Can Anyone Give Me Some Ideas on How to Get My Daughter to Go to Bed on Her Own?

Hi K.,

I have 2 year old twins that will be 3 next month and a 1 year old that will be 2 next month. I started putting them on a schedule when they we're around 4 months old, they all take a nap at 12 and go to bed at 7:30....all on their own. What I did was always put them to bed awake. It always helps to have a bed time schedule...for instance - dinner, maybe a half hour watching their favorite cartoon, bath, reading them a book and then bed time. Its always helped me to have a routine. Gives them time to wind down and they know bed time is coming. I know it may sound like torture, but when I first started my schedules and routines they cried, and I let them. I went in every 15 minutes to reasure them and also make myself feel better. I would not pick them up or hold them, as long as I knew they were not in pain, hungry or wet...I let them cry it out. I had to keep reminding myself crying is not dying. eventually they started to fall asleep on their own. I hope this helps.

well i have a three year old so i know how you feel. i got my daughter on a schedule i wash her up and then let her watch a movie until about 8:30 then i set the sleep alarm to automatically shut her t.v off and sometimes it works like a charm. but a night light is the key. try sitting in her room with the lights off and t.v off to give her that comfort of knowing your there.

Ok, I'm not a psychologist but I do have lots of good advice to spread around... First of all, I definitely agree with the Mom who stated about taking naptime away. That will energize her for a profound amount of time and may be what is keeping her up so late. Another thing you might try to do is ween her away from you. Does she still sleep in a crib or does she have a "Big Girl Bed" otherwise known to me and many other Moms as a toddler bed? If she still has a crib she might feel that she, in her mind and world, might still believe she is a baby, so to speak, but you and I know she's a very capable little adult now. If she doesn't already, I would suggest getting her a "Big Girl Bed." They have them now that have your child's favorite cartoon characters on them. My daughter has a Dora bed herself. Next... Make a BIG DEAL out of going to bed like a BIG GIRL!!! Sit with her, read to her, make her feel comfortable in her room by you staying there and showing her that she's not alone. She may be afraid of being in a room all by herself. Every night, for 1 week, move further and further away from her bed area. Bring in a chair or stool you can easily move away until you're almost actaully in your hall way area. Next thing you know she'll be very easy going about bedtime and it wont be so hard on you being up so late. I can only hope my advice helps and ask that you let me know how things have went for you. Good Luck!!!

i am a 25 year old mom of 2 little girls one is 3 years old and one is 5 mounths i never really had a problem with that but i know that my friends little girl had that problem and what i had told her to try was to ask her if she wanted to sleep with her fav baby or stuffed animal crack the door instead of closen it and if its open close it or crack it and she did that and she tryed it and it worked for her little girl she had to do it for a week or so to get her little girl to understand that she has to go to bed in her own bed

I used to have the same problem, I didnt know what to do, but my daughter is only one, yours is two. I decided to just put her in her crib, and walk out of the room. If I stayed in the room all she would do is cry, and or scream. So I just left, and let her go.It was hard, but now it is easy. My daughter still wakes up to eat, but she goes to bed with no prob...even nap time is a breeze.

Hi, my daughter just started sleeping in her own bed she is 2 1/2 shell be three in February. She sleeped with us for the longest time for almost 1 year or more. We got her a toddler bed and let her pick out her own comforter and sheet set at Toys R Us. It took a lot of patience but just in the last week she is now going to sleep on her own with out us in the room. We started out laying on the floor next to her bed letting her know we were in there with her once she fell asleep we left the room...she wakes periodically thru the night we just put her back in bed and tell her to go back to sleep...its hard to here her cry and say she wants to sleep in mommy and daddys bed...but the more patience we had and determination it seemed to work out good...now we dont even have to lay wiht her any more I let her pick a couple of things she wants to sleep with and cover her up give her a kiss and say goodnight...she usually wimpers a little but goes right to sleep now. One thing we did to get her used to her bed was let her lay in there and watch movies and also got her night light in case she had to get up and pee in the middle of hte night.

I would suggest getting the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth. I used it with my son and it was really helpful. He didn't go to bed so late, but he was regularly up by 5 am and did not nap unless I held him. He also needed rocked or nursed to sleep. Here are some sites witn info that might help:

http://parenting.ivillage.com/baby/bsleep/0,,7fp25djz,00....

http://members.tripod.com/sorensmom-ivil/sleeproblems.html

http://www.amazon.com/Healthy-Sleep-Habits-Happy-Child/dp...

http://redbook.ivillage.com/parenting/0,,t65m,00.html

Good luck!

S. H.

When I was married to my Ex husband, my stepdaughter would NOT sleep in her own bed. She was very into Barbie at the time. I got her a barbie pillow case and barbie comforter. I got pink sheets and a purple bed skirt. She went crazy for it and slept in it every night and even made the attempt to make her own bed every morning!!

K.,

we experienced sleep issues with my daughter when she was around that age. we finally did the "cry it out" thing and she was sleeping fine after just 2 nights. my daughter is turing 3 in october and sleeps from 9pm to 7am, and still takes a long nap 2pm-5pm in the afternoon.

I went through the same thing. My daughter would keep me up till about 1 or 2 in the morning. Is your daughter still taking naps? If so I would cut them out. Also does she sleep in late because she goes to bed late? If she does then wake her up early. Try and keep her active during the day so when bed time comes around she will tired. I would put together a bed time routine. About an hour before you want her in bed, start winding her down, give her a bath (try that Sothing bath stuff from Johnson and Johnson, I forget what its called but it in the purple bottle, It works great). Then do some relaxing activites like reading her a book, listening to soft lullabyes, stuff that will make her calm down from her long day. You might have to lay down with her for a while till she gets use to it. Also when it's bedtime make it clear it's bed time. Make her lay down and don't let her back up. I did that with my daughter it was an exhausting fight for a while. But eventually she got the hint that it was bedtime and she had to lay down. Does she go to sleep watching tv? I found that if we lay down and put in a movie (but not one that will wire her up), it helps because she will be laying down watching the movie and will start to feel tired. I hope this helps. Good Luck!

Hi Krisy! My daughter turned 18 months on September 18th! Anyway, we just put her up in her crib and let her cry herself to sleep. After doing that a few times, she now goes to sleep on her own after we put her in her crib. Don't know if this would work now that your daughter is two, but if you can stand the crying, I can't imagine it would hurt to give it a try. If she's in a bed now, then I don't know what to tell you. We haven't made that transition yet, but if I leave her in her room on her bed and close the door, she will not move from that spot if she's tired.

Hi K.,
I saw on Super Nanny, this same problem. There was a little boy who was just to attached to mommy and wouldn't leave her side. Bed, being one of the problems.
The Nanny had the mom put the kid in bed, and then sit in the middle of the room with her head down, not looking at the kid, or talking to him. As soon as the kid got out of bed, she picked him up, again not talking, and put him right back in. She did this until the kid went to sleep. It showed that over the course of a week, it took less and less time to get the kid to stay in his own bed.
The key points that were stressed, were to not make eye contact, and to not talk at all to the kid.
I hope that this helps.
D.