Assistance

Updated on June 30, 2007
C.T. asks from Waco, TX
17 answers

I am thinking about leaving my husband and I am scared to death about it. I need to know how to find out about assistance when it comes to work, child care, money and such. I know that there is medicaid but I will be living with my parents and unfortunately they will count their income which will put us over the top for help from them.

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J.M.

answers from San Antonio on

Hi, C.. You need to go online to Texas.org, the website for all offered through the state and search. The DHS has many more programs than just welfare and medicaid. I can sympathize with you in a way. My husband of ten years left when I was pregnant with my last baby who is now six months old. I also have a 22 month old and a five year old. You can do it if it is what you want and need.

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K.W.

answers from Lubbock on

Go to or call the local (to where you'll be living after you move) department of family services. It should be in your phone book in the government pages. Get yourself hooked up w/ a case worker. They'll help you figure out what you need to do to qualify. Good luck to you.

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R.G.

answers from San Antonio on

Hello C.,
I know you are in a scary place right now...but just think of what is best for your kids. If you are unhappy in your marriage...the kids can tell & they need to feel that you are ok.
In Texas stanbdard family law states that for 1 child he is required to provide 20% of his annual pay plus health insurance. 2 or more children is 25% plus health insurance.
As far as getting a job...get yourself out there. If you cannot phyically leave right now...do it on the internet. Most companies have websites now & you can fill out everything over the internet. Also try Monster.com, Jobs.com. You can create resumes & market yourself on those.
As far as other type os assistance...I'm not sure. But reach out to some of the places the other moms have mentioned. Best of luck & I'm always available to chat if you need an ear. R. G. ____@____.com

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L.R.

answers from San Antonio on

C. I don't know if you know this, but you can apply for aid through the government. You have to show proof that you are "renting space there and they will not count their income only yours. I don't know what is going on in your personal life, but I will keep you in my prayers. good luck!

In regards to "lacy's" comment, as long as you are a good parent and trying to provide there is nothing this man can do to take your kids away! It is not living in "poverty", it is help for families in need. No one said once you are on welfare you are trapped. I don't know where she gets her ideas from, but from a once single mothers view it is help you and your kids need. You do what is best for you and your babies! You show this man you can do it without him! Don't depend on him to pay child support or provide insurance because that system is broken. Again I wish you the best and I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

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M.M.

answers from Fayetteville on

I can't really give you advice on leaving your husband but as for the medicade part I can tell you what I know from personal experience. I got pregnant when I was in college. I wasn't married and lived in the dorms with my roomate. I was able to qualify for it because they just calculated my salary. They didn't calculate my roomate or my fiance. He went with me and the lady there told me that it was only based on my income because I was considered the head of household. Meaning that I was the head even though I was living with someone else. I don't know if this will help you or if rules are different from state to state. I was in GA then. Good luck with everything.

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J.F.

answers from Dallas on

C. -

Sorry to hear about your marriage troubles. You might try contacting the family guidence and outreach center of Lubbock. ###-###-####. They might be able to point you in the right direction.

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L.F.

answers from Austin on

C.,

I'm trying to get details, but so far I know that you can apply for Texas Aid for Needy Families (TANF) and there is a way you can apply for the rest by HOW you fill out the documents - your parents' income will not matter.

I will have the rest of the info for you this afternoon. Please call me later today - home is ###-###-#### and cell is ###-###-####.

Hang in.

L.

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J.V.

answers from Austin on

I have heard of a health care plan for your kids through Seton Hospital. They advertise it on the radio every so often. But I think its really cheap if not free. Also there is WIC, which is basically food stamps and it covers alot of the basics, bread, milk, cheese. You can look that up on line, but a girl I work with has that and says it comes out to about 400$ for food a month. Its not food stamps anymore, but they put it on a credit card so you just scan the items you are allowed to buy. As far as looking for a job? You can look on craigslist.org and look up job postings every day. And my work is hiring its for a reatil furniture store in the office. If you want to e-mail me a personal message I can tell you more about it. Wish you good luck.

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S.F.

answers from Austin on

Consult an family/divorce lawyer. To get the maximum benefit from his/her advice see them before you leave and don't tell anyone you are going. They can tell you when and what moves to make and then you can do it on your own time or not at all. You will need to tell people once you decide to make a move or ask for support if you decide to stay, but bringing family and friends into a 'maybe' situation is difficult for all.

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E.J.

answers from San Antonio on

If you are the same woman who posted last week about your husband saying you need to be the hot wife he married, then GOOD FOR YOU! You can also try calling 211 rather than 411, they can probably point you in some different directions to help you! Good Luck and God Bless!

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L.F.

answers from Brownsville on

Hello C.. I am sorry that you are going through this difficult time. In so far as counting your parents income---I dont think they will. I moved back home at one time with my son BUT I told the Dept of Human Services that I was paying my parents rent in order to get help. (Otherwise they would not help me). From what I rememberm they NEVER asked my parents income...they DID ask if my parents helped us financially & I said no. I told them that I had to pay them rent & pay X amt toward the light bill and furnish our own food. I hated lying but I got tired of all the damn Mexican nationals coming across the border & lying & giving fake addresses in the states in order to get food stamps, housing, a monthly check and medicaid!!!
(Unbelieveable--I told them that my son & I were going to be living in a carand they still said i made too much money! HA! Dont get me wrong, I am Mexican-=American, but when eople come from Mexico & take away from the U.S. citizens who REALLY NEED the help--it pisses me off....I see it all too often---they get groceries with food stamps and then drive off in their brand new lincoln continentals. I hate telling you this...but if you want the help, you will have to lie. (By the way - let your partents know because they will call and ask them how much rent you pay...etc...) GOOD LUCK & I will say a prayer for you.
L.

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S.C.

answers from San Antonio on

Hi C.,
I am so sorry to hear about your situation. I know its hard but be strong. Things happen for a reason. I know that sounds cliche but its true. Something bigger and better will come along soon for you. Well, I know that WIC will help you out. Just tell them that your situation and they will help you out with a few things. I know of a few contract agencies that will help you with work. I got a very good job with Coca-Cola Enterprises through a contract agency, as well as an awesome job with American Express as well (unfortunately my bad relationship was the reason why I left that job). A lot of jobs through these contract agencies are temp to hire so that is a plus. I would however join a couple of agencies just to make sure you have the best chance of always having work. If you are interested in contacting these agencies, just let me know and I will be glad to give you the names and numbers. I hope this helps. Take care and good luck. "Lifes problems wouldnt be called hurdles if there wasnt a way to get over them".

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K.W.

answers from Seattle on

This must be tough. Im not really sure why you want to leave but have you tried counseling? Church? My husband and I had issues for a little bit but we both became christians and I attend therapy. It has helped a lot. I just knew I loved him and I didn't want to put our daughter through that. If your mind is already made up then it will be stressful for a while. The kids will have to go to daycare while you work fulltime. As for daycares I don't know any personally. Im a stay at home mom and if I need a sitter a girl from my church watches her. when I was looking in to daycares a lot of them had waiting list. I had heard little fisher's is a good one. Im not sure how to really help you other then try to make our marriage work but I know thats not always possible.

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V.B.

answers from San Antonio on

The best thing you can do is mom in with your parents, get a job and then when things a little more settled emotionally and regular in your job. Move out into the smallest size apartment you can. (Maybe a two bedroom?) Eastablish your residence and go to the Public assistance office. They can help your with money for housing,foodstamps,medical,dental(chips),filing for child support ( if you want to but if your situation was abusive may not ask for that or give his name) That way in an abusive situation the other person does not readily have away to find you.
It is not going to be easy at all but there is help. Also if the kiddos are under two you can recieve WIC ( This program helps provide milk, chesse, and BABY FORMULA) About daycare, the Texas work office ( in San Antonio off Austin hwy) you go to a class and after that they can help you with day care and even a little gas money while your looking ( and daycare after you start).

I was in college when I got preggie with first baby and did not have insurance ( husband contracted) and so if you need some help email,ok?

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J.K.

answers from Austin on

C.,
I have been there myself. I have now been divorced for 2 years. I left my husband when my daughter was 6 months. There was a lot going on. Now with the custody fight that has been hard since now he wants to be daddy... I have her most of the time. I to live with my parents. I know its hard but a friend of mine has use welfare seems to help her. There is ins for kids that is not expensive but i am drawing a blank on what its called. Just do alot of research before you take the steps have everything lined up. I was unable to do that. I walked out the next day after my ex drop our baby on the floor and hit her on her crib. so I was in bad sharp for a few months and thanks to my parents it helped. The frist thing he did was drop me from all the credit cards so I was luck that I had 2 in my name. Then he closed the account on me and sent me with 8 dollars. So just have everything ready... If you have any question please email.. I am there for you... good luck

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J.S.

answers from Albuquerque on

Your parents income DOES matter and the income of your husband. I was on medicaid and foodstamps and yes I had to lie and get someone else to help me that had a connection in the office. When I tried renewing they told me that my BF was helping me cause I transfered some money into his account for a bill that I had to pay. They ask for bank statements and on the form it asks for EVERYONE that lives in the household and work/income etc...

There is CCDS for childcare but you need to sign up now cause there is a wait...and is with housing.

If you get all this help They will give it to you for maybe a year...and than they will start asking about the father and childsupport. In most cases they make the father pay for all the assistance.

Try looking up ANY BABY CAN. They helped me alot. But I dont know if everyone can get there services. I think only families whos kids have had health complications. My baby was premature and thats why I had there help.

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L.D.

answers from Austin on

my sister in law got WIC and food stamp and medicaid and lived with her parents. she just told them she paid a little rent to her parents. hope this helps, just go and talk with a social worker. I know you can for sure get WIC (for kids 5 and under).

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