Bed Wetting - Goodland, KS

That's a hard situation to deal with. I have a nephew who is 14 and just this year quit wetting the bed. My advice is patience, don't punish and praise when he doesn't wet. You could try to wake him up everynight around 12 am but it doesn't always work. It probably bothers him more then it does you. Good luck to you both.

Hi M.,
My son wet the bed until he was 7 and my brother until he was close to 10. My brother, granted this was 30 years ago, was told he had a small bladder, my Dr. said with my son, who would be fine for a few weeks or months and then have problems again for 2 or 3 weeks, was growing and that the nerves and muscles don't grow at the same rate, the nerves get stretched and don't work as well until they have caught up to the muscles. they make pull ups for older kids and when this problem starts we use the pullups. I told him the medical reason for it and that helped with his self esteem, he was very hard on himself about it until he heard what the Dr. said.
Good luck,
SarahMM

my daughter wet her bed until she was about seven and i think it is just because she grew into her bladder. i know that i have had brothers that have wet their bed until about age ten. so i think sometimes it is just something that eventually some outgrow. but i do daycare and i had a little girl that was four and she had been potty trained for awhile but she continued to pee her pants all the time. well come to find out she ended up having juevinille diabetes. i guess that frequent urination is a symptom of that. other then just sharing those with you, i really dont have anymore suggestions. so maybe you should take him and just get him checked out and let the doctors know your concerns, so that he could rule out any medical issues that could be related and go from there.

I agree that you need to talk to your child's pediatrition about any medical concerns that might be causing his night time wetting (constipation, bladder infection, diabeaties, are just a few). I am a huge proponent for being an unwavering advocate for your child...if your doctor gives you the line that this is "normal" demand he run tests or find a new doctor (I am not saying this is not "normal" but you need to know there are no underlying causes).

I do know that many children, especially boys because they seem to sleep deeper, do not stop night time wetting until 11 or 12. That being said you could very well be at the tail end of this. I have 2 younger brothers and one wet until he was 8 and the other 11...I remember my mother trying everything from special underware that shocked them if they wet (this doesn't work because they have to start going before it will work...once a child starts going generally they can't stop...so they feel bad for wetting and they get a shock!), to offering them bribes for not wetting. I know that it was very traumatic for them...my grandparents would have me to spend the night but my brothers were not allowed to stay, they couldn't go to sleep overs, ect. Now a days they have better diaper type products on the market to help a child make it thru the night without getting the bed wet (but they still may urinate). One suggestion I do have is I know you are likely familiar with plastic sheets...what my mom used to do is make the bed like this....plastic sheet, regular sheet (b/c who wants to sleep on a plastic sheet)...plastic sheet, regular sheet (basically making the bed twice). This way when my brother wet the bed she could just strip off the offending sheets and have a new set already on...it cut down on the whole remaking the bed part of the process.

I do not believe in punishment for something a child cannot control...this would include forcing them to remake their bed after the incident...physical punishment for wetting, or a verbal lashing. These just exasperate the problem and if it is related to a medical problem once the medical problem is resolved they may still wet as a result of the stress caused. It is important to make sure your child does not feel like it is his "fault" this is happening...

Good luck with this, I know it is really hard, I am 30 and I still remember the tears and drama every night with my brothers...it was a traumatic time for the entire family.

God Bless!

I have a son that is almost 15 and still occasionally wets the bed. I asked his Doctor about it and he said to get him up before I went to bed at night and have him use the bathroom then send him back to bed. I then get him up when I get up to get ready for work and have him go again before I leave for work during the summer. If it is during the school year then I have him get up before me so that if he did have an accident he can jump in a shower before me and get ready for school. We also stop all drinks at 7:30 pm. This seems to help. He has more problem if we have a late night or a very active day where he gets really tired and sleeps really hard.

They make GoodNights that look like shorts now (they didn't make them like the shorts when we used them) and they were a life saver.

it could be medical, or psychological...talk to your pediatrician to rule out any medical concerns. However--I wet the bed until I was 10. I had actually stopped at age 6...my mom did a calendar for me, at the end of each week I got a small toy/treat. once I had gone a month I got a special toy--it was a doll. I didn't wet the bed anymore, then we moved over the summer and I left my doll behind on accident--I started to wet the bed again and nothing my mom did or said helped. One night I woke up in my urine and I thought, I am done with this. and it was the last night I wet the bed. For me I know it was psychological. I come from a large family and even negative attention was better than no attention. I also sucked my thumb until I was 7. I'm a healthy adult now. lol. but I think with the thumb, the bigger deal my parents made about it the more I did it. Wetting the bed feels really shameful as a kid. I remember kids in school making fun of a boy for bed wetting because he smelt like pee. I wet the bed...but I bathed each morning so no one knew. I was embarrassed about it-- I don't know if I had a small bladder, or another reason for wetting but I hope if my dd wets the bed I make sure to not have it be something she feels shame about, that I can talk about it in a way that helps her to understand it doesn't lessen who she is as a person. So my advice would be to get a pediatricians take on it and ask your son to help you come up with a plan, some kind of reward system? but if he loses the reward/toy and starts wetting again...maybe buy him a new one. lol.

Night time urine concentration is controlled by a hormone. Of you don't have enough, Your bladder becomes over full and in the unawarenees of sleep you may pee. Most people outgrow this by adulthood. My understanding is that is an inheirited condition and usually resolves by adulthood. There are drugs but if you read up on them you will find they are effective about 40% of the time and do have some negative side affects. Probably not worth the rick for a less than 50/50 chance they will help. Some people have had good results with homeopathic treatment. In any case talk with your doctor, do your homework and above all be patient and understanding. This is not something your child has control over.

M.,

I was at a specialty doc for sleep apnea last month for my 3 yr old daughter. He was saying that if a child has sleep apnea their diaphram expands while they breathe (improperly) and then the pressure MAKES them wet the bed. This is only one symptom of sleep apnea. You may want to talk to your dr about having a sleep apnea test done especially if he snores. He doesn't even have to wake up( like my daughter) to have sleep apnea and the problem can be fixed in easy ways. Good luck.

A.

My little brother wet the bed until he was 11. But it wasn't sporadic; once he stopped, he stopped. I know sometimes he just needs to grow out of it. But it could also be he needs to be woken up after a few hours of sleep. My brother was always, and still is, an incredibly deep sleeper. Trying to wake him is like trying to wake the dead. So, his body wouldn't rouse when he got the urge. You might try waking him after a few hours of sleeping and have him go potty. Then send him back to bed. This should also help keep him from sleeping too deeply.

Take him to the doctor. Frequently bed wetting can be a symptom of a physical disorder like a urinary tract infection. It can also be due to stress. My daughter has a long history of bladder infections and when she has an infection she frequently wets the bed because she loses some bladder control.

Hi!
I'm sure by now you are seeing through others' responses that this is really not that uncommon of a problem. When my son went through it for a while, I learned that it is more common among boys, and there can be genetic tendencies. (I think people just didn't talk about it in the past as much.) But I wanted to tell you that when my son was in 4th grade and his class went on an overnight fieldtrip to sleep at the museum,I learned that one of the male teachers had been asked to waken nearly a third of all the boys in the night (kept secret from the other classmates, of course) so they could use the facilities and avoid accidents. That's a lot of kids!
Take heart, this too will likely pass!

Hate to be the bearer of bad news but it's a cronic problem that won't go away until he hits puberty. My brothers had the same problem. There is a medication you can get from your doctor for vacations and sleepovers but it's not very good for you so they strongly recomend that you don't use it much. Anyway... just ask your doctor when your there they might have more solutions for you

You might call Children's Hospital, because I think that they have a program that deals with this issue. I'm not saying that your son's situation is that serious. I'm saying that you can go straight to the experts and see what they advise, rather than us moms just guessing.

My niece was involved with that program, but her situation was far more serious -- praise God that you don't have to deal with that.

M., I have a son who wet the bed until he turned 13. I was told by a friend that worked for a chiropractor that my son could benefit from some adjustments. I took him in, and after the 2nd adjustment, he woke up dry every single night! I know that after 13 years wetting every single night, it was not by chance. I feel that his anger in life was because he could not control that one area in his life until he got it fixed. My son is 19 now, and having a much better life.

It could be a lot of different reasons for the bed wetting. I myself have a 9 year old that still wets the bed. It could be genetic, or it could be that they haven't developed the control yet that sometimes takes awhile. But it is a very common thing. I know lots of parents that their older boys wet the bed still. My brother did and he eventually grew out of it. And I am hoping that my son will too. I don't want to tramatize him with doctors and proceduers that I have heard of. I am going to wait and see.

It would probably be a good idea to get him into the doctor...I had some issues as a child with this because my bladder was just really small (still is) so I just had to learn to wake up in the night if I needed to go. I have some nieces that had the same issue and waking up at night was nearly impossible because they sleep so deeply. My sister's doctor gave her a recommendation for an alarm that you hook to their underwear that helps them wake up at night. She only had to use it for a week and they were accident free. Either way, if it's medical or just learning to wake up at night, it's a good idea to talk to the doctor.

Taking honey at night can help his body absorb the water so he can make it through the night. One of my kids had that until about that age. For some it is actually a physical inability to feel the urge and wake up.

K. Loidolt
Author, Shopper's Guide to Healthy Living

I understand your concern as i had the same problem with my oldest daughter. I asked our doctor about this & he told me that it was nothing to be concerned about, that sometimes their bladder doesn't grow as fast as the rest of their body & to give it time. If you know this may be a problem, have your son wear pull-ups to bed & cover his bed with a plastic mattress cover. The worst thing you can do is show too much concern & make him feel self-conscious or embarrassed about it. The problem will usually take care of itself with time. Good luck.

Our youngest son (9) has been dealing with bed time accidents since he was potty trained at 2/3 years old. It can be difficult, there are times when he does not have a problem for weeks and then all of a sudden it is nightly for weeks. Personally I think it has to do with growth spurts. And I also believe he has a very small bladder. I have to get up at night to go too. My husband teases me about having little bladder syndrome because every where we go I have to find a bathroom. I have no health issues, just a small bladder, so I can't be upset that I passed it down to my child!

We do all the standard things recommended: no big drinks for at least an hour or so before bed, go potty several times before going to sleep, waking him up at night, (I am not a great sleeper anyway) but we also realized with getting him up, that it has to be between 2:00 a.m. and 3:00 a.m or he still has an accident, regardles of what time he goes to bed or gets out of bed! He uses night time pants to cut down on the laundry, (but he is a big kid and they are getting too small on him!). We talk about listening to his body and responding but it has never made a difference.

We try to be supportive and not make a big deal out of any of it but he is still quite sensitive. We have to tell him we are not upset with him. It is very important for you and he to both know it is not an issue of his control. This is not an issue to be embarrassed about, (you or your child) it is simply one of those things that some kids deal with, and probably more than you would think!!

When we questioned our family doc a few years ago, after he checked out health wise, and absolutely do make sure that it is not a health issue! If this is not something that has been a previous problem, sudden night time accidents can be the first sign of childhood diabetes or uti's! But also, please be careful about tests that they may want to perform on small children with these issues, we had a friend who's son had all kinds of tests that were very invasive and it ended up being just plain old night time accidents! Anyway, I was relieved but also a little surprized, when she told us not to be concerned. She said it is VERY common especially when there is a family history. I had a brother who dealt with it and his father also dealt with it. She told us that most kids grow out of it on thier own by age 10-11.

But that being said the older he gets the more it becomes a problem for him, he wants to go spend nights at friends houses but doesn't, do to the fear of having an accident.

We have an appointment with a new family doc (we moved here last year) next month to discuss options. Medication have been suggested and I have looked into the alarms but they are about $100.00.

I guess I haven't really given you any advice, just know you are not alone. And neither is your son!! By the way, at least two of my sons friends who have come over and spent the night here, (accidently heard his night time pants rustle) and informed him, "don't be embarrassed, I had the same problem!" Although many kids can be cruel, some kids like these boys not only weren't cruel but were kind enough to share thier own struggles with it!

Good Morning M.!!

I am C. and I have two bedwetters. My bedwetters are 13 and 11 and they are starting to do alot better. I have done everything under the sun. The only thing to do is allow your 10 uear old to just outgrow it. What I have done, is to not make a big deal out of it. When my child wets the bed, I just have them hop in the shower to at least wash their body so they don't stink while at school and wash their bedding as soon as time will allow.

Children can be real mean and if a child wets the bed, some kids can tell just by the oder of it. The mean kids will tease and make fun. That is why I have always had my children shower before school if they have had an accident the night before.

I do hope this helps any. I hope I have not made you angry or upset or frustrated. It use to frustrate me to no end and my frustration on made the bedwetting worse. So, my advice is try real hard to not make a big deal out of it. It is hard to do that.

If you have any questions, my nimber is ###-###-####. Feel free to call any time.

Sincerly,
C. Taylor, stay at home mom of 4 children.

Bed wetting at this age is most likely due to a medical problem, I would have your child's Dr. reffer you to a urologist to find out what is wrong, it may jsut be an immature bladder or it may be something else, it's best to try to find out for sure so that he can get the treatment he needs. Make sure not to shame him and make him feel embarassed, that will not help anything. Good luck to you and your son!

I have a 9 yr old boy that wets the bed when he's on a growth spurt. I usually wake him up before I go to bed and that helps. My brothers all did the same thing. There could be a number of problems so it's best to talk to your doctor about it. But, like some of the other replies, I've been told it's usually an infection or their bladder doesn't always grow as fast as the rest of the body. It's more important that you don't make him feel guilty about it. He's not choosing to wet the bed on purpose. I think they grow out of it, but check with your DR first - just to make sure there aren't any physical problems. Good Luck!

ps- invest in a good carpet cleaner vacuum with a hose for his mattress and use cleaner with lavender in it!!!

I have a daughter who wets the bed. I have looked it up on the internet & came across a medical condition called Enuresis. You may want to look it up, it could be of some help, I guess every child is different.

M.
My daughter is 12 and still wetting the bed. I took her into the doctor a few months ago and he said she was fine. No sign of illness. One thing we found out later is that she got UTI's because she tries so hard to hold it for long periods of time. She doesn't like to use the bathroom. She also claims she's lazy so she would rather wet her bed at night than get up and use the bathroom, but she is also stubborn and I can't get her to change her ways. For me it's embarassing to see this still happening, but I'm not sure what the right answer is. Right now my daughter wears adult pull-ups and has a plastic protector on her bed. I jope she stops soon. For me this is very taxing. Good luck with your son P.

Our doctor told use we could buy an alarm that will wake him up to go. It goes off when it gets even a little wet. I was told it will wake up the house so it should wake him up even if he is a heavy sleeper. We were going to get one but had to wait until we had the money for it and by then, he stopped. He does still have accidents but he has a shower before he goes to school and has to wash his sheets because no one else wants to touch them.

Have you taken him to the doctor? My sister had a similar problem and it ended up being a valve in her bladder that needed replacing. It could be something like that.