Breastfeeding Failures and Successes

Tara,
When i had my son,(who is 13 months)I was so nervous and scared. I had now first hadn experience. I feel that if i had taken a breastfeeding class befoe i gave birth it would have helped.
I really wanted to beable to breastfeed for at least the first three months and then pump and still continue to provide him with the milk. I onle tried for the first two days of his life. I was frustrated and he didnt seem to interested in it. I feel if i had a class and maybe some friends to lean on for support it would have been a big help.

I tried to breastfeed both of my daughters but I just couldn't make it work. My breast milk often didn't come in until I was home from the hospital. I felt like I was starving my baby and everyone at the hospital told me if I was going to breastfeed then I couldn't give them formula. I was a crying mess with hormones, my babies were crying because they were hungry and I wasn't getting any help or support from my husband. It was just aweful and I just wanted to bond with my babies and not feel so pressured. I was tired from labor and delivery and the lactation specialist was trying to help me but I just felt like it was one more person pressuring me. I was just an emotional mess because I wanted to do the best for my babies. But they were hungry and my colostrum didn't seem to be enough for them. I made it five days breastfeeding my first baby and only one day breastfeeding my second daughter. That and my nipples got sore and bled. And I blocked up a duct and had painful swelling in my armpit with my first baby because nobody told me about rotating the baby to get the milk from all the ducts. I was just a mess.

I am a mother of a beautifully breastfed 5month old little girl, but it wasn't always that way. After she was born we brought her to my chest and with in minutes we were trying to fed her, she had another plan. Throughout my stay at the hospital, my midwife, the nurses, a lacatation consultant, and WIC counselers tried to get the baby to latch on successfully but everyone was unsuccessful. My dream of nursing my little baby was suddenly being shattered before my eyes and there was nothing i could do about it. Annabelle was just stubborn she didn't want to work to get my colostrum or open her mouth wide enough latch on. We tried EVERYTHING, sugar water, supplimental nursers, nipple shields, everything! She was 10lbs 2 oz when she was born and when we went to her 1st pediatrician appt she was only 9lbs! So I continued to fight! Feeding her from one breast, pumping the other and feeding that to her in a bottle, until my nipples were so raw that i cried during every feeding, and after. I then developed a mastitis. I was devestated! I kept thinking what the hell am i going to do! I talked with my WIC counseler throughout this whole process, not to much as what to do... becasue i was getting overwhelmed with advice, but she was just there for me to cry to. Well i eventually stopped nursing altogether and just pumped for about 3weeks straight. One afternoon as i was cleaning the equipment to start my nursing session, I was so fricken tired i just wanted to give up and give her formula, but i said hey lets give this one more chance, and i'm glad i did because now she's nursing wonderfully!

Hi Tara~ I am a breastfeeding failure. My daughter was 5 weeks premature and didn't have a good suck response and couldn't latch on. I went to breastfeeding classes prior to her birth and worked with the lactation consultant while we were in the hospital. I pumped for two months after she was born and gave it to her with a bottle. I finally got a mastitis (sp?) and called it quits. I didn't get a lot of pressure, in fact my pediatrician told me if you look at a football team, you can't tell who was breastfed and who wasn't. lol
I didn't attempt breastfeeing with my son, I wanted to make it as easy as I could for both of us.
I guess good advice for expecting moms would be to tell them that not everything goes as planned and if it doesn't, it is ok.

My daughter is 13 months and I am still nursing her! It was pretty easy for me, she latched right one. I had one problem in the beginning where I was letting her go too long without eating (5 hours as opposed to 3) so I had to start waking her up to feed her, and I also figure dout I had to pump my breast a little so that it was "wet" and then she would eat for longer. I still have one problem and that is she prefers the right breast over the left, so now I am lopsided since the right still produces more milk. She has latched on to the left from time to time, my nipple is inverted on that side so I think thats why she woouldn't feed regularly on it. Other than that, I found breastfeeding wonderful and it was nice not having to mix formula or worry about bottles when traveling. I am starting weaning but it is child-led weaning since she does need it for comfort. She eats alot of solid food.

we were able to get max to nurse untill he was 11 months old and then began to wean him to cows milk.

THE MOST ANNOYING THING was all the people who glare and make comments when you are nursing in public-which i didnt do untill max and i had the hang of things. it is very hard to nurse a baby in public to begin with let alone the people who feel the need to try and see the baby then give you a hard time once they figure out that your breast is exposed-even if its under a blanket.

thats my annoyance with nursing and it has nothing to do with me or my son but with people who are annoying.

K.

I'll weigh in on the failures. I bf'd my son for 5 weeks. First it was the soreness and cracked nipples. When we went to Syracuse and the nurse showed me that it shouldn't hurt I was like wow! Plus once my milk came in I think the moisture healed them up too. Then my ds was in the Nicu at Crouse for a few days and they told me to pump like crazy. So I used the pumps there and got up every 2 hours like they told me. I was getting 2oz from each side every 2 hours when ds was less than a week old! When we got home it got worse. I would be engorged and then he couldn't latch on etc. I went to the lactation consultants at SMC and they were clueless. My midwife summed it up "I only know about not enough" I tried pumping some of it off but that was only encouraging my body to make more so I stopped that. After 5 weeks of frustration and two bouts of mastitis I finally said enough is enough I am not enjoying my time with my baby. But not before being admitted to the psych ward from all the stress. To this day I still have milk if dh squeezes a nipple and DS is 17mos!

Well, I have two stories with two boys. Oddly enough it wasn't a missed period or nauses feelings that led to me know I was pregnant, it was the fact I was milking. I went to the doctor after I discovered the milk in the shower one night and sure enough I was 5 weeks pregnant. Go figure, milking at 5 weeks. From there my body was all a mess... soaking shirts and gettings milk spots so early, just a few month pregnant. Sadly by the time my oldest was born, I had been milking so long within a week after he came, the milk went. The doctor couldn't explain why it came so early or left even after he was pregnant. Frightenly, We did not know that my milk was not coming in the day I came home from the hospital. For three days we delt with a screaming baby and constantly wanting to feed. At first we believed he was just a hungry baby, but after calling the hospital we found out that after they would bring him in to see me, they were giving him a bottle afterwards as well and not telling us. For the first three days of being home my son was not getting enough to eat becuase we did not know I wasn't producing. Another call to the doctor and a 4 oz bottle later it was finalized. Within 4-5 days of him being born, my leaking like waterfall breasts had gone dry. It was hard because I wanted to breastfeed like everyone states is so great for bonding, but it wasn't happening.

As for when I had my second, that was doomed right nfrom the start as well. I did not milk while I was pregnant as I did the first, but I tried constantly after he was born. It too again was no use. The first week it was there if I squeezed and squeezed, but for him to actually eat on his own or even for me to try pumping was not helping.

Needless to say I was doomed from the start to give my boys the ultimate nutrition. I see moms breastfeeding their kids till their one, two, or even three years old, and I couldn't even go a week.

I had problems nursing my son as well. I had absolutely no problems producing milk, and in fact I had been lactating for about a month and a half prior to his birth and pumping/freezing the milk.

The problems came into play after his birth, when we couldn't maintain a decent latch for more than a second or two. We discovered that he had a tight frenulum (tongue-tie) pretty quickly with the help of the LC at the hospital, but the doctor that the pediatrician referred us to refused to snip the tongue-tie on such a young baby. He insisted that he would have no problem with speech etc. later on in life and told me that I should just use a bottle if I couldn't get him to latch.

Thankfully the pumping wasn't difficult for me. In ten minutes or so I was able to pump about 12 ounces from each breast. I continued to pump and bottlefeed until I had to return to work. At that point it became too hard to pump while at work. We had more than enough milk frozen to last another month or so, and then we ended up having to put him onto a soy-based formula to combat reflux.

Tara - I totally agree with every other mother that the biggest problem is other people. Make sure the women you work with understand that it is a personal choice. I love nursing my daughter, but hate having to defend it. I also hear that women who decide not to get lectured for that choice. You just can't win. I have talked to many women before and after having my daughter and the one common link is that is different for everyone. You have to make the choice that works for you and your child. I like to say that an unhappy mommy makes an unhappy baby. I am very lucky to have a boss how is very supportive. Make sure that women know their rights. NY state just inacted a law regarding breastfeeding and I just heard something about a MA ruling regarding a breastfeeding mother who wanted more time on her bar exam to nurse and was granted that time. I see that you are pro-breast feeding so try to make sure that you encourage and not judge. It is hard for me too since I love nursing so much and can't understand why any one wouldn't do it. I just have to remember that it is so personal and formula fed babies are just as loved. Good luck with the new position.

I think the biggest challenge to mothers in general is the pressure to breastfeed.

Before I even had my son I knew I was going to breastfeed and began on our first days in the hospital. I have a seizure disorder and my neurologist knew I was pregnant and my OB knew the medicines I took. However, neither one mentioned that I should reconsider breastfeeding. The only person to mention it was the pediatrician which started a string of phone calls to other doctors.

Being told that I shouldn't breastfeed because any side effects were unknown was devastating. However I was equally worried about the stigma that would be applied to me for being a bottle feeding mom. Women choose to breastfeed or bottle feed for personal and medical reasons. Having my whole world turned upside down made me realize even more that it doesn't matter whether we breast or bottle feed, but what truly matters is that we love our children and do what is in their best interest.

I am 26 years old and my son will be four-months old on July 30th. I knew when we were trying to conceive that I wanted to breastfeed and I also knew that not everyone would agree with my decision. All of my friends kids were bottle babies and my mother did not approve of nursing. I knew that breastmilk was best for my son however and I was determined to try nursing.

I hemorraged a little after delivery so I was unable to nurse right in the delivery room (something I want to do next time if possible). I told the nurses I did not want my son to be given any bottles of formula or sugar water, but he could have a soothie (pacifier) if they felt he needed it. Unfortunately this request led the nurses in the nursery to think that he was fed in the delivery room and I was not able to feed my son until he was 8-hours old when they FINALLY brought him in to me.

My son would not latch at all when I tried to feed him and I was very concerned we would not be able to nurse. Luckily the nurses at the hospital were very supportive. After seeing that the latching was not going to happen, they showed me how to use a nipple shield. For those who don't know what that is, it is a thin plastic bottle nipple shaped shield that you put over your own nipple. The baby can latch better onto it while still getting the feel of the breast in his mouth. After that we did alright.

It took a while for my milk to come in and my son lost over a pound in his first week. We were scheduled to see his lactation consultant at his pediatrician every other day until he gained, which he did after a week and with gusto.

Our son needed the nipple shield until he was about 2 1/2 months old. I was worried he would need it the whole time, but every day I would offer him the breast without it and one day he just latched normally.

He is now about 17 pounds (he was 8 pounds 3 ounces at birth) and thriving!

I have 6 kids and I breastfed each one of them. My first three children that I had back in the 1980's when I was very young it was a little bit harder I think. First being young although it felt natural, it was the people around me that made me feel uncomfortable. I did breast feed for about 8 months with each child though. I didn't go out much though! Financially it only made sense also. I did get WIC then which was a god send. It is a very good program. But I don't ever remember having a person that talked to me about breastfeeding though. When I had my next 3 children, which are triplets, I was in my late 30's. I also breastfed them for as long as I could. I work fulltime so having a work place that makes it easy for you to pump is a must. Thankfully I had that. I could only breastfeed for about 4 months though because my boys all had reflux so bad that my house was a puking wonder. So what worked was a bottle with rice cereal and they had to sit up in their seats to eat and not be touched for about a half an hour after eating . Not that I liked doing this but it was the only way for them to hold their food. Again WIC helped me alot with formula after I stopped pumping, because I went through a lot of it. I think everyone should try breastfeeding but it isn't for everyone. My daughter had a child 2 years ago and as hard as she tried she just got to sore and impatient which doesn't help at all. She was more comfortable with the bottle and I think her child was to , they can sense it if their moms aren't comfortable I think. Not sure if any of this helped but for you Tara good for you and help those moms out their to breastfeed and feel comfortable with it.

I am the mother of one, my daughter Natalie, age 11 months. Because I am only 23, many people were surprised when I decided to nurse my daughter, but in my experience, many younger mothers have begun to nurse their babies. And while I had a relatively easy time with it and did it for nine months, I wish that women were able to make their own decisions concerning breastfeeding. In my case, I was told almost daily by a "concerned co-worker" that breastfeeding was the most healthy and natural thing for my baby, which was true, but it still had nothing what so ever to do with him and only proved to make me feel as if I had to breastfeed or I was a horrible mother. When I finally made the choice to breastfeed, he then took credit for my decision. If their was one thing I could tell those who believe they are just giving moms or moms-to-be advice, it would be that my breasts are my property. Anything I choose or don't choose to do with them is my business.

Also, I wish their was more support for mom's after they deliver. Many new mothers don't decide to breastfeed until their child or children are born. That is when a caring nurse, midwife, doctor or lactation consultant is crucial. In the same respect, they need to let moms know that IT IS NOT EASY, and contrary to popular belief, IT DOESN'T JUST COME NATURALLY.
This is such a misconception among those who have never done it first hand. I have helped many of my friends and family who needed help in the first few weeks of their childrens lives with breastfeeding because they were lead to believe that it was thier fault that they had problems. This was so far from the truth and it really made me mad. If I hadn't seen my lactation consultant a few days after my daughter was born, I more than likely would have given up. But with her help, I nursed my daughter for well over six months. My philosophy on breastfeeding is if you want to do it, God bless you. If you don't want to, God bless you all the same. Don't let others force you to do something that you don't want to do.

I have nursed all my children for different lengths-the shortest 7 months, the longest 4.5 years. We do not do bottles and we do ecological b'feeding to space the children and do not give solids until 12 months old.

As far as breastfeeding goes, I have a very difficult time pp. I come down with mastitis every time sometimes repeatedly, more so with each pregnancy. As a matter of fact, I seem to make a lot of milk. I hope this is not TMI, but my dd is 7 months old and I still fill up and get engourged and leak a great deal. I am considering getting some sage tea, but am a bit concerned since this is the only source of nutrition for my baby, I do not want to diminish my supply too much.

I wish someone had told me the possibility of really delayed onset of milk production. I had a long, induced labor that ended in a c-section. I didn't have milk until my son was 8 days old. He had a great latch from almost the beginning and we didn't even really know how little he was getting because he really didn't fuss about it at all. As it is, I never have been able to produce enough to satisfy him, even after frequent pumping after nursing, taking fenugreek and brewer's yeast, drinking till I feel I'm going to burst, etc. We went through a really rough 3 weeks, and while I am still totally committed to bf'ing, I felt a lot of pressure from people who just said "nurse, nurse, nurse, and your body will make enough". Well, I nursed until I thought I'd go crazy, but when you have a baby that's crying after you've given him everything you have, there's no way you can just walk away and say "too bad, that's all you get". My body never has, and probably never will make enough (he's 2 months old now). He nurses and takes a bottle at every feeding. It's not what I planned, and yes, I do sometimes feel like I might be judged when people see me giving him a bottle. Thankfully, I had a lot of encouragement and support from family and friends, or I might have given up trying at all.

I had trouble bf'ing my daughter too, and I wish I had been better prepared for the emotional havoc that resulted. My lactation consultant (whom I saw every day for the first week of my daughter's life) assured me that her latch was fine and that all my "equipment" was working properly, but she was having so much trouble that I felt like I was doing something wrong, and that I was letting her down (ha, no pun intended) by getting SO frusterated. By the end of every feeding I'd be crying from the pain and stress, and the sweat would just be pouring off of me...in the middle of December, no less. She and I eventually worked it out, and she is happy and healthy now.

I just think moms intending to breastfeed should know that the first couple of weeks (or even months) are a learning process for BOTH mom and baby, and that it's so important for new moms not to be too hard on themselves.

I have 3 children and nursed each for a short time. I had some difficulties in the hospital w/ my first but then things worked out. I did feel a little pressure to continue when I thought I should just bottlefeed (I wanted to breastfeed but I never felt I had to or it was wrong for me not to) I'm glad I continued. I thought I would try to do it for a year but at least 6mths. My daughter was born at the end of June & then I got a teaching job for the fall. I tried to pump at work but it was too difficult & b/c I wasn't nursing as often my supply diminished. I ended up nursing my first 2 children for about 4 mths (maybe a little longer w/ what I had frozen) but my last child only about 2 months. (My pregnancies have been timed to coincide with summer breaks.) I never really loved nursing -but I thought it was for the best. With my last child I did it more out of guilt b/c I had w/ the other 2. My husband was supportive but I didn't have any family or friends that breastfed. (before having kids I new some members of my husbands family thought it was "gross") During the time that I Breastfed all my kids I probably only nursed in front of someone (besides my husband) 3 or 4 times. I usually went off by myself (which is no fun at a party of when you have guests) the 3rd time I started to pump in the bathroom and then let someone bottle feed.
One thing I did do that I think helped me continue nursing -was to use a nipple shield. I started at the hospital w/ my first & was told to just use it to get started -but when I tried to not use it hurt too much & my nipples started to crack (& this was just a few times) I went back to the shield & you used it everytime. With my second child I had my husband sneak one in b/c when I told the nurses that I used it before they discouraged it. Using the shield it never hurt, my nipples didn't crack or bleed (like I hear can happen) & when they were first born its reassuring to see that something is coming out b/c of what is left on the shield. I also never had problems switching back & forth to a bottle when it was necessary - or using a pacifer.

My biggest challenge were my inlaws. They don't believe in nursing and feel it takes upp to much time. They feel that because breast milk digests more efficiently that you end up feeding too often and for too long and can't get anything done. They also felt it wasn't fair to my husband, because it took away from his bonding. Oh well I did it any way in spite of their objections

Well I tried to breastfeed my now 2 year old daughter, it was my desire to breastfeed for at the least a few days, the most a year. Well when she latched on, she latched on! After the first session I was left with two brused, bleeding and purple nipples. My daughter had given each of my nipples "hickeys" and the second try to feed resulted in me sobbing from the pain (I had her with NO pain meds and did not cry, just FYI) we tried ice, cream, pumping and it would only make the brused skin blister. I was so upset, but she was put on formula and turned out just fine. I admire the mothers who breastfeed and wish everyone would try atleast once, if they dont like it then they dont have too do it. But atleast try.