Bedtime Help! - Spanish Fork,UT

Updated on April 09, 2010
M.P. asks from Spanish Fork, UT
10 answers

I am in need of some great advice! My DD (2 yrs) is having a really rough time with her sleeping schedule. She doesn't usually take naps (much to my dismay!) but desperately needs them! I know that she needs a certain amount of sleep, and she's not getting it no matter which route we go. When she doesn't take a nap she gets super grouchy in the evenings and falls right to sleep at bedtime. When she does take a nap it is usually about 2 hours long, but then she doesn't fall asleep until 10-11 and then is really grumpy the next morning.
Does anybody have advice on what I can do to help her get the sleep that she needs and the "mommy" time that I need?

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E.F.

answers from Casper on

M.,
My kids have done this too, What I have ended up doing is giving an early a nap as they will take and wake them after 45-60 min. I will say, it is hard to wake them, but if I do not they will stay awake until 10-11. So I shoot for like 2:30-3:00 nap and get them up at 4:00 or before. I try to have something fun to help wake them up, like some place to go or a fun snack or activity. This helps a lot. but there are days that I repeatedly have to wake them and wake them and wake them. After about the 2nd time I will just bring them out to the couch and "life" keeps them awake pretty well.
Good luck finding something that works:)
E.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Turn nap time to "quiet time". Even if she lays on the sofa and watches a 60 min movie, she will get a little rest.
Also, the days she does not nap at all--put her to bed at least an hour earlier. If she naps never let her sleep past 3:30 in the afternoon and keep bedtime set at about 7:30ish. Good luck!
Remember sleep begets sleep--an over tired child will sleep less hours at night!

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J.N.

answers from Salt Lake City on

What time does she take her nap? Maybe move it back an hour or 2, so she is ready to sleep at bedtime. You'll need to do this gradually, though, for it to work. 15 min earlier this week, then another 15 next, etc.

Many 2 year olds have a hard time napping. I made the mistake with my kids to think that they had "grown out of it" (which did make bedtime harder, they were grumpy all evening and overtired). When we had to put my third in daycare, they had a set naptime - same time each day - and apparently it was a state regulation that all kids under 5 who were in day care more that 4 hours needed a nap time. Anyway, kids who didn't nap were still expected to lie quietly and "rest their bodies" - and my son started napping again! He was also much happier in the evenings. Basically, two year olds are so busy discovering and playing and thinking (their brain is growing in leaps and bounds) that they don't want to stop and they have a harder time settling down. Make nap time a "quiet time" where she lies down with the lights off. Let her play quietly with a toy or look at a book. She might fall asleep after a while, she might not (after an hour of quiet time, if she's not asleep, I would let it end. The rest will still do her some good).

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M.M.

answers from Dallas on

She does not 'need' a 2 hour nap. Two short naps or one nap about 1-1 1/2 hours - early afternoon - should be sufficient. Quiet time with white noise in the background, in the afternoon, in a dark room would be good too. If she is grouchy in the PM w/ no nap, have her go to bed earlier before she gets grouchy or right on the onset. We can't 'control' our children, we guide them, sometimes at our own sacrifice (such as no sleep or 'me' time). They aren't robots, they are just like us but smaller. They have issues going to sleep just like we do and it isn't always the same thing that works day after day.

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G.B.

answers from Boise on

Let the child nap but you must wake her before she gets into deep sleep.
A 20-30 minute nap should refresh her.

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H.S.

answers from Salt Lake City on

M. - I was having sleep issues with my son and asked a question about it on Mamapedia. One of the responses recommended a woman named Dana Obleman - she is a sleep expert. Her website is www.sleepsense.net. She has you fill out a questionnaire about your child's sleep habits and then will respond with some ideas. If you need some more help you can buy her program, but the ideas she gave me were so helpful! It wouldn't hurt to give this a try - it was a lifesaver for me. Good luck!

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M.S.

answers from Boise on

what is your bedtime routine? The 2 hour nap is good, in fact when my twins go to school they are required to lay down for 2 hours and usually go to sleep. (they are 3).
This is my routine, which has helped them to stay in their beds and eventually fall asleep.
After supper it is wind down time. They either are in a bath or having quiet play for about 1/2 hour.

Then I tell them to get their jammies on and pick out a book. Then they brush their teeth.

After that I read each one their story and tell them to go to bed. I allow them to take their books to bed with them to look at. They give me a big hug, say "I love you" and "good night" and go climb in their beds. After a 1/2 hour to hour I go and get them all covered up and move their books back to their bookshelves because they have fallen asleep.

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C.C.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Sleep training can be a tough one. I recomend a book that really helped me. "Good Night Sleep Tight", by the sleep lady. She gives a lot of great advice on helping children sleep from new born to 5 years old. One thing that has been really helpful that I have done is in the evening around 6:00pm I turn off lights, and shut blinds so it's dimmer in the house lower lighting triggers the body's natural melatonin to kick in. A predictable routine is very helpful as well. Kids need some time to transition to sleep mode. When it's time to go get ready for bed for my kids usually about 7:00pm we start the routine we have a routine of brush teeth, get in jammies and diapers,(sometimes some play time in the room before we continue based on how much energy they have) pray together, read a scripture together, then read other stories, talk a bit, sing a bit, then good night hugs and kisses. It's not always the same, but if you can keep whatever you want in your routine in the same order that triggers there brain that it's sleep time.
It can also help for dinner to be at least an hour before bedtime, I have fed my kids right before bed before and they take an extra long time to burn the fuel I just gave them. If she is used to going to bed late you can bring the bedtime earlier in 15 minute increments each day until it's were you want it.
You can have a little morning routine as well. Greet the new day with a happy face pull open the blinds and say GOOD MORNING, give a big hug and kiss. Hope this helps you both.

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S.M.

answers from Casper on

Motion, massage, lay down with her. My hubby likes to fill the kids up with pretzels and water sometimes if it's taking longer. If she wakes up grumpy, have her go back to bed. My son woke up early this morning (also 2), whiny and crying so I got him some water, then lay down and ignored him until he gave up and lay down also. When he woke up 2 hours laters things were much better. It's okay if every day has a different schedule to me, as long as he gets enough rest.

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D.W.

answers from Gainesville on

When she won't nap you need to tell her it's quiet time. Tell her she doesn't have to sleep but she has to stay in bed and she has to be quiet. 9/10 my son would pass right out.

You have to take control of the situation. You are letting her control it right now-when she naps, when she doesn't, when she goes to bed, etc.

Obviously she still needs naps and she is caught in a cycle and she is over-tired.

When she starts getting tired/showing first signs of tired, that's the time for nap/quiet time not when she is falling down tired. There is nothing wrong with a 2 hour nap but it has to be in the early afternoon not late into the day which I suspect is happening for her not to go to bed so late. She shouldn't be napping past 4:30 or so. She's 2 she needs more than 20-30 minutes sleep. Cat naps might work for adults but kids need deeper rest. Then you need a strong night routine-dinner, bath, books, bed-or whatever works for her but it has to be the same and at roughly the same time every night. She should be in bed no later than 7:30 or 8.

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