Hi! I am a mom of a 4 year old and 7 year old- both boys. My 4 year old has known all of his letters and letter sounds, colors, numbers, and some simple math since he was about 16 months old. He now is reading at about a 2nd grade level and is doing a little higher level than that in math. He is an extremely bright and wonderful child. I am concerned because in preschool he totally refuses to cooperate during music and gym time. He covers his ears, cries and basically refuses to participate. I am looking into a possible auditory problem but I don't see any other signs that would be the case. I am extremely worried about him starting kindergarten in the Fall. I am worried that he will not be challenged at all academically but more so have no idea how he will manage during music class, gym, on the bus, etc. Can anyone out there relate to this?? I have an ear appt scheduled for my son just to rule that out but I am really concerned that his refusal to participate will really start affecting him in preschool. Help!
Worried mom
Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to write responses to my question. I have scheduled a hearing eval for my son, although I am pretty positive that not much will come of that. He does very well at home and I am not seeing many of the behaviors that they are seeing at his preschool but I believe this is due to the routine that I have set at home. I believe that his home life is pretty dependable and he is not pushed out of his comfort zone too often- this isn't the case at school. As any mom would be, I am just extremely worried about my child and want to be sure that I do what is best for him. It breaks my heart to think that he may feel 'different' or not quite fit in with his peers. I guess our next step is to go through with the hearing eval to rule that out and then take it from there. Does anyone know what sensory testing involves? How can they tell if it is some sort of sensory issue? I've been looking up all that I can online but I feel that he doesn't quite fit the mold of anything that I have read. Again, thank you all so much. It means the world to know that I am not alone here.
What does he tell you when you ask him about it? Have you talked to his gym and music teachers and what do they think?
Central auditory processing disorder. These kids wil be sensitive to sound.
It typically has a root in adrenal malfunction. Look up "conns" syndrome, in which the adrenal hormone aldosterone is oversecreted by the gland. These kids will be highly sensitive to noise/sound.
This issue does not show up on an audial hearing test. Blood aldosterone levels will need to be checked.
Sounds like you may have a hypersensitive kid. Our little girl is on the opposite end--needs lots of sensory input to ground herself. Get the auditory evaluation and also think about getting a full evaluation, motor skills, psych, etc--hopefully you can schedule it through the preschool. That way, if services are needed you can get them with no problems in elementary school. On the bright side (!), our daughter is really bright as well. Her therapist has assured us that this will help her figure out what she needs to do to cope as she progresses through school and her workload and social life becomes more intense.
Its possible he could have a sensitivity to noise. Has this ever happened before? How long has this been going on? Does he ever do this at say, a concert or at an amusement park? Have you watched to see what is going on? What does he say? He must be very articulate and can tell you what is going on? If this has been happening for weeks and it has become very distressing for him then yes, see someone about it. But if this is isolated and has happened only a couple times you have to remember every kid has his or her quirks and it wont destroy their lives. I think you are caught off guard because your son definetly sounds gifted! I would speak to his teacher and sit in on the class if you have not already.
can you create a simmilar atmosphere at home and then talk to him about what he feels and how it effects him? I suggest you start there and talk to the school district about possibly testing him for special education needs there ... that is a service they offer. Good Luck my son does have sensory processing disorder and there are many fun things that come with and many difficult things as well but you can learn to love it when you KNOW what to do and how to help. If it turns out there are some sensory issues a book that helped me understand was "The Out of Sync Child" this was a blessing. Good website too!
http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/
Does he ever like listening to Music ? any kind of music? Is the teacher asking him to do something he doesnt feel he can do? how are his motor skills? does he feel he cannot succeed in gym? since all preschool academics are so easy for him he may be reluctant to try things that don't come easily to him. do you think that is the problem?
If he is socially the same as his peers he should be ok for most of Kindergarten but if he (like some very bright children) does not like to socialize with other kids that could be a problem.
My daughter knew all that by age 4 also. She was reading books and LOVING it. All before she even started K4. I taught her myself. Your son might get a little bored with the material there, except that they probably incorporate a LOT of coloring and art work type things. Those are the things that kept my daughter enjoying school. They also typically incorporate a lot of music (singing songs, etc) and my daughter loves music. My child had None of the auditory sensitivities you describe with your son. Have you had him evaluated regarding this? Talked to his doctor and asked for recommendations or referrals?
My daughter did well, even though I'm sure there were times she was not challenged anywhere close to what she could have been... but she learned a lot socially and started to learn to be a little more assertive (she is very quiet and reserved around new people and wouldn't really speak up for herself back then). Now, (she is in 4th grade) she is in the gifted/talented program and thriving with that and all the extracurriculars she is involved in (Helen Ruffin Reading Bowl Team, the school's morning news crew, 3rd year of piano lessons, Tang Soo Do, etc). Her first few years were spent in private school, and she had a weekly music class, computer class, art class and foreign language class that they rotated through each week. Your son can do just fine in his age appropriate grade if you keep him involved in more challenging activities outside of school, and get him evaluated for gifted as early as possible. But you need to figure out the sensory/auditory issues so that you know how to help him adjust to the "outside" world. It may end up that the best thing for your son, at least for a few years, could be home schooling, so that you are in control of his environment.
YES and I'm still waiting to find a qualified OT to evaluate my son for sensory issues. I have two names I need to call back because they had no availability to months ago. We had his hearing tested, but it's not a problem. However, we have to take noise cancellation headphones to places because he often freaks out over noise. He's also extremely bright, but he doesn't seem to be able to "handle" very much in the way of stimulation. It can be difficult to find a qualified person to evaluate your child for sensory issues -hence our long waiting list.
Also -at a level your son seems to be, you should have him tested for exceptionality/gifted. Gifted students are usually served through the special education department of schools and at his age, you could have him tested through your local public elementary school. If he is gifted or of exceptional intelligence, you're going to really have to be his advocate. He may need to go to a private preschool or a montessori school where he can work at his own pace.
Has he been tested for asburgers?
Sensory Processing Disorder Checklist: Signs And Symptoms Of Dysfunction
I am trying to find the site but this is the title of the list on the site, so that might get you there.
Very good list so you can work on it yourself.
Let your boy be a little boy! He will go at his speed and not anyone else's. When HE is ready, he will be ready. Just beacuse he reads doesn't mean he is bodily ready for whatever preschool is terming 'gym'.
Play will be his best course of action - Kindergartens are being looked at for including more 'play' in their structure.
Ear appointment may yield something too; he may be sensitive to loud noises more than other children. Every child is different!
It really does sound like he has sensitivities to different things though, sound being one of them. Noise and activity others. Possibly integration issues, and coordination. Reading is not coordinated. It is a solitary activity. He may be an introvert at this point, and pushing him may just push him further into that. It really is early to expect a lot from him.
For further reading, look up the works of Rudolph Steiner.
Good luck!
M.
This type of reaction is not uncommon in gifted children. Psychologist Kazimierz Dabrowski identified five of these intensities, which he called "overexcitabilities" or "supersensitivities": Psychomotor, Sensual, Emotional, Intellectual, and Imaginational. Gifted children tend to have more than one of these intensities, although one is usually dominant.
The sensual overexcitability is one of Dabrowski's supersensitivities common in gifted children. It is recognized by heightened response to the five senses.These children might avoid loud sounds, for example, putting their hands over their ears in the movie theater. They may also refuse to eat certain foods because of the texture, or they may love other foods for the same reason. In addition, they can be incredibly sensitive to minute differences in the chemical composition of foods, being able to tell the difference in even small changes in a recipe.
For more information on this and other support for gifted kids visit:
http://www.sengifted.org/articles_social/Lind_Overexcitab...
My friend... has a son like that.
VERY bright.... academically and advanced by at least 2 grade levels.
Not socially or emotionally..... he is 'immature' that way... not anything detrimentally wrong with him, it is just his maturity.
She... started her son in Kindergarten, when he would be turning 5. He is late born. She started him in Kindergarten at that age, because, he is academically bright/advanced... instead of waiting until he was turning 6 years old.... per his 'maturity' emotionally/socially etc.
Her son, is now in 2nd Grade. She just recently told me, she WISHED... that she did NOT put him in Kindergarten... so early. That she waited until he was turning 6. BECAUSE... now at his Grade Level and age.... (being on the young side in his class make-up).... he is, still... immature. The other kids... are decent to him... but treat him more like a "Pet" (as his Mom says). And I have seen that as well. The Teacher's generally love him... because he is so bright... and an endearing child. They are kind to him... but in a "class pet" sort of way... if you know what I mean. But he has friends.
Her son... has VERY high functioning.... Aspergers..... and he has an Aide, in class with him.
Having brains and being academically smart... is not always the thing to go by.
Another friend, has a bright advanced child. She even skipped a grade when she was younger. So thus, she is the youngest in her class. She is now in Middle School. And... per her parents.... she is shunned from the older girls and she is NOT going through... the same issues/phases/age related tendencies... as her classmates. Because, she is younger. At in Middle School... the age disparities.... becomes... more.... obvious... then affects them socially and emotionally.
So... YOU can provide extra learning for your child at home.... or in other manners.
Academic advancement... is not.... always the thing to go by, in child development overall.
AND if your son has Auditory issues or sensory issues... then yes, find out. So that, your son can BEST be assisted.... beneficially and in a positive manner.
It would be best... to get him assessed.
Perhaps.
all the best,
Susan
