Hi moms,
My daughter is approx 2 years old. She was exclusively breastfed. As she has got older, she has weaned herself down to only BFing right before nap or bed time. Normally she will BF for about 15-20 mins (to relax and unwind) and then goes into her crib and goes to sleep. That was the only time she BFed. The last 2 weeks she has regressed to wanting the boob all day long. As soon as she gets up she starts asking for the boob. All day long its "boob boob boob". She wants to nurse all day! And now, before nap or bed she wants to nurse for an hour, not just 15-20 minutes. I don't know why she has regressed like this. She is getting her next set of teeth in, so maybe thats why? Or maybe a growth spurt? Has anyone else delt with this? I put my foot down today and told her NO BOOB, and she was a bear all day! I guess I am just trying to figure out WHY she is doing this. Any thoughts from anyone who has gone through this? Thanks!
Thanks moms! I was relieved to hear that other 2 year olds do this too. Nothing else has changed in our lives, so it must be the teething and she is definately going through a growth spurt. I was just confused because she never acted this way before, not even other times she was teething. The mom who said that at this age they are struggling to be a big girl and still be a baby hit the nail on the head! I like the idea of singing a song to time her at the breast so that is what I have been doing and it has helped. Thanks again mamas!
Sounds like it might be getting close to time to ween fully? I would just tell her no and offer her a glass of milk.
Totally feel for you. My 2 year old is obsessed with nursing right now! My 4 year old went through it too and it passes. Maybe she's coming down with something or feeling insecure or whatever. When I'm at the end of my rope with nursing for the day, I time him on my stopwatch or sing ABC's or whatever to limit the time at the breast. Just know that it will pass and she won't go to the prom still nursing :)
She's obviously feeling clingy for some reason. Has anything happened or changed in her life? Has she been feeling okay? Are you trying to potty train and it's stressing her out and causing to want to nurse more?
Unless you're wanting to wean entirely I would let it be. At 2 you're okay to distract her for a bit or make her wait a few minutes and offer alternatives, but refusing her outright might actually make the problem worse and not better.
Two year old children do go back and forth between wanting to grow up and wanting to be a baby. It's possible she's just in the "baby phase" right now and she'll just work herself out of it again soon.
Hope that helps.
no answers here as I'm not to that point, but kudos to you for sticking it out.
maybe she just needs to have the boundary set--she's a big girl, she can have it at xx time and that's it.
dd is 9mos and going through a growth spurt apparently as we've gone from nursing 5 times a day for 10-15minutes, to 6 times a day and both sides again...who knows.
Ugh, my 2 1/2 year old still nurses and he goes back and forth occasionally. I definitely remember that his 2 year molars did it for him and he always does it when he's not feeling well. I started setting limits when it was making me a bit nuts, like singing the alphabet song or counting to 60 and then telling him we were all finished. I try to limit it to sleepy times, but there are times I let him nurse more, ie during illness.
I don't know why your daughter wants to nurse more. Has anything changed in your/her life that makes her want to be closer to you.
Also, she's learning about making demands and getting them too, so there's that "power" for kids.
Could be a million things.. Just remember, it has to be a mutually beneficial relationship, so set your boundaries and stick to it, but maybe you could offer her a bit more for a short time just to keep her from being a bear.
Good luck!
I just wanted to say how glad I was to see so many great responses. I nursed my oldest for 14 months, my middle child for 2 1/2 years, and am still nursing my youngest at 2 1/2 years old. My older two children both weaned when I was 6 months pregnant with the next baby, so this is going to be my first time weaning when not pregnant.
My youngest generally nurses twice a day (nap/bedtime), but he does have days where he wants to nurse more often. We're usually so busy with my older two that it's hard to just sit and let him nurse, but I do it when I can. I've noticed that with him, it's often a way to try to get my undivided attention. With two siblings, he doesn't get that as often as he'd like.
I guess my point is that it's normal. You can continue to set firm limits of only nursing at nap/bedtime, you can set less strict limits, or you can go ahead and let her nurse as much as she wants. My guess is that it will pass within a few days, and she'll be back to the old routine. I've also found that when the demands to nurse get to be too much, we'll try to stay very busy outside (or at least out of the house), and he won't think to ask to nurse.
Glad to hear that you're feeling better about the situation!
I'm confused as to why Jen thinks this means it's time to wean...I'd say the opposite, she's obviously NOT ready! lol
I think you have your answer:) It's probably a combination of teeth and growth. Has anything else changed in her life? That could also lead to breastfeeding clingy-ness. Like Daddy away on business, or you're pregnant?
I'm guessing it will pass, but you could let her nurse for a specific amount of time. Tell her you'll sing _____ and then she'll be done when you're done with the song.
Get some teething tablets or strips and see if that helps her some.
Good Luck! :)
OH...and Good for you for nursing so long! That's really an accomplishment.
My daughter has been doing some of what I think is very natural regression, as she gets more independent, she needs to return to the comforts, to make sure she's still got her magnetic north, as it were (which is how I've always thought of the breast...) So if I were you, I would allow some extra time and space for her to nurse, unless you really are done with that. However it goes, good luck! She probably just needs some extra reassurance from you, cuddling, babying.
I feel your pain. Mine is going through a HUGE fear stage and has bad seasonal allergies, so I have a double whammy (or more). He wants it all the time!!! I don't have anything to add except a thank you for posting your question. The responses have helped me. And it is reassuring to know that I'm not alone in this regression and extended bfing.
What does your pediatrician say about this? I would think that she is old enough to understand "no" and you need to stand your ground. Offer her a cup of milk or her favorite teddy bear or blanket if its for comfort. You can deal with her being a "bear" and she will get over it. I nursed all four of my children ( but not as long as you) and there were no ill side effects from refusing to nurse them during the weaning process. Of course, weaning a 2 year old might be a little different. I would talk to your pediatrician or contact a lactation specialist who may have some ideas.
My thought is that maybe she is doing it for security reasons. Is there anything going on that would make her more clingy right now? Any kind of change in schedule or circumstances?
If so, that could be it. It is probably just be a passing stage. When my son hit that typical separation anxiety stage around 15 mos or so, he wanted to nurse a lot more. We had been weaning, but because I couldn't get him to drink dairy, I was still nursing a couple of times a day. All of a sudden he wanted it all the time. It only lasted a couple of weeks, and then we went down to once a day for other reasons, but he was fine with it.
My son is 2 1/2 now and still nurses occasionally. He hasn't done it in a couple of weeks, so maybe he is done, but he's done that before. I think he is done and then he is adamant about nursing all of a sudden. When he does this, it is only once and then he is done again for a while. But it seems like sometimes he just remembers about it and wants to hold onto that source of comfort. Other times I can tell he is having a needy day. Teething and growth spurts can definitely be a reason to need a little extra comfort, at least with mine they were.
If it is too much or an inappropriate time, I just try to be firm and explain that it is not ok right now and why, then distract. Sometimes it is with playing, sometimes he needs some snuggles. Since yours is wanting it all day, I would try the comfort/snuggle thing first. Maybe read a book with her on your lap instead. Good luck!
It certainly could be a growth spurt or comfort. Those bigger teeth are very uncomfortable for some babies. And breastfeeding has been a big source of comfort to her.
But I think you need to make a decision-are you going to continue extended nursing or do you want her to wean? With extended nursing you have to expect her to go thru periods where she will want to nurse more often just as she did when she was much younger. Not to say that you can't put simple limits on her like you aren't going to nurse for an hour before bed and such. But to cut her off because you were frustrated with the change was probably very confusing for her. I'd be a bear too! lol
My son is 22 months and still is a big-time boobman! My suggestion is don't make a big deal about her desire to nurse and the desire will fade when she is ready. If you make a big deal about it, she will want it even more.
My daughter nursed till she naturally weaned at 3.5 years old.
:)
Suggestion: She only want the closeness, love, and security she gets from nursing. It helps her to relax, and unwine. To help her sleep. She is not readly to cut off completely. Also she needs to have that to suck on to the pain of cutting teeth. Did you try to offer her a teething ring from the refrig or freezer.
