Career Mom Switching to Stay at Home - Need Advice and Suggestions!!!

Updated on May 16, 2009
L.J. asks from Dallas, TX
13 answers

Hi Ladies,
I am switching from a Marketing Manager job to being a full stay at home mom. While I am SO EXCITED! to stay home with my little man, I can't help but be a little nervous about the following things: I want to go back to work when my kids start school and I don't want to be out of the loop careerwise. What can I do to stay in the loop? Also, my husband and I can cover all of our bills but its the day to day things that where we will need to watch our spending. He is building fences on the side of his normal job to support us. I also need some suggestions on fun activities during the day! I currently work Monday - Thursday and this will be a big but very good change! Any financial, career or activities advice? Thank you :)

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L.S.

answers from Dallas on

My advice would be to get in contact with a local MOMS Club or other similar organization. They've been a life saver for me in making the transition from working to staying at home. It's not expensive and most chapters stick with low cost activities (ie park days, etc). Good luck!

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L.W.

answers from Dallas on

Congratulations on getting to stay at home! I was so worried about money when I first quit, I clipped coupons and learned to be very thrifty. I had never cooked, but I learned how to prepare delicious, inexpensive meals. The Sunday paper is a worthwhile investment. I also learned how to find cheap entertainment. Story times at the library and Barnes and Noble are good. I was in a play group that put out a montly calendar. We did something that cost money only once per month. Mostly we did parks and brought our lunch. The Owens Farm is free and fun. My family gave me memberships to the zoo, science place, dallas world aquarium and Dallas Children's museum so we always had some place to go when it rained. I always packed a lunch to avoid that expense. As far as staying in the loop, check to see if there is a pre-school PTA in your area. Having a leadership role in a PTA looks good on a resume. As for grown up entertainment, potluck with friends is easy, cheap and fun. Create your own 'dinner club.' Have fun!

1 mom found this helpful
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D.C.

answers from Austin on

Hi L.,
I had read a bit on this back when my son was born and I was feeling horrible leaving him at day care and going to work (hiring a nanny, as well as working a couple of days a week from home, helped me to feel better about it, since he got 1:1 attention and I would still be able to see him, so I've not looked into it since 2007).

Most of these articles advised staying in contact with people in your industry---through industry events (but those can be pricey), networking websites, continuing to meet with your colleagues for the occasional lunch, keeping up with your industry on the web through special mailgroups, publications, etc.

You could also do a little volunteering for pro bono work, or even do a little paid consulting as an independent consultant, with any (few) extra hours you may have during the week, to keep something on your resume.

I hope this helps!!

EDIT: I just thought of something else. If you can take a bit of training during your extended leave, or achieve a new certification in your specialty, or some related "hot" technology, then you could do that, too. Online courses are especially flexible and can be done an hour or two at a time. Good luck!

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N.M.

answers from Dallas on

Someone else suggested the MOMS Club, and I agree 100%. Most local MOMS Clubs have activities 2-4 days a week - playgroups at someone's house, park days, walking clubs, etc. I joined when my son was a year old and it was a real sanity saver - I don't like being stuck in the house! We also have a FW zoo membership, so we go there pretty often, as well as library story times, rec center classes (tumbling, art, etc.), and Kindermusik (LOVE Kindermusik - can't say enough good things about it!). As your son gets bigger, you'll find that indoor play areas are your best friend when it gets really hot or really cold outside.

I haven't gone back to work full time yet, so I don't have a lot of advice there, but the biggest thing I'm doing toward that end is staying in touch with old colleagues, particularly supervisors from whom I might need a referral or reference in the future. Early on, I'd go back to my office and have lunch with the people there, but in the past 4 years they've scattered across the metroplex, so now we mainly keep in touch via Facebook. My old director has contacted me twice about positions she thought I'd be good for, and even though I turned them down, it felt nice to know she remembered me!

My money-saving tips are: 1) shop at consignment sales or resale shops for your son's clothes - lots of variety at a fraction of the cost, and most clothes have very little wear. 2) TJ Maxx and Ross have lots of name-brand things, from home decor to bath stuff to toys, and we buy a huge portion of our Christmas and birthday gifts there at a fraction of the cost. 3) If you're like me and enjoy eating out, invest in the Entertainment Book for your area (either Dallas or FW). It has lots of buy-one-get-one free meals at nicer restaurants as well as fast food places, plus coupons for other activities.

Good luck as you transition, and have fun! Staying home with my kids has been the best decision of my life, and I dread the day when I have to go back to work!

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M.D.

answers from Dallas on

L.,

Congrats on your decision. I know it wasn't made lightly. I agree with one of the comments that you might be surprised when you don't want to go back. When they start school there is still lots to do and be involved in as well. Mom's Groups are good. I have a family membership to the Zoo and the Arboretum. The kids never get tired of going there. We also go to the Gallery and play on yucky days and you can't go to the park. You can always make it a mission to try a new park everytime you go. There really is so much to do in the Dallas area. I also recommend getting Dave Ramsey's book and applying his principles. Even though you are fine now on one salary I love his philosophy of living.

I recommend making sure you have a LinkedIn account and that it is up to date with referrals and reading articles on your industry to stay current. You might want to look at an at home business at some point...maybe not. Facebook is another great way of staying in touch with friends, family and colleagues.

Mostly enjoy your time because they grow up and change so quickly!

Cheers,
M. D.
WineShop At Home
www.grapetasteathome.com

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L.N.

answers from Dallas on

Hi, L., I just ran across your message and had a couple of things to mention.

I heard about MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) from a client awhile back. She loved it; you can search for a group in your area, and find lots of neat stuff on their website: www.mops.org.

I can't remember if anyone mentioned the Dallas Arboretum on Garland Rd. A wonderful place to spend time!

For worthwhile activities, you might also explore www.musikgarten.org, a fantastic early childhood music and movement program. Most, if not all, studios offer a FREE class for you and your child to attend together before you sign up.

As an aside, I warmly applaud your decision to stay home with your child. I did that, with incredible returns in the longrun. I found creative ways to make money (took a class on cake decorating and wound up becoming a professional decorator out of my home for a couple of years; developed a part time soloist career at my church for weddings, parties, funerals, etc.--Lesson? Listen to your inner desires, there may be a special talent trying to come out!) I took a class and learned to sew, and sewed all my clothes and my daugher's for several years. When baby #2 came along, my sewing time disappeared. ;0) I tried to save money every way I could! Today my two daughters are grown, we are very close, and they are two of my closest friends. I wish the same for you and your son. All the best to you and your family, L. ~

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N.S.

answers from Dallas on

L.,
Good for you for staying home! You and your little one have many memories to make! I was a career mom for several years, until my son came along and he needed me around more. I tried a few home-based businesses, but the training was poor and I didn't do well. About 3 years ago, I stumbled on AmeriPlan, which is unlike anything else I had ever seen. I have the privilege of helping others find affordable health care while building a business with excellent income and having the flexibility I need for my family. Here is the link if you would like to check it out. It never hurts to look! www.HomeMommy.biz Best wishes to you! ~ N.

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K.E.

answers from Dallas on

Brace yourself. You may not ever want to go back to work! You will get involved in their schools and not want them in after care. You will ENJOY being at home. However, if you cannot imagine life without work or cannot manage on one salary you have to stay current with technology as it changes so quickly it will make your head spin.

You can plug into community college courses/online courses to stay updated on different computer programs etc.

If there is a professional association, keep going to meetings so your face is out there. For instance, the film community has Texas Association of Film Tape Professionals, the graphic designers and photographers have DSVC ( Dallas Society of Visual Communications).

If you have the opportunity to do some consulting from home or to even do a couple of hours while your child is napping, keep your hand in that way. It's a lot easier to keep one oar in the water than go into dry dock for years!

Now, fun, Geeze, where to start. The Dart Train is your best friend. When your child is walking you can take the train to Union Station and let them run through the underground tunnel to the Hyatt, then ride the escalator up to the coffee shop, refuel and head back to the train. WEARS them out!
Get a membership at the Science Place in Fair Park. There is an indoor sandbox and when it is rainy or so hot you can't imagine being outdoors, it is a life saver.

Get a bike and an attachment for the kiddo and bike around the lake, you will stay in shape and they will have a blast.

The Dallas Arboretum has activities for little ones on certain mornings, check that out.

The central library downtown is wonderful place. They have morning readings in the kids area and puppet shows, all sorts of things.

Daily expenses.Keep a daily record of every single penny you spend for a month. Then you can go back and figure out where you can cut back. Your coffee is better than Starbucks any day! Pick up Dave Ramseys book at the library and follow his advice.

Enjoy your "mom" time. They grow up faster than you are ever prepared for.

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S.C.

answers from Dallas on

I left my career two years ago when my daughter was almost three. I started a business with a partner so I have flexibility to be with my daughter but also can work (she's in preschool now, so my situation is a little different than yours). Get involved in moms' groups as a volunteer, keep up your work connections (e.g. LinkedIn suggestion someone else made), volunteer with nonprofits doing marketing work, etc.

What to do during the day depends on where you're located. I love the Dallas Arboretum, visits to Northpark Mall to see the ducks and turtles and visits to the Museum of Nature & Science at Fair Park. The memberships with the Arboretum and Science Museum are worth it if you go frequently. Both have kids activities on certain days of the week.

There are several bloggers in the area who write about how to save money on groceries, etc. If you're interested, you can learn more on my blog and also access some of the others at www.cravingthesavings.com. I've saved so much money using coupons matched with sales since I started in early 2008. I wish I started this when I was still working because I'd have a lot of money to put away in savings!

Good luck with your transition!

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K.B.

answers from Dallas on

My sister works in the Marketing field and she started contracting out work - super part time that was very flexible time-wise. Now she picks up a few things here and there during the year - just to keep her in the loop.
I would think there would be companies that could facilitate those type of opportunities - she networked through past employers.

I work 3 days a week and I'm finding that I love that - I still am somewhat involved in my old company but still have 4 great days home with my 15 month daughter.

As far as activities - I would check out libraries for story times or see if your neighborhood has an association that you could meet other mom's for play dates, etc. I'm currently on the look out for the same in my neighborhood.

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M.C.

answers from Dallas on

Hi L.,

Congratulations! I made the same decision almost 4 years ago after balancing work and family as a corporate manager for 17 years...8 of them with children in the mix. I loved my job but I loved my kids more. I wish I had listened to my heart a lot earlier and done this when my first baby was only 1 like yours is. These years are so precious!

My solution to the $$ challenge was to find a business I am passionate about and do it from home. For me, it was nutrition...I am committed to helping families get healthy and I get paid to talk about something I love talking about anyway. I've got so much time freedom now, I will never go back to a corporate job!

My business is doing so well I am expanding and looking for 1 or 2 key people in the DFW area to join my team of champions. Email me if you would like to be considered.

Good luck with this next exciting chapter of your life!

M.

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J.D.

answers from Dallas on

You should find a Jazzercise in your neighborhood www.jazzercise.com and enter your zip you'll need the one hr break a day and they have fabulous sitters for free also the libraries have good story times and puppet shows for 1 yr olds good luck w your transition

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C.M.

answers from Dallas on

In response to staying up on your career and not getting left out of the loop, I have to encourage you to stay up to date in your industry (or just any industry that will allow you to come back to work). I have several friends who were 15+ year career women before kids and after they decided their full time stay at home was done, they'd come back to work and they had a really hard time finding a job because the world had passed them by.

All that being said, you don't want your child's baby-hood to pass you by either!!

I just urge you to stay connected with other career people... do it through Facebook/Linked In, etc. if nothing else!!

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