Are Party Favors Really Necessary?

I agree with you on this. It is such a waste! What I have done in the past is have a big bowl by the door of items that I know my kids would use. Bubbles, stickers, and little containers of play-doh are good ones. I make a little sign by the bowl saying 'pick 2'. That way kids take what they actually want, the parents can monitor and use discretion, and my kids use the leftovers. You could also do little packs of goldfish or other popular snack. It cuts down on time assembling all the bags too, which was my main motivation!
Good luck!

This year for my 4 year old's birthday I got a plain T-shirt from Walmart and made a stencil out of freezer paper (just look up freezer paper stencil on instructables.com) and painted a robot onto a shirt. One for each child. I have seen the kids since then wearing their cool shirts. It was actually very easy after you did the first one. I actually taped three sheets of freezer paper together and then cut out my stencil. You then iron it onto the shirt and paint. Let dry and then remove stencil. The kids actually wore their shirts at the party and then have something they can actually use. The only problem is you have to find out shirt sizes beforehand.

im really bad, my kids are 5 and 4 and they dont 'know' birthday parties yet, we havent had any with friends yet... but one of my girlfriends has a clever take home idea that also works to tell everyone its time to leave... she makes cupcakes instead of a cake (or frosted sugar cookies on a stick) and wraps them individually. they leave out one cupcake for her son and the birthday son, then hands out the rest shortly after as people are leaving. its a little backwards bc i personally would do presents after cake, but it WORKS. kids are way more excited about sugary sweet treats than hanging out at a party... if it was me, i would opt for a less sugar based treat, but the principle is the same! nothing gets wasted and its cheaper then junk toys!

I am with you about the stupid party favors! Mamasource moms unite! Say NO to party junk!

Furthermore, for my 8yo daughter's birthdays I have specified NO GIFTS. Lord knows she doesn't need any more stuff, the guests' moms don't need another item on their to-do lists (and frankly some kids' families can't afford to drop $ on a gift) and I don't think it's any fun for kids to watch someone else open presents.

Gifts and party favors are NOT a must-have in order for a birthday party to be fun.

I think if you do the party favors, get things that the kids would actually use. Bandaids,lipgloss,healthsnacks,baked minature cookies,pocket tissues with characters on them...etc. I have been to parties that the goodie bags are paper bags that the birthday child has made themselves for each guest with markers,glitter,etc... and it included a juice,friut of your choice and cereal bar.

Thank you for raising this issue. I feel exactly the same way that you do. Here are a couple of suggestions:
give each child a set of watercolors (the kind with 8 colors and a brush) Rose Art makes them and less expensive than Crayola. It's something they'll use, and every kid likes a fresh one! Another idea is to give each party guest a nice helium-filled balloon to take home. You can use them to decorate the party, then when it's time to go, hand them out. And there's always the option of just saying thanks for coming. Although kids do seem to like goody bags, parents I have spoken to would not mind seeing them become less common, for all the reasons you mention.

Kids DO really look forward to the party favors. Instead of sending them home with a bag full of "trash," if you're trying to be green, think green with the party favors. How about a little packet of flower seeds? You could even throw in a small clay pot and a little strip of craft paints to decorate it with. I'm sure there are web site with ideas for earth friendly party favors.

I agree with you and I hate those little bags of junk. They always end up costing an arm and a leg.
What I have done for my kids is gone to the dollar store and purchased books for the kids. Then, my son wrote 'thank you for coming to my party' on the inside cover of each book. It's a heck of a lot cheaper, and the kids can use it for years.

i agree they are a waste of time especially for that age.

maybe a little older. but even then i gave for my sons 3rd bday (he had older guests) i gave a little colouring pad and some small tub of play dough and a row of chalk. and that was it. all stuff that i could buy in bulk for a little more but what ever.

i agree you shouldnt have to do it.

and for the party planner who said that kids "kids have grown to expect them" well maybe those parents should teach those kids some manners and to not be a generation of give me give me! really where are the mannors these days. adults dont need party favors why do they have to have them all the time. and if the adult guest complains well you know not to invite that one back again right!

I totally agree with you and have not given those items out ! my daughter has a summer Birthday and we have given in the previous years: a ball(reg.size), the kind you can buy in the big bins at target(2$), all kids love balls and we put them all in a huge bag and dropped them out and they ran for their favourite colour !a foam handbag, that they decorated as a craft, this year I bought them a fan (lady kind asian (1$) and a haircrunchie with rhinestones (1$), one year I got chinese parasoles (for 3$), these things can be all used. for my boy I am planning on doing matchbox cars and sandtoys, bucket, shovel! one year we did kites (2$). the kids really enjoy these gifts, because they can actually play with them !hope you can come up with something you like !

I too got wary of all the garbage my kids came home with. There are several sites that specialize on enviro friendly party favors....they are a bit more expensive, but more useful and high quality....I even found enviro friendly bags to put the stuff in. I have given colored pencils and a small notebook, train whistles, $5 GC to a local ice cream shop for example. I also went with higher quality, allergen free candy...again, one lollipop instead of 25 gum balls. Because it's more $$$, I went with the less is more, and have had no complaints. In our area, a goody bag is a given....I am not happy with that, but I go with the flow on it.....

I feel the same way. For my daughter's third birthday, I did the following:

1. Book exchange in lieu of gifts. Every child brought an age appropriate, new, gift wrapped book and I handed them out at the end of the party. This way, every child got a gift. It was a MAJOR hit. I reserved the birthday presents for my daughter for the smaller family gathering we had on her actual birthdate.

2. I got a helium balloon bouquet and used those to decorate the house. I wrote a special message to each child on the balloon, and they took theirs home. Easy clean up, and little waste as each kid was thrilled to have a balloon to take home with them.

And even though it wasn't part of your question, I also saved money on the cake. I baked cupcakes and left them "blank". I had two kinds of icing (pink and white) and let each child choose what color they wanted. Then I put out sprinkles and candy toppings and they got to "build their own" cupcake. That was a great activity and the kids loved it.

Good luck. Have fun!
M.

There are great, inexpensive ways to give party favors that are good for the environment. For example, from a lot of craft stores you can buy little clay flower pots and then buy some soil and let kids plant their own flower seeds. Or, you can use an egg carton-just cut out the bottoms which then become the planters. A packet of seeds can be $1 if you go to a dollar store, and kids usually love getting to plant and water and watch their plant grow. It also teaches about the enviroment and is good for the environment. For adults, you can give plants that can be just a few dollars in any lawn and garden section at all stores from WalMart to Lowes and Home Depot. Older kids (in my experience ages 4-8) enjoy the gardening sets you can get really cheap (especially this time of year) that have a watering pot and shovel. Sometimes you can find 99 cent books, and one of those would be a good favor. I enjoy donations made in my honor, and know a lot of others who do as well. While that isn't always the best financially, it can be better to have trees planted or donate to a cause (cancer, cystic fibrosis--find something that means a lot to you). And if you do something like that, you can give the child a picture of "their" tree, which I know many kids also like. All that being said, I don't think they are necessary, really, and I know we end up giving most of those toys to charity for kids who are less fortunate. Oh! One of the best favors I've heard of was a picture of each child with the birthday kid or during the party on a frame they decorated. The frames can be magnetic and able to hang, so they can go almost anywhere in a child's room. The frames can be decorated with stones, twigs, etc on wood, so they're not bad for the environment, and usually you only have to buy glue b/c the other materials you can take out of your yard. Whatever you do though, just be comfortable with your decision!

My son's last birthday party was a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles themed TaeKwonDo party. I did the turtle masks instead of party hats and a turtle ring. That's it. Everyone seemed happy and fine.

For other gatherings, like wedding, showers, etc. I prepare gifts for 1/2 the number of expected guests. Guys don't do goody bags, and some people don't want them. My cousin did 3 types of 'gifts' for every placesetting at her 200+ guest wedding. Over half of them were left sitting on the table.

Another idea, inleu of goody bags is personalized napkins. My friend had a wedding and didn't want to do goody bags but was having an open bar. Do personalized napkins. You'll need napkins, and if someone wants to remember your special day, they can take one home.
M.

As a small business that has helped to host thousands of children's birthday parties, I can tell you that nearly every party giver does provide goodie bags. The two year olds that attend are not going to expect them; but at two year old birthdays there are usually a mixture of ages due to cousins and siblings attending. The older children (three and up) have come to expect goodie bags and when the party ends, they vocally inquire "where is my goodie bag?" I have seen them continually ask even when their parent has told them to stop.

Agreed, pinwheels and bouncy balls, kazoos, play money, etc are all junk that are quickly forgotten and probably in the trash within a few weeks.

For the two and younger crowd, you can go with a Party Gift that is a little more thoughtful. How about a Bernstein Bears book? I always found these books were enjoyed by my children, and they always had an important social message that the child could learn.

The older children seem to enjoy the more traditional loot (junk), so giving them a book is a bit risky. I have actually heard a three year old proclaim "man, that's lame" in a loud voice. If you don't mind that kind of criticism, it may give these children's parents a "teachable moment" on the way home from the party as how to accept a gift that they are disappointed in receiving. Later the child may also find that they enjoy the book and learn that books are a good alternative to the noise makers, etc.

I am not real happy with whoever invented the goodie bag. It is a waste and you need to be very careful when you pick the things that go inside when dealing with the under three crowd to avoid choking hazard items.

Best wishes for your two year old's birthday party. I hope it is very successful!

I hate goodie bags!!! I never offer them at our parties and usually throw away all or most of what the boys bring home from other parties. Who ever started them was just evil!!!

OK, that being said. We always have (except once) at home parties and we do theme parties. For the Blue's Clue's theme, I went on line and ordered a bag of Blue's Clue's little figurines. Each kid got one to take home. When we did Pirate theme, (my twins were born on Halloween so we have a benefit there) each kid went home with an eye patch and bandana. For the Bowling Alley birthday, I made each kid a bowling t-shirt (cost about $3 per shirt). And for Harry Potter birthday last year, each kid got a spell book, a wand and a potion that we made during the party to take home. Granted, we made the wands and printed out age appropriate puzzles, mazes, jokes, etc to make the spell book. Since I am artsy-crafty, I enjoy making stuff like that that many parents have said thank you for not doing the usual goodie bad. I like to give the kids something to take home but don't feel bad if there simply is nothing. They got to have fun and food and cake/ice cream. When we were kids, that's all we got and we loved it. Do what you want and don't fall under the mommy 'peer pressure'.

As a last note, what is really odd, most of the moms I know don't like giving or receiving goodie bags but feel pressured to because it is the norm.

Stand firm!!!

Good luck and have fun with the birthday party!
Jules

I got the kids a jumprope for a dollar each, and they seemed excited. One year I gave out hulla hoops for like $2 each. Hopefully the kids used them, b/c they seemed to like them. I agree w/ most of the junk they get, but i thought this would be fun, health-promoting 'treats". Good luck!

we just had a party and went green.I made a note in the evite that as an effort for going green, we are not doing goody bags.
I debated doing little pkgs of flower seeds cuz all kids like those.

I think out of 40 kids only one asked me if we were doing goody bags.
What we DID do though, was a pinata. We filled it with candy and erasers and tattoos and gave everyone a paper lunch bag and it helped. :)

I don't think you're being a spoil sport at all-- I think you're being responsible! Kids get so much junk all the time, do they really need more? I solved this dilemma by making iced sugar cookies and handing them out at the door as favors. Not as if kids need more sugar, but at least they disappeared after they were eaten!

On the whole "green" subject, we used Preserve reusable plasticware to cut down on trash, and we had everyone bring a gift for a children's charity to cut down on the amount of stuff our daughter got for her 1st birthday. It worked out well and I feel like we really made a difference. Hope that helps!

I have switched to having the kids make things at parties and that is what they take home. I have seen this a lot too. Even for two year olds. We did a painting party for our two year old (now 4) and the kids got to take home their art work. My daughter did a manicure/pedicure party and the girls got to take home some nail polish and the toe seperator things...not only is it more specific to the party, but it's hopefully things they will use more. I agree though, the bag of things that are cheap and break are not a good idea anymore. I had a friend buy the at home Build-a-Bear kit and that worked well too...good luck!

I don't feel that party favors are necessary but somehow I end up breaking down and making goody bags for the kids each year. However, I have, in the past, gone to the dollar store and found a coloring book for each kid or a book, something that most kids will use. I stopped the little party favors long ago. Now that my kids are older, I usually put some candy in a bag for the goody bags. Simple, fairly cheap and most kids will eat the candy!! Good luck.

For my son's last party, I baked cookies and gave them to the kids as favors. Just 3 cookies each, but they seemed excited to get them. i was aware that one child had a dietry restriction, and got her special stickers. I have been to a party where the kids each got a prebaked cupcake and got to decorate it, and bring it home as their favor, and that was a fun idea. I love the seed idea, that would certianly be keeping with your "green" ideas!

I agree with you though...i also dislike the little junk favors that break within a few minutes.

When my kids were younger everyone did goody bags but now that they are getting older there seem to be fewer of them. Some of the ones I have liked had a few items that were useful - a tub of playdough, a reusable drink cup, a sand bucket and shovel, fruit snacks, swim goggles, and sunglasses were a few of the things we have gotten and actually used. A few parties skipped the goody bag entirely and just sent the kids home with the craft they did. No one seemed to notice or mind.

Hi. I don't think you are being a spoil sport. My son just turned 4, and we have yet to send home party favors. Like you, I just look at it as more junk that will get thrown away when they get home, so why waste our money and the kids parents time? We usually have helium balloons (just the latex ones) at the party, so when kids leave, to get rid of the balloons, we just send the kids home with balloons.

I agree with everyone with all that junk that is either broken by the time you get home or is something they will never play with. What did last year was I requested shirt sizes when they RSVPed. I bought 2 packs of white undershirts from walmart & iron transfers from A.C.Moore & made each kid a Clifford t-shirt (was the party theme).I also printed coloring pictures off the internet to make a coloring book & this time a year you can find crayons everywhere. We just went to a party last weekend & the party favors consisted of a bucket & shovel (instead of bag) jump rope, side walk chalk, cup from the Disney Store & I think there might have been something else but I can't remember what but it was a great idea everything is usable.

For my daughters birthday this year I didn't want to do party favors, but felt bad about sending the kids home with nothing. I went to Michael's and they have decent inexpensive crafts. All the kids at the party loved the idea. Not only did it give them something to do, but they got to bring something home they made. I figure the crafts are more likely to be saved or used than the stuff in the gift bags, and since my daughter has ADHD and can't have a lot of sugar I don't like to give out candy. In the end I think I even spent less for the craft stuff than I would if I did party bags.

if you want to send them home with something have it be something they made or something they can eat. or something you know they actiually will like. i got the babies that came to one birthday party a toy that was a dollar at walmart. i loved it so i knew the parents would actually keep it.

I completely agree about the "junk" in goodie bags. I did that once and thought "why?" Just going along with what everyone did but have not done it since. It's a waste of $, resources and a disappointment to the kids. This year I gave away personalized keychains to the kids at my older son's party. They are too old for silly things but I wanted something that said "thanks for coming." These were great, they came 3 in a pack and I got the packs in the $1 spot at Target! I printed out inserts and popped them in. The kids will be able to change them out and most of these kids need a house key at this age so it's something they can use. Anyhow, my other son will be 1 in a couple of weeks and his goodie bags will have ABC and 123 flash cards ($1 spot at Target again), bubbles, small bags of goldfish and crazy straws. I figure the cards can be put up for the younger kids but will ultimately be useful. The bubbles can be blown by or for the kids. Everyone loves goldfish and crazy straws! Some other ideas I've done in the past - stock up on the McDonald's/Wendy's kid books when they come out (they are usually $1 for like 10 coupons) and give out those (you can split them up if the budget is really tight), I have a template for a customizable Hershey bar wrapper (everyone really thought they were neat), $2-3 gift cards to the local ice cream shop. Always keep an eye out in the $1 sections of stores and the clearance aisles. You sometimes find really neat USEFUL things!

Party favors are kind of expected now. But you can be creative so that they are not junkie. For my children's past birthdays I have included coloring books & crayons to match the theme of the party. One big bottle of bubbles with a ribbon tied around it. Pencils and notebooks. Boardbooks. Rubber duckies and bath toys for little ones. You can find stuff at the dollar store or check out Oriental Trading online. Also Michael's had a great $1 aisle that has crafts and stuff. At some of the parties we've gone to we've received puzzles, coupons for ice cream, etc.. Put some thought into it and you can come up with some useful goodie bags that don't need to include junk toys or junk food. Good luck!

in my opinion you're not being a spoil sport! I know when my kid comes home with yet another goodie bag of junk, all the little toys will just end up broken, under the bed, scattered around, etc. Who needs it?! Certainly not the kids, and certainly not the parents!
But who knows, maybe I'm a spoil sport too ;)

I also vote "No"... you are not being a spoil sport!

I will have to say, though that (apparently, unlike a lot of moms here) I really enjoy giving out favors. I get proud of my not-so-common ideas for favors and love to see the kids enjoy them- plus, I've always really loved giving. However, Even with four kids I've never bought junk for my kids' parties. I like the idea of inexpensive yet cool, useful and fun things and also more personal and creative things. I never look at the "party aisle". I also always make and decorate their cake myself, try to make all the food and make the invitations from hand and such... I also really enjoy decorating because it is fun to do and and looks pretty! I don't like the stuff that requires no creativity, and has no personal touch.

Favors have become the norm. To be technical, I'd say that it is proper etiquette to hand out favors at kid's parties. But just because there may be favors, doesn't mean they have to be lame or a waste. I also like the seed idea that a few moms have mentioned.

No, I think you are right on the mark. And as a Mom, I hate coming home with a bag of junk and sugar. I can't tell you how much I resent haivng to deal with that stuff.

However, I do think that the idea of party favors is nice. And I think kids look forward to having some momento. I try to give them for my kids and even at some adult parties, but I stay away from the party aisle. Here are some examples of what I have done.

- Colored bandana instead of paper hats at a farm themed party for a 2 year old (great for dress up)
- Board books for a small number of babies at a first birthday (it was like 4-5 kids and so the expense was low)
- At a flower party, we took pictures of the girls dressed up as flowers and printed them on the spot, the girls also decorated flower pots to take home
- At another first birthday, I gave stuffed animal penguins
- I gave flower head wreaths at a princess dress up party

And so on... it is helpful to make an activity or dress up part of your theme and then let the kids keep the stuff.

If you don't mind a sugar treat, you could also giv eeach kid a fansy lollipop or little bag od chocolates. Just stay away from the cheapskate hard candies and taffy from the bulk aisle.

I don't think they are necessary at all, but I once disappointed a few five year olds by completely ignoring it. It wasn't a great way to end a nice party. You don't have to do a plastic bag of dollar store treats. The last party we went to had books wrapped in tulle--my girls were thrilled. Activities at the party can also provide a take home. We've decorated big cookies, made fairy wings, done art with model magic, colored thematic pictures printed off the internet, and made jewelry. We've also done a more traditional party bag by having guests decorate paper lunch bags with their name and then breaking a pinata stuffed with superballs, candy, and jewelry.

We started doing a "book exchange" in lieu of gifts/party favors. Everyone, including the birthday child brings a new wrapped book to the party. Then, when each child leaves, they take a different wrapped book home. I also usually get balloons ... what child doesn't LOVE a balloon!

I did party favors for my daughter's 1st birthday party because all of the kids there were older than her and I didn't want them to fell left out on the gifts. I did little bags with animal crackers and gummy bears, I also put in pony stickers, and princess dress up items for the girls and toy cars and car stickers for the boys. I even had a little styrofoam project where they could decorate a piece of styrofoam with princess or sports cutouts. Of course I think we left with more of those than anyone but the kids did that and bounced in a moon bounce. They all left happy. It doesn't have to be anything big, just fun!

I totally understand what you mean. I spent money on junk for my son's party. Next time I will be more creative. So, if you feel something will be expected maybe put things in they will use and go to the dollar store. You could put candy, a small notepad with pencil/crayons, something like that.

at my child's last party i gave each kid a gift card to chick fila. i figured that would get used and wont end up in the trash. i was pleasently surprised to see that the kids were excited about it also.

I know what you mean, I don't put candy, maybe one bag of healty chips, the 100 calories type. Also i plan ahead and buy things at Target when its 50% at the 1.00 bin, or CVS and they have the 75% clearance during the season. Stock up and put in bag. Also you can buy crayons for maybe .25 a box and print off coloring pages from the internet, roll the coloring pages with ribbon and place in party bag. i don't purchase the party bags, I buy the brown gift bags/ come in pk of 13 and get them at michaels/ac moore, for 50% coupon, found in your sunday's paper. I decorate the bag w/stamp or put a photo on the bag. Hope this helps out, GOOD LUCK

You're not a spoilsport! You're a voice of reason in a sea of insanity! The whole custom, in my opinion, is nuts. Plastic junk, bouncy balls, more sugary snacks on top of the sugar they've already had...for what?!?