Can Men and Women Be Friends? - Fort Riley,KS

Only if you are not attracted to the man/other person, or if the other person is the spouse or significant other of a best friend, in my opinion. Men who are like brothers to me are typically husbands of good friends of mine, also friends with my husband. However, men I am attracted to who have no tie to my family or to my husband, or even to me outside of somewhere like the workplace or gym, cannot be friends. Once I am attracted to someone, forget it... if I was alone with that person and we were just "hanging out as friends", things could get out of hand quickly. Yes, I am thinking of a co-worker as I write this, who I luckily don't see that often, but when I do, YIKES. I have to watch myself.

Just my $0.02 based on my own personal experience!

Most definitely. One of my best friends was a guy I met in college. There was nothing between us but friendship for almost 30 years. He passed away a couple of years ago and I still feel the void. I miss him a lot.

Yes they can. There will always be people out there befriending people because they are attracted or pining for their friends, or having crushes on certain friends, but there are also countless sincere, platonic male/female friendships. Every male I know is my friend and nothing more. Except my husband. And he's not my friend right now :)

Yes! I have male friends. Hopefully you have a brother, have you ever considered having sex with your brother, same feelings. Any time I even think of sex with one of my friends I get that same ewww gross, feeling I would if someone suggested sex with my brother.

As I am typing this my nose is wrinkled up thinking about it.

Gross!!

of course. ridiculous (and immature) to think otherwise.
:/ khairete
S.

I think they can. HOWEVER, if you ask Harry (Billy Crystal) from "When Harry Met Sally" you can listen to a whole tirade on this subject! :)

ETA: I love that movie, Theresa! :)

YES.
Of course.
Not everything is sexual or has to go there.
Friends are friends.
Even if you are married or not or single or not.
I have had, and have many guy friends. They are buddies.
They know that and I know that.
No problem.

Of course they CAN....does it always *stay* just a friendship? Well, that depends on the people involved. Some don't take their vows as seriously as others and let themselves get into situations where things get out of hand.

For example, IF I were ever sexually attracted to a male friend of mine, I would ensure that the two of us were never in an intimate setting alone. Not that I would do anything, but why take the chance of more feeling developing?

That said, I have many male friends that I am close with. They are attractive men, but I'm not attracted TO them. That makes a difference.

no I do not think it's possible. At some point in time, the man or woman will be attracted to each other. You might not plan on it happening, but it will at some point.

Yep, I have several males that have been my best friends. And I wouldnt touch them with a stick, but I love them like we are related. :)

Yes, if both of them behave like adults and honor their commitments. It doesn't matter if one or the other of them is attractive, or even if they are attracted to each other-- if they can both be mature and understand that there are boundaries and limits-- and to focus the friendship on what's appropriate (shared interests, mutual friends) it should be fine.

I think so. Although, most of the male friends I have had over the years would have deinitely been interested in more. I am not saying Im all that or anything lol, but one of my best guy friends flat out said that once a guy gets to know a woman and sees how "great" she is at being a supportive ear, taking care of them to some degree (it's in our nature) that most of the time the man starts to see the women in the relationship light. But if you or him lays it out and makes it clear that its just a friendship I think it can work.
Now that I am married, I don't go out and hang w/ guys friends without my husband. Out of respect for him. I'd never ever cheat on my spouse but I think it would make him uncomfortable to a degree. But he has no problem hanging out as a group.
It all depends on the situation I guess. But yes, I think its possible!

I would have LOVED to have male friends but unfortunately it never happened as attraction got always in the way :-(
So, sadly, the statistic is negative for me.

Yes, both my husband and I have good friends of the opposite sex. Never been any problems.

It depends on the two people and their spouses.

In some cases yes and in some cases no. I've seen several marriages broken because the other partner kept their spouse hungry for intimacy and the hungry spouse became intimate with the other friend.

Good luck to you and yours.

Yes. I have several guy friends that I am good friends with and do not want to sex. My husband also has several friends that are females. I do not feel threatened. In fact...I would think it was awkward if neither of us had friends of the opposite sex.

Absolutely! I have had more male friends than female my entire life. I am not a raging hormone monster nor are my male friends. I like a person because I like their company, simple.

Yes absolutetly. I would agree with 8kidsdad that not everyone can be "just friends" though.

Why couldn't they? Until I had a baby, most of my friends were male.

Ahahaha, LoveTeaching Math!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8kpYm-6nuE

:)

I believe it is entirely possible.

Me myself? I'm a ladies lady. My close friends are almost exclusively intense, quirky, tomboy, fire cracker women. Most of my women friends usually get along with men more than they do women. I'm trend breaker!

I have friends who are men. And I like hanging out with them quite a lot. One stay at home dad friend of mine is a great play date buddy because he's not afraid of the rain or mud :-) However, for whatever reason, I just haven't gotten emotionally close/intimate (in a platonic setting) with a man in...well...I don't know that I have ever been as close to men as I have been with the women in my life.

Huh.

My husband seems to only open up with women. I am really grateful that he reaches out to our female friends. They are hugely supportive to the growth and evolution of our family system.

Yep. Sex doesn't get in the way. In college, most of my close friends were men. The downside is, in my experience, that they aren't as good at keeping in touch. :-p

Yes they can, if they can handle it. I have a very good male friend, and occasionally we meet for lunch. My husband always gives me 20 bucks and tells me to have a good time.

Yes, but it's not true for everyone.

Yes, I have several good male friends. I also have several good female friends. My social sphere is well-rounded. <- Ha, punny!

It depends on the person though. I am acquainted with a woman that has no close female friends and a large circle of male friends. She's the type of woman that is unable to be platonic and thrives on attention, so at some point she's flirted, fooled around or slept with all of the men she hangs around with, married or not. She doesn't have female friends because she can't be trusted, basically. She asked me about it once, and I was straight with her, but she plays the victim and doesn't change her behavior. She chooses to think other women are jealous of her.

I know men that are a good buddy to women, and I know men that are dogs and will try to be 'friends with benefits'. So it really comes down to the individual.

Yes, but only if both parties understand that nothing more will come of it. 90+% of my friends are men...actually, now that I think of it, I only have 1 or 2 female friends, the rest are all guys.

The thing is, my husband knows I would never stray. He trusts me. My friends know I would never step out on my husband, so they don't even think of me like that. So we're just friends. (Except for me and my best friend...we're practically brother and sister.)

Most definitely. I have many male friends with whom I have no desire to have sex, and who have never expressed any desire to have sex with me.

! ! !
Of course!!!!
I have had male friends my whole life, and am now old post-menopausal, and no, there is nothing romantic nor sexual!!!!!!!!!!!!! Not even after approaching half a century.

The people who say otherwise are limited my their own personalities and such, and absolutely cannot speak for the rest of us!

I have loved only very VERY few males in my life. But I am glad to have my friends - male or female. Some of my male and female friends are even very young... even the thought of something sexual is so repugnant to me.

So I totally disagree that "eventually" there would be attraction. YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'll speak for only me.

Yes, and I have friends in all categories - best friends, close friends, good friends, just friends - made up of both guys and girls.

Absolutely. I worked with many men for years and they were friends and friends only. I was single and most were married. Then, I became good friends with their wives. So, I vote yes.

I have a few guy friends I talk to occasionally.
1. I haven't physically seen them in YEARS.
2. I tell my husband "Oh I was texting Clay yesterday and he said ....."
3. If one of them ever said "I'm coming into town, can you meet for lunch?" I would go only if my husband okay'd it, and I would prefer that my husband come and meet my old friends - guy or girl.

So yes, they can be friends, IMO. But best be a "long distance friendship."

Plus, I know my feelings towards these male friends of mine. I can think of a couple of them where I myself would restrict myself from meeting them for lunch b/c I could quite possibly have some feelings for them. Others, I can hug like a brother and feel totally comfortable. (Once, my ex boyfriend from highschool came into town. Hadn't seen him in 4 years. Him, me, my husband, and even my dad met at a local BBQ joint and chatted for a couple hours. I haven't talked to him since he left. That was probably 9 months ago. I texted him a "happy Birthday" last week and didn't get a reply.

Edit: Hmm. I guess I took your question as more of a "if you're married, do you have friends of opp sex". But heck, when I was single I had a LOT of guy friends. Probably more guy than girl. Many many were just plain ol friends - no sexual relationship. I grew up with two older brothers, so hanging out with the guys was the norm for me.

YES! I am freinds with heaps of men! I have never once had sexual intercourse with any of them except my husband. I play footy with them and everything.

I use to have some really great male friends, and I kept those relationships up for a few years after I got married, but life got in the way and we lost contact.

I think it is but I also think some people will always want more both men and women are like that. My husband has a really good friend who is a women they don't go out alone just to be respectfully of me and her soon to be husband and I have a male friend who is the same. But there are people who want more both of us have lost some good friends because they wanted more and we didn't.