Breast Feeding Newborn, When Does It Get Easier?

Sounds like you being used as a human pacifier! Let her go for about 20 minutes, then pop a paci in her mouth. If she is still hungry, she will let you know. If she just needs sucking, she'll be content. :)
Hope this helps!

Oh boy was this a task for me. I am a very private person and didn't want to feed in front of any one other than direct family and neither did she. She would stop eating if there was noise. I would peak in at her and she would be peaking around with the eyes wide open.

Then I was also embarrassed by the suckling/snorting noises they can make.

In the beginning, I would only sit in the rocker and feed her to comfort her. I wouldn't move. But after awhile, I got used to it.

I made it to my 1 year goal. I went back to work after 6 months and had to pump at work, so yes I supplemented.

All the while, my MIL screaming can't you give that baby a bottle or it is such an antiquated way to feed the baby.

Hang in there.

With my first, I was always told "it's natural", "it gets easier", and "you'll be able to figure it out". Well, like you, it wasn't so easy for me either and I really disliked being told how things should have gone would they have played out perfectly. I supplemented, and felt like a failure in the process.

Before my second son was born, a lactation nurse told me "Just like your first, it probably won't be easy. But, give it 3 months and it will get easier and be what it should be." She also said 3 months was longer than she knew it would take but that if I set that as my own personal goal then I would be less likely to give up. The main thing was if it was important for me to breastfeed then I'd have to fight through the pain, endure the constant, long feedings and, yes, manage a toddler while I'm at it.

Best breastfeeding advice I could have gotten.

Everything you say in your post, totally normal. It's probably true that ideally feedings shouldn't be that long ... but, sometimes and for some babies all the time (at first) they are! And, that's the truth too.

So, with my advice (and the three month mark in mind) I would exactly describe my second go at breastfeeding as a "fight". I fought through the pain. I battled through days where I was a zombie. Then one day, I noticed it was like something clicked. My body had healed, my son figured out his end of things. It was at exactly the 6-week mark.

If it helps, I extend the advice I received so many years ago to you. Choose your end time ... 2 months, 3 months? Decide how important it is for you to breastfeed. If it's truly imporant for you to succeed, then fight for it. If you give your 100% and it's still not working by your set goal, then there's nothing wrong with giving up.

Good luck!

I fail with my first two and it starting getting easier at about 4-5 weeks for me and now at 3.5 months she is hardly on for more then 15 minutes every 2-3 hours. I have two others to chase after a 5 yr old girl and 3 yr old boy and I tell you what I always thought "what do you mean breastfeeding is easier, I'd rather just make a bottle" but I never made it past 4 weeks before and I tell you what. I love just being able to pop her on the boob and be done! Hang in there Keep up the determination and soon enough you will succeed and have a great time with it.

hi, i know how you feeling, what i did was pump milk and my baby drink from bottle, pump every 4 hrs and she drink it from bottle in 10 min. is it hard because you have to sterilize bottles, pump,....but baby will drink it in 10 min and can go back to sleep and you can pump whenever you have time and whatever schedule is better for you. Or just alternate sometimes give your breast and sometimes bottle.
good luck

I only have one, but she was the exact same. Before she was born, I told myself I would breastfeed for a year. However, after the first couple of months, I changed my goal due to the high number of feedings and the looooong duration of each feeding. I decided to try for 6 months. At her 6 month appointment, I discussed with her doctor about her still feeding every 2-3 hours for an hour each time at 6 months. She agreed that mot 6 month olds are very good at feeding and she just wasn't there yet. However, something just changed over night. Before she turned 7 months, it got soooo much better. I was really glad I stuck with it and ended up breastfeeding for 14.5 months. I probably would have gone longer, but she weaned herself.

Long story short, I know your pain!! Stick in there if you can. I was sooo thankful that I did (but I also didn't have a two year old as well). I wish I could bring you better news, but it took until she was 6.5 months before it got better. I am a horror story though. The average baby is really good at 2-3 months old. Good luck and keep sticking with it!

How much better will it get?

100% mom, your confidence as a mother will return, the feedings will get less and less and your baby will be healthier and you will save money on formula. Its a comfort to know that the only thing a baby really NEEDS is you.

keep on going, the pain and fright will soon be a distant memory

She really shouldn't be eating that long. Maybe try to give her a pacifier?? It will help her with wanting to suck on something. She should really only be eating for about 30 minutes each feeding... 15 min. on either side. Until my daughter was 8 months, I couldn't sit relaxed or comfortably while nursing. I had to lay a certain way on the bed and EVERY time I nursed her the side I was laying on went to sleep. It was horrible. But I promise, it DOES get easier. You'll learn her cries and whines and so on. She may not be hungry.... she may just want something to suck on, or someone to hold her.

Those first 3 months are really tough. Not only does it seem like they nurse all the time but mine would nurse for up to an hour. I would get an hour break and then I'd be nursing again. I can't imagine having a 2 year old to deal with as well. If you can make it another couple of months, it does get better. Mine is now a 5-10 minute nurser.

it will get better, I know that proly doesnt help much right now for you and Im sorry I cant offer more than that! Every baby is different and its hard to say when your nursing sessions will get better but just know that they will! My oldest wasnt even 2 when my youngest daughter was born. I tried to always have things were she could reach the, in case I was nursing. I filled water bottles with apple juice and milk, kept snacks in the lower cupboard and made sure there was always a movie in the dvd player so if i needed to I could just hit a button! I also would keep books and picture albums by the couch where I nursed, my oldest like to sit with me and looking at the albums and reading the books was something we could do when I was nursing the baby. I over stressed about my house and cooking and laundry and I had to learn to just let some of that go. My baby had acid reflux so I was constantly caring for her and I was to tired to do everything. I tried to make alot of easy dinners and bought things my husband could do, like Hamburger Helper. It wasnt ideal but it got the job done until I was able to do more. On days when I did have time I would make alot of food and keep it for leftovers. You could also try pumping and giving your baby a bottle and see if that satisfies her a little longer, sometimes it does and sometimes it doesnt. Just make sure you pump to keep your supply up. Hang in there and good luck!

It definitely sounds like she's using you as a pacifier. When she's nursing, is she sleeping? Is she swallowing at regular intervals? If you notice that she's not really sucking, I'd break her latch and give her a pacifier. You might risk nipple confusion, but at 2 weeks old, she should be fine. Keep an eye on the clock though. You'll want to make sure that you're nursing her every couple of hours still. Sometimes sucking on the pacifier can mask hunger.
I would also look into getting some type of sling or wrap to put the baby in so you can tend to your toddler. I used a Moby and I LOVED it. My baby is 1 and we still use it when we're out and about.

Failed? That's kind of harsh.

The first 6 weeks of life are called 'unsettled' for a reason: newborns are unpredictable and needy... and their needs are unpredictable and unschedulable. So are your toddler's. Just as she needs you *when* she trips and scrapes her hands without pre-planning it, your newborn needs to eat when she's hungry, even if that's 12 seconds after the last time she was starving to death.

It is normal for humans to feed between 8 and 50 times in 24 hours, with feedings lasting anywhere between a few seconds and 40 minutes. It is often nothing more than expecting the feeding patterns to be predictable, or 'normal' or scheduled that interferes with success in breastfeeding.

Get a wrap or a sling, strap her on, give her free access and get on with your life. But remember, that you're post-partum and you need a lot of rest, too. When mother leaves, perhaps you could ask friends and other family members to help you do what 'anyone' can do (laundry, shopping, dishes, cooking) so you can get enough rest and take care of the baby...

For me it got better after week 4 - a lot better! We still kept the cluster feedings at night, but during the day I think we went to 15 min sessions every 2-3 hours.
My duaghter had a growth spurt at 2 and 4 weeks and was breastfeeding literally 24/7 during these spurts (about 2 days at a time). I was in tears and terrified I wasn't making enough milk - but it is REALLY normal.
As for managing with a 2 year old... ASK for HELP and accept it when offered. I am sure you've had plenty of friends offering to "help out when the baby is born" - now is the time to call in those friends!
I tell this to my pregnant firends all the time and I mean it. I have no problem picking up my friend's two year old to take her to the playground for a few hours with my daughter...
Good luck!

First of all, if you tried to breatfeed, and your baby got anything at all, give yourself a break---you did not fail! :)

The first 6 weeks were the roughest for me, and gradually over time, it got better. But I think our case was more extreme--our son would nurse for up to 1.5 hours at a time (he was very inefficient due to a high palate, poor nursing reflex, an overbite & being a little tongue tied). I had to work really hard to keep him awake long enough to eat enough so that he's sleep for at least 1.5 hours.... it was no fun at first. By about 2 months, he was down to 45 minutes per feeding, and then, over the next few months, he was down to 20.... Most babies are not as extreme as this, and most start at 30 minutes and work down from there over time....

Maybe if she is wanting to just feed a few minutes then sleep, then feed again in a few minutes, you can work on keeping her awake so she'll nurse longer -- when my son was newborn, I did what I called "wiggling his chicken wing" -- when he was nursing, I'd wiggle the arm that I could reach, sort of like you wiggle a chicken leg or wing to see if the a roasted chicken is done. I also tickled him, pretty much anywhere that would keep him awake... and I also used a cold wash cloth a few times....

I might want to think about making a space, like the living room, gated off where you can put up a playpen, and have your 2yo's toys/movies, etc., and a cooler of snacks and drinks/water for yourself, and just use that as the main place. Make a temporary diaper changing area for them there, so you don't have to troop around the house to get that part done.

I also encourage you to think about getting a sling or other baby carrier (like a Maya wrap or mei tai). Carrying your baby with you will keep your baby so much happier & less fussy when she is right up close to you.

Lastly, all those people who want to come over and visit or offer to help----Take them up on it. Tell people if they want to come & visit, they need to bring dinner or be willing to take the 2yo for a walk or to play outside, or be willing to do a load of dishes or laundry. Most people just want to help out. If no one offers, put a call in to 2 or 3 of your closest friends, even ones who don't like kids, and ask them for a hand and let them know you need help; set up a schedule for them to come & help you out once or twice per week. If you're part of a church, let them know you'll be needed in help and if there anyone who can lend a hand, it would be appreciated. It's okay, when asking, to sound a little desperate, and let the people know you really need help and any little bit is appreciated.

See if your DH can pitch in more, and take your son out in the evening for some play, to give you a break. Also, make him buy or make dinner, if possible. :)

I am certainly not an expert in this but I would suggest that you talk to a Lactation Specialist, you should be able to talk to one through the hospital where you had your little one. Or talk with someone from the local La Leche League. They get a majority of their nutrition during the first 10 minutes or so that they begin to nurse at your breast. The rest of the time is basically stimulating your breast to produce more milk and for comfort for them. The stimulation of your breast is important for increased milk supply so you can't discourage it completely.
Have you thought about getting a sling that would enable you to nurse AND be up and moving around, attending to things around the house while she nurses? My daughter used an "o ring sling" that was really great for that purpose!!! Here is the website that I found that shows the different type of slings that you can purchase. http://babyrooslings.com/
You also might want to look into some things that could help boost your milk supply, that could help explain her excessive nursing. ( Although newborns spend a LOT of time nursing!!!!) .Go to your local health food store and ask about the teas and supplements that people use to increase their milk production.
Congratulations on your new little one and just continue to enjoy that wonderful bonding time as you are nursing her...there is just nothing better in the whole wide world!!!!!!

Hi Heidi
I breast fed my son and it is very hard but rewarding.One of the reason that they feed so much in the first 6 weeks is that they are building up the milk supply and also they are growing so fast.
It does get easier and a routine will settle in.
Saying that you have a two year old as well (I used to sleep when baby slept which is not possible for you)
Do you think you could express the daytime feeds and put the milk in a bottle which will take quicker to feed the baby and breast feed when 2yr old in bed and during the night.
Breast feeding is a way more time consuming than formula and that really won't change but just gets easier.
Make sure you are eating wholesome foods to keep your strength up .
If it gets too much you could introduce one bottle of formula a day.This won't dry up your milk supply,just decrease it a bit

Best of luck
B.

Those first few weeks are so hard! I found that if I set short term goals I was able to get through it. At first I said, I'm going to do this until she's four weeks old, then I made to that point and then I said until she's three months old, then I made it to that point and I said I will continue to 6 months old. At six months old, I was laid off so continued until she was 9 months old and I started a new job. Hope this helps.