Behavior Problems - Boynton Beach,FL

Updated on September 22, 2009
M.L. asks from Boynton Beach, FL
9 answers

Hello moms! I was wondering if any of you have gone through this before. My daughter just turned 13mos and is a lovely and well behaved baby. Well recently about a week ago, she has been throwing herself on the floor and hitting me if I discipline her. She does not do it all the time but does it at least once a day! I'm scared that she will develop some anger issues and that just freaks me out. Maybe I'm exaggerating but I just wanted to see what everyone thinks. Also she is going through separation anxiety as well and is also teething, so maybe this has something to do with it?? Thanks!z!

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L.H.

answers from Miami on

she is a BABY.
please oh please read some books about child development.
Dr. Sears is great!
It's wonderful that you're asking here, but who are we? LOL!
TALK to her ALL THE TIME. NARRATE to her all that she is experiencing. GIVE her the WORDS so that by the time she can say them she can express herself.
HOLD HER.
LOVE HER.

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M.R.

answers from Port St. Lucie on

Hi M.,

I had a similar experience with my daughter. My daughter's "tantrums" (for a lack of a better word) where out of frustration. An example of one of our melt downs occurrs when she would wants to color, but we have to run errands. Encourage your angel to express her frustration differently. Signing is a wonderful tool that allows children to display their frustration constructively. I also found, modeling the behavior I wanted helpful. I also rearranged our schedule to allow her enough time to color. I hope this helps and good luck.

Here is a link you might find helpful also. http://www.unitedwayuc.org/welcomebaby/playgroups/L17-Tem...

M.

1 mom found this helpful
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T.F.

answers from Orlando on

At her age, it's likely that your daughter is frustrated because she can't communicate. My first born was a very frustrated little boy, and once we started teaching him a few baby signs, he was a MUCH happier child! Other than a few words, he didn't really talk much until he was 3 so he not only liked and used the signs we taught him but he sort of made up a few of his own so he was able to communicate his needs to us. You can look up "baby sign language" online and get some basics to start with, like more, help, all done, etc. I know there are also some videos out there that you can watch with her-- check your library if they have videos as they may have a couple of them. Even if she has started saying a few words (in contrast to my first born, my daughter was talking 2 word sentences by her first birthday!), she still may be frustrated that she can't tell you everything she wants you to know. And I'm also wondering what you are disciplining her for-- try to be proactive and not have things she can get into so you don't have to tell her "no" very often, and try redirecting her as often as possible instead of telling her no

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D.G.

answers from Boca Raton on

Absolute totally normal toddler behavior. Frustration is big at this age. They are really opening up to the world right now, but are limited in their words and physical power. What are you disciplining her about and to what degree. I assume she wants something and you are telling her she can't touch it, since at this age they touch everything within reach. If that is the case, unless it is very dangerous, look at it with her. Let her hold it but look at it with her and show her the shape, texture, smell, etc. Her intention is to see what everything around her is. Take the time now, let other things wait and help her to take in all she can right now. It is a truly miraculous and wonderful time. When she has looked at it, tell her it's time to put it back and allow her to do it. If it is dangerous, take it away immediately, explain that you dont want her to be hurt in a calm and caring voice, and immediately distract her by replacing it with something she would love to see that isnt her normal toys, and then look at THAT with her. If she does throw a tantrum you can tell her its not ok to hit, but dont expect any response or change in behavior. They just dont have the ability to control that yet. Get yourself a good book on child development and discipline NOW. I wish someone had made that suggestion to me when my son was born. Its easier to read before they hit the stages than during it. It allows you to set up behavior patterns that make it easier to deal with issues that come up in the future. Good luck.

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S.M.

answers from Miami on

Could be her teething but my kdis would cry of the pain but it might also be the terrible 2's. My son started way before he turned 2. Its just a phase. Be patient that it will go away. Good luck!

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M.G.

answers from Tampa on

Maybe she is going through separation anxiety. Mention this to your pediatrician. Also, just keep in mind that we as parents just have to "dicipline" our children and we have to be "consistent." Please read the book The Strong Willed Child by Doctor Dobson. It will help you alot. Wish you the best

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K.M.

answers from Tampa on

Any changes in her food? Sometimes lack of B vits will do this, check out WestonPrice Foundation- they cover diet the best I have found them very helpful.
And then our stand-by has been YokaReader.com if nutrition doesn't handle behavior, she is amazing and has helped me change habits I got from how I was raised, and helped me do that to which I aspired.
k

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H.C.

answers from Orlando on

Your daughter is just going thru a normal developmental stage that every toddler goes through. They are frustrated because they don't have enough words to express what they want/feel/need, so teaching baby signs is a great thing, as the previous response said. Also, they go thru growth spurts, mentally, every six months. I like to refer to it as Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde, because that's what it feels like. My son is 20 mos & we just went thru a cycle of him having tantrums every day...throwing himself on the floor, etc. Then one day, they just stopped...occassionally he'll still throw one, but not nearly as often, nor as intense. Just hang in there, mama...it's perfectly normal, frustrating as it is!

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H.J.

answers from Tampa on

Welcome to the world of toddlerhood! She is testing boundaries and all you have to let her know is what is acceptable and what is not. Expect her to not like the word No or Stop. That is ok, say them anyway when appropriate. And your best friend right now is distraction. Having a fit cause she can't get her way? Distract her with another toy or activity. And sometimes you have to make sure she is safe (playpen, crib, etc) and just walk away until she is calmer (and you are too) and then start over. She will only develop anger issues if you do not take the opportunity to discipline her when you need to . And remember discipline doesn't mean punish but to teach. If she's hitting say "OUCH! you hurt mommy" and then have her show you "soft hands" how she can touch you gently or give a kiss. this is what we do with my son and occasionally he forgets but more often he will touch softly and say I'm sorry mommy. (hes 23 mos.) It does work just takes patience and time.

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