Bedtime - Hope Mills,NC

HI J.,FIRST LET ME TELL YOU THAT I ALWAYS TYPE IN ALL CAPS.I HAVE A NERVE CONDITION AND IT'S JUST EASIER.WITH THAT SAID,ALL YOU HAVE TO BE FIRM.I HAD THE SAME PROBLEM.WHEN I HAD MY SECOND AND LAST CHILD,I CAME TO THE REALIZATION THAT THIS WAS MY LAST CHILD SO I WAS VERY SLACK AS FAR AS "FOR THE LACK OF A BETTER WORD DISCIPINE." I DIDN'T WANT TO MAKE HER GO TO BED,LIKE I DID MY OLDER CHILD.WELL, I TALKED TO MY PEDIATRICIAN.AND SHE TOLD ME TO MAKE HER GO TO HER BED AND DO NOT GIVE IN.IF SHE STARTS TO CRY.THEN LET HER CRY AND DO NOT GO CHECK ON HER UNTIL 1 HOUR PASSED AND IF SHE GOT UP TAKE HER STRAIGHT BACK TO BED.AND KEEP THIS UP ALL NIGHT EVERY NIGHT UNTIL SHE FINALLY GIVES IN. AND SHE FINALLY GAVE IN BUT I'LL WORN YOU I WAS ONE TIRED LITTLE MOMMY BY THE TIME SHE GAVE IT UP BUT YOU KNOW THEY TELL YOU TO PICK YOUR BATTLES.WELL, TRUST ME WHEN I SAY TO YOU THAT THIS IS DEFINATELY ONE THAT YOU WANT TO FIGHT.I HAVE A GOOD FRIENDS WHO'S TWO BOYS SLEPT IN HER BED AND THEN IN HER ROOM UNTIL AGES 14 AND 16 AND IT REALLY CAUSED MAJOR PROBLEMS IN HER MARRIAGE!I WOULD ALSO SUGGEST THAT YOU HAVE LOTS OF COFFEE OR SODA ON HAND TO START THIS BATTLE!AND DON'T GIVE IN NOT EVEN ONCE MY PEDITRICIAN SAID THAT ONCE YOU DO YOU MUST START FROM THE BEGINING!GOOD LUCK!SINCERELY,T.

My 2 1/2 YO has the same problem... I keep hoping its a phase. :) We've tried everything as well... Some nights are better than others in that occasionally I can get her to got to bed without me. But she ALWAYS comes into our bed at around 1am unless she's sick or if we had a VERY busy day. She does better at starting into the evening routine if I set the timer for when bedtime starts... but I think its a phase. I'll let you know if it ever actually ends... :)

Read the No Cry Sleep Solution; it has a section specifically for Toddlers. I used it w/ my 1 year old, and he goes right to bed happily and soothes himself to sleep! It does NOT use the Cry It Out method... so I preferred it for my home! Just a suggestion.

Good Luck!

I would suggest reading Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. I recommend it to everyone I know! It addresses sleeping issues with children of all ages. Good luck!

I have the same problem with my oldest daughter who is 3. She has to be in the same room as my husband and I to go to sleep. She usually falls asleep lying on my Boppy pillow in my lap, on the couch beside me or her dad or on a pallet in the floor. The only way she will go to sleep in her bed is if one of us lies down with her. She cries if you put her in her bed by herself. I am hoping she will outgrow this eventually.

As far as climbing into your bed at night, we had this problem also after we moved last year. I would pick her back up and put her in her bed. I would see if she needed something...water, medicine if she was hurting, etc. If there was nothing she needed, I laid her back down in her bed and covered her back up. If she asked me to lay down with her, I would tell her that I had to go back to my bed, but I would leave her door open or cracked. The 1st week or so I would have to put her back in her bed 2 or 3 times before she finally fell asleep or just gave up and quit getting up. It finally stopped all together. Now she only gets me up if she needs to potty, something scared her (rain or thunder) or she wants something to drink. Now once I lay her back down she snuggles back in and usually has her eyes closed and back off to lala land before I get to her bedroom door. Good luck.

I hate to say it but you might just have to let her cry herself to sleep. Don't go in to comfort her at all. Just ignore her crying as much as possible. I know it sounds harsh but my daughter is the same way. She has never liked sleeping. Even at a year old she was still doing the newborn thing - waking up every two hours - if she wasn't sleeping with me. I was exhausted. My pediatrician told me to let her cry herself to sleep. It was horrible for the first three or four nights. She cried for about an hour each night. Finally she started putting herself to sleep. She is 2 1/2 now and she goes to bed on her own (most nights). We have a hard time still if we let her sleep with us. The next couple of nights are a battle. So we have just had to cut it out completely.

I know it will be hard but if you set a firm routine such as quiet play, bath, snack, book, bedtime (or whatever you prefer and works for you) and do it for at least 3 nights with no deviation your daughter will learn the routine. It may take a few more nights depending on how stubborn she is. Also if she comes into your bed at night you could calm her and take her back to her room. You may have some sleepless nights but it will work if you do the same thing every time she comes into your room. I hope this helps and good luck!