C-section and Active 3 Yr Old

Updated on June 03, 2010
K.N. asks from Westwood, MA
8 answers

have any of you moms just have a baby resulting in c-section and have an active 3 yr old at home. how did you manage rest and all other activities at home.

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A.T.

answers from Hartford on

Congrats. I had twins via c section with a new 3 year old boy at home. I had LOTS of stickers, books, etc to try to occupy him. Despite my best efforts, he watched a bit too much TV that first month. I'd let him watch a Little House on the Prairie DVD twice a day while I lay with him on the couch. My friends took him for play dates once or twice a week- that helped. We did a lot of take out the first month as well. Not really restful, but it did help keep sanity. It wil get easier quickly-its amazing how fast a mother's body can heal when it has no choice!

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

IMO - There are two kinds of recoevery from c-birth:
1.) The recovery from an unplanned one; one that happens after hours of exhausting but unproductive labor.
2.) The recovery from a scheduled c-birth; one that occurs before labor has a chance to tax you physically and emotionally.

Let me say, I have done it both ways and found the recovery time to be <2-4 days. And by that I mean, I was walking, carrying, lifting, laughing, nursing, doing housework, going shopping, etc. without pain in that time frame. I hear lots of people say that it is "major surgery" and that "recovering is so painbful and scary" but these statements were simply not my reality.

But seriously, the scheduled c-birth I had...My oldest was 4 and I was out of the hospital chasing him around just like any other post-partum mom within 2 days. The doctors and nurses said I was making all the other new moms feel bad. = ) And really, it was all due to the fact that I knew the c-birth was coming, I was well rested, hydrated, had my iron as high as I could get it, was able to get a good meal in before hand, got the house ready...And didn't get sliced open after having my uterus pummeled by contractions for hours and hours before hand.

PS - Ask for stiches instead of staples.

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B.

answers from Augusta on

I had my second by c section. My recovery from c section was MUCH easier than that from my vaginal delivery.
cleaning was left alone , hubby helped with that but I was up an walking the to the NICU every 2 hrs same night as my son was born getting moving early helped with recovery. They encourage you to get up and walk.
every thing from puzzles, cars, my little ponies, movies, etc all helped keep my daughter busy. Husband , and in laws took my daughter out when they were at the house. We had a park not far from our house.

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G.H.

answers from Burlington on

Hi Kelly,
Have you thought about hiring a high school student to come and help out in the afternoon? Or a postpartum doula?
Good luck in your recovery,
Genie

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M.C.

answers from Boston on

I have had two c sections and the recovery with the second one was much easier than the 1st. My oldest was 4.5 at the time. Like other moms have said I just explained to her what was going to happen and how she could help me out. She was great! We bought different things for her to do while I was resting with the baby, things that were special. She also got to watch a show in the bed with me sometimes.

Best of luck to you!

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

I had a c-section with my 2nd child. My eldest child was 3.5 years old at the time.
PRIOR to my having my 2nd child, I always talked with her about what would happen.... in child terms so she could understand. When I was in the last trimester of pregnancy for example, I would tell her I was tired and she and I would 'nap' together etc. She understood.
I explained to her that I would go to the hospital for 3 days and Daddy would take care of her, that she could visit me etc., and when I came home I had to rest and take it easy because i had a surgery. She understood.
My Husband and Mom, took off of work, and took turns staying home with me for the first 2 weeks post op. Then it was just me and my daughter and the new baby home. Alone.
I simply explained to my eldest, my daughter, that I had to take it easy... to heal. She understood. BUT.... a couple of weeks before I had my 2nd child, she had started preschool. Which she LOVED. So for 1/2 the day, it was just baby and me home. That gave me a 'break' so to speak. But.... in talking with my daughter and "explaining" things, it really helped. Because, the eldest child needs to be informed as well.... so that they are not just wondering all the time. I always, explained to my daughter as well, what a baby does... that is cries, that I have to nurse it, that he has to nap etc. But that is Mommy's "job" and that my daughter didn't have to 'worry' or feel 'responsible.' I also explained that she just be herself... that she is still important... but I cannot do the same things that I usually do, while I heal. So she understood and she was real great about everything.
I also had a 'routine' everyday, about things. So that is important for a child. For the eldest child.

I just did what I could, per my c-section and recovery. I did not push myself. And I always had a 'nap' time. Every day. So that helps.

The main thing, is to explain to your eldest child.... and to incorporate him/her into things... but keep it age-appropriate.
Do not suddenly 'expect' your eldest to just fall into place nor to act "older" than he/she is. Because, he/she is still only 3 years old.
And you have to spend one on one time with him/her too.

You just do what you can. 6 weeks post-op for a c-section recovery is normal. And you need to go to follow-up appointments too. If you need help, you ask someone, or your Hubby. That is his 'job' too. You just had major surgery. A c-section is major surgery.

Just do not strain yourself... or lift heavy things... and do what your doctor advises. Explain to your 3 year old, so that he/she can understand.

that is what I did. And my daughter, really impressed me. She understood, but I spent a TON of time talking with her about it and whenever needed, so that she and I still 'bonded' despite having a new baby around. You still have to give a lot of time to the eldest child. 3 years old is not an easy age, developmentally.

all the best,
Susan

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M.T.

answers from San Francisco on

I have had 3 csections, the most recent one I had when my daughter was two...and my baby was in the NICU for a while so back and forth there, trying to keep up with the 2 year old and my son played football 5 nights a week... IT WASNT easy! You just take it day by day and dont try to get everything done. Thank goodness I had my husbadn there to help. I did find that having a set schedule does make things better, and preparing meals ahead of time and making sure you get your rest, you are no good to anyone else if you dont have time for YOU!!!

Good Luck!

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D.W.

answers from Gainesville on

That's exactly where I was 2 years ago! I made a lot of meals up ahead and froze them to help with that aspect, had help for a few days with laundry and such, had lots of stuff on hand for the 3 year old to do like crayons, paints, puzzles, potato head, cars, things that were easy and would keep him happy and busy.

But i'll tell you, my second c-section was a breeze compared to the first. Of course I had to take it easy but everything was so much different-in a good way!

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