Birthday Cut-off for Kindergarten?

Keep in mind that in Kinder - the emotions/social actions etc are a HUGE chunk of Kinder - if they are not emotionally/socially ready then their learning will suffer from it.

Can he make friends? Can he handle a large room of crazy? Can he remain calm and does he have self help skills? Will he get lost in the shuffle or find his way on his own? These are all things you need to be aware of. I think it is best to hold off a year personally.

I had two later birthdays and let them go.

His personality is not going to change in a year or ever. Holding him back because he is sensitive is only going to make him bigger and more of a target.

I am one of those parents who thinks the holding back is getting out of hand. My kids were all of the youngest in their grades and were still some of the best students.

Hold off a year. I'm a preschool/kindergarten teacher of 27 years and it's usually what I tell parents. You can always help them whether they're above or below the 'norm', but it's hard to fix a broken head or heart at 14.
I just say it's another year to grow and you'll never get that back.

My son is a very sensitive soul as well. His birthday is September 1. The cut off is August 31. I wanted to start him as a new 5 year old and test him in Kindergarten. BOY AM I GLAD I WAITED. He started as a 6 year old and has been having nothing but good experiences in school since then. He is now 9, in 3rd grade, and he just took tests to qualify for the Highly Capable next year. He is one of the oldest in his class and he is fine with that. In fact, I think he is better than fine. He has tons of friends, loves school, and doesn't seem fazed at all that he is a bit older. He does notice when people are a bit younger.
My girlfriend has a son who is a late August birthday and they put him in Kindergarten as a new 5. He has had nothing but problems in school for the past 2 years. He is in 1st grade and he HATES school, hates his teachers, and in fact has been switched out of a couple of classes. I truly believe that if she had waited one more year he would be a bit more successful.
It doesn't matter if your kid knows the ABC's or 123's it matters how he is behaving socially and emotionally. Are his feelings easily hurt? Is he a follower? Is he going to be able to stick up for himself? Can he follow directions easily? When he is frustrated does he cry? I asked myself all of these questions with my son and decided that based on my answers I wanted to give him one more year at home and preschool. I am SO GLAD I did.
L.

My son's birthday is on the cut off day as well. We decided to have him wait. My reason: I taught Middle School for many years and while there may not be a big difference in the early years, by the time they (especially boys) reach Middle School, there is a HUGE, HUGE difference.
Anyone who decides to put their boys in the situation where they will be the youngest in their class needs to spend a day or two observing Middle School kids (here again, mainly boys). It's a jungle out there and I wouldn't recommend putting any boy in the scenario where they are almost a year behind in maturity (height, weight, hair, voice change, etc...).
Just my two cents,
R.

We have an October baby. He is academically gifted. He could easily count to one thousand and beyond when he was five. We did not choose to "challenge" the system - although he easily would have "tested in."
He is now an 8 and a half year old 2nd grader. It was the greatest gift to him to have that emotional/social maturity. He has thrived as one of the older kids in his class (there are a few July/Aug b-days in his group).

My birthday is Aug.22 and my husband is Oct. 1 and we both were youngest children in our classes. We both struggled a bit socially, especially in late gradeschool and middle school. Also, I almost didn't make it through my fresman year of college and my husband didn't make it. We were too young to leave home.

I'm sure you will make the best decision for your child and your family. I just want you to consider the future. Do you really want to be sending a 17 year old to college? That extra year will make all the difference in his self confidence for the future.

You are lucky if his birthday is right on the border. Just tell him that he was a "school cut off" birthday and that it wasn't completely your choice.
I hate the phrase "held back." I prefer "red shirted."

You are the best parents for your child.

Go with your gut!
My daughter turned 5 yesterday and i'm not enrolling her this year. She is not emotionally ready. My son was 6 when he started and I think it was a good decision. His bday was late but I still would of waited. If he's not ready, he isn't. My daughter isn't, and I will stand by my decision. If you push him in there, what benefit will that have? I figure the kids are going to have many many years to go to school, just because they are 5 it doesn't mean its a automatic! Good luck!

What's the hurry?
They will be in school for a very long time & at home with mom for such a short time, so why hurry to stick them in school?

I always say wait! The issue is not readiness for kindergarten, it's how he will do in the long run (like the MS teacher below points out). I was put ahead and found it difficult all the way through college. Some will say 'it's only a year what's the big deal?' As someone who's been there it really is a big deal. It's not the academics, it's the social part. For a boy, it's also about sports. Come high school, he will be the youngest or the oldest trying out for the teams. He will obviously fair better as the oldest. One more year in a preschool program will not stunt him academically. Sounds like a lot of people in his life agree to wait. Enjoy the time together with him.

I don't think there is a "right" answer. We've just gone through this, and decided to keep our son at home for another year. He'll start Kindergarten this fall and turn six a few months later. My husband and I really struggled with this decision. At 4 our son was reading and very outgoing, but incredibly sensitive. In just a few months, the emotional maturity he has undergone is astounding. I am so glad we waited. The bonus? We hadn't factored in that during this extra year at home, he and his younger brother would become best buds. Before, his brother was always "too young" to do all the things he liked to do, but this year, his younger brother is old enough to join in and they play together really well. Good luck with your decision.

My 5 yo son made the cut off by 3 days, and is currently in kindergarten. He is also a sensitive one, but his transition to K was wonderful. He has done so well. He is ahead in math and reading books by himself already. I am so glad we didn't wait!
Socially/emotionally, he has adjusted wonderfully. However, I don't think I would have done it if he weren't in daycare/preschool full time prior to starting K. The work his preschool teacher put into getting him ready was fundamental in his success.

Why not put him in Kindergarten and see how he does? If you decide at the end of the year that he's not up for First Grade, then have him repeat Kinder in a different classroom. Then at least you have the choice. If you keep him in preschool, there's no choice, and he'll always be a year behind most of his peers in school.

A recent article in the NY Times by a professor of education at Harvard (it may have been Princeton) stated that multiple peer-reviewed studies have shown that the youngest kids in the class actually have a leg up academically AND socially on their peers not just in school, but throughout their lives. Yeah, I know, hard to believe - but true. Bottom line, younger children benefit tremendously learning from their older peers. They go on not only to have better grades on average, but they go farther in their education and end up making more money, again this is on average. There will always be exceptions. But my point is this - don't second-guess your child. Let him do it, and expect him to do well. He's likely to surprise you. My younger daughter actually skipped a grade ahead (against my better judgment) and is flourishing. I couldn't be more surprised at how well she's doing - she is somewhat immature for her age to begin with, but absolutely loves school and is doing extremely well. Who knew?

My teacher friends always tell me, that it's best for "boys" to be older for their class then younger....

I can't see why you would think he'd flunk kindergarten. He appears to be smart. Putting a smart child in pre-school again would be easily boring to them. There are lots of kids out there that have never been to pre-school or child care that go to kindergarten fresh from staying at home all day. The have a lot of maturing to do to. That is what kindergarten is for.

I think a child needs to be with the kids their own age.

Put him with the kids his age. If he struggles during the year still wait until right at the end to decide if you want him to do a transitional 1st grade if your school district offers something like that. My daughter was not mature enough to do well in kindergarten but really did well in the transitional first. She was quite able to move up the next year too.

Both my daughters are September girls and in MI the cutoff is still Dec 1 so although its not really a question to hold back, people still do hold their children back here also.

I however, did not, hold my girls back. My oldest is in 1st grade now and doing great academically and socially even though she is also very sensitive and shy. For me, I could not hold her back for being those things as I have been those things the majority of my life and still can be. And what, more than anything, forced me to come out of my shell but being put in situations where I was forced to open up. Now as an adult, most who come into contact with me would say actually say I'm very social. But deep down I enjoy my quiet time and being with those I'm most comfortable around. Oh and I was also, a younger student for my grade. Do I think holding me back would have made a difference, not in the least. I would have still been sensitive and shy but older. And I can honestly say, each year my daughter is getting better and better socially.

But...to each their own. Only you know your child. The truth is, either way your son will adapt, its just a personal choice.

Hold him back a year. I have two boys, birthday Oct 15 and Aug 12. My oldest son had the October birthday and was sooooo ready for school. The preschool teacher had let him start at age 2 because he was there and ready (I nannied and took the 3 year old to preschool. The 3-year old cried because he had to go to preschool, my 2 year-old cried because he couldn't go. It was ridiculous). Anyway, I tried to push him ahead, but I couldn't find a school district that would let him start early. I was very frustrated, but when he did go to kindergarten I found a full day program to put him into. Fast forward 8 years. My younger son turned 5 last August and I was faced with the same dilemma as you. I got opinions from my son's friends and their parents. One had a boy with an August birthday and held him back. The kid and parents are very happy about that decision. One had a boy with a July birthday and pushed him forward. The mom said it was the worst thing she could have done. Her son has struggled in school and she thinks that extra year would have helped tremendously. The clincher though was my son who told me how glad he was that I didn't start him early. I know that every child is different, but in my opinion I am doing the right thing waiting.
Sports is one place that it makes a huge difference. Your son will be older, more mature, and bigger when it comes to playing school sports, and that year makes a huge difference for a while. One drawback though is that I found it necessary to ensure that my oldest son was in a school district with an accelerated program. He is doing very well, blah, blah, blah, but it has been difficult for him to make neighborhood friends since he doesn't go to the neighborhood school. That is really a minor drawback though in my opinion.

I did that.
With both my kids.
Both my kids, turned 5, after they were in Kindergarten.
They are born late.
They are fine.
We entered them into Kindergarten, because they were ready.
I have a son and daughter.

But yes, you also need to consider emotional and social maturity.
In a neutral way.

But, being "sensitive" is not something that a child grows out of, per age. But their ability to handle and manage their emotions... will develop. IF there is also parental guidance on it, and them being taught about coping-skills and how to handle situations and their emotions. Of which, even young children can learn. I taught my kids that beginning since they were 2 years old. Both my kids are sensitive in different ways.
MANY kids are "sensitive." It is childhood.
But you need to teach them, coping-skills and self-management. In age appropriate ways.
Being in school, ALSO helps to teach them that.
A sensitive child, no matter what... needs to learn, via the parents, on how to positively cope and manage, and how their being "sensitive" can empower them. So they don't feel that being sensitive, is a bad thing.

OR, see if your child's school has a "Jr.K" program?
This is usually for late born kids.

fulll day or half day? how much has he been in preschool?

I have a current kindergardener (girl 2nd oldest in the class..born 20 days after the cutoff) she is doing great.. at the top of her class. she is in a half day program.

In our experience kinder learning is very very slow.. they work on letters writing letters for 2 months.. they might do simple 1 digit addition one time every month.. they start reading in January..."I see a dog. The dog sees me'" they have 20 sight words they should know by the end of hte year.

If he is academically ready.. and normal socially and emotionally -- I would send him. see how it goes.. if it doesnt work.. you can always pull him out of school and try again next year.. or have him finish the grade and repeat it the following year.

You really wont know until you try.. and he will continue to grow and mature from now till hte start of school. I would find a half day program if it is available in your area.

My son barely made the cutoff for K as well. We enrolled him anyways. He is now in first grade and I have actually thought about holding him back. He is ADHD so he is behind socially. He does much better when he plays with the current Kindergarteners. I won't hold him back now because he is really tall and he also has friends in his grade but if I could do it over I would have waited another year. It would have only helped him. There wouldn't be any negative that I can see because he wouldn't have known any different.
Just my two cents.

I have 3 kids.

My youngest birthday is August 28, the cut off is Dec so she just turned 5 and I let her start Kindergarten, most of her friends are older then her. If it didnt pan our she would have just done Kindergarten again. She's in 3rd grade and doing fantastic but she is the 'smallest' in her class.

My oldest birthday is January 18 so he would have been 5 and half starting Kindergarten but he was advanced from everyone in his class so he was there for 2 months and 'moved' into the 1st grade. I thought he may not be 'socially/emotionally' ready but he was amazing. He was 16 when he started his senior year of high school and is currently in college and all his friends are currently celebrating their 20th and 21st birthdays, my son just turned 19. He's the laziest kid I have right now but he is very smart. lol

My middle child is July so he was 5 for two months before entering Kindergarten and did well. In fact he graduates in June turing 18 after graduation.

Id be afraid that holding an academically ready child would do more harm. I let my son skip kindergarten because I was MORE afraid he would be SO BORED in kindergarten that he would act out and it would work against him. And Im sure my decision helped him by keeping him challenged.

There is not harm in letting your child into kindergarten, if it does not work out you can pull him out. Since he has been in preschool he should be fine.

Good luck.

As a kindergarten teacher myself...I say send him.

Let him go and evaluate at the end of year. He can always repeat K.

My son has a July birthday, and the cutoff here is Sept 1. We sent him to preschool at 3 years, because he was ready for ... something. It was just 2 mornings a week, and the 4 year old class was 3 mornings a week. It was always on my mind, and towards the end of his 4 year old year it became very apparent to me and to his teachers that he was not as mature as the other kids in his class. He was doing well, the teachers said he was very bright and he got along with everyone. But he definitely got upset more easily than other kids, and there were just lots of little things I noticed that were just not on par with the other kids.

PreK in Illinois is not an option for kids who are age eligible for kindergarten. I didn't really want my son to go to a new school for one year and then have to start a new school again the following year, but that was the plan for awhile. We were planning to send him to a private school for one year to attend PreK.

That's when I found out we are the luckiest people in the world, because our school district approved the money to begin "Transitional Kindergarten." Over the summer all incoming kindergarten kids are screened so that they can somewhat group the classes. One of the classes was for anyone who might not quite be ready for kindergarten. My husband wanted me to keep my mouth shut and see what the school said after the screening. I was asked if I was open to the idea, and I said I was. I received a phone call a few weeks later inviting our son to be in that class. I gladly accepted.

He is doing great! At our parent/teacher conference, the teacher (who has been teaching kindergarten for 20 years) reflected on this class and on some of the younger kids in her previous classes. She thought about how much some of those kids would have really benefited from this experience and the extra year to mature.

He'll go to kindergarten next year at age 6, and I believe he will do great. For us it really had to do with socialization and maturity. We really wanted him to be about where his classmates were. When I observed him in preschool he seemed like the baby of the class. I just really didn't want him to always feel like the baby of the class. And I didn't want him to feel like he was always struggling to keep up with the other kids. I also thought about the fact that maturity issues will always be a part of school. Some young kindergarteners do great ... until 3rd grade or until junior high. I just didn't like the idea of him feeling like he was always behind.

I talked to so many parents before we made this decision. I did talk to a couple of parents who sent their young kindergartener and were very happy with their decision. I also talked to several who said they were thrilled they had waited and many who said they wish they would have waited. But I didn't hear one parent say they wish they had sent their child sooner.

The decision was definitely right for us. No regrets here!

My son was born 3 days after the cut off of Sept. 1st and he's in Kinder now. I still wonder if it was the right decision to not push him ahead. I asked many parent and teachers beforehand, and most of them said to keep him in his correct grade so he is the older kid on the class. At this point, he is asking if he can move up to 2nd grade next year. He knows he is doing more at home academically than his class is doing and I know he could handle it. He's enjoying Kindergarten socially, but is certainly a leader and not challenged much. I'm not comfortable with the idea of him being the youngest in his classes from now on either though. I don't know what the answer is really, but I appreciate the question for all of us who are going through it.

I have almost the exact same experience as MamaDuck P., (3 days from the cutoff), with the exception that my son is on the autism spectrum. He is extremely sensitive and that will never change, and Kindergarten has been so good for him academically and socially. He is ahead of most of his classmates academically, and has become a little less shy. I'm glad we challenged him and didn't have him wait another year. And he was in full-day pre-K so the year before, which made the transition to K easier.

I'm very pro sending your kids. I don't think holding them back results in the advantages that many parents hope for. I am more inclined to send them and have them repeat kinder if necessary than to spend another year in preschool.

My son will be 5 this May. He's both academically and socially ready, so I'm definitely sending him. I'm glad not to have to make the decision. My daughter is an October bday, so we'll see what happens with her.

I was born at the end of September, and my parents decided to have me tested to see if I could go into Kindergarten at age 4. I passed with flying colors, but I have always felt that I was behind socially. I was super shy and matured later than the other children in my class which always made me feel awkward.

My oldest son's birthday was a week after the cut off date for Kindergarten here, so I decided to put him in the next year. He turned 6 a week into his Kindergarten year. He is also shy, and I feel that it was the best idea to do this. There are even a few kids who are older than him, so I don't feel that he is that much different than the others.

I am a Special Education teacher, and I have plenty of students who were put into school too early and are just not up to par with their classmates. I always suggest that people wait to make sure the child is 5 or to wait until the next year if the child is not mature enough to sit through 7 hours of school. I see too many children who were forced to go to school before they were ready who have problems fitting in, sitting still, sharing, and even using the bathroom!

If you have any question about putting him in early, don't do it! He will not suffer if you wait until he is 6. Boys really do need that extra time to mature, and you will just be doing him a favor in the long run.

Good luck to you!

I struggled with that question last year. For us it came down to the question where will he be stimulated most? Preschool was definitly not enough any more....he was asking for longer days at school! Yes, he struggled with some impulse control and emotional control...but not enough to squash his desre to want more. I would be putting him into all day and i was quite worried for him! He was ready in so many other ways it was just that last peice he was missing. We decided to put him into all day kindergarten and i am so glad we did. We definitly had some adjustment period to deal with but he is doing awesome. I say take a look at your son and listen to him and not all the 'experts' that say hold a boy back for emotional development. As moms we do know what is best for our sons.

in our school district there was like a little test they made kids do the summer before they would start kindergarten.. they would go to the school and a few teachers would be there and do little activities with them and just observe/evaluate them and make a decision wether they recommended the child to start school or not.. after that they had a pre-kindergarten program for one month in the summer for those kids that would be on the younger side to get them ready for school.. and it wasnt just for kids who were right on or past the cut off.. my birthday was mid september the cut off was october 1st .. i went through all that.. there were kids in the program whos birthdays were july and august too .. and also those who were after the cut off.. i started school that year with no problem.. honestly if your area doesnt do any of these things but the preschool teacher thinks without a doubt that hes ready i dont think u have anything to worry about sending him this year id go for it

Well, I'm not the mom of a kindergartener, but I am a teacher. I would say to hold off a year... I teach 4th grade and I still see the differences, especially in boys, in maturity, impulse control and emotional security when kids are the younger ones. It's not universal, of course, but it's very common. If he were mine I'd wait.