Can't Get My Husband to Go on a Cruise with Our Daughter

Updated on November 05, 2007
M.R. asks from Moreno Valley, CA
15 answers

HELP!!!!!! It's a suprise cruise for my moms cousins birthday and I really want my daughter & her dad to go on the 4-day cruise next year with me but her father thinks it's to dangerous so he says he'll stay behind with her while I go and enjoy with the rest of my family. Okay I did forget to mention her age she'll be two this December. It's Carnival Cruise and they have children accomadations abord the ship.
It looks like so much fun I just wish we all could enjoy this little weekend getaway.

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B.S.

answers from San Diego on

Tell him that it is not too dangerous! Obvisouly she'll be watched by the family. And they do have a Camp Carnival (age 2 and up because I recently inquired) for children that children always have fun in - from what I have heard. My brother, when he was young, used to do the kids camp on a cruise with my family and he loved it! The ship is huge and safe, as long as you don't let her wander off, which it would just be like keeping an eye on her when you're at home. Tell him to relax, thousands of kids of all ages cruise each year, and to come along and have a blast. Cruises are great!

(And if that is not convincing enough, I'll take his spot :) )

B.

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V.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

The only way to get your husband to go is to talk with him and arm him with knowledge about cruising.

Cruises are great fun. Honestly, your daughter is probably too young for it to be particularly memorable for her - but it would be a shame for your husband to miss out.

Essentially, it'd be just like going on any other vacation with a toddler - you have to be aware of what they're doing all the time and sometimes that can distract from the experience of the trip. But they do have the Camp Carnival which, when we cruised last year, had accommodations for children 2 and up. This will keep your daughter entertained if she's already used to a day-care-like environment; and they have babysitting at night (from 10pm to like 3am). Note that camp carnival is not open all day - they take breaks, and the timing of those breaks can be sucky sometimes.

The cabins are smallish, but I've stayed in cabins with three twin beds (some that pull out from the wall like bunk beds) and other cabins one kings-size bed (two twin beds pushed together). Your daughter may have to sleep with the two of you.

The food is abundant and the room service is absolutely free.

Find out what your husband objects to and work together to see if the two of you can come to an agreement. If he flat out doesn't wanna go, then you go and have a great time and don't feel guilty about it!

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

You didn't mention....How old is your daughter??? Is there a reason her Dad thinks it's too dangerous? I mean, I have heard lots of news stories about how stomach sicknesses have spread on these cruise ships, and once in awhile people falling off the ship? Is it a "child friendly" cruise line? I would consider the age of your daughter, the amenities on the cruise ship, the health of your daughter or any other physical concerns or needs she has or not, and certainly the safety of your daughter. If it is mostly an "adults" type of group going with you, and no other children...then, maybe having a baby/child along with you may not be the most....convenient....one of you will have to tend to your child...and watch her and take turns. Certainly, it is only a 4-day cruise. It sounds like fun. I would just consider ALL points... and the activities you want to do when on the trip, to see if it is appropriate for a young child/baby. Certainly, flying on a plane and driving in a car are potentially dangerous too. But, as parents, we all take precautions to make sure we are transporting our child in a safe and law abiding manner. Sometimes, we fear taking our child somewhere because of a "gut instinct" or because we feel it's not appropriate at a given time. I have had those experiences as well... and sometimes it has turned out to be a good thing...instincts tell us things that in hindsight, we are thankful for later. But hear out your partner, and see what you can both decide on, for the best interest of your daughter. Good luck.
~Susan
www.cafepress.com/littlegoogoo

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E.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

hmmm maybe if you got a quote directly from the cruiseline about the safety accomodations that would help.

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J.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I understand why he thinks it's dangerous, given the "going overboard" and mass sickness reports. But I think the overboards were adults in strange situations. However, I've been on Carnival and I don't remember there being much for a child that young to do. The wonderful things about the cruise is not having to make decisions or have worries, and losing track of time. I would think that having a young child in the (small) cabin would defeat the purpose. I wouldn't want to do it.

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C.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I don't know what your husband is specifically worried about, but the only dangerous thing that I've read about cruises (in Good Housekeeping Magazine)that set them apart from any other vacation is the lack of medical care- there is an on board doctor, but they don't have to be from America & therefore may practice medicine very differently than what you're used to, plus if you need emergency care, they will take you to the nearest port hospital & leave you there to fend for yourself. The article was about trying to get legislation to strictly monitor on board medical care.

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A.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I don;t know anything about cruising, but we have traveled extensively with our daughter since she was born. The important thing about family travel is making sure you know what you want from your vacation. If you're looking to unwind, spend quality time visiting, or take in all the fun of a cruise (long dinners, gambling, shows) then it might be better to just go by yourself. If you're looking to hang at the pool with your family and spend lots of time relaxing in the cabin (naps, early bedtimes) then I think it would be ok to take your baby. Just be hyper vigilent when you're near the sides of the boat!!!

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E.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

My husband's family is going on a 5 day Carnival cruise to Cabo in 4 weeks. We are taking my 14 month old daughter (she will be almost 15 months) and we don't see any reason why not to. We have been planning this all year long. We are really looking forward to it. Tell your husband he has nothing to worry about. They accomodate toddlers all the time - she will have a blast!

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J.K.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi..
Last year my family and I went on a 4 day cruise and had the best time. We had children with us ranging from 18 months to 16 years old. The crew members are very accomidating and helpful with all of your needs as a parent. They also have daytime daycare where they go on little tours and have pizza parties. They do crafts and play games. All of the kids that we took STILL talk about the "ship trip". I think it would be great for your family to go TOGETHER..
Hope I helped you...at least a little..
J.

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H.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

We are planning a 5 day cruise next month with our 2 yr old.

Fun Factor: cruising with a 2 yr old you have to accept that you are with a 2 yr old. You can't (and shouldn't even) go into bars/dancing/late night clubs with a 2 yr old. She won't be old enough for the day camp (at least by herself, without you). So if hanging out by the pool, digging in the sand at the ports, exploring, playing in the kids area is your idea of a great time (it is for me) you'll have a great time with her.

Illness Factor: Ask your doctor about children's airborne. Also avoid foods that she isn't used to. And bring lots of hand sanitizer.

Safety: When is the last time a cruise line ship sank? There is no need for your daughter to go anywhere near the decks of the ship. You can be sure my daughter won't be looking over the side. Take a leash if she likes to wander or strap her into a small stroller. And never assume anyone else you are cruising with is watching her.

Other than that it should be loads of fun. It is all about who you are, what you want, and what is important to you. If you want to hang out in the nightclubs and bars then by all means leave her at home.

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M.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

Two is a little young for a cruise. Although there are children accomodations, unless it is a cruise with a specific theme for kids and an organized group planning it, I would have to agree with your husband. We took my 4 year old on a cruise with us and although we had a wonderful time and so did he, we could not go into bars, dancing in the night clubs and casino (if the boat has one). Yes during the day you can go swimming, but if I remember correctly the main pool said no kids under 10. There was a kids pool and water fountain on the back of the ship, but to spend the day on the back of the ship with other kids is not quite utilizing your cruise. Most ships do have kids clubs, but why put your daughter in a club playing with other kids while you have fun if that is what she does during the week (daycare). Also there is a charge for that. Also if you daughter is not wanting to play and she is crying they will call you to pick her up. Remember it is a cruise and the kids are needing fun too and if there is a crying kid they will want you to come her them. Most dinners are very formal and if your 2 year old will sit during dinner, Kudos to you :) They do not have much of a kids menu either at the more formal restaurants. They do have buffet available, but why eat at the buffet every night?

Oh and one more thing, usually you are stopping somewhere to get off the ship. The main thing you will probably do is go shopping. Again if you can have your daughter sit for 3 or 4 hours while you shop the city, Kudos again. If there is no shopping usually it is barhopping and dancing. Especially if it is Mexico.

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L.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

I just got back from a wonderful 4 day cruise myself (w/ my husband). It was the first vacation w/o our 2 girls (9mo and 2 yrs). We did observe many families w/ their children, and Carnival did have a program where you can leave them there to engage w/ other kids. The groups are broken up by ages. I wonder if your husband is afraid of cruising and is using the baby as an excuse. I know people that use the patches, and if not, they can give you meds on the ship. What would he do if you make the decision to go w/ your child? Look through the Carvinal website to get info on first time cruisers, and what there is to do, that may ease his mind. These ships are not dangerous, if so how would they be able to fill them up w/ thousands of cruisers? Good luck.

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N.A.

answers from Los Angeles on

when my daughter was two we took her on a week cruise to the carribean she did fine and had a blast, but one thing you should know to go in the children programs you have to be 3 and potty trained so she would have to be with you the whole time, when we went my step son was 9 so everday he just wanted to be in the kids thing because they do lots of activitys, i don't think it dangerous and my daughter had lots of fun being on a big boat, hope this helps

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M.W.

answers from Los Angeles on

Dangerous? What's dangerous? I went on a family cruise with my 1-year-old and 4-year-old last year. My suggestion would be to take FULL advantage of the children's activities (although I'm not sure what they have available for under 3) and possibly upgrade to a bigger cabin. It was a little stressful but such a special celebration that we didn't want to miss it! Hopefully you can get him to join you but, if not, maybe you can enjoy the time away.

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S.C.

answers from Houston on

Hi M.,

First of all, I've been on two Carnival Cruises in my lifetime and they are not at all dangerous, besides the fact that there has been some "Norwalk Disease" going around onboard cruise ships, which is basically the stomach flu and if you have a strong immune system you will be unaffected even if it's floating around. But what I really wanted to tell you was that I just turned 30 last Februaury and my best girlfriend from college and I took my two year old daughter to Puerto Vallarta to a 5 star all inclusive family oriented (they had a children's daycare and nanny's for nightime) resort called Dreams (!) and I have to warn you... I didn't feel like I was on vacation until the moment I got home!!!! My friend and I were eating our gormet dinner in the hallway as not to wake my precious little one who goes to bed at 7:15pm. We couldn't leave the room, talk loudly, or even watch tv! It was so tough having her on vacation, lugging all of her stuff and keeping her close to me at all times. There's no independence and children are totally thrown for a loop when they are out of their element. And on a cruise, you will have to really really trust another human being with your daughter as she could fall over the side of the boat- or you will have to live like a hawk searching for food. It is really really tough. My advice would be to go and enjoy yourself, really. I left my husband at home as well, and he of course (we) paid for this very expensive 2+ week trip to PV and now all I hear about is how I got to go on vacation, and how I had all this time to relax, I want to scream and yell- IT WAS THE FARTHEST THING FROM VACATION THAT I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED!!!!! And my daughter is the easiest, sweetest little angel of a child. She is so well mannered and a total delight. If that weren't the case, i think i would have flown home early! It's like the work of being at home times 5 taking them out on a vacation. NO downtime whatsoever. I did end up leaving her with a nanny because it was my birthday and we had this incredible spa there and I wanted a massage, the whole nine yards and to go out that night. I returned to a nanny fast asleep on the couch of our hotel room with my daughter wandering around with a juice box (which she's never been aloud to have) and the TV blarring Dora the Explorer!!! Think about it. Not trying to rain on your parade, but i never dreamt i would come home from my vacation and go, "Ahhhhhhhh, NOW i can relax!!!"

:)

Good luck! In the end it was worth it to give her the experience of flying internationally and getting her passport and seeing the beautiful beaches and different culture, but the LAST thing it was, was relaxing!!

Take care,

S.

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