Bed Sides

Updated on June 10, 2009
L.M. asks from Santa Cruz, CA
5 answers

Our daughter will only fall asleep for a nap in our bed (although she sleeps fine at night in her crib). I'd like to find a way to safely leave her in our bed while she sleeps. Does anyone know of any bed rails (is this the right term for it?) that are long enough that she can't crawl off the bed? She can also pull herself up to standing so there may simply be no safe alternative, but I thought I'd ask...

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N.P.

answers from Modesto on

Hi Lilia,

I started with pillows surrounding my bed, but eventually "THUNK".....yep, my sweet, sleeping son fell off my King Size bed.....then it was time to think of something else.

I purchase one of those railings that simply slip in between my matresses', then fold down. I actually purchased 2 of them, but only one was necessary because my son always rolled to the same side :O)

This was a GREAT purchase, because what I didn't know was that I would later travel with it to my sister's, or wherever, and use it in place of a portable crib. It worked on ANY bed wherever we went, and I used it for years!

Anyway, that's what worked for me :O)

~N. :O)

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R.C.

answers from Sacramento on

I've just put pillows all around my kids when they sleep in my bed and start teaching them how to slide off the bed feet first on their tummy (as long as the bed isn't too high and they can walk) They actually learn how to get down safely themselves pretty quickly. You could make a little bed on the floor until she learns how to get down safely. I have found that I waste a lot of money buying gear that may not work very well and they outgrow the need for it pretty quickly. Also, if she can stand up she may be able to pull herself over the railing which would be an even farther fall.

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K.H.

answers from Fresno on

It depends on what size bed you have. I have only seen one rail long enough for a queen bed. I haven't seen anything for king beds. www.securebaby.com has a selection of bed rails and www.onestepahead.com has a couple different rails. We have the extra long bed rail from one step ahead. We got ours 4 years ago, so it doesn't have the hide away option that their new one has. We have it on our duaghters twin bed. It does not go the full length of the bed. The second night it was on her bed, she was asleep and rolled off the foot of her bed. So, I don't think there are any rails that would prevent her from crawling or rolling off the bed. If she is pulling herself up to stand, bed rails are not going to be tall enough. And the rails would be tempting to pull herself up on. I would rather have my daughter crawl and fall, than stand and fall out of bed. I think she is old enough to start learning how to slide out of bed feet first on her tummy like another mama mentioned already. We taught our girls how to get out of our bed that way at around 10 months. They learn quickly. Once I showed them how a few times, I would let them do most of the work and would put my hand on their bottom for support. I gradually gave less support with my hand until they were doing it on their own. Even if she is physically able to do it, it can be a little scary. My oldest daughter was no fear, but my youngest daughter needed encouragment and took longer to gain the confidence to do it. We have a pillow top mattress so it is a high bed. Pillows are probably your safest bet right now when she is in your bed.
Enjoy your little blessing, they grow up to fast. K.

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D.J.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi Lilia,

While bed rail/guards are a good thing to have for a toddler, they are not meant for use with an infant - or any child that cannot get in and out of the bed by themselves.

Also of MOST IMPORTANCE - the space between the mattress and the guard often has a small gap - a baby could EASILY get stuck and die.

I have bed guards on my bed, and use them ONLY when I am in the bed with my son. I also put a pillow between him and the guard. The guard for me is to make sure he doesn't crawl over the pillow and fall off the bed. I NEVER leave him alone in my bed - NEVER.

HERE IS WHAT WORKED FOR ME:

I was able to transition him from the bed to his crib - I keep his crib in my room for now. I started him for his nap in the bed with me. Once asleep I put him in his crib. At first when he woke he would cry because the surroundings were different from when he fell asleep. However after a few days he was OK waking in his crib and simply played for a few minutes after waking and letting me know he was up.

I hope this helps. Remember - the manufactures of these crib rails/guards say they are NOT for babies.

Best of luck,
D.

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A.M.

answers from San Francisco on

hi lilia...
my daughter was/is the same, if i'm lucky enough to get her to nap nowadays, i found the simplest, cheapest failsafe way (in my experience), is her in the middle of the bed, surrounded by a nest of pillows. this is what i always did, and though she is now three, still do, without incedent, making sure her movements were within earshot(via moniter, if i'm busy with the dishes,laundry, or other task which may comprimise my hearing - or simply, through an open door if i'm relaxing or seeing to a quieter chore, bills, dusting, etc., by the time she is physically capable to successfully manuver from out of the nest without stirring up those "no longer sleeping, and something may be amiss sounds", she'll have learned how to slide herself down off your bed, or know that she can't get down without falling, in which case she will scream or somehow signal for help, fully aware of what may happen if she tries on her own and fails, her fear will keep her from crawling off, but not from attempting new ways to dismount eventually, whch she would have come accross without napping in your bed. other than barring her from your room and bed until shes like 2 1/2 or 3, and has mastered climbing up the playground slide, and coming down the ladder, so you're sure she can safley get on and off your bed, you've just gotta let some things happen knees are gonna get scuffed, face plants while running are bound to occur complete with your uncontrolable urge to vomit, she'll fall off her bike, probably even break a bone or two, i know, sick to your stomach right...but be thankful, very rarely do these milestones in the physical injury realm ever mame or cripple our kids; blood, tears (theirs and ours), consoling and pretty quick, it's healed...all better! the real boo boos, those horrible scaring boo boos, never come from a mommies bed and a childs subsequent tempting fate senario, and these are the booboos we spend our parenthood fearing, so much time spent over what if not for the small scar on her chin, in twenty years we would have no memory of. the real pain, the stuff that breaks a little girls spirit, and as parents their is no band aid made for, are those things we have no control over, there is no failsafe, or quick fix, and no amount of preparation will ever suffic in making any of these real booboos less likly to occur or quicker and easier to heal, and these booboos are what we as parents spend most of our time tending to; soothing, supporting, and streangthening, a childs soul, is our first priority, and in twenty years you'll remember the name of the little girl who told your daughter "you can't play with us, we don't like you", the exact time she burst through the front door in tears beacause all the boys at school were teasing her, the very date she didn't make the dance team and what intersection you were stopped at for a red light when the most inconsolable sobbing erupted from the backseat, how she hung up her cell phone pressed it two her forhead slowly flopped her body down burying her face in the seat next to her, turned her head slowly toward youj her eyes desparetly searching yours and her beautiful sad face as she wailed "mommy...derek broke up with me, why doesn't he like me anymore, what's wrong with me, he hates me, mom, why?" what first aid kit comes equipt to triage a broken heart, fall from bed? sure, lists of proven treatments, pain alieviation, infection protection, and more!!! worry less, live more, and one day when you've got nothing really important going, find out where derek works and somehow get him fired.

while she's napping or nesting whatever the case may be grow a child strong of soul and spirit, who can take a hit without its return, who can fall gracefully without fear of falling again, can love without stipulation, hate without diminishment, forgive without forgetting, laugh without reservation, learn without too many mistakes, and live without regret, never would we say...without falling off the bed. right?

good luck finding what works best for the both of you, whatever it may be and cherish those naps, for the taking of them will one day come to an end, your days of a guiltless two hour respite will not last forever.

enjoy eachother,
aline

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