I am supposed to be taking a Mamapedia break during Lent, but I just had to ask this one...
About a year and a half ago my husband had a very bad experience at a local dentist's practice. The owner of the practice was NOT the dentist who messed up, but he hasn't been responsive to resolving the situation. It is to the point that we have threatened him with a lawsuit in hopes of him taking us seriously and resolving our issues.
Well, today was my son's Kindergarten roundup at his new (private) school. I spotted the family's name, which is not very common, and when I saw the dad come in, it was the dentist. So, now here we are starting at a new school and we have threatened to sue one of my son's classmate's dad. Can we say "AWKWARD?" I'm kinda freaking out about it, even though I know it was his employee who caused my husband's dental problems, because we HAVE threatened a lawsuit and I have written negative reviews of his practice on a few websites.
This guy is a pretty big deal in the area--I don't want there to be any problems in the future, and am just praying that he never notices our name in any of the school's lists. (There are 3 classrooms for Kindergarten, so my son might not be in HIS son's actual classroom, but still.)
What would you do? Just ignore it and hope he doesn't notice? I would never dream of speaking about it to ANY other family at the school, so I am certain from my side that there wouldn't be gossip, but I would hate for any negative views being expressed about MY family if he DOES notice. I am excited about everything else about the school--just nervous about this issue.
Whew, you ladies are certainly helping to relieve my anxiety! I am so non-confrontational, so this was really making me sweat :)
Updated: October 2013 - So not only did our sons end up in the same classroom, but we cross paths with this family often and are now friends. Heck, they even invited us over for dinner and the dentist might be hiring my husband's cousin (another dentist).
I would call the principal and request that the boys be placed in separate classrooms. You don't need to elaborate aside from "personal issues that haven't been resolved". Beyond that, I wouldn't do/say anything.
This is O. of those situations where you HAVE to compartmentalize your life. Who knows? Maybe having the kids in class together will actually help the situation.
I think the Big Guy puts us all exactly where we need to be exactly when we need to be there!
He is a professional and it would hurt his practice if he was to make a fuss about it. I would not worry about it at all.
I would ignore it for now, and keep the dental issues in the dental office and keep school issues at school. Your lawsuit has no direct connection to the children in the classroom. If issues between the children crop up, speak to the teacher.
I would discreetly talk to the principal and say "For reasons I do not care to share, I am requesting they be in seperate classrooms. I also expect it to remain confidential to avoid any problems."
Being a private school, they can accomodate you.
Business is business.. But your children have nothing to do with it. Just go about your life and do not sweat it.
The way I feel is, if I am in the right, I have nothing to worry about. It will be the other persons problem. You feel you are in the right, so why should you worry?
This is why we all need to learn to treat each other well and respect each other, you never know when you may end up dealing with others..
I agree with Jo W. Unless the two children become friends, which is unlikely, you will not have to spend time with the dentist. Everyone needs to be cordial and let what happens outside the school stay outside the school.
Oh my goodness, yes it would be less awkward for the adults if your children were not in the same classroom, but I certainly wouldn't go calling in a request to the school that they be in different rooms. Let your child receive the teacher he is meant to have. They are both boys starting K in the same school community. Even if they aren't in the same class this year, they will almost certainly get to know each other eventually. Do you want to make this "request" every year? Of course not, kids are placed with certain teachers very carefully for good reasons. Your son could miss out on some excellent teachers in the name of avoiding awkwardness for the adults. What about after school activities and clubs? You aren't going to be able to isolate your son from this child 100%. Trying to do so only makes you the one that looks bad. The poor dentist's kid hasn't even done anything wrong, and even if you give no reason, it's kind of not fair to his reputation that a parent requests her son not to be in the same class as him. If I were you, I would do nothing. I'd never breathe a word of your professional issues with the Dad to anyone in the school community and just let the chips fall where they may. It's not like you'll have to see the parents every day, it would probably be on a very occasional basis at school events, and you don't have to hang out near them.
I really wouldn't worry about it as an issue at this point. Why worry when it's not actually a problem? Besides, you said you "threatened" a lawsuit, you aren't actually taking legal action at this point, correct? As a business owner I'm sure he hears threats like that frequently from people for everything from minor complaints to serious issues that occur in his office.
The adults need to be adults and not involve the children. No mentions at school for any reason Of your conflict, polite and courteous, use your manmers. Bringing it to an inappropriate venue like school could result in slander lawsuit.
You would hope that he is an adult and a professional person. The family and business should be separate. So you shouldn't worry about anything in that regard. If you are super worried though, why not ask the school to make sure your kids are in separate classrooms? You could put a note in your file stating that you have a business issue/lawsuit etc that is unresolved and you need your child to be in a different class than the other child. Hope this helps!
I would talk to the principle and let them know you would like them to be in separate class rooms. They may have some interaction but you would like to not have to have contact at class parties I am sure if you can keep from it. They should understand.
Good luck and God Bless!
unless an issue comes up at the school, Id let the issue stay outside the school. dentists see alot of patients a day they dont even have time to deal with all the complaints I am sure the secretaries hear....my bestit would tell you to say something like "u gona fix my husbands teeth?" but shes not right all the time :) Id let it go for my childrens sake. school is like their space adn not a place for adult issues. good luck keeping quiet :)
I agree with most of the answers below (except for requesting the school keep the kids in separate classes, that's really not necessary). I do suggest that you refrain from writing any more negative reviews online. Not only can that be interpreted as going overboard, but could actually hurt a possble lawsuit.
I only know about 3 of my kids' classmates parents. Really it is a non issue.
