Biting - Saint Paul, MN

Updated on August 05, 2009
A.M. asks from Saint Paul, MN
8 answers

Hello!

I have a biter. It is only at daycare and typically at only one child. He did not bite at all last week and now today, first day back at daycare for the week, he bit this child again. The daycare provider and I were rewarding him with a sticker at the end of the day. Any other suggestions? I know it is normal for a child his age (2), but still it would be great to get through this phase. thanks!

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L.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

Remember two is still very little. His mind, understanding, and empathy still have a loooong way to develop.

Although it's a phase, I'd have the daycare keep the one child he has problems with away from him for a few weeks or so. (prevent it from happening) Also, when he's frustrated, jump right in there and voice his feelings. Give him words and communication he can use instead of the biting.

L., mom to a former hitter. :P

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S.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hang in there A.! I am a in-home daycare provider and have experienced this with a few of the children in my care. For most children it is done because they are not yet able to communicate but not always. I've also seen it because they need to bite on something because they are teething as well. This is something that does take patience and understanding by the parents of the bitee and the biter. Your child will work through this at some point. Hopefully your daycare provider handles the situation in a calm manner. Have a great day! S. M.

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L.E.

answers from Sioux Falls on

My cousin had the same problem, her daycare used a rag soaked in vinager. (kept in fridge in baggie, one for ea. child that bites) If they bite someone they have to bite the rag. She said he only did it twice, and that took care of it.
good luck

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A.C.

answers from Madison on

Has daycare watched him interact with the child he occasionally bites? Because he's only biting the one child, I'd say he either really doesn't like him and doesn't know how to articulate that (thus, the biting), or the child is teasing, bullying, in some other way making your son upset and hence, the biting. Perhaps the two of them need to be separated. If there is more than one 2-year-old room, it might be a good idea to have one in one room and the other in the other room and see if that helps stop the biting.

I'm betting it probably will.

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C.S.

answers from Omaha on

my oldest was a biter and now my 2 year old is doing it too. The best thing that the provider can do it try to catch him before he bites, i know it is hard and my little girl will bite anyone so I have problems catching her before.

With my daughter i started by just telling her that that hurt the other child and showing her the mark but she has gotten worse lately so I have started boping her on the mouth when she bites and telling her no biting. I don't hit her hard just enough to focus her attention and get a reaction.

My son was very stubborn and we actually ended up using a small drop of vinegar on his tongue when he bit. We would let it sit for a moment and then give him a drink of milk to neutalize the vinegar, that worked well but he was closer to 3 at the time.

Basicaly what ever method you guys pick you just have to be very consistant and make sure he and the other child are watched to help prevent it from happening.

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M.H.

answers from Appleton on

A. - I feel for you. This is not an easy one! Unfortunately, biting happens a lot in daycare settings. The main reason simply due to the environment and the amount of competition for toys, etc. Unfortunately at this age your son cannot communicate that well and has learned that a good bite to the kid will stop him and your son will get what he wants. It could be teething, but more likely, it's a defense mechanism or just a way to ensure other children don't threaten his belongings/personal space. Only advise I can offer is to make sure to get down to his level and say "no" in a firm voice and remove your son from the situation immediately. (Time out). This will show him it's not okay and if he bites he loses ALL toys and has to sit out for awhile. May not work right away, but if you're consistent he should eventually get the message! Good luck!

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K.P.

answers from Fargo on

A.,
I went through this with my oldest when she was 2 (now she is 8). She only bit one child who was littler than her. It is totally normal, I learned. It is frustrating, I know, but consistency is key. The daycare provider would "remind" Mara that this hurts, and have her "help" comfort the one she bit.

It will pass. It helped when we taught her some simple sign language words, because at 2 she wasn't able to communicate verbally.
Good luck, K.

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S.S.

answers from Omaha on

I have to vote for the old fashioned parenting on this one. My son wasn't a biter, and he was bitten- horribly, at daycare by one little girl, and he did nothing in return. I finally told him, at 2 years of age, to bite her back- and he did- and she never bit him again. Then he went to trying to bite me- he only did it once, I bit him back on the finger, and he never bore his teeth to me again.

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