Biting-- Help

I know some wont agree with this approach...but I had the same problem with my daughter for a while. I started to bite back....needless to say...she stopped.

I was a biter as a toddler. My mom eventually bit me back and said "Biting Hurts!" She said the look on my face was of shock that my mom would bite me. But I never bit again.

I really think that just patience is the key. The biting will stop in time. It will take time no matter how you deal with it. I personally feel that teaching non-retalliation and patience are more important than stopping most behaviors quickly. When kids learn to express themselves in other ways (and you can offer other ways to express themselves by just repeating and repeating and modeling positive expressions of frustration) the violence stops.

I am not judging moms who say to bite back. Moms always do what they feel is best, but in my family, we've learned to wait bad behaviors out patiently and I really feel good about it and it has worked beautifully. It isn't easy, though, especially when its another kid they are hurting. good luck to you.

I have always heard the to cure the biter is to bite him back! Not hard by any means, but just so that they understand firsthand how it feels. Everyone I have talked to says this method works.

We had ther same problem to with our 3 yr. old son. He would bite his little sister alot and he would leave bruises on her all the time. He was a little out of control behavior wise also due to the fact that dad was over in iraq for a year didn't help much with the situtation either. I fianlly got it under control when i would put him in a time out chair and it works wonder and everytime he would bite that's where he would go for 1 min or longer depending on what he did wrong. Now he gets the corner for when he misbehaves. Hang in there,it's gets better.

Hi V.,

We had problems with our twins biting as well around that age. I have to agree with Michelle. As much as others may not agree, when my daughter would bite her brother or one of us, I'd bite her back and popped her mouth and let her now that was HUGE no-no. She's drawn blood on her brother's shoulder, face, and arm. I didn't bite as hard as she bit but it got her attention & quickly taught her that biting hurts.

We tried time out and that technique is pointless with my daughter. She quickly got the message that Mommy was in charge and she stopped biting. My son picked it up briefly but didn't like the consequences either. We rarely have biting problems now.

A.

It sounds like you are doing what you can. Some kids are biters. Sorry. I would just continue to be consistent with the firm "no" and maybe a modified time-out. He will grow out of it.

My daughter was a biter. She started at 18 months when she started school and it got bad, fast. The teachers asked me if I would allow them to try and get her to stop. I had been unable to do this on my own. What we did was buy her a teething ring, not fluid filled. She carried this around wherever she went. Either on a string or in a pocket. When she started to act like she wanted to bite, she was instructed to bite the ring. She was told that we don't bite other people because it hurts them, if you want to bite something bite your toy. Within a week she was broken of this habit. We kept the ring around for a few more weeks just in case, but we never needed it. Best of luck with your little one.

oh man i was glad when this phase got over with my 25 month old twin girls. This did start around 16 or 17 months. Even though lasted for 2 or 3 months, i felt it was like forever.
I am a first time mom, so i got very stressed out with this.
I think this is when i introduced the time outs :)
I put the twin girl against the wall and told it was bad and gave all the attention to the other twin. Both girls are at home with a nanny when i am at work. And you have to be consistent and then eventually it will reduce and then stop. And I think this is the only time i have spanked them on their butts 'cause this scared me to death. The spanking was 'casue i didn't know better. Now i research more on the web about the changes they are going through. And we are teaching the kids how to avoid when the other one is upset and ready to hit or bite. Right now we are in the beautiful "Terrible 2s" :) fun fun fun.

My cousin did that when he was little--only not from frustration, just from pure mischief. Literally tormented his older brother. My mom babysat him, and when he decided to bite her, she bit him back--didn't draw blood, but hard enough to hurt. He never bit anyone again. If you've tried everything else, try this--but don't do it when you are angry. Be calm and afterwards explain why you did it (so that he knows what it feels like). This should probably be a last resort, but it usually works.

Babies/toddlers are so self-centered that they don't understand that their actions affect other people. You child probably doesn't really understand what that feels like to another person. He just knows that he gets a reaction! My son went through a biting stage at 17 months too and nothing any of the experts books said to do worked, so one day in frustration after seeing him bite his cousin, I went over and just bit him (I was so ashamed of my behavior - I mean, I'm a college educated person and I stooped to his level of behavior to make a point...) And I made sure that it was enough to leave a mark and that he felt it. Then I said something like "biting hurts people" I wasn't sure at first if it did the trick or not, but he never did bite again. I am not saying that is what it will take to get through to your child, I just know that it worked for us.
Also, by 17 months, your child should be using vocal language - lots of one word sentences and a couple of 2 word sentences. Sometimes we get so excited about the sign language that we forget to teach them to speak! I just wanted to caution you here.