Battling W/6 Yr Old on Keeping Room clean...fun Ways to "Fix" This?

I like some of the ideas here for easy storage places, and games to play while picking up. I think the expectation that a six year-old will keep his room clean is a little much. I would clean the room with his help.

Have you tried taking the toys away for awhile as a punishment for not listening? When I tell my daughter to clean her room, and she doesnt listen, I give her one last warning that I will be in with a trash bag to clean it myself. Always does the trick!

Um, I think the "clear the room" idea is a good one.

I just recently went through this with my 14 year old - yep, old enough to clean his room but flat out refused to do it. So, I gave him a time limit - room had to be clean by Sunday at 5pm. I told him if it was not, then I was going to go in and box up everything in it, except his clothing. I even threatened to take his furniture, as he has the only new, matching, bedroom set in the house (that I bought for him when we moved in).

He cleaned his room. Oh, grudgingly and with much complaining, but he even moved furniture around to sweep behind it. I thought he has been body snatched!!! LOL

I solved some of his storage problems by purchasing flat, plastic storage boxes that fit under the bed. That way he can slide them out, use the contents, then slide it back under.

I gave up on worrying if the clothing was just shoved into drawers - he is old enough to do it right or make the decision to be wrinkled at school.

Sometimes they just get too much stuff in their rooms and get overwhelmed. Limiting the amount of toys in their rooms helps them keep it clean - especially with younger children.

Good Luck and God Bless

"My only idea at this point is to "clear the room" of any extras so there's less to keep clean. Obviously my child doesn't like this idea AT ALL since all the fav toys will either be put in the basement or just inaccessible."

Tell him if he's not able to put away his toys after he uses them, then he's obviously not old enough to have them.

As for the shirts, hang them up or pack away most of them. Give him two-weeks' worth in his drawer.

FWIW, I think a little mess in a room is okay. It is "their" space, after all.

Our 5 yo twins have a lot of pet shop stuff and a bunch of Beanie babies. Sometimes I can't see the floor with all the toys everywhere. I want their room cleaned up before they go to bed and sometimes I don't have time to play games. I just want it done. I set the timer and tell them if they don't have it picked up when the timer goes off, anything left on the floor goes in my trash bag to be donated. I donate other stuff often so they know where the toys will go. We haven't needed the trash bag yet. They have made it a race to beat the timer and they are always excited when they do. We have labeled containers for stuff and they helped make the labels. I hang all of their clothes to avoid the dresser issue. The under-the-bed storage container is a great idea too. I have a container with wheels under my bed and it is easy to slide in and out.

Hmmm. I don't know about "fun" but her is what we do and it seems to work...most of the time. The shirt issue drives me nuts. Watching my son (he is five now) last year, I realized he just doesn't have the dexterity to keep everything in the drawers. And his dresser is rather small, so that added to the problem. So I hang up everything. All of it. It's a little bit of a pain, but it keeps things MUCH neater and my nerves in tact. Underwear, socks, jammies and swim clothes stay in the dresser. He has a lower rack in his closet he can finally reach. (Before moving some stuff, I couldn't use that rack and it just meant getting the clothes down for him).

As far as the toys go, he cleans his mess. And it does take longer his way, but he does it himself with some guidance so it's his time he is wasting. I try to go in and check on him, remind him to clean as he is playing. But we all know this is tough, especially if your child is like mine and plays with multiple sets at once (last night his Ghostbusters were riding a pirate ship to help Batman fight the lego invaders :) ). So on those days when everything gets trashed he piles it all up in one spot. In his little brain, once it's consolidated, it's less to pick up. Some days he'll get right on it and start picking up, but most days he needs motivation. So I will hand him a container and tell him to pick up all the legos. When he's done we go to the next toy. Sometimes I will simply tell him to pick up 10 things and when he's done then I'll tell him to pick up three things, etc... Sometimes we'll put on music, and ask him to pick up a certain toy set by the end of the song. We also had bags for storage until recently. I had a small cardboard box we used for cleanup. "Can you put all the legos in here for me?" And then I would poor the box contents in the bag. On days when he is arguing and won't pick up, toys start going into toy time out. I'll set a timer in his room. "You have X amount of time to pick up X". (We do this only after the fight has been going on for a while). If the item in question doesn't get picked up in the allotted time (and he is always given AMPLE time), it goes in toy time out for three days. We stick the toy on top of the refrigerator...he can see it, but not play with it. I cannot remember the last time we have had to implement toy time out.

We don't do allowance or reward charts for chores. We remind the kids that it's part of being a family...we do our part. I doubt there is any real way to make it fun. But maybe ways to make your child more agreeable to the idea.

Her idea of clean and your idea of clean might be two completely different things. You could help her clean it and get it the way you expect her to have it and then take some pictures. Get the pictures to fit onto a piece of paper and laminate it and hang it by her light switch (or somewhere else where it will be easy for her to see). When it's time for her room to be cleaned up tell her that you want it to look the way it does in the pictures.

Also, explain to your daughter that it's not safe to have all of the little pieces of toys laying all over the floor and have your daughter give you some input as to what would help her to keep her things put away and keep her room more neat and tidy. If you get her involved in coming up with a solution she will be more likely to keep up with her end of the deal.

Rotate the toys, some get stored for 3 months, then get those out and store some others, it's like Christmas when they get the toys out they haven't seen for awhile. I do 5 minute drills with my girls throughout the week-sometimes clean up toys for 5 minutes-if they make a fuss it goes up to ten minutes! Sometimes I will just say all the barbie stuff or all the polly pocket stuff and the 5 pairs of shoes that are on the floor! I have 2 girls who play together in both rooms, so we all clean one room I pick an area for each girl and for myself, when that room is done we have a snack then do the other room, they do a much better job if I am in there with them and they need to learn 'how' to clean their room. The first time you tell a toddler to clean up they have no clue what you are saying-you have to show them how-my girls are 6 and 4 and I am still giving instructions on how to do things.

As for clothes, as long a they are in drawers I'm happy, I go in and re-organize them from time to time and remove the clothes they have lost interest in wearing, sometimes I move them to the top, sometimes I put them in the 'to-be-sold' pile.

A small reward system for days the room gets picked up VERY WELL might be helpful. A favorite dessert after dinner, a trip to the library-or wherever they like to go. Mine love to go to Sephora and try on make-up-that is a huge treat for them (and mommy usually ends up finding something spectacular too!!) Or taking them to a movie and getting popcorn if the room is acceptably clean by bedtime each night. If it is done each night it will be much easier to do. If only I could do this! If you have any ideas to make cleaning more fun for mommies that would be good too!

Good luck and God bless!

Storage space can be a problem and I never thought it was fair to surround a kid with a mountain of stuff and then expect them to be able to keep it organized and neat. It's like putting them in charge of a warehouse and expecting them to keep inventory. It's a skill that is learned over time (sometimes a LONG time) and you need to start with a very small inventory.
Clear the room might be your only option.
But you can be flexible about it.
How about he is allowed one favorite toy at a time in his room and he can switch out favorites once a week?
With my son, he was a firetruck / fireman expert by the age of three. One of the fire safety videos we got him had a fireman explain why it's a good idea to keep your room clean. If there's an emergency and the house is full of smoke and you have to crawl out to get to safety, you do NOT want a mountain of stuff in your way while you are doing it. Same thing if a fireman has to come in to get you. He can't be carrying you out while he's tripping all over your clothes and toys.

i have found that with my boys (5 and twin 3) that as long i am helping they will clean up... they just dont want to do it alone. so.... we have a deal that as long as they are helping i,i will help them get their toys all on the shelves. if they quit helping i start putting the toys that im picking up in a laundry basket. i keep putting them in the basket until they are all up or they start helping again. whatever toys end up in the basket goes onto the top of their entertainment center until they actively participate in clean up time for 3 days in a row. when i do pull them down i give them 5 min to put those toys up by theirselves.... whats not out of the basket and in its place will go back up out of reach!

this has worked for us as oposed to just donating them, because earning the toys back gives them a goal to work toward. plus they are happy because they are getting my help...

ok rule #1 : he/she is only 6. 90% of 6 yr olds don't have clean rooms all the time , they just don't get the concept , " when you get done playing with it put it away before you get something else out".

you need to break it down into 10 min intervals.
Have him/her clean ONE area or thing for about 10 mins then move on to the next thing. Take 10 mins every night and put things away together before bed.
maybe have him/her ask permission to get the next toy out when they are done playing with the first toy. Then you could ask if the other one is put up before they get the next one out.
Put a gate up to keep the toddler out.

Clothes: teach them to put them away nicely. they are only 6 so you really can't expect them to put clothes away nicely, I was blessed/cursed with a little boy that's anal about his clothes, on and off him so he is very careful about putting them away. My 9 yr old still doesn't do much more than wadding them up and shoving them in a drawer.

I think making a fun game out of it would only last so long. Pretty soon he'd realize hey, this is work and I'm not gonna do it. You have to give him the incentive to keep it clean by having him do it before he can do anything else. If it's really a disaster, it will probably be overwhelming for him to clean it all by himself. I think your idea to remove the extras is good. Do it while he's at school, and he probably won't even notice what's missing. Just tell him you cleaned his room for him this once, but now he has to keep it clean. I did that with my daughter. One day while she was at school, I went in there and cleaned out the clutter, got rid of some things she never played with or looked at, and made everything organized. I told her she would have to keep it up, and wouldn't have her TV or computer time until her room was picked up and her bed made. So now she makes her bed every morning and makes sure the dirty laundry is in the hamper and there is nothing laying on her floor. If she forgets, I just remind her that she will get none of her privileges until she takes care of her room. That was the only thing that worked.

tell him that you want him to have all his fun toys, but that he needs to learn to take care of them. put away all the toys so it's managable, and let him earn a "new" toy each time his room is clean.

that's one idea. although, what's the big deal? a good relationship is more important than a clean room, in my opinion.

I have had some same issues with my 5 year old. So we started a racing game. We see who can clean up their rooms first. If she wins we get an ice cream treat if I win both of us get no treat. Of course she has one room I have 4 rooms but it gets her excited to clean and she will actually ask me to play race with her! I check her progress once and a while to make sure she knows where & how things get put away and if it is not done right I explain to her how I want it done and all has to be done right to get the treat. It has worked better that i expected when I started it and if fun.

This may not be "fun" but it's simple and I bet will work after one or two times.
Tell your son, "Please pick up any toys you would like to keep by dinner time" (or any time you want to pick) Say NOTHING else. If he fails to pick them up go in his room, collect them all and put them away where he can't get them. Then when he asks where they are say "Oh what a bummer, you didnt pick them up. How are you going to earn them back?" Then you decide on some extra chores he can do to get his stuff back.
I bet once or twice, he'll get it!

We have limited toys in the bedrooms. To clean-up, what has worked for my 7YO is a "race"....they get 10 minutes to pick-up and whoever does the best job (I also have a 5YO and 2YO and I base it on their ability) wins a prize (I give 2nd and 3rd place for participation as well). My 7YO ASKS to play this game now.

Unfortunately (for you) the fun thing is to clean up together. Make it a game or a race. DS is 5 and I have started gradually taking out the toys that I haven't seen him play with in a while. If he doesn't ask about them for a few weeks, they go into storage (top of my closet). We still clean up together at the end of the day. I will give him choices - do you want to do the lego while I do the cars or the other way around? We still try to get done fastest.

Six is old enough to understand danger for the baby. I think it would be fair to let her know that she needs to pick up small pieces off the floor before she leaves the room. You could also get her a latch that she can latch the room from outside when she leaves it so the toddler can't get in.

We have had a much easier time since getting a cleaning lady. DS knows that any unfound pieces left on the floor are likely to get vacuumed away. So we clean up what we see on the floor daily, but do an extra careful check under and behind the furniture before she comes.

As far as the clothes go - I think you are stuck unless you do it yourself. I base this upon looking at DH's drawers after he puts away, or takes things out.

I have a four year old and he loves to leave his legos and dump trucks in the living room. He has a bedroom and a toy room. I have been nice about asking him to clean up and constantly reminding him, but stepping on a lego at night when the room is dark is not so pleasant. So I told him, "You know if you don't start picking up your trucks and legos, I am going to have to take them and donate them to the children who don't have toys." He said "noooo!!" and cleaned them up right away. It isn't a fun thing to do, but reinforces your point.

I know you said that the room isn't big enough for storage containers but putting pieces in bags doesn't seem like it would be that easy for a 6 year old. They need to be able to clearly identify where all the pieces go. Bags are ambiguous and amorphous. Perhaps one of those plastic rolling storage drawers? I'd strongly encourage you to get some kind of solid storage system even if you have to take a piece of furniture out of the room.

Also, take out half of the shirts in the drawer and keep them in the laundry room and rotate them in or something. A half empty drawer is much easier for little hands to navigate than one that's stuffed or even just full.