Bedtime Routine

Although my 15 month old still sleeps in bed with me I feel that children should be guided not trained, they are not dogs. Besides trying to get on a routine especially with such a young one is going to cause you more stress than if you just let her be. I let my daughter play until she is obviuosly tired then I hold her til she sleeps.

I tried to avoid the cry it out routine, too-but ended up trying it out and now I'm very thankful. But if you're still just looking for other routine activities, and you'd like to read to her but don't only because she won't sit still...I had the same problem at first. But what I do now is give my son a soft book or toy for him to chew on while I read the book. It really helps and after awhile now he actually stops playing and seems to pay attention to my reading. Just a thought-good luck!

I can understand what you're going through since I have a 10-month old baby who also loves to play with the blinds and chew her books. Your friends are right. Try to get a routine down. Infants, like kids, need to have a schedule to help them understand what you want them to do. It isn't always easy to stick with it, but it will make it easier for baby to know when meal time is, bath, and sleep.
Keep at it and also keep in mind that babies at this age have a very, very short attention span. They seem to be more interested in household objects than their own toys. A suggestion for the bath routine would be to wipe baby's face and hands with a warm towel during the "bath" time on days that baby doesn't get a full bath. As for the crib, get baby used to the crib with naps in it during the day. Good luck!

our routine is: a little play after dinner, a few stories, a bath, a quick bedtime massage with bedtime lotion, a small bottle, then bed with his binkie and his puppy dog (lovey), two things he gets only when he sleeps.
falls asleep easily, usually within 2-5 minutes without a peep - he knows the routine, we've been doing it in various forms since birth (he's 15 months).

good luck!

Well I too have a 8 month old. We started our routine at 2 months.. We give a bath 2-3 times a week before the routine starts... When we get home from work we always do the same thing feed dinner, have a bottle, play time.... Bath time.. (Bedtime routine starts here) Change his diaper for bed, put his jammies on, brush teeth, then turn out the lights and for less then 5 minutes we have quiet time... But I always leave the baby awake before I place him in the crib.. Sometimes we read after the diaper... Plus we teach him baby signs for sleep.. He knows it is time for bed when we put the jammies on.. He starts to get mad.. It is really cute!!! He will cry on occasion when we put him down but for less than a couple of minutes... We close the door and it is over.. we don't use a night light...

About me: I am a first time mom of a little boy named Jadon... My husband and I work full time...

Hi H.,

I recommend coming up with some type of a routine to do every night, but you need to find what works for your baby and lifestyle. I have twin girls so we have a very structured routine that we do every night. Dinner, baths, reading/quiet play then in the cribs. We have done this every night for over a year and they now both know what to expect. Occasionally, one or the other is not tired and cries when placed in bed. In that case, I give her a couple of books and leave the lights on a little higher. I leave the room with the door cracked. She either starts looking at books and falls asleep or cries for 5 minutes and then lays down. I think it is the routine of the same thing every night that has helped. Good luck!

Hi H.,

Sometimes the bedtime routine can be as simple as changing your baby into pjs and reading one particular book about going to bed, like Goodnight Moon, or The Big Red Barn. We don't bathe our son every night (he is nine months old), but we do wipe his hands, feet, and face with a warm washcloth, rub lotion on his body, and brush his gums with that little finger toothbrush. (We started the gum brushing to set him up for more positive toothbrushing later.) Then it is on with the pjs and we feed him a bottle and he goes to sleep. Sometimes he is asleep right away and sometimes he will cry for about 10 minutes. It is hard sometimes when he cries, but he seems to sleep much better when he has to put himself to sleep as opposed to giving him assistance (holding him, rocking him,etc.)

Hope this helps!

L. H.

Hi Hilary-
I have a 6 1/2 month old daughter and ever since she was 2-3 months old, we got her accustomed to playing the "Baby Einstein Lullabies" before she naps and goes to sleep. Now she knows when it is time for sleep or a nap, I will put on that CD. Right before her bedtime, I bathe her (once every 2 days), put on her PJ's, sometimes I read her a book, and then breastfeed her. I then brush her little teeth with the little plastic toothbrush for infants.

I put her down awake in her crib and she will soothe herself to sleep. We also have a whitenoise machine we turn on.

She will sleep from 7p-5-5:30am. The CD has been great because she knows the music and knows when it is "night night."

Hopefully this helps....plus we put in her in sleepsack also.

At least you have a routine - very proud of you for that - we gave up once our son started teething - he recently deceided he's going to stay up until 1:00am - it lasted about a week though and we got him back to about 9-10ish so it may just be a short faze. We also heave let him fall asleep in our bed with us, or on the couch or in our arms and then put him in his crib. good luck!

I didn't want to bathe my baby every single night either, because he has very sensitive skin. So, a few nights a week, he gets in the shower with daddy. It at least rinses him off from all the slobber and drool, and it signals "bedtime" to him. It helps him wind down and relax to be in the warm water. It only took a few days, and he actually is rubbing his eyes when I dry him off now. Play some relaxing music only at nap and bedtime (Disney lullaby, or even Christmas music this month.) Giving a mini baby massage with lotion helps too. Try to figure that the things you do like bath and lotion massages might take you a few extra minutes, but it's worth it to have less of a hassle fighting bedtime. I would take the bed/crib away from the blinds too. It just gives him something to do and it's dangerous (the cord to pull the blinds up and down can strangle a baby.) It also might be drafty by the window. Good luck. This is the age when they get a little separation anxiety. Once they know they can stand up and complain, they test their boundaries a lot. Teething plays a big part in their restless sleep too. If your baby won't sit and listen to a story, you can try the new Baby Einstein Lullaby DVD and watch it with him. I do this a few nights a week and my son just melts while he watches it. I relax too. You can also read about the Ferber method, where you just leave the room and check on him every so often, slowing lengthening the time in between checking on him. I have a video camera and monitor ($100 at Toys R Us) so I can see him. I know if he "really" needs me or if he's just fussing. It's the best $100 I spent and I get a lot of piece of mind out of it.

Hi H.,

I was opposed to the "cry it out" method as well until I felt like there were no more options. Up until my son was 11 months old I would respond to every whimper, movement or cry. bedtime was horrible for us. I had to nurse and rock him until he fell asleep and then put him down gently. I was exhausted getting up and down all night long. Our pedi doc told us that we needed to get our son on a schedule and teach him to soothe himself to sleep otherwise he would have issues with this forever. It took a couple of nights and he did cry but then it was like magic. He is 2 1/2 and knows that when its bedtime (7:30) that he goes to sleep. He gets a cup of warm milk after his bath, which is every other night, and he goes right to sleep and sleeps all night long. I know it sounds harsh but it worked for us. You are not damaging your child to let them cry for a few nights. Instead, look at it as teaching them to fall asleep and then get back to sleep if they wake up.

Good luck!

Hi H.
It sounds like she's overtired. What time are you putting her down at night? Is she napping enough during the day? You might want to try putting her down earlier than you have been and see how she reacts. She might actually sit and listen to a story if she's not overtired. I have read several books on the subject but my favorite is "healthy sleep habits, happy child." if you haven't read it, I would check it out!
Hope this helps.
J.

I have a five month old and she is on a bedtime routine. Between 6:45 and 7:00 we take her upstairs and play alittle, then we start a bath for her. She gets a bath, gets lotioned up with a little massage (I use extra virgin coconut oil on her skin, it smells great, you don't have to worry if she gets it on her hands and then in her mouth, its all natural, and a great moisturizer after bath) Then she gets snuggled and fed, rocked for about five minutes and she's out for the night. She expects this routine and if she doesn't get it she has a hard time going to sleep and staying asleep. I'm not sure why you don't want to bathe your baby everynight, but at eight months it's not going to overdry her skin. We use a infant non-soap body wash and only wash her hair every other day. Anyway, the point is, a routine is vital for you baby. They need it for security, everything is super stimulating for babies. A routine helps to slow them down so they can relax and rest, the predictability is essential for babies and children in order to feel safe and calm. I really suggest the bath. Its soothing, its a great bonding time and fun time for everyone (my husband and I bathe her together, I dry her off, he gets her dressed, I feed her, he rocks her and puts her to bed. Its a family event everynight. But mainly, you just need to have a set time line for her so she knows its time to sleep. Keep low lights, low voices, and no playing.

You need a fun routine that calms her down. Turn down music or TV, if the TV is on change the channel to something really boring - no bright colors or action. HGTV works great.
Bath every night is important to prevent MRSA infection. I only wash hair twice a week though.
We make a big deal of shutting the blinds & turning off lights letting baby "help" and we sing a little song before bath time " It's bath time, it's bathtime, the best time of the day!" (from Jo-Jo's Circus) and then after bath we look at picture books in baby's room - this will later become story time. Then we drink our warm milk and rock in the rocker for a while sometimes we sing "Night-Night BAby'
then baby goes to bed drowsy - but still awake so she'll learn to fall asleep.
Does he have a favorite blankie or stuffed animal?
You may end up needing to sleep train - but try helping her transition from day to night activities first.
Good luck!

I didn't want a drawn out routine either...so we tivo'd a short program on baby first channel. (The Junglies) and we would watch that with our son and say "after Junglies, it's time for bed" "in 5 minutes it's time for bed" etc...

now that he's older we read stories before bed...and we still say "in 5 minutes it's time to read stories and then go to bed"

I find that giving a verbal warning, just let's them know what's coming and helps the transitions happen a little smoother...sometimes they protest, but they learn that you mean what you say and having them learn to trust you and your word is one of the most important factors in life. IMHO :)

***

FYI ~ Letting her playing with the blinds can be a fatal mistake...I'd remove her bed from anywhere near the blinds. CPSC knows of 130 strangulation deaths to children since 1991.

Dear H.,

A bath a day is important! It is relaxing to the baby, just like it is for us, and it is an experience that she will enjoy and you will too, seeing her play with the warm water and water toys. A good time to have together.

Umhuh, that is right. She is probably too young to enjoy books. I don't know all babies are individuals and you have to study your child to see what they respond positively to.

C. N.

What first came to mind was the new smell of the crib vs. the travel crib she's used to. Does she have a "lovey?" I'm not sure if you've heard of sleep regression but eight months is supposed to be the most challenging. Look up sleep regression on moxie.com. Her awareness is probably at an all time high and she may be really getting into playing. My daughter is not 11 months but at 8 months we had to play around with her bed time, cut out doing baths because they just keyed her up, and started reading (whispering), singing (very softly) and the no-no, rocking. Its worked for us but these little buggers are all so different, hard to say what will work for your little one: ) Much luck to you!
Jen

Maybe try some soft bed time music, Raffi is what our son prefers. Once she is old enough, maybe let her color, this is also very soothing to children before bed. We also put on a fan for some white noise, you might want to try that. ;0)