J.G.
I always found reading right before bed made my kids relaxed and sleepy. I still do it and they are 5 and 8. Whatever routine you choose, stick to it every night. Does he really need the milk or is it just a crutch to fall asleep? Perhaps a light snack before bath might help keep his tummy full. Nothing wrong with milk before bed if that's what he likes. Let him drink milk while you read and soon he'll associate reading with relaxing.
Each time you put him to bed and he's still awake, give him a couple of books in the crib. Start with the plastic baby-type, then board books when he's a little older. He'll learn to entertain himself and how to fall asleep.
I always kept the same routine at nap time too, giving books in the crib to entertain and help fall asleep. Also, you could use music, special blankets or stuffed animals to help him feel comforted while awake. Good luck!