fix supper at 5pm and then between the time it took them to eat usually 1/2 hr and i let them play video games or watch tv or read something to calm them down. then at 7pm i have them get their baths/showers and by 730 they all 3 are done and they get their bedtime story and brush teeth drink of water and go bathroom so i dont hear excuses and by 8 they are in bed so i leave nightlight or a room across from them light on and say their prayers, kiss and hug and they go to sleep. it might take a while as its new to your kids but its well worth it!!

How many naps is she taking? It may be as simple as going down to only one nap a day, or making that one nap shorter if she's already down to one nap. Every single time my kids sleeping routines started getting messed up, I always fixed it with a nap adjustment. My son was only 2 1/2 when he gave up his nap completely, which to me was sooooo young, but he was sleeping 12 hours straight a night, so still getting plenty of rest.

I too have a 14 month old girl, she was born 11/29/07 and her crib is practically in our room too. I am 27 and work full time as well as volunteer for several groups. So, sometimes our schedule isn't the same from day to day. I don't believe in setting a child's schedule in stone as they will not be able to be flexible as they grow older. I have seen how some of my cousins do that and if their kids don't have their nap at a certain hour they are little terrors and sometimes they miss out on family events because of nap time. Anyway, I agree with the post about getting her in bed earlier. If you are like me that is a challenge. If she is in bed by 8:30 I consider that a huge accomplishment. If we don't have something going on, our schedule is usually supper at 6-6:30 (hard to get supper ready before that when you get off work at 5), play time until 7:30. Then bath time, maybe read a book and say a pray, but my little girl doesn't sit still for long. Then we usually cuddle for about 5 minutes - walking around and singing - she doesn't like to rock much - and then off to bed. I try to put her down drowsy, not fast asleep. The last couple nights though she has almost instantly fallen asleep when I put her on my shoulder. The nights we walked around a lot she must've been teething. If that is the case for you try baby orajel and/or tylenol. If she tries to get back up and cry instead of going to sleep, I usually lower myself to her level in the crib and let her hug me and I rub her back. Then I ask her to lie down. Usually she will do that and hug her glow worm. She has learned how to make her "Dolly" play music, so it is very comforting to her and me since she doesn't cry very long. If she were to start crying a lot and I could tell she just wasn't winding down, I would most definitely pick her back up and comfort her. No sense in getting her worked up, it just takes twice as long to get her to go sleep. She does usually sleep about 10 hours at night and then takes a couple naps during the day at day care. Usually on the weekends that we are home she will take a three hour nap during the middle of the day and that is it. Good luck!