Bedtime Sickness

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LOL! It sounds like you're talking about MY 9 yr old!! Only mine also does it when the word "homework" comes up. He's either suddenly starving to death, or sick somehow.

We have found that turning off all electronics 15-30 mins before bed and reading together in his room makes the transition easier and he doesn't have as many ailments spring up. When there are gripes, I've found that just dismissing the complaint makes it more of a big deal, so we give non-drug choices. He can have an ice pack, a microwaveable heating pad (you can make one by putting rice in a tube sock) or a 2 min massage. The ailment also gets lots of kisses and we pray about it. I usually explain that it's probably his body telling him that he's tired and he will feel better after a good night's sleep. We very rarely have to give medicine because it seems like he really just wants attention and to feel validated.

If it's leg cramps or growing pains, those really do hurt and are common at this age. In those cases, he gets a banana to eat (for the potassium), a heating pad and a massage and then motrin if the pain doesn't subside after rubbing his leg. If he has a stomach ache, he gets the heating pad ... and 9 times out of 10 that works. If he continues to complain, I will give him some yogurt. Maybe once a month, he takes 1 Tums. For headaches he gets an ice pack at the back of his neck & peppermint oil on a cool washcloth on his forehead. Once in awhile, he says it's really bad and the ice didn't help after 30 mins, so then he gets 1 chewable tylenol. Sore throat? Honey. Coughing or Can't Breathe? Vicks Vapor Rub on the feet then put a pair of socks on him. Don't know what to do? go to myhomeremedies.com :)

Good Luck and God Bless!

Well, my four-year-old girl is like that too. The pediatrician said that they're all like that at four, so I imagine some go through it later. He said to look for objective evidence that something's wrong: rash, redness, swelling or (obviously) fever or vomiting. If there isn't any of that, just say, "I'm sorry your leg hurts." (or whatever it is!) and send them to bed.

I will say that I notice she does it more when she's worried about something or when I've been too busy to spend a lot time with her. And maybe your son needs more exercise (playing outside after school or something), so he can sleep easier.

Hope that helps!

Hi,

My 6 year old tries that every so often. You may want to try a mind game. Make up some "medicine" and when he says something hurts, give him some "medicine" saying that will help his hurt. If it tastes not so good, maybe he will get tired of it. But then, he may fight even more. So, maybe it should taste a little sweet. But that would be your call, you know your son. But, just a mind game or take him to the doctor and tell the doctor all about it in front of him. Sometimes the embarrassment at that age can help, too. Just a thought, my oldest son is 17. It is also a phase and it will pass..... just believe that:-)

Roz

Sabela,

What a beautiful name. My 11 year old goes through that a lot. We started offering incentives if she did not get out of bed after we tucked her in. She goes to bed by herself and is a loud to read for a little while, and then we go in and turn her light off and say good night and then she is not suppose to get up. We use rewards like you can pick a treat to go in your lunch box, or instead of cereal you can have a frozen waffle for breakfast. We are not currently having a problem, but it is softball season and she gets home around 8:30, showers and is usually sleeping when we come in to turn her light out. You may want to try getting him involved in a sport. Some more physical activity may halp him be more tired and help him to fall a sleep easier, when you put him to bed. Good Luck!

Hi Sabela,

I notice you say when you tell your son it is time to go to bed and when you tell him to go to bed. Even though he is 9 and becoming self sufficient as far a putting himself to bed, it may be good to reflect back on the bed time ritual you have always had for your son. Even as adults, we need a routine that helps transition us from our day and gets us ready for sleep. When children respond with, "I don't know" sometimes they really don't. Feelings are difficult to articulate. He may need a little help getting himself 'ready' for the idea that he will be going to bed. I used to tell my children how much time they had before it was bed time and I would begin their preferred rituals, (lightsnack, story time drink of water.....etc) If this does not help, I would take him seriously in a neutral way. It is obvious you know there is nothing physically wrong, but by tuning in to his answers about his 'sickness' you may identify the emotional need residing behind it. I hope this helps. MH ____@____.com

He could be playing with you because it sounds like he is full of energy and laying down might not be his thing. Does he have any quiet time throughout the day where he learns to enjoy being by himself? It could be a phase or it could be the mattress, too. Perhaps some stretching exercises before bed can help ease the discomfort if it is sore muscles. Anyway, good luck and be patient.

My son has the same problem. So I made him a rice sock. If you don't know what one is, it is very simple and I will tell you at the end. Anyway, I heat this rice sock up every night when he has a hurt, and it makes him feel better. Sometimes the hurt is real, sometimes it is just for comfort. But the rice sock is warm and fits the bill every time. It is safe because it is not electric and cools on it's own. My son even heats it up now before he goes to bed. Just a short time (30 seconds) so it is not too hot, and to sleep he goes, quickly!

How to make a rice sock: Take a large sock (husband size) without a match, and fill it half way with plain cheap white rice. Tie a knot on the end and then heat in microwave. It heats up easily, so start with a small amount and work your way up. The best part is: It is reuseable until it is too dirty on the outside! I hope this helps.

Sabela,

I used to have the same problem with my daughter (she's now 17) and what I would do is ask her if we needed to take her to the doctor or the hospital. Since most kids don't like the doctor (fear of shots is my guess) she would tell me she was fine. It has worked so far with my 4 year old too. When there is a problem they have always said they want to go. Maybe this will work for you too. good luck.
G.

Do you have a bedtime routine? It sounds like he may just be looking for more time with mom or dad and this is his way of getting it. Perhaps set up a routine if you don't already have one. Read with him each night, or when you put him to bed, take some time to talk about the day before tucking him in... Also, with my kids I tell them that they need to get everything before bed or they don't get it (ie water, bathroom, hugs etc...) Kids will use any excuse to stay up, delay bedtime or get more time with mom and dad. Using a routine and making sure all is done before bedtime comes really helps. Also, with my kids another thing that helps is I tell them 30 min before bed, "you have 30 minutes" at 10 minutes i tell them "time to get your water, go potty, brush your teeth, I'll meet you in your room" Then I go in read with them and say prayers. I tuck them in. The quality time really seems to help as does the 'countdown'... good luck!!!

Maybe he's afraid to go to sleep - nightmares?

Try telling him the story about the boy who cried wolf. Then use that as an avenue to talk to him about making up stories/telling lies and how that can affect him later when he really does need help.

Sounds like anxiety to me. I was the same way. I was always afraid as a child that I would wake up sick in the middle of the night and I was terrified of vomiting. Also, I was scared to go to bed b/c I thought of the next day: what if I get sick at school? Sounds like he needs lots of verbal reassurance. Perhaps sleeping in your room would help? That may sound like a terrible solution, but I'd be willing to try anything. Discuss with him what truly is upsetting him. Tell him you won't think he's weird or rediculous, but you just want to help him. I wish my parents would have done that.