Bedwetting

Updated on May 04, 2008
C.Z. asks from Portage, MI
25 answers

My 4yr old is wetting the bed. He was trained right before his 3rd bday and for the last 6months he has been wetting the bed. Some nights he makes it through but 9 out of 10 he doesnt. Does anyone have any suggestions on what to try. Is this normal and if so how long does it last.

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P.L.

answers from Detroit on

My oldest had a problem till he was in his early teens we tried medication he ended up with more problems blood noses just one of them. then I started taking him to the chiroprator it was gone. My youngest is the same way but not as often. The chiroprator helps and since this was mentioned he needs to go again we had a accident the other night and he is 8. but here are some other things that will cause it stress (i.e a disruption in his life or normal routine), Colds, Allergies and Lack of sleep or poor sleep. Please try other things before the medication I am not happy with the side effects that my oldest suffered from and sometimes wonder if his behavioral problems now have something to do with that medicine.

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C.B.

answers from Detroit on

Some kids just sleep so deeply they don't "register" the need to go. There are those mattress mats that set off an alarm when the sleeper starts to pee.
It seems odd, that he was potty trained and then has accidents. But he is a 4 year old. It could be his sleep patterns, or maybe his bladder hasn't caught up with the rest of him (my one son had the occassional nighttime accident till he was 10 or 12. It was frustrating, but he eventually grew out of it. And I think it was his bladder just catching up in development.
Don't make my mistake and get too upset about it. 'Ooops!' probably works better, so that he doesn't feel he's committed an unforgivable sin. He's dry daytime, so that would seem more important.

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C.T.

answers from Detroit on

Hello C., I have a 4 year old boy who still wets at night and I have him wear a GOODNITE which is like a pull-up but for the night. Their bladder is still small and can't hold all the urine at night and the brain doesn't wake the child up when the bladder gets full to let them know its time for the bathroom. Instead of having to wash the sheets all the time try the GOODNIGHTS and save yourself and your child from having wet clothes. When my son wakes up in the morning we play a game where when I take it off I hold my nose and can't breath and make funny faces and he laughs. I toss it to the ground and it makes a thud and we go back and forth as to who is going to take it to the garbage.
Just give his bladder time to grow and don't worry, its normal.
Cindy

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J.K.

answers from Detroit on

My youngest son had a similar problem and we waited far to long to deal with it, hoping it would just "go away". Some things that DIDN'T work are, limiting the amount that he drank at night before bed, DDAVP prescription nasal spray, alarms on the bed. We actually went to a VERY expensive clinic in Farmington or Bloomfield (forget which) that charged us several thousand dollars, but by then our son was in 5th grade and we were desperate. It worked, though and here's how. They had our son drink increasing amounts of liquid through the day and hold his urine for as long as possible. When he finally went to the bathroom, they had him practice starting and stopping the flow to strengthen his bladder control. At night we had an alarm that went off as soon as he started to urinate. We had to get up with him and wake him up. We gave him a word he had to remember in the morning to make certain that he was completely awake before we let him go to the bathroom. It took several months, but he never wet the bed again. Make sure your son understands that it's a SLEEP disturbance, like sleepwalking. He'll deal with enough embarassment as he gets older.

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K.T.

answers from Detroit on

Been there. My son was trained for day for two full years before the nighttime wetness was put to bed ;)
His bladder wasn't ready. Tried as he might, he slept too soundly to wake up and couldn't hold it.
He transitioned from preschool to K last summer. He did really well in July and August (still in pre). Once September hit, he was back to pullups. By the time he'd adjusted to K, in October he was fine and hasn't had an accident since.
My advice is to wait it out for a little longer before a consult with your ped.

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D.M.

answers from Detroit on

OMG!! So normal!!! I am sure you are doint the basics (no late drinks, potty b/f bed, etc) My son was fully potty trained @ 2 1/2 but still wore pull ups. At 4 he refused pull ups (major issue w/ wearing "diapers") and would wet almost every night. I tried everything. What I realized is that all of the advice meant nothing b/c my son's body just wasn't ready yet. So I bought vinyl mattress covers and changed sheets ALOT. But he is 4 1/2 now and just stopped. Poof....just like that. He hasn't wet the bed in about 2 months now. Just be patient and know that it will get better. If you are really worried you can ask your MD just to be sure that there isn't a physiological/anatomical problem.

Hope you get dry nights soon!!!!

D

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S.R.

answers from Detroit on

Our 4 year-old still doesn't make it through the night without having to use the bathroom. He sleeps so soundly that he doesn't feel the urge to pee. We have him go right before he goes to bed and then we wake him up again before we go to bed (usually after 11:00) to have him go again. So you can try to wake your son. Another idea is to stop liquids after a certain time in the evening (no liquids after dinner, for example). This is something our friend, who is a pediatric urologist, did with his daughter to help her make it through the night.

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M.W.

answers from Saginaw on

C.,
I know your pain! My son was trained a month before he was two. Some would say that is young, but if they can do it, then it is not a problem. He wetted the bed almost every night. He had less bed wetting nights when he was three then when he was eight. We went to the doctors and did a bunch of medications, that didn't work. A lot of them made him mean and angry. So, we dicided to buy the bed wetting alarms. The good ones cost about hundred dollars. Totally worth it. I didn't have the instant success that they tell you on the ad, but he did it. What a relief for him! I don't believe the good nite pull ups are the answer. They are fine for the sheets and all, but what about our landfills! Good Luck and try not to get frustrated!

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K.D.

answers from Detroit on

There are quite a few books on the topic. I'm just starting and so I'm reading everything and the book "The Brazelton Way" by T. Berry Brazelton, M.D. and Joshua D. Sparrow, M.D. had a long section on the why's and what to do next.

Good Luck I can't imagine how frustrating it has to be,
K.

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N.C.

answers from Benton Harbor on

My stepson wet the bed at night till he was 8. I wouldn't worry about it too much. Maybe his bladder isn't fully developed and he just can't hold it that long. It's perfectly normal, although very frustrating. It will eventually stop.

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K.V.

answers from Detroit on

You might also want to look at any changes in his life. Has he gotten a new sibling, moved, started preschool, new daycare, disturbances with family life? Also make sure that he is getting enough sleep. It might not make sense but if he doesn't get to bed early enough, he might be overtired. Also make sure that he isn't holding it all day. If he gets too involved in play and doesn't want to stop, this can also cause an infection. If he is in preschool or daycare, maybe he is nervous about going to the bathroom or only allowed to go at certain times.

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C.E.

answers from Detroit on

Bedwetting is more common than you think. However a few things, talk to the doctor and rule out any problems, then you just have to deal with it. One thing I use to do was wake mine up during the night when they started with the bedwetting. My doctor said I made it worse by doing that. Both of mine are very very sound sleepers and when you do that, they child never fully wakes up no matter how convinced you may be. If they fall right back to sleep they were not awake completly and you are training the body that it is ok to urinate when they sleep. My ex wet the bed until he was almost 11. It is a very fustraiting problem and one that they will be embarassed about if you make a big deal and then you will have a child who is hiding it from you. My son's stepmother made my son feel very humiliated and 3 years later I'm still haveing him hide his sheets and get up ever early to take a bath so "Mom doens't know".

Try this website: http://www.bedwetting.ferring.ca/parents/welcome/index.html

It has some helpful information and place where parents and kids can talk about it.

Good luck

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C.S.

answers from Grand Rapids on

Hi C.,

My 6 year old just went through this. I took him to the doctor just to rule out any medical condition and he's fine. He's been growing so much lately that his bladder just hasn't caught up yet. We have been monitoring his liquid intake at dinner and evenings and for a while I was waking him up before I went to bed to use the bathroom. I purchased some waterproof pads for him to sleep on so I didn't have to strip all of his bedding when he wet. He's been doing much better and hasn't had an accident in quite a few weeks. I know it's frustrating when you know that they can hold it through the night and now it's happening. Don't get angry - it will only make it worse. Make sure you praise every day morning. Focus on the positive.

Good luck!
C.

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D.F.

answers from Detroit on

Just have him wear a pullup for bed, don't make a big deal out of it. When he continues to wake up dry put him back in his unders. One of my boys wore pullups to bed until he was about 5. He was just a sound sleeper.

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S.D.

answers from Grand Rapids on

My daughter actually went through some of this. She generally didn't soak through but she would have accidents and she has been potty trained since she was two. I didn't understand why it was happening. I talked with her and she really couldn't tell me either. I limited her drink intake at night and made sure she went to the bathroom before she got ready for bed and just after story time. It went on for only a couple of months and now she is back on track. Not sure if that helps.

Hang in there.

S.

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L.N.

answers from Benton Harbor on

My son was on the same timeline as yours and did the same thing. I was sure he didn't have a UTI or anything so I was pretty relieved when somebody on here suggested a growth spurt. That turned out to be the case as he grew out of it!

Good luck

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J.C.

answers from Grand Rapids on

My son was potty trained during the day by 2. He just turned 5 and we've had on-and-off times with bedwetting. He started having dry nights by 3 but then "regressed" when his baby brother came along, which did not surprise us. After months of pull-ups (which he would often take off himself in the night and then subsequently wet the bed AGAIN) and months of changing sheets, my husband started getting up in the middle of the night to take my son to the bathroom. In less than 2 weeks, my son started waking on his own to use the bathroom and has been mostly dry for a solid 6 months. I think this helped reset his circadian rhythm to allow him to wake up when he needs to go. The only times he wets the bed now are when he goes to bed too late or is physically exhausted. He'll sleep so deeply he doesn't awaken himself to use the bathroom. I would echo what others have said - to maintain a positive approach with your son. I know mine was so sensitive - sad and apologetic whenever he wet the bed. I spent many mornings comforting him and telling him how much I love him and encouraging him that we would work together to help him not wet the bed anymore. He would help me strip the bed and put the sheets in the laundry basket so we could share our frustration together.

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S.N.

answers from Detroit on

At this age, bedwetting is not uncommon, and may mean the child may need to develop (internally) a little more. Most peds won't treat bedwetting until after the age of six.

What to do?

Don't punish.

Do follow an evening routine in which you do reduce there liquid intake and naturally enforce that one last bathroom trip before bed.

Do use pull-ups if you don't like wet beds, for night use only.

Do discuss with your ped.

You note that you are a stepmom, are the children with you all of the time or is there joint custody? Something to consider, could the bedwetting also be a result of stress the child is feeling.

I had this problem with a couple of my children, after the age of six we used a bed wetting alarm system and it worked very well.

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E.K.

answers from Detroit on

Dear C.,
This is very common. The medical community won't even consider looking at bed wetting as a problem until they are in middle school - it is that common. It is genetic and the doctors that I ahve talked to always ask if either of the parents have had the same issue. I have had two children who have had this problem and it has been worse with my son. I have been doing some research, and I am starting to believe that diet plays a key role.
I would use pull ups for now and be very careful to not humiliate him for wetting the bed. Most kids are far more sensitive about it then we realize. And i believe the humiliation makes it worse and prolongs the condition.
Hope you find this info useful!
Good luck!

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M.K.

answers from Detroit on

My son had enuresis. A friend lent us the "alarm" that is set off when urination begins. See if they are sold in the store.

Good luck!!

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C.C.

answers from Detroit on

C.,

We're in the same boat. Our son was potty trained before he turned three and now we're having bed wetting issues-usually a couple times a week. We get him up a couple of hours after he goes to bed to go to the bathroom. It hardly even wakes him up and is easier to do than we originally thought.

Good luck!

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K.W.

answers from Grand Rapids on

I wet the bed until I was 12 years old. My mom took me to the chiropractor and the bedwetting was gone within 2-3 adjustments. People shun chiropractic care because the medical community has given it an unessecary bad name. If your bones are misaligned there's no telling what might be thrown out of wack. For me it was my pevlic bone putting stress on my bladder when I laid down. Your son may still be too young to help, but I highly recommend going to the chiropractor before spending money on doctors who cannot garuantee anything. Doctors are reactive, Chiropractors are proactive and are able to not only correct the problem, but prevent future complications.

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K.A.

answers from Detroit on

Each night, when you're about to go to bed, lift your son out of bed and take him to the bathroom--no lights, no noise, nothing. Just place him on the toilet, he'll most likely go within a minute or two. if he wakes up, just soothe him quietly. then just put him back to bed. worked for both of our kids, then one day, they were ready for the whole night again.

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K.G.

answers from Detroit on

My daughter also went from having dry nights for about 6 minths to suddenly wetting the bed every night. It is called secondary bed wetting. When I got tired of changing the sheets EVERY night we asked her if it would be ok if she wore a pull-up so her bed wouldn't get wet. She was ok with that. About two months ago she went back to underware and has been mostly dry. We do take her to the bathroom before we go to bed at about 11.
Blessings, K.

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L.K.

answers from Detroit on

Your son is probably a very sound sleeper and he just can't wake up when he needs to "go". It is a lot more common than you might think. My daughter had this problem and it continued until about 6th grade. Of course it became less and less as she got older. It will help if you take him to the bathroom when you are getting ready for bed. I have heard advertisements for a medication that helps too, which was not available when my daughter was young.

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