Baby Never Sleeps! Help!!!!

I second the Ferber suggestion. Worked wonders for us. It is hard on you at first, but since little one, and the rest of the family aren't getting much sleep anyway, things can only get better. Ferber says it in his book, but for additional emphasis, in order for it to work, you must be fully committed to the method. If you pick her up after 20 minutes of screaming, all you've accomplished is to teach her that she needs to scream for 20 minutes before being picked up.

I just wanted to write and say I'm so sorry. Our first child was just like this...he was up almost every hour every single night. Sometimes he was up every 15 minutes. It was ridiculous. We were so sleep deprived it was crazy- I had no short term memory after a year of this. I read every sleep book out there and tried it all. We also resorted to co sleeping bc at that point you will do anything in the universe to get some sleep. It did not stop our son from waking up just as often but at least we were close so I could go back to sleep quicker. When he was 1 we started doing cry it out (in desperation - I really didn't want to do it). But it never worked. He never stopped crying himself to sleep which was awful. We did it night after night for maybe half a year. My husband would make me go walk the dogs bc it was so hard. He never learned to put himself to sleep. It was very sad. He is the only baby I have ever heard of that CIO did not work... AT ALL. The good thing though was crying it out taught him to sleep 3-4 hours at a time. This was a huge improvement as far as I was concerned. I still wonder why he was like this. The doctors never could figure it out. I can only guess it was a combination of our son being extra sensitive, extra stubborn (he still is today!), and maybe having a really hard time with teething. My husband also used to take our son out for a drive in the car just so I could get more than 45 minutes of sleep at a time. Anyway, when our son was almost 3 we made a deal with him that if he would sleep in his room he could get a bunk bed (which he really really wanted). This worked! Then when he was about 4 he started sleeping through the night most nights. Now at age 7 he sleeps great. It's been a long road.

You need to address this with your pediatrician, because there's probably a cause for this. My 16 month old doesn't like to sleep, but she still naps for 1-2 hours and sleeps for about 12 hours at night, give or take. She does still wake up to nurse at night, and I've just about made my peace with that.

For naps, I make her a pallet on the floor, lay down with her, nurse her, and she falls asleep. Then I leave her there. She naps longer if I just hold her, but I got really tired of doing that about a month ago because instead of getting stuff done, I was napping myself.

Sounds like you need to try the Ferber method and let her cry a little. I was totally against letting my son cry until he started getting up every hour at night when he was 6 months old. I finally got to the end of my rope and had to resort to the Ferber method. In two or three nights he was sleeping the whole night through. Now, naps took a little longer to work out, but nighttime sleep is the most important for everyone in the house.

Since she is 9 months old, she definitely doesn't need to be nursing at night anymore. It might be a hard couple of nights for you, but it will be worth it all when everyone is well rested. Also, put her to bed earlier like around 8:00pm. I know it seems like she should sleep longer if she goes to bed later, but often that has the opposite effect. I know with my kids it seems the later they get to bed, the earlier they get up.

As far as napping goes, you might want to set a regular schedule if that would work for your lifestyle. She should be taking 2 naps. Probably around 9:30 -10am and then again at 2pm or so. If you can put her down at the same time everyday, she will soon be accustomed to sleeping then. And, I would try to nurse her when she gets up from the nap, not right before. If babies fall asleep nursing, they usually don't sleep as well because they will wake up and think they should still be nursing and cry.

I know it is so hard when you are sleep deprived. My mom always said, this too shall pass. You need to help her get on a schedule. The sooner she knows mom is in charge, the better!

Good luck!
J.

I feel your pain! My daughter does not like to sleep either. She naps about 5 times a day and takes cat naps. Just the other day I started putting her in my bed for naps. I swaddle her, bounce her on a big yoga ball, touch my nose to the bridge of hers and whisper shhhh. If I put her in her crib after this, she'll wake up screaming in 5 min. I started putting her in my bed and then surrounding her with pillows. I know she will wake in about 20 min so I go back in around that time and whisper shhh again until she passes into the next sleep cycle. I have only been doing it for 4 days, but I've gotten a few 2 or 3 hour naps. I had to go in to make sure she was breathing because she has NEVER done that before. Good luck to you. I'm sure you've read alomost every sleep book out there but I've found two books to be helpful: healthy sleep habits, happy child and The happiest baby on the block.

My daughter never did well with naps. If she had naps she'd be up all night. She was always up with the sun. We got heavy curtains to block out the sun. Gave her something a bit more solid before bed. Rice cereal etc. Helped fill her up. We stopped pushing for a way early bed time. We watched her during the day kept her busy and waited to see when she was ready. Usually a little after 8. She would start to get like 5 hours in. But when she woke up I'd just hold her and rock her back to sleep. It took a bit of time but she started sleeping through.

We slept with our daughter for most naps, and most nights. It worked for us.

But this sounds extreme. I would talk with your ped again, and if you don't get anywhere, get a second opinion.

My daughter went through a period where she wasn't sleeping but for short naps and then she'd be awake for hours - at 2 mos. old. Sixteen hours she stayed awake once, with a 2-hour nap. I was a raving lunatic.

She couldn't / didn't want to sleep on her back. After a few nights of her falling asleep on me on my chest on her stomach, it occurred to me that maybe that was the problem. So I started putting her to sleep on her stomach - as most of us reading this were - and she slept fine.

Good luck!

Has your pediatrician ruled out Acid Reflux? My son had it and was not able to sleep w/o his medicine. We also had to hold him upright for about 15 minutes after each feeding and had a wedge in his crib to elevate his head.

What does your pediatrician say now? I understand about cosleeping b/c you think you have no choice, but you may want to explore other options. If my kids are sleeping in the same room, let alone the same bed, as we are, there is no sleep for anyone!! They will constantly wake up and try to talk to us, wake us up, play, whatever! It is majorly annoying and not restful!

Have you ever just let her wake up in her crib and left her in there? At 9 months she should be able to sleep throught the night without having to eat or have a diaper change.

Do you get home visits by your Parents as Teachers representative? If not, look up your school district info and get signed up immediately!!! It is a free program for your kids under 3 and they will come to you. These are exactly the types of things they help you with and it's so much easier to have someone face to face to answer your questions.